The Not-so-Innocents Abroad
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Narrated by:
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Robert Rossmann
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By:
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Roland Yeomans
About this listen
It is 1867 in an America a layer of existence from this one.
General Sherman was denied his march through Georgia by forces beyond his ken. Abraham Lincoln was never assassinated, though he wishes he had been killed instead of his beloved Mary. The battered Indian tribes of America have a strange refuge courtesy of the cursed Texas Ranger Captain Samuel McCord.
A global war of vampire kingdoms is going on beneath the noses of the living world - and it is interfering with the honeymoon of the alien empress Meilori Shinseen. She ruled the Aztecs when a political execution took place on Golgotha. Meilori commissioned the sphinx to take her mind off repairing her starcraft. The warring vampire rulers have mistaken her boredom with ruling the nations of man as weakness. They have made a grave error, emphasis on the word grave.
What is a not-quite-mortal groom to do? Survive as best he can.
Vampires, vengeful spirits of the earth, aliens among us, and a man with the blood of death in his veins trying to keep it from being spilled before his honeymoon is over. Come join the maiden voyage of the first air/steamship, the Xanadu, where murder, intrigue, and betrayal reign supreme...and that is just in the newlywed's bedroom.
Joining the newlyweds are Mark Twain, 11-year-old Nikola Tesla, his faithful black cat, Macak, Horace Greely, Ralph Waldo Emerson, Ada Byron, daughter of Lord Byron, and the mysterious Greek physician Lucanus.
Lurking in the shadows, hoping to kill them, is the insane Abraham Lincoln, the crippled General Sherman, the vampires, Abigail Adams and Benjamin Franklin, Empress Theodora, ruler of the Unholy Roman Empire, and the vengeful Captain Nemo, following in his nautilus.
Steampunk intrigue and adventure was never so much fun.
©2016 Roland Yeomans (P)2018 Roland YeomansListeners also enjoyed...
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Story
The Gods are dead. The Magelord Salazar and his magically enhanced troops, the Augmentors, crush any dissent they find in the minds of the populace. On the other side of the Broken Sea, the White Lady plots the liberation of Dorminia, with her spymistresses, the Pale Women. Demons and abominations plague the Highlands. The world is desperately in need of heroes. But what they get instead are a ragtag band of old warriors, a crippled Halfmage, two orphans and an oddly capable manservant: the Grim Company.
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Pretty bad, but not actively terrible
- By Travis Lamkin on 09-13-15
By: Luke Scull
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Way of the Argosi
- The Spellslinger Series, Book 0.5
- By: Sebastien de Castell
- Narrated by: Kristin Atherton
- Length: 11 hrs and 39 mins
- Unabridged
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Ferius Parfax has a simple plan: Kill every last inhabitant of the spell-gifted nation that destroyed her people, starting with the man who murdered her parents. Killing mages is a difficult and dangerous business, of course, but when she meets the inimitable and extraordinary Durrall Brown, she discovers that physical strength is not the only way to defeat evil of all kinds. So Ferius undertakes to study the ways of the Argosi: the loosely-knit tribe of tricksters known for getting the better of even the most powerful of spellcasters.
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Not what I expected
- By Mary Catherine on 12-03-21
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The Nate Temple Series: Books 0-3
- The Nate Temple Series Boxset Book 1
- By: Shayne Silvers
- Narrated by: Joel Richards
- Length: 41 hrs and 37 mins
- Unabridged
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My name is Nate Temple, and I’m secretly a wizard. I ride a foul-mouthed unicorn, I drink with Achilles, and I’m pals with the Four Horsemen. I’ve even cow-tipped the Minotaur. I understand the theory of following the rules...I’m just not very good at the application. Because rules were meant to be broken, and St. Louis has a bit of a supernatural infestation these days. Someone should probably be keeping an eye on these things -and probably an eye on me, too. Before I blow up another building...or three.
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Basically Batman with lizard brain
- By Ross Hageman on 04-01-20
By: Shayne Silvers
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My Big Fat Supernatural Honeymoon
- By: Rachel Caine, Kelly Armstrong, Jim Butcher
- Narrated by: Jay Snyder, Christian Rummel, Khristine Hvam, and others
- Length: 12 hrs and 16 mins
- Unabridged
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What newly married couple doesn't dream of a romantic retreat where they can escape the world for a while - but what happens when supernatural forces intrude on their wedded bliss? Nine of today's hottest paranormal authors answer that question in this all-star collection of supernatural stories.
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Delightful
- By Rbtmw on 08-10-09
By: Rachel Caine, and others
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Because You Love to Hate Me
- 13 Tales of Villainy
- By: Ameriie - editor
- Narrated by: Ameriie, Kevin T. Collins, Julia Whelan
- Length: 10 hrs and 32 mins
- Unabridged
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In this unique YA anthology, 13 acclaimed, best-selling authors team up with 13 influential BookTubers to reimagine fairy tales from the oft-misunderstood villains' points of view. These fractured, unconventional spins on classics like Medusa, Sherlock Holmes, and 'Jack and the Beanstalk' provide a behind-the-curtain look at villains' acts of vengeance, defiance, and rage - and the pain, heartbreak, and sorrow that spurned them on. No fairy tale will ever seem quite the same again!
