Unmentionable
The Victorian Lady's Guide to Sex, Marriage, and Manners
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Narrated by:
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Betsy Foldes Meiman
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By:
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Therese Oneill
About this listen
Have you ever wished you could live in an earlier, more romantic era?
Ladies, welcome to the 19th century, where there's arsenic in your face cream, a pot of cold pee sits under your bed, and all of your underwear is crotchless. (Why? Shush, dear. A lady doesn't question.)
Unmentionable is your hilarious, scandalously honest (yet never crass) guide to the secrets of Victorian womanhood, giving you detailed advice on:
- What to wear
- Where to relieve yourself
- How to conceal your loathsome addiction to menstruating
- What to expect on your wedding night
- How to be the perfect Victorian wife
- Why masturbating will kill you
- And more
Irresistibly charming, laugh-out-loud funny, Unmentionable will inspire a whole new level of respect for Elizabeth Bennett, Scarlett O'Hara, Jane Eyre, and all of our great-great-grandmothers.
(And it just might leave you feeling ecstatically grateful to live in an age of pants, superabsorbency tampons, epidurals, antidepressants, and not dying of the syphilis your husband brought home.)
PLEASE NOTE: When you purchase this title, the accompanying reference material will be available in your My Library section along with the audio.
©2016 Therese Oneill (P)2016 Hachette AudioListeners also enjoyed...
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- A Guide for Knaves, Fools, Harlots, Cuckolds, Drunkards, Liars, Thieves, and Braggarts
- By: Ruth Goodman
- Narrated by: Jennifer M. Dixon
- Length: 10 hrs and 57 mins
- Unabridged
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Performance
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Every age and social strata has its bad eggs, rule-breakers, and nose-thumbers. As acclaimed popular historian and author of How to Be a Victorian Ruth Goodman reveals in her madcap chronicle, Elizabethan England was particularly rank with troublemakers, from snooty needlers who took aim with a cutting "thee" to lowbrow drunkards with revolting table manners. Goodman draws on advice manuals, court cases, and sermons to offer this colorfully crude portrait of offenses most foul.
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I learned a lot about cultural norms..even today's
- By Alanna R on 03-18-19
By: Ruth Goodman
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The Good Soldier
- By: Ford Madox Ford
- Narrated by: Frank Muller
- Length: 6 hrs and 56 mins
- Unabridged
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On the face of it Captain Edward Ashburnham's life was unimpeachable. But behind the mask where passion seethes, the captain's "good" life was rotting away.
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Treachery in the Troops
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By: Ford Madox Ford
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Herzog
- By: Saul Bellow
- Narrated by: Malcolm Hillgartner
- Length: 15 hrs and 36 mins
- Unabridged
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Winner of the National Book Award when it was first published in 1964, Herzog traces five days in the life of a failed academic whose wife has recently left him for his best friend. Through the device of letter writing, Herzog movingly portrays both the internal life of its eponymous hero and the complexity of modern consciousness.
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Grows Within You
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By: Saul Bellow
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Notes on Nursing
- What It Is and What It Isn't
- By: Florence Nightingale
- Narrated by: Elisabeth Rodgers
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- Unabridged
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These outspoken writings by the founder of modern nursing record fundamentals in the needs of the sick that must be provided in all nursing. Nightingale covers such timeless topics as ventilation, noise, food, bed and bedding, light, cleanliness, and observation of the sick.
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"old nurse" from California
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It Ended Badly
- Thirteen of the Worst Breakups in History
- By: Jennifer Wright
- Narrated by: Hillary Huber
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- Unabridged
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Spanning eras and cultures from ancient Rome to medieval England to 1950s Hollywood, Jennifer Wright's It Ended Badly guides you through the worst of the worst in historically bad breakups. In the throes of heartbreak, Emperor Nero had just about everyone he ever loved - from his old tutor to most of his friends - put to death. Oscar Wilde's lover, whom he went to jail for, abandoned him when faced with being cut off financially from his wealthy family.
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Shallow, poorly researched, forced humor
- By S. Yates on 05-11-17
By: Jennifer Wright
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The Posthumous Memoirs of Brás Cubas
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- Narrated by: Edoardo Camponeschi
- Length: 7 hrs and 11 mins
- Unabridged
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Joaquim Maria Machado de Assis (1839-1908) was the greatest writer ever to come from Brazil and one of the masters of nineteenth-century fiction. Susan Sontag calls him "the greatest writer ever produced in Latin America", surpassing even Borges. Harold Bloom says that Machado is "the supreme black literary artist to date". And Allen Ginsburg calls him "another Kafka". And The Posthumous Memoirs of Bras Cubas is his masterpiece, a dazzling, tragic, and profound novel that belongs next to the greatest works of his contemporaries Melville and Dostoevsky.
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A hidden masterpiece
- By C. Park on 08-09-18
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Conundrum
- By: Jan Morris
- Narrated by: Roy McMillan
- Length: 5 hrs and 12 mins
- Unabridged
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This remarkable memoir is the classic account of the transgender journey. It is all the more extraordinary because it is the life story of a figure who, it seemed, seamlessly and publicly charted a course through the English establishment - James Morris, outstanding journalist, historian and travel writer, famed for a peerless writing style. But all the while he was concealing a very different inner world: from the age of four he felt that, despite his body, he was really a girl.
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Beautiful memoir
- By Gabriel Smith on 07-25-22
By: Jan Morris
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Birth
- The Surprising History of How We Are Born
- By: Tina Cassidy
- Narrated by: Angela Starling
- Length: 9 hrs and 12 mins
- Unabridged
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From evolution to the epidural and beyond, Tina Cassidy presents an intelligent, enlightening, and impeccably researched cultural history of how and why we're born the way we are. Women have been giving birth for millennia, but that's about the only constant in the final stage of the great process that is human reproduction. Why is it that every culture and generation seems to have its own ideas about the best way to give birth?
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important historical work, fascinating and fun
- By RT on 02-24-16
By: Tina Cassidy
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At Home
- A Short History of Private Life
- By: Bill Bryson
- Narrated by: Bill Bryson
- Length: 16 hrs and 33 mins
- Unabridged
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Bill Bryson and his family live in a Victorian parsonage in a part of England where nothing of any great significance has happened since the Romans decamped. Yet one day, he began to consider how very little he knew about the ordinary things of life as he found it in that comfortable home. To remedy this, he formed the idea of journeying about his house from room to room to “write a history of the world without leaving home.”
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Bryson does it again
- By Robert on 10-15-10
By: Bill Bryson
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Time Enough for Love
- The Lives of Lazarus Long
- By: Robert A. Heinlein
- Narrated by: Tom Weiner
- Length: 23 hrs and 30 mins
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Time Enough for Love is the capstone and crowning achievement of Heinlein's famous Future History series. Lazarus Long is so in love with life that he simply refuses to die. Born in the early 1900s, he lives through multiple centuries, his love for time ultimately causing him to become his own ancestor. Time Enough for Loveis his lovingly detailed account of his journey through a vast and magnificent timescape of centuries and worlds. Using the voice of Lazarus, Heinlein expounds his own philosophies, including his radical ideas on sexual freedom.
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Age changes perspective
- By Candis on 08-27-16
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How to Behave Badly in Elizabethan England
- A Guide for Knaves, Fools, Harlots, Cuckolds, Drunkards, Liars, Thieves, and Braggarts
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Every age and social strata has its bad eggs, rule-breakers, and nose-thumbers. As acclaimed popular historian and author of How to Be a Victorian Ruth Goodman reveals in her madcap chronicle, Elizabethan England was particularly rank with troublemakers, from snooty needlers who took aim with a cutting "thee" to lowbrow drunkards with revolting table manners. Goodman draws on advice manuals, court cases, and sermons to offer this colorfully crude portrait of offenses most foul.
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I learned a lot about cultural norms..even today's
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Good information!
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Overall
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Every age and social strata has its bad eggs, rule-breakers, and nose-thumbers. As acclaimed popular historian and author of How to Be a Victorian Ruth Goodman reveals in her madcap chronicle, Elizabethan England was particularly rank with troublemakers, from snooty needlers who took aim with a cutting "thee" to lowbrow drunkards with revolting table manners. Goodman draws on advice manuals, court cases, and sermons to offer this colorfully crude portrait of offenses most foul.
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I learned a lot about cultural norms..even today's
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-
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Beware...this book is cursed! These strange but true stories of the world's most infamous items will appeal to true believers as well as history buffs, horror fans, and anyone who loves a good spine-tingling tale.
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What listeners say about Unmentionable
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Amanda T.
- 04-14-18
Wonderfully funny
I adored this book. It is so witty, so well read, full of fun and shocking facts any fan of the Victorian era will love.
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- Allyssia
- 05-14-18
Hard to enjoy but very well researched
It's filled with sarcastic comments and bitterness making it, most of the time, very hard to enjoy. I thought it would be a 19th century guide, and the criticism would be delivered in a more subtle way, but no. The author cannot deliver one single piece of information without mocking it, which turns out to be very annoying.
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- Anonymous User
- 07-30-24
Absolutely hilarious 😂
If you are looking for a deep dive, and nuanced account of womens lives during the Victorian era, this book is not it. If you are however looking for deep belly-laughs while also learning a bit more about the lives of your foremothers, then dive in. I could barely put this book down, the wording is poignant, personal and hilarious. I will forever more speak of my vagina as "the sacred vestibule".
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- J. Bell
- 04-08-18
Starts out entertaining, grows tiresome
I was hoping for something far more historical in nature, and while I did find some interesting facts at the beginning of the book, the latter half became tiresome and hateful. Sarcasm is an excellent spice, but makes a poor main course.
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14 people found this helpful
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- megan
- 08-07-18
Not the best
Not the best book, in the first couple chapters it mentions too much about bowel movements. Not exactly the humor that I was looking for....
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- Chelsea
- 08-21-18
Eww just be ready to think it
It I am referring to is all the Unmentionable information in the Victorian age that no one talked about during our favorite films and books.
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- astaiannymph
- 03-26-18
Couldn't put it down
Highly fascinating read. really delves into the day to day of wealthy women. I would have preferred a bit more of the other classes' lives. There's also a bit of a patronizing affectation by the narrator and text which is awkward. It's very clearly a deliberate and effective literary tool, but still awkward to listen to.
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- Brianna
- 12-06-16
Entertaining and informative
A well-researched exploration of women's life and health in the Victorian era that definitively de-romanticizes the time period. Topics covered included dress, marriage, masturbation, and menstruation, among others. The witty quips from the author to the reader, however, did become somewhat annoying - at some point I was more interested in the subject than the author's snarky commentary. Overall, would recommend this funny and informative read.
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- Daddy of Twins
- 04-20-18
Funny and Informative
I now know more than I need or necessarily (in some cases) wanted to know about the private lives of Victorian Women! The narrators were engaging and the content was interesting! Good read!
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- Amazon Customer
- 07-25-24
very funny and learned a lot
Very well written and researched. if you ever wanted to know what it would really be like to live as a Victorian woman, this is the book. The fact she acknowledges what you know in the present and how it differs from that time period is great, and done in a humorous tone. I love this author.
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