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While You Were Out
- An Intimate Family Portrait of Mental Illness in an Era of Silence
- Narrated by: Meg Kissinger
- Length: 11 hrs and 8 mins
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Publisher's summary
Long-listed, Barnes and Noble Best New Books of the Year 2023
From award-winning journalist Meg Kissinger, a searing memoir of a family besieged by mental illness, as well as an incisive exploration of the systems that failed them and a testament to the love that sustained them.
Growing up in the 1960s in the suburbs of Chicago, Meg Kissinger’s family seemed to live a charmed life. With eight kids and two loving parents, the Kissingers radiated a warm, boisterous energy. Whether they were spending summer days on the shores of Lake Michigan, barreling down the ski slopes, or navigating the trials of their Catholic school, the Kissingers always knew how to live large and play hard.
But behind closed doors, a harsher reality was unfolding—a heavily medicated mother hospitalized for anxiety and depression, a manic father prone to violence, and children in the throes of bipolar disorder and depression, two of whom would take their own lives. Through it all, the Kissingers faced the world with their signature dark humor and the unspoken family rule: never talk about it.
While You Were Out begins as the personal story of one family’s struggles then opens outward, as Kissinger details how childhood tragedy catalyzed a journalism career focused on exposing our country’s flawed mental health care. Combining the intimacy of memoir with the rigor of investigative reporting, the book explores the consequences of shame, the havoc of botched public policy, and the hope offered by new treatment strategies.
Powerful, candid and filled with surprising humor, this is the story of one family’s love and resilience in face of great loss.
A Macmillan Audio production from Celadon Books.
Critic reviews
"Meg Kissinger is a world-class reporter and a rip-roaring storyteller. Her heartfelt, eviscerating, deeply introspective investigation of long-held family secrets will leave you quaking with rage about our broken mental-health system—and grateful that writers like her are on the case."—Robert Kolker, #1 New York Times bestselling author of Hidden Valley Road
"As a journalist, Meg Kissinger has long been shining a light on our broken mental health care system by telling the stories of people struggling with mental illness. In While You Were Out, she tells the more personal and painful narrative of the people in her own family who have struggled with mental illness. A gifted storyteller, Kissinger reminds us, in the words of her deceased brother, 'Only love and understanding can conquer this disease.'"—Tom Insel, MD, Former Director of the National Institute of Mental Health
"Frank and revelatory, While You Were Out is a story of overwhelming power, chronicling the kind of American tragedy that feels both aberrant and ever-present."—Rachel Aviv, author of Strangers to Ourselves
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- Narrated by: Michael Lewis
- Length: 9 hrs and 35 mins
- Unabridged
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When Michael Lewis first met him, Sam Bankman-Fried was the world’s youngest billionaire and crypto’s Gatsby. CEOs, celebrities, and leaders of small countries all vied for his time and cash after he catapulted, practically overnight, onto the Forbes billionaire list. Who was this rumpled guy in cargo shorts and limp white socks, whose eyes twitched across Zoom meetings as he played video games on the side?
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really expected more rigor from Michael Lewis
- By Wowhello on 10-04-23
By: Michael Lewis
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Maybe You Should Talk to Someone
- A Therapist, HER Therapist, and Our Lives Revealed
- By: Lori Gottlieb
- Narrated by: Brittany Pressley
- Length: 14 hrs and 21 mins
- Unabridged
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One day, Lori Gottlieb is a therapist who helps patients in her Los Angeles practice. The next, a crisis causes her world to come crashing down. Enter Wendell, the quirky but seasoned therapist in whose office she suddenly lands. With his balding head, cardigan, and khakis, he seems to have come straight from Therapist Central Casting. Yet he will turn out to be anything but.
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It was like a hallmark movie being waterboarded into my ears for 15 hours
- By Amazon Customer on 10-01-19
By: Lori Gottlieb
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Cursed
- By: RAW
- Narrated by: Femi Oke
- Length: 5 hrs and 18 mins
- Unabridged
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On a cold December evening in 2016 a terrified young woman turns up at a brothel in Germany with a French passport but doesn’t speak a word of French. The owner is suspicious and alerts the German authorities, igniting a groundbreaking and history-making global investigation where ancient rituals collide with the modern world of crime fighting.
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A must listen
- By Lenandi on 09-20-24
By: RAW
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The Parole Room
- By: Ben Austen
- Narrated by: Ben Austen
- Length: 4 hrs and 25 mins
- Original Recording
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Will Johnnie Veal—convicted of the murder of two police officers in 1970—be granted parole after 50 years in prison? How can he convince the parole board he’s reformed when he insists he’s innocent? What is prison time even supposed to accomplish? These are the questions that propel The Parole Room forward as it builds toward Johnnie’s 20th parole hearing—after 19 rejections.
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Just… Excellent!
- By dom_a_j on 10-02-24
By: Ben Austen
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Reentry
- SpaceX, Elon Musk, and the Reusable Rockets That Launched a Second Space Age
- By: Eric Berger
- Narrated by: Rob Shapiro
- Length: 12 hrs and 59 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Story
From launchpad explosions to a pernicious cricket infestation to the demanding management style of Musk himself, the rise of SpaceX was beset with challenges and far from inevitable. Find out how the startup beat the odds and flew high enough to outpace their rivals... and where they're going next.
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Great book. Just as good as the first.
- By Tyler W. on 09-30-24
By: Eric Berger
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Genghis Khan and the Making of the Modern World
- By: Jack Weatherford
- Narrated by: Jonathan Davis, Jack Weatherford
- Length: 14 hrs and 20 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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The Mongol army led by Genghis Khan subjugated more lands and people in 25 years than the Romans did in 400. In nearly every country the Mongols conquered, they brought an unprecedented rise in cultural communication, expanded trade, and a blossoming of civilization.
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Golden Horde/Platinum Listen
- By Cynthia on 12-11-13
By: Jack Weatherford
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Finding Tamika
- By: Erika Alexander, Kevin Hart, Charlamagne Tha God, and others
- Narrated by: Erika Alexander
- Length: 5 hrs and 42 mins
- Original Recording
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Black girls and women disappear every day, but not without a trace. Join actress and activist Erika Alexander in a neo-noir, true crime drama as she searches for Tamika Huston, a 24-year-old Black woman from Spartanburg, SC who went missing in 2004. Her case became a rallying cry for other missing Black women in America and led to a growing demand to expose a system that ignores missing girls and women of color.
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Cynical conflation of two tragedies
- By Buretto on 03-26-22
By: Erika Alexander, and others
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The Book of Murder
- A Prosecutor's Journey Through Love and Death
- By: Matt Murphy
- Narrated by: Matt Murphy
- Length: 9 hrs and 59 mins
- Unabridged
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Examining murder from an insider’s perspective, Matt Murphy—a former senior deputy district attorney and current ABC News legal analyst—discusses cases from his career, how they strained his personal life, and how he found peace seeking justice for victims and their families. Part taxonomy of murder, part prosecutor’s handbook, and part personal memoir, The Book of Murder goes through a dozen cases and his recollections of his 26 years in the Orange County DA’s office (17 in the Homicide Unit).
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AMAZING!
- By Sandra Holt on 10-02-24
By: Matt Murphy
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How I Get It Done
- By: Shereen Marisol Meraji
- Narrated by: Shereen Marisol Meraji
- Length: 9 hrs and 53 mins
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In a series of deeply moving and inspiring conversations, host Shereen Marisol Meraji connects with successful women from all walks of life to reveal how they manage their careers and every aspect of their lives. Based on the long-running column from The Cut and New York Magazine.
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Relatable, helpful, and beautifully produced.
- By Anonymous User on 09-07-24
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The Demon Next Door
- By: Bryan Burrough
- Narrated by: Steve White
- Length: 2 hrs and 45 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Best-selling author Bryan Burrough recently made a shocking discovery: The small town of Temple, Texas, where he had grown up, had harbored a dark secret. One of his high school classmates, Danny Corwin, was a vicious serial killer. In this chilling tale, Burrough raises important questions of whether serial killers can be recognized before they kill or rehabilitated after they do. It is also a story of Texas politics and power that led the good citizens of the town of Temple to enable a demon who was their worst nightmare.
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Odd narration choice
- By Amanda Fredericks on 03-08-19
By: Bryan Burrough
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The Autobiography of Malcolm X
- As Told to Alex Haley
- By: Malcolm X, Alex Haley
- Narrated by: Laurence Fishburne
- Length: 16 hrs and 52 mins
- Unabridged
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Experience a bold take on this classic autobiography as it’s performed by Oscar-nominated Laurence Fishburne. In this searing classic autobiography, originally published in 1965, Malcolm X, the Muslim leader, firebrand, and Black empowerment activist, tells the extraordinary story of his life and the growth of the Human Rights movement. His fascinating perspective on the lies and limitations of the American dream and the inherent racism in a society that denies its non-White citizens the opportunity to dream, gives extraordinary insight into the most urgent issues of our own time.
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it's Nearly perfect
- By Kerry on 09-16-20
By: Malcolm X, and others
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Evil Has a Name
- The Untold Story of the Golden State Killer Investigation
- By: Paul Holes, Jim Clemente, Peter McDonnell
- Narrated by: Paul Holes, Jim Clemente
- Length: 6 hrs and 13 mins
- Original Recording
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For his victims, for their families and for the investigators tasked with finding him, the senselessness and brutality of the Golden State Killer's acts were matched only by the powerlessness they felt at failing to uncover his identity. Then, on April 24, 2018, authorities arrested 72-year-old Joseph James DeAngelo at his home in Citrus Heights, Calif., based on DNA evidence linked to the crimes. Amazingly, it seemed, evil finally had a name. Please note: This work contains descriptions of violent crime and sexual assault and may not be suitable for all listeners.
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Audible Raises The Bar On True Crime Genre
- By R. Squyres on 11-16-18
By: Paul Holes, and others
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The Girls of Atomic City
- The Untold Story of the Women Who Helped Win World War II
- By: Denise Kiernan
- Narrated by: Cassandra Campbell
- Length: 12 hrs and 51 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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At the height of World War II, Oak Ridge, Tennessee, was home to 75,000 residents, consuming more electricity than New York City. But to most of the world, the town did not exist. Thousands of civilians - many of them young women from small towns across the South - were recruited to this secret city, enticed by solid wages and the promise of war-ending work. Kept very much in the dark, few would ever guess the true nature of the tasks they performed each day in the hulking factories in the middle of the Appalachian Mountains.
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Important story of this secret city
- By CBlox on 11-14-13
By: Denise Kiernan
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Buying the paperback now too
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Roger and Penny Scaggs seemed a poster couple for family values. Evangelical Christians living in booming Austin, Texas, in the mid-1990s, they were respected leaders in their church and community. As Roger diligently worked his way up the high-tech corporate ladder, Penny kept a pristine home and coached similarly devout young women on how to be perfect wives. But on a windy March evening, this godly woman met the devil head-on.
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Misrepresentation
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"Prisons Make Us Safer"
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The United States incarcerates more of its residents than any other nation. Though home to five percent of the global population, the United States has nearly 25 percent of the world’s prisoners - a total of over two million people. This number continues to steadily rise. Over the past 40 years, the number of people behind bars in the United States has increased by 500 percent.
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Leftist propaganda
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Running Home
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For more than a decade, Katie Arnold chased adventure around the world, reporting on extreme athletes who performed outlandish feats - walking high lines 1,000 feet off the ground without a harness, or running 100 miles through the night. She wrote her stories by living them, until eventually life on the thin edge of risk began to seem normal. After she married, Katie and her husband vowed to raise their daughters to be adventurous, too, in the mountains and canyons of New Mexico. But when her father died of cancer, she was forced to confront her own mortality.
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Couldn't do it
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Strangers to Ourselves
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In a powerful and gripping debut, Rachel Aviv raises fundamental questions about how we understand ourselves in periods of crisis and distress. Drawing on deep, original reporting as well as unpublished journals and memoirs, Aviv writes about people who have come up against the limits of psychiatric explanations for who they are. Animated by a profound sense of empathy, Aviv’s exploration is refracted through her own account of living in a hospital ward at the age of six and meeting a fellow patient with whom her life runs parallel—until it no longer does.
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Just Falls Short ...
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Baby Love
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Like many women her age, 34-year-old Rebecca Walker was brought up to be skeptical of motherhood. As an adult she longed for a baby but feared losing her independence. In this very smart memoir, Walker explores some of the larger sociological trends of her generation while delivering her own story about the emotional and intellectual transformation that led her to motherhood.
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Not about decision making, but a nice pregnancy memoir
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What listeners say about While You Were Out
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- Dewey
- 10-12-23
The best lived experience memoir I have ever read
I read every book like this as I work with families struggling with mental illness. This is by far the most in depth account that so accurately describes the many levels of struggle. A must read for all loved ones!
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- Amazon Customer
- 03-18-24
I didn’t want it to end!
Meg Kissinger is a gifted writer, and her story is gripping, tragic and beautiful all at once.
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- kathy adams
- 12-16-23
Important Memoir!
One family’s personal journey through the struggles of mental illness. Meg is a tireless advocate for mental health using her experiences with her family and her investigative journalism skills to change the broken mental health “system”. I want to share this book with all of my family and friends!
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- Patricia Baker
- 10-04-23
Powerful and Important
Meg’s book was heartbreaking in parts and yet there was always hope. The power of sharing and talking and listening bring clarity and understanding. This will be an important resource in mental health care.
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- Damian Konopka
- 11-25-23
Wonderful addition to mental health writing
Excellent, sad, compelling and restorative stories. Invigorating and motivating for someone suffering from a mental illness.
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- Mayra L. Crespo
- 03-27-24
Meg took mental illness out of the shadows.
Fantastic uplifting book that details the reality of living with loved ones who have any type of mental illness. Despite the card they were dealt, it’s incredible how all six survivors made life work. Highly recommend this great story especially in today’s insane world.
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- PCT HIKER
- 11-19-23
Very interesting book.
This was a very good read. The book had my complete attention until the final chapters. They read more like a college lecture.. As a social worker, i've worked with many homeless people. It was heart-wrenching to go to work everyday and see people living in such squalor. Each person was different and factors leading to homelessness were complicated. it's more complex than simply finding housing. Thank you to the author for telling the story of her family and bringing insight into this human tragedy.
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- Melinda C. Henning
- 10-17-23
It’s so important that this family story has been told …
… in its entirety.
I didn’t know of Meg’s journalism which stimulated significant social change. I’m very grateful for that.
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- Molly
- 11-01-23
The Unshakable Love and Unbreakable Bond of Family
This memoir is one of the best I’ve ever had the honor to read. If you have members of your family who struggle with bipolar disorder, anxiety, depression, or other mental illness, this will resonate so fiercely with you too, but I also think it is important for everyone to read to better understand what that dynamic is truly about. I have such compassion and love for the Kissinger family. Their bond with one another is so special and it is a miracle for all they have been through, that they have made such beautiful families and lives of their own after such pain and sorrow. Thank you Meg for sharing this vulnerable and important story of your life.
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- Mary
- 12-16-23
A wonderful listen by the author herself! WOW
Loved every word! Exceptional read. An exceptional family true story saga. Perseverance, unconditional love and family strength.
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