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I enjoyed more than I expected
- By Doha on 08-30-17
By: Ameriie - editor
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Vampire Empire - The Greyfriar
- By: Clay Griffith, Susan Griffith
- Narrated by: James Marsters
- Length: 10 hrs and 39 mins
- Unabridged
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1870. A time known as The Great Killing. The vampire clans arose and slaughtered humanity with unprecedented carnage in the northern parts of the world. Millions perished; millions were turned into herd animals. The great industrialized civilizations of the world were left in ruin. A remnant fled south to the safety of the ever present heat which was intolerable to vampires. There, blending with the local peoples, they rebuilt their societies founded on human ingenuity, steam and iron.
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The Greyfriar Rocks!
- By Diana on 04-12-12
By: Clay Griffith, and others
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How Long 'Til Black Future Month?
- Stories
- By: N. K. Jemisin
- Narrated by: Shayna Small, Gail Nelson-Holgate, Robin Ray Eller, and others
- Length: 14 hrs and 10 mins
- Unabridged
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N. K. Jemisin is one of the most powerful and acclaimed speculative fiction authors of our time. In the first collection of her evocative short fiction, Jemisin equally challenges and delights listeners with thought-provoking narratives of destruction, rebirth, and redemption.
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Great! One quibble with the audiobook editing
- By L on 03-05-19
By: N. K. Jemisin
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Amber and Ashes
- Dragonlance: Dark Disciple, Book 1
- By: Margaret Weis
- Narrated by: Leslie Bellair
- Length: 9 hrs and 57 mins
- Unabridged
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The audio edition of the new novel from New York Times best-selling author Margaret Weis. The audio edition of the opening title in a new trilogy from Dragonlance setting co-creator Margaret Weis takes up where the War of Souls series left off with the central character, Mina. While following her story, this new trilogy also explores the chaos that is post-war Krynn. This is Weis’s first solo trilogy in the Dragonlance world.
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terrible narrator
- By Jacob on 04-23-16
By: Margaret Weis
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The Spirit Thief
- The Legend of Eli Monpress, Book 1
- By: Rachel Aaron
- Narrated by: Luke Daniels
- Length: 8 hrs and 19 mins
- Unabridged
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He's not just any thief. He’s the greatest thief of the age - and he’s also a wizard. And with the help of his partners - a swordsman with the most powerful magic sword in the world but no magical ability of his own, and a demonseed who can step through shadows and punch through walls - he’s going to put his plan into effect. The first step is to increase the size of the bounty on his head, so he’ll need to steal some big things. But he’ll start with somethingsmall. Something like a king....
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Entertaining light fantasy
- By Kindle Customer on 02-16-12
By: Rachel Aaron
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Pathfinder Tales: Shy Knives
- By: Sam Sykes
- Narrated by: Khristine Hvam
- Length: 9 hrs and 6 mins
- Unabridged
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Shaia "Shy" Ratani is a clever rogue who makes her living outside of strictly legal methods. While hiding out in the frontier city of Yanmass, she accepts a job solving a nobleman's murder, only to find herself sucked into a plot involving an invading centaur army that could see the whole city burned to the ground. Shy could stop that from happening, but doing so would involve revealing herself to the former friends who now want her dead.
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pretty good
- By chuck on 11-03-16
By: Sam Sykes
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William Wilde and the Necrosed
- By: Davis Ashura
- Narrated by: Nick Podehl
- Length: 8 hrs and 54 mins
- Unabridged
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On a cold winter's night, just shy of his 17th birthday, William Wilde became an orphan. It was a simple car accident that claimed the lives of his family. Eight months later, at the start of his senior year of high school, a beautiful, mysterious girl enters William's life. Captivating and confident, she holds secrets about William's heritage, secrets of which he himself is unaware: rare magic flows in William's veins.
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The magic of STRANGER THINGS and THE MAZE RUNNER
- By Audio Eficionado “I do at least 30 audiobooks a year” on 03-03-18
By: Davis Ashura
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Exquisite Captive
- Dark Caravan Cycle, Book 1
- By: Heather Demetrios
- Narrated by: Erin Mallon
- Length: 13 hrs and 43 mins
- Unabridged
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Jinni. Empress. Warrior. Slave. Nalia is a jinni of tremendous ancient power, the only survivor of a coup that killed nearly everyone she loved. Stuffed into a bottle and sold by a slave trader, she's now in hiding on the dark caravan, the lucrative jinni slave trade between Arjinna and Earth, where jinn are forced to grant wishes and obey their human masters' every command. She'd give almost anything to be free of the golden shackles that bind her to Malek, her cruel master, and his lavish Hollywood lifestyle.
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Interesting Story
- By Ess Bee on 11-09-14