It's Only Slow Food Until You Try to Eat It
Misadventures of a Suburban Hunter-Gatherer
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Narrated by:
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Bill Heavey
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By:
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Bill Heavey
About this listen
A longtime contributor to Field and Stream, Bill Heavey knew more than a little about hunting and fishing when he embarked on an ambitious project a few years ago to see how far he could get eating wild. But Heavey knew next to nothing about gardening or foraging, and he lives in northern Virginia, close to Washington, D.C. The rural wilds, this was not. Is it any surprise that his tasty triumphs were equaled by his hilarious misadventures?
With just the right dose of self-deprecation, Heavey tells the story of his quest, beginning locally and moving out from there. He digs up the ground behind his house and plants an elaborate garden only to be driven to squirrel murder (and a cover-up). He experiences abundance mania in the perch run on the Potomac, and again when he spots perfect wild mushrooms in Arlington National Cemetery. He forages for wild watercress, berries, and pawpaws within the beltway, and hunts crayfish in Louisiana and caribou on the Alaskan tundra.
With teachers that include Paula, a grizzled local so popular among DC fishers that she’s been called the Pablo Escobar of herring; Hue, a Bronze Star ex-military survival instructor and foraging expert; Michelle, a single mother unself-consciously devoted to eating local, and Jody, a weathered Cajun fisherman, Bill learns how to catch and cook frogs, prepare cattail pancakes, make salads out of garden weeds and bake a pie with foraged wild cherries.
To the delight of his readers and to his young daughter’s despair, Heavey also suffers serious blood loss, humiliation, and meals that are best described as edible. Entertaining and informative, this is Bill Heavey at his best...and worst.
©2013 Bill Heavey (P)2013 Audible, Inc.Listeners also enjoyed...
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Story
The stories in Kerplunk! travel the byways and highways of the Pacific Northwest, bringing to life offbeat, down-home characters who hope their grandchildren can pick the lock on the gun safe because they've forgotten the combination, who know exactly why it costs $500 to make a fly lure that retails for $2, and who aren't afraid to confront the problems of bird-dog flatulence.
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narrator nightmare
- By David on 12-09-07
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The Winemaker's Daughter
- By: Timothy Egan
- Narrated by: Cassandra Campbell
- Length: 12 hrs and 45 mins
- Unabridged
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When Brunella Cartolano visits her father on the family vineyard in the basin of the Cascade Mountains, she's shocked by the devastation caused by a four-year drought. Passionate about the Pacific Northwest ecology, Brunella, a cultural impact analyst, is embroiled in a battle to save the Seattle waterfront from redevelopment and to preserve a fisherman's livelihood. But when a tragedy among fire-jumpers results from a failure of the water supply - her brother Niccolo is among those lost - Brunella finds herself with another mission.
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Obviously Not Read By A Washington Resident
- By John C Schuyler on 04-24-19
By: Timothy Egan
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A Hunter's Fireside Book
- Tales of Dogs, Ducks, Birds, & Guns
- By: Gene Hill
- Narrated by: Ray Childs
- Length: 5 hrs and 6 mins
- Unabridged
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The legendary American outdoor writer’s finest collection. For decades, Gene Hill’s articles and books have captured the spirit of the outdoors in a way that inspires and entertains millions of readers. A Hunter’s Fireside Book captures the essence of the life of a sportsman and explores the full spectrum of the hunter’s experience: sunrises in the duck blind, an unforgettable hunter’s moon, the camaraderie of men who know the pleasures of being wet and cold and a little bit lost.
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Beyond acquiring meat, this is why we go afield
- By Ray C on 02-28-20
By: Gene Hill
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All Fishermen Are Liars
- By: John Gierach
- Narrated by: Mike Chamberlain
- Length: 6 hrs and 57 mins
- Unabridged
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In All Fishermen Are Liars, Gierach travels around North America seeking out quintessential fishing experiences, whether it's at a busy stream or a secluded lake hidden amid snow-capped mountains. He talks about the art of fly-tying and the quest for the perfect steelhead fly ("The Nuclear Option"), about fishing in the Presidential Pools previously fished by the elder George Bush, and the importance of traveling with like-minded companions when caught in a soaking rain.
