Will My Cat Eat My Eyeballs?
Big Questions from Tiny Mortals
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Narrated by:
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Caitlin Doughty
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By:
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Caitlin Doughty
About this listen
Best-selling author and mortician Caitlin Doughty answers real questions from kids about death, dead bodies, and decomposition.
Every day, funeral director Caitlin Doughty receives dozens of questions about death. The best questions come from kids. What would happen to an astronaut’s body if it were pushed out of a space shuttle? Do people poop when they die? Can Grandma have a Viking funeral?
In Will My Cat Eat My Eyeballs?, Doughty blends her mortician’s knowledge of the body and the intriguing history behind common misconceptions about corpses to offer factual, hilarious, and candid answers to 35 distinctive questions posed by her youngest fans. In her inimitable voice, Doughty details lore and science of what happens to, and inside, our bodies after we die. Why do corpses groan? What causes bodies to turn colors during decomposition? And why do hair and nails appear longer after death? Listeners will learn the best soil for mummifying your body, whether you can preserve your best friend’s skull as a keepsake, and what happens when you die on a plane.
Beautifully illustrated by Dianné Ruz, Will My Cat Eat My Eyeballs? shows us that death is science and art, and only by asking questions can we begin to embrace it.
©2019 Caitlin Doughty (P)2019 Recorded BooksListen in as Caitlin Doughty answers questions about death.
Featured Article: A Future Corpse's Guide to Death Acceptance
Confronting death does not necessitate a spiral into despondency. Instead we may come a realization that, in acknowledging and accepting this fate, we paradoxically lead fuller and more emotionally present lives. In this list, scholars, physicians, journalists, philosophers, and death professionals share their stories, perspectives, and advice, offering a glimpse into how we can prepare for the end with grace, heart, and humor.
Editor's Pick
"I adore Will My Cat Eat My Eyeballs?, and want to make it mandatory listening for anyone who wonders if kids are too young to be exposed to the concept of death. Author Caitlin Doughty shows how healthy and natural it is for young people to be curious about death, and that it doesn’t have to be sad or scary. As one of the world’s most renowned funeral directors, she gets asked a lot of questions on the topic, and it’s always the kids who ask the weirdest and most wonderful ones. In Will My Cat Eat My Eyeballs?, she sets out to answer some of them—from "Can I keep my parents’ skulls after they die?" to "What would happen if you swallowed a bag of popcorn before you died and were cremated?". Dressed up as an entertaining romp through an offbeat subculture—and yes, Doughty’s pitch perfect narration is hugely entertaining!—it’s secretly a guide for how to become more comfortable with something we’ll all inevitably have to face one day 💀." —Rachel S., Audible Editor
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A wonderful read!
- By Grace Adele Spruiell on 12-25-22
By: Todd Harra, and others
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Stiff
- The Curious Lives of Human Cadavers
- By: Mary Roach
- Narrated by: Shelly Frasier
- Length: 8 hrs
- Unabridged
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For two thousand years, cadavers have been involved in science's boldest strides and weirdest undertakings. They've tested France's first guillotines, ridden the NASA Space Shuttle, been crucified in a Parisian laboratory to test the authenticity of the Shroud of Turin, and helped solve the mystery of TWA Flight 800. For every new surgical procedure, from heart transplants to gender reassignment surgery, cadavers have been there alongside surgeons, making history in their quiet way.
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I worked with cadavers for years, but....
- By POQA on 11-11-12
By: Mary Roach
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Over Our Dead Bodies
- Undertakers Lift the Lid
- By: Todd Harra, Kenneth McKenzie
- Narrated by: Reay Kaplan, Gregory St. John, Brian Troxell
- Length: 7 hrs and 5 mins
- Unabridged
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From a dysfunctional family who turn their mother's wake into a full-blown riot, to funeral crashers looking for free meals, to a horse-drawn hearse taking the dearly departed for the ride of their afterlife, these accounts from actual undertakers will have you laughing, thinking, and gasping in disbelief. A literal graveyard of wild coincidences, slapstick humor, and touching moments, Over Our Dead Bodies explores the lighter side of the dead, the living, and the lone undertaker who has to make it all go as planned - even if it doesn't.
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New perspective on death
- By Chris Bates on 12-06-24
By: Todd Harra, and others
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¿El gato se comerá mis ojos? [Will My Cat Eat My Eyeballs?]
- Y otras preguntas sobre cadavers [Big Questions from Tiny Mortals About Death]
- By: Caitlin Doughty
- Narrated by: Pilar Corral
- Length: 4 hrs and 56 mins
- Unabridged
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Cada día, la directora de funerarias Caitlin Doughty recibe docenas de preguntas sobre la muerte. Las mejores son las de los niños. ¿Qué le pasaría al cuerpo de un astronauta si lo empujaran desde un transbordador espacial? ¿Se hace caca al morir? ¿Puede la abuela celebrar un funeral vikingo? En "¿Se comerá mi gato mis ojos?", Doughty combina sus conocimientos funerarