
Hell If We Don't Change Our Ways
A Memoir
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Narrated by:
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Brittany Means
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By:
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Brittany Means
About this listen
Starred review from Kirkus
“Powerful. . .gut-wrenching. . .triumphant. . .exquisitely told. . .A story of survival that left me choked up and cheering.”
—Jeannette Walls, author of The Glass Castle
“I can’t write a story about myself as the sad, quiet child of two drug addicts. That’s not how it was, even when it was. To me, sleeping in the car was normal. Better, it was comfy and fun. I loved my bed made of clothes inside a trash bag that I sank into slowly like Uncle Fester from the Addams Family movie. . . . I loved the motels and their swimming pools and trashy daytime TV channels. . . . Nobody could tell us what to do.”
Brittany Means’s childhood was a blur of highways and traumas that collapsed any effort to track time. Riding shotgun as her mother struggled to escape abusive relationships, Brittany didn’t care where they were going—to a roadside midwestern motel, a shelter, or The Barn in Indiana, the cluttered mansion her Pentecostal grandparents called home—as long as they were together. But every so often, her mom would surprise her—and leave.
As Brittany grew older and questioned her own complicated relationships and the poverty, abuse, and instability that enveloped her, she began to recognize that hell wasn’t only the place she read about in the Bible; it was the cycle of violence that entrapped her family. Through footholds such as horror movies, neuropsychology, and strong bonds, Brittany makes sense of this cycle and finds a way to leave it.
While untangling the web of her most painful memories, Brittany crafts a tale of self-preservation, resilience, and hope with a unique narrative style—a sparkling example of the human ability to withstand the most horrific experiences and still thrive.
©2023 Brittany Means (P)2023 Zibby BooksListeners also enjoyed...
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Story
Join Kenya Barris and Malcolm Gladwell as they bypass pleasantries and promotional banter to deliver raw, unfiltered conversations with some of today’s most influential figures. Featuring titans across a spectrum of professions (from Olympic gold medalists to trailblazing Fortune 500 CEOs and everything in between), The Unusual Suspects with Kenya Barris and Malcolm Gladwell pulls back the curtain to offer listeners unprecedented access to the minds of the world’s most extraordinary individuals and their distinct paths to success.
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UNusually Great!
- By Angela C. on 01-30-25
By: Kenya Barris, and others
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Maybe You Should Talk to Someone
- A Therapist, HER Therapist, and Our Lives Revealed
- By: Lori Gottlieb
- Narrated by: Brittany Pressley
- Length: 14 hrs and 21 mins
- Unabridged
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One day, Lori Gottlieb is a therapist who helps patients in her Los Angeles practice. The next, a crisis causes her world to come crashing down. Enter Wendell, the quirky but seasoned therapist in whose office she suddenly lands. With his balding head, cardigan, and khakis, he seems to have come straight from Therapist Central Casting. Yet he will turn out to be anything but.
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It was like a hallmark movie being waterboarded into my ears for 15 hours
- By Amazon Customer on 10-01-19
By: Lori Gottlieb
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The Madman's Hotel
- By: Niall Breslin
- Narrated by: Niall Breslin
- Length: 4 hrs and 4 mins
- Original Recording
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In the heart of the rolling green hills of Ireland a huge abandoned psychiatric asylum looms large and holds its secrets close, until one family fights to find the truth about their long lost great grandmother. Presented by Irish celebrity and mental health advocate Niall Breslin - this is the untold story of the quest to find patient Julia Leonard, alongside many others, who came to die in St Loman’s Hospital near Dublin. Why was Julia in St Loman’s? And what happened to her and other patients who found themselves within its walls?
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Heart felt Remembrance
- By RosaInGlousta on 11-05-24
By: Niall Breslin
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The Story of Grunge
- By: Michael Stewart Foley, The Great Courses
- Narrated by: Michael Stewart Foley
- Length: 3 hrs
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You can’t truly understand the last decade of the 20th century without a look at the muddy, electrifying rock music that would come to define it: grunge. For such a short-lived genre—at least in the mainstream—grunge had a lasting impact on American music and culture. It also provides a unique lens through which to examine the post-Reagan, pre-internet America of the 1990s. In the six lectures of The Story of Grunge, you’ll explore the rise and evolution of the genre, tracing it from Seattle subculture to MTV and the Billboard charts, all the way to its decline and evolution into new forms.
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A Scholarly Study of Grunge
- By Mark on 03-07-25
By: Michael Stewart Foley, and others
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My Mom's Murder
- By: AYR Media
- Narrated by: Lauren Malloy
- Length: 6 hrs and 35 mins
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When a mysterious stranger unveils a long-hidden truth, Lauren Malloy’s life is thrown into chaos. For years, Lauren believed her mother, Lori, died of natural causes, but the shocking reality is that her loving mother was brutally murdered when Lauren was just an infant. Now, 30 years later, Lauren is on a relentless quest for justice. Over the past four years, she’s embarked on an emotional journey filled with unexpected twists, recording hundreds of hours of interviews with law enforcement, family, friends, and even potential suspects.
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Gripping
- By Emily Palmer on 10-12-24
By: AYR Media
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The Wonder of Stevie
- By: Wesley Morris
- Narrated by: Wesley Morris, Michelle Obama, Barack Obama, and others
- Length: 6 hrs and 10 mins
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The year 1972 saw the beginning of a five-year span in which Stevie Wonder released five groundbreaking, critically acclaimed albums, garnering him more than half a dozen Grammys and more than 10 million albums sold, securing his place as one of the most important American musicians and songwriters in history. For the first time, uncover the untold story of an extraordinary artistic journey that shaped the greatest creative era in popular music history.
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Good but not great
- By Anonymous User on 09-14-24
By: Wesley Morris
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The Demon Next Door
- By: Bryan Burrough
- Narrated by: Steve White
- Length: 2 hrs and 45 mins
- Unabridged
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Best-selling author Bryan Burrough recently made a shocking discovery: The small town of Temple, Texas, where he had grown up, had harbored a dark secret. One of his high school classmates, Danny Corwin, was a vicious serial killer. In this chilling tale, Burrough raises important questions of whether serial killers can be recognized before they kill or rehabilitated after they do. It is also a story of Texas politics and power that led the good citizens of the town of Temple to enable a demon who was their worst nightmare.
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Odd narration choice
- By Amanda Fredericks on 03-08-19
By: Bryan Burrough
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I Can't Make This Up
- Life Lessons
- By: Neil Strauss - contributor, Kevin Hart
- Narrated by: Kevin Hart
- Length: 11 hrs and 15 mins
- Unabridged
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Superstar comedian and Hollywood box-office star Kevin Hart turns his immense talent to the written word by writing some words. Some of those words include: the, a, for, above, and even even. Put them together and you have the funniest, most heartfelt, and most inspirational memoir on survival, success, and the importance of believing in yourself since Old Yeller.
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Best Audiobook I Ever Listened To
- By Sam Clear on 07-13-17
By: Neil Strauss - contributor, and others
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Genghis Khan and the Making of the Modern World
- By: Jack Weatherford
- Narrated by: Jonathan Davis, Jack Weatherford
- Length: 14 hrs and 20 mins
- Unabridged
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The Mongol army led by Genghis Khan subjugated more lands and people in 25 years than the Romans did in 400. In nearly every country the Mongols conquered, they brought an unprecedented rise in cultural communication, expanded trade, and a blossoming of civilization.
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Golden Horde/Platinum Listen
- By Cynthia on 12-11-13
By: Jack Weatherford
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Ali in Me
- By: Mercury Studios, Treefort Media
- Narrated by: Lonnie Ali, John Ramsey
- Length: 3 hrs and 31 mins
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Muhammad Ali, never afraid to express himself loudly and boldly, stays true to form in Ali in Me, an eight-part audio series that explores his life and legacy, guided by his own words through never-before-heard audio recordings. Hosted by Muhammad’s widow, Lonnie Ali, and his close friend, award-winning broadcaster John Ramsey, Ali in Me goes beyond the boxing ring to delve deeply into the extraordinary life and lasting contributions The Champ made to individuals around the world.
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He went hard on everything, especially love
- By 🔥 Phx17 🔥 on 01-31-25
By: Mercury Studios, and others
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The Autobiography of Malcolm X
- As Told to Alex Haley
- By: Malcolm X, Alex Haley
- Narrated by: Laurence Fishburne
- Length: 16 hrs and 52 mins
- Unabridged
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Experience a bold take on this classic autobiography as it’s performed by Oscar-nominated Laurence Fishburne. In this searing classic autobiography, originally published in 1965, Malcolm X, the Muslim leader, firebrand, and Black empowerment activist, tells the extraordinary story of his life and the growth of the Human Rights movement. His fascinating perspective on the lies and limitations of the American dream and the inherent racism in a society that denies its non-White citizens the opportunity to dream, gives extraordinary insight into the most urgent issues of our own time.
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it's Nearly perfect
- By Kerry on 09-16-20
By: Malcolm X, and others
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James Baldwin: The Man and His Work
- By: Rafael Walker, The Great Courses
- Narrated by: Rafael Walker
- Length: 2 hrs and 56 mins
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Artist. Public intellectual. Political activist. James Baldwin was all of these and more. Raised in the slums of Depression-era Harlem in New York City, Baldwin would become an author and activist of international renown—one whose legacy has continued long beyond his death in 1987. Who was James Baldwin? How did he become the master of multiple literary genres and a champion for some of the era’s most notable political and social causes? And how is his influence still being felt today?
By: Rafael Walker, and others
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Going Infinite
- The Rise and Fall of a New Tycoon
- By: Michael Lewis
- Narrated by: Michael Lewis
- Length: 9 hrs and 35 mins
- Unabridged
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When Michael Lewis first met him, Sam Bankman-Fried was the world’s youngest billionaire and crypto’s Gatsby. CEOs, celebrities, and leaders of small countries all vied for his time and cash after he catapulted, practically overnight, onto the Forbes billionaire list. Who was this rumpled guy in cargo shorts and limp white socks, whose eyes twitched across Zoom meetings as he played video games on the side?
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really expected more rigor from Michael Lewis
- By Wowhello on 10-04-23
By: Michael Lewis
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Weird Scenes Inside the Canyon
- Laurel Canyon, Covert Ops, and the Dark Heart of the Hippie Dream
- By: David McGowan
- Narrated by: Bill Fike
- Length: 14 hrs and 2 mins
- Unabridged
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The very strange but nevertheless true story of the dark underbelly of a 1960s hippie utopia. Laurel Canyon in the 1960s and early 1970s was a magical place where a dizzying array of musical artists congregated to create much of the music that provided the soundtrack to those turbulent times. But there was a dark side to that scene as well. Many didn't make it out alive, and many of those deaths remain shrouded in mystery to this day.
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My first review. This book changed me.
- By Robert on 06-30-19
By: David McGowan
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Burn, Baby, Burn
- The Life and Legacy of H Rap Brown
- By: Noor Wazwaz, Obaid Siddiqui
- Narrated by: Noor Wazwaz, Obaid Siddiqui
- Length: 2 hrs and 44 mins
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On a March night in 2000, two deputy sheriffs serving a warrant were shot in Atlanta, Georgia. One was severely wounded while the other would die a day later. The shooting kicked off a large manhunt in search of the alleged cop killer. Four days later in Alabama, authorities found their man—Jamil Al-Amin. He was a Muslim leader with the title of Imam in the West End neighborhood of Atlanta. He was also the man formerly known as H. Rap Brown. He was a charismatic Black radical in the late '60s.
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The historical audio footage took me back to the time of the story.
- By Valencia on 03-09-25
By: Noor Wazwaz, and others
What listeners say about Hell If We Don't Change Our Ways
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- LetDel
- 01-13-24
The most Beautiful, painful, real memoir I’ve read
This book was one of the most beautiful stories I’ve listened to in a long time. Brittany, thank you for sharing your story. You will help more people than you can ever imagine.
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- Katie Brinkley Holmes
- 02-04-24
Brave and powerful memoir!
This is a difficult story to hear, but worth it. The author is strong and resilient, but healing is clearly a journey. This was such a great reminder that compassion is always the right answer.
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- Ambar Gavidia
- 02-12-24
Read if you want to be more compassionate towards others…
Brittany’s story will infuriate you, but it will also shed light on what others may be going through at home. This memoir should be a must read for educators and anyone that works in the public sector.
Brittany, thank you for putting this out. As hard as it was to listen, it was necessary. You’re a rockstar
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- Traci
- 10-19-23
Heartbreaking and Heartwarming
Courageous with unflinching honesty. I couldn’t stop listening, except to pause, process, regroup and continue on. The more we know about trauma & generational trauma, the more we are able to understand its impact. Ms. Means is a gifted storyteller who narrates her story perfectly.
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- Amazon Customer
- 10-11-23
a story beautifully woven
This is my third time taking this incredibly engaging journey through Hell if We Don't Change Our Ways with Brittany. Brittany's ability to spin a tale of equal parts joy and trauma is unmatched. Her voice is clear, measured and soft as crushed velvet. My favorite book of all the reading/listening I've ever done. A solid investment of time. A once in a lifetime experience. You'll want to reread/listen to this more than once.
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