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One Of My Favorite Authors!!!
- By Travis on 03-31-18
By: John Gierach
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The Grasshopper Trap
- By: Patrick McManus
- Narrated by: Norman Dietz
- Length: 6 hrs and 23 mins
- Unabridged
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Often compared to Garrison Keillor and Mark Twain, Patrick F. McManus maintains just the right balance between baffled innocence and conspiratorial confidence. Since 1979, this humorist has been delighting readers with hilarious stories recounting his childhood in rural Idaho and relating his misadventures in the great outdoors. Whether you're a sportsman or a couch potato, he will have you laughing out loud at his escapades.
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Classic Pat McManus
- By Elizabeth on 06-13-17
By: Patrick McManus
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Rubber Legs and White Tail-Hairs
- By: Patrick McManus
- Narrated by: Norman Dietz
- Length: 6 hrs and 9 mins
- Unabridged
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America's most hilarious sportsman returns with this collection of insights about youth, the great outdoors, and the philosophy of fileting fish. When best-selling author Patrick McManus looks at a subject, you're sure to come away with an outrageously new perspective.
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Laughed so hard I cried!
- By Kindle Customer on 04-05-12
By: Patrick McManus
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South Toward Home
- Adventures and Misadventures in My Native Land
- By: Julia Reed, Jon Meecham - foreword
- Narrated by: Julia Reed, Dan Bittner - introduction
- Length: 5 hrs and 20 mins
- Unabridged
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In thinking about her native land, Julia Reed quotes another Southern writer, Willie Morris, who said, “It’s the juxtapositions that get you down here.” These juxtapositions are, for Julia Reed, the soul of the South and in her warmhearted and funny new audiobook, South Toward Home, she chronicles her adventures through the highs and the lows of Southern life - the Delta hot tamale festival, a masked ball, a rollicking party in a boat on a sand bar, scary Christian billboards, and the southern affection for the lowly possum.
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Julia Reed IS the SOUTH
- By toni on 05-23-20
By: Julia Reed, and others
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Housebroken
- Admissions of an Untidy Life
- By: Laurie Notaro
- Narrated by: Laurie Notaro
- Length: 6 hrs and 12 mins
- Unabridged
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Number-one New York Times best-selling author Laurie Notaro isn't exactly a domestic goddess - unless that means she fully embraces her genetic hoarding predisposition, sneaks peeks at her husband's daily journal, or has made a list of the people she wants on her Apocalypse Survival team (her husband's not on it). Notaro chronicles her chronic misfortune in the domestic arts, including cooking, cleaning, and putting on Spanx while sweaty (which should technically qualify as an Olympic sport).
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Wonderful
- By Carlie on 07-28-16
By: Laurie Notaro
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The Midwest Survival Guide
- How We Talk, Love, Work, Drink, and Eat... Everything with Ranch
- By: Charlie Berens
- Narrated by: Charlie Berens
- Length: 6 hrs and 6 mins
- Unabridged
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Have you ever had a goodbye lasting more than four hours? Do you lack the emotional capacity to say “I love you” so you just tell your loved ones to “watch out for deer”? Have you apologized to a stranger because she stepped on your foot? If you answered yes to any of these questions, there’s a good chance you’re a Midwesterner - or a Midwesterner at heart.
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Perfect for the Long Drive to WI
- By Amazon Customer on 01-24-22
By: Charlie Berens
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The Way Life Should Be
- A Novel
- By: Christina Baker Kline
- Narrated by: Caitlin Davies
- Length: 7 hrs and 19 mins
- Unabridged
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Angela can feel the clock ticking. She is single in New York City, stuck in a job she doesn't want and a life that seems to have somehow just happened. She inherited a flair for Italian cooking from her grandmother, but she never seems to have the time for it - these days, her oven holds only sweaters. Tacked to her office bulletin board is a photo from a magazine of a tidy cottage on the coast of Maine - a charming reminder of a life that could be hers if she could only muster the courage to go after it.
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Simple story
- By Dianna Bogart on 06-09-15
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Racing the Rain
- A Novel
- By: John L. Parker Jr.
- Narrated by: Jim Meskimen
- Length: 10 hrs and 48 mins
- Unabridged
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Quenton Cassidy's first foot races are with nature itself: the summer storms that sweep through his subtropical neighborhood. Shirtless, barefoot, and brown as a berry, Cassidy is a skinny, mouthy kid with aspirations to be a great athlete. As he explores his primal surroundings along the Loxahatchee River and the nearby Atlantic Ocean, he is befriended by Trapper Nelson, "the Tarzan of the Loxahatchee", a well-known eccentric who lives off the land.
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I just finished reading it again!
- By Jonathan on 01-11-16
What listeners say about It's Only Slow Food Until You Try to Eat It
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Inez
- 05-06-21
SO MUCH MORE
I found this to be very educational and entertaining and I am the reader with the most negative thoughts and feelings
about killing, and hunting any living critter, there could be. But I did enjoy the descriptions of the various locations Bill Heavey traveled to, from the bayous of Louisiana to the Artic Village in northern Alaska. What trips, and his ease with the new people he encounters in the various locals.
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- Dave S
- 08-08-18
Long time fan.
I’ve enjoyed Heavey’s magazine writings for many years. Now that I’ve finally started on his books, I’m also enjoying this format (Audible) that allows me to enjoy Bill’s stories outside their native habitat (my bathroom library).
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- Michael
- 04-19-16
Really enjoyed this book
Can't say enough about bills books they are great for the outdoorsman. I highly recommend all of his books
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1 person found this helpful
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- Samuel Nelson
- 09-03-22
Not bad
I didn’t pay attention to the subtitle of this book. And found it much slower and very different than the other books I’ve listened to of Bill Heavey. With that being said still a great book of stories.
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- Amazon Customer
- 01-19-23
Content Matters
I really enjoyed this book. I’ve listened to quite a few of his works and love his writing style. After listening to multiple Epic Fantasy series with top notch narration this book’s narration (I believe the author himself) left me a little flat. Had to walk away a couple times. In the end, his narration style, like his writing style, won me over with its sincerity, humor, and at times vulnerability.
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- Scott
- 12-31-14
truly captivating.
bill is an amazing story teller. Not only do you feel like you're along side him, but you feel like you know him.
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- Justin Sylvia
- 12-06-22
1 Man’s Adventure In Living Outside Of His Comfort Zone
Now.. I’d like to start off by saying that, if the gentleman (Bill Heavey) is a well regard man who’s thought of as a hilarious/funny article writer to magazines & such, well then.. The humor apparently isn’t geared towards my “particular” taste in the genre of comedy. However, I did find certain articles of his insightful & thought provoking to an extent. For his example his experience with the San Fransisco “foodie crowd” which was at the time of his writing, a scavenger/forager vibe to it. Now a days that would be under the umbrella of Homesteading. I also did enjoy his time spent with his friend (?) Jody down in the bayous of Louisiana as he saw for himself how vast & expansive the swamps & basins can be. All in all I enjoyed the book for what it was, 1 man’s take & experience in learning & surviving off the land in different ways.
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- Austin Kelley
- 12-08-16
Not what I thought, but still loved it.
I immediately purchased and downloaded this book after finishing Heavey's If You Didn't Bring Jerky, What Did I Just Eat? That compilation of short stories instantly rose to my favorite reads. I was expecting more of the same with this book, however this was more of a connected journey with his foraging/foodie practices. I still enjoyed it, but it wasn't exactly what I was expecting.
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- Austin
- 12-09-20
The ending has a weight that can not be measured.
I loved this book. it is very different than another compilation of Bill's work. this pulls back the veil and let's you see a different side. The ending weighs on my mind as I prepare to feed my family, and I relate to the text.
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- Francois Coetzee
- 12-03-23
Beautiful read about hunting and gathering.
The author brings long lost hunting and gathering skills and diverse communities who still relies on such skills alive. Great listen!
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