Magical Crimes Audiobook By Chris Dolley cover art

Magical Crimes

Twenty-Four Inches from Tulsa

Preview
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About this listen

Magical Crimes is a fun CSI with magic and "a little something else" story. The little something else being two-foot-long and lurking in the hero’s trousers. But don’t worry, the penis in this story is used purely for the purpose God intended - humour and crimefighting - not lustful titillation.

Seb Kemp is a psychic profiler with a problem. After a night out drinking some men wake up with an unexpected tattoo. Seb woke up with a floor-length boinkwurst and no memory of how, when, or where it happened. To make matters worse, magic doesn’t work well with living tissue. The results are unpredictable. The spell might fade after a few days or...something might drop off. He needs help but, Pete, his forensic magician partner, is 3,000 miles away working on another case and Tulsa, Seb’s new partner, is of the young and female persuasion. Not to mention extremely hot. The two of them are thrown together to solve a high-profile locked-room mystery where the utmost tact and diplomacy is required - not easy for a man with unpredictable trousers. Magical Crimes is just over 13,000 words in length which equates to about 65 pages of a mass-market paperback.

©2010 Chris Dolley (P)2014 Audible Inc.
Classics Contemporary Fantasy Fiction Literature & Fiction Funny
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What listeners say about Magical Crimes

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  • 4 out of 5 stars
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Funny

Very well read and funny! Love the Euphemisms and well paced. Definitely worth a listen.

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    5 out of 5 stars
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Different Kind of Story

A big penis doesn't play a big part in the story, but pretty darn funny.

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  • Overall
    3 out of 5 stars
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    4 out of 5 stars

3.5 stars of a short, fun silliness.

If you are looking for something silly, and short to listen to and are not easily offended then give this book a listen. I was laughing at the end. The narrator did a decent job.

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3 people found this helpful

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    3 out of 5 stars
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    3 out of 5 stars

Part 2?

Knew it was a short book but the way it ended there has got to be a part 2?

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    5 out of 5 stars

outstanding

OMG! I LOVED IT! you obviously know what it's like to live my life 😂

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1 person found this helpful

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    3 out of 5 stars
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    4 out of 5 stars

Pulp and funny (mostly).

Kind of pubertal penis theme. It have some funny interesting ideas in worldbuiling, which have potential.

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    3 out of 5 stars
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    4 out of 5 stars
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    3 out of 5 stars

Two foot schlong because... why?!

In a world of mages, psychics and genies, Seb heads out on assignment with a sexy new CSI partner to investigate a mob-connected kidnapping. Oh, and he woke up with a two foot long schlong. Which provides for a series of bit gags. For free, this was easy, silly listening with some Benny Hill humor, some magical sleuthing, and some pretty good narration of mafia guidos. The mystery of how Seb got his impressive Johnson is solved too, in the last minute of the book.

Free of profanity and sex, but full of physical comedy starring an oversized Johnson.

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    2 out of 5 stars
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    3 out of 5 stars

I'm glad I didn't pay for this

if you're looking for a completely silly waste of time with a lot of dick talk, this might be for you.

it felt like a teenager had a dream about having a big dick and realized he better throw a story around it.

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1 person found this helpful