
Notes on a Silencing
A Memoir
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Narrated by:
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Lacy Crawford
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By:
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Lacy Crawford
A "powerful and scary and important and true" memoir of a young woman's struggle to regain her sense of self after trauma, and the efforts by a powerful New England boarding school to silence her—at any cost (Sally Mann, author of Hold Still).
Shortlisted for the 2022 William Saroyan International Prize for Writing
When Notes on a Silencing hit bookstores in the summer of 2020, even amidst a global pandemic, it sent shockwaves through the country. Not only did this intimate investigative memoir usher in a media storm of coverage, but it also prompted the elite St. Paul's School to issue a formal apology to the author, Lacy Crawford, for its handling of her report of sexual assault by two fellow students nearly thirty years ago.
In this searing book, Crawford tells the story of coming forward during the state investigation of the elite New England prep school decades after her assault, only to find for the first time evidence that corroborated her memories. Here were depictions of the naïve, hardworking girl she’d been, as well as astonishing proof of an institutional silencing. The slander, innuendo, and lack of adult concern that Crawford had experienced as a student hadn't been imagined; they were the actions of a school that prized its reputation above anything, even a child.
This revelation launched Crawford on an extraordinary inquiry deep into gender, privilege, and power, and the ways shame and guilt are used to silence victims. Insightful, arresting, and beautifully written, Notes on a Silencing wrestles with an essential question for our time: what telling of a survivor's story will finally force a remedy?
“Erudite and devastating… Crawford's writing is astonishing… Notes on a Silencing is a purposefully named, brutal and brilliant retort to the asinine question of 'Why now?'… The story is crafted with the precision of a thriller, with revelations that sent me reeling…”—Jessica Knoll, New York Times
A Best Book of the Year: Time, NPR, People, Real Simple, Marie Claire, The Lineup, LitHub, Library Journal, BookPage, and Shelf Awareness
A New York Times Book Review Notable Book
A New York Times Book Review Editors’ Choice
One of People Magazine’s 10 Best Books of the Year
Semifinalist for a Goodreads Choice Award
©2020 Lacy Crawford (P)2020 Hachette AudioListeners also enjoyed...




















Critic reviews
“Erudite and devastating… Notes on a Silencing is a purposefully named, brutal and brilliant retort to the asinine question of 'Why now?'… The story is crafted with the precision of a thriller, with revelations that sent me reeling… Crawford’s writing is astonishing.”—Jessica Knoll, New York Times
“A riveting, damning exploration of how a single moment can reshape an entire life… [and] a haunting exploration of the systematic ways assault victims are ignored… Crawford’s revelations about the insidious and systematic ways stories of assault are buried left me shaken, moved, angry. By the end, we all understand how rarely women are granted any kind of justice… Crawford does what the best memoirists do: She reaches beyond a single story… in its relentless exploration of power and hubris, Notes on a Silencing is a story that reminds us (because we apparently need reminding again and again) that women are still impotent against institutions and the men who run them… One cannot help but conjure the poised, careful testimony of Christine Blasey Ford and the sputtering, self-righteous rage of Brett M. Kavanaugh… a stunning, audacious attempt to reassert power over her own story.”—Rachel Louise Snyder, Washington Post
“The rigor and elegance of Crawford’s sentences, even while writing about such painful things, lifts this memoir into literary heights… Crawford lays bare the impact of violence on identity. She navigates her trauma surgically by trying to establish the parameters of its lexicon… with the help of therapy, detectives, records she thought lost to time, and a new case brought to the fore, Crawford is forcing the unchecked power of an elite institution to answer for their violations and the victims they shoved into silent hallways of despair.”—Kerri Arsenault, Boston Globe
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Well told and well read
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Lacy Crawford, you are amazing. I believe you, I see your pain and I honor you. Telling this story is going to resonate for a long long time and I hope you come to really know how much good you are doing for abused, both boys and girls, by the telling.
And... write us another book! And narrate it yourself. You are one talented broad!! lol.
PS: I'd love to hear the story of your mother and what brought her to her faith and life choices.
Lacy Crawford you are amazing!!
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Thank You For Your Courage
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Sad, but captivating and very important memoir.
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Absolute Must!!
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Devastating infuriating story, brilliant writer
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Thank you Lacy Crawford
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Sad story, well told
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Lacy Crawford is one of the few authors who relates her story with an emotional and yet factual perspective which draws the listener into the intimate drama of the events.
This is a "must listen" for anyone who has ever been assaulted/stigmatized/discriminated against as it delves into the mind of the victim without a feeling of pity rather of courage.
It is - in my opinion - recommended listening for all those who feel it "could never happen to them".
The outspoken starkness of a personal injustice
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There Are No Words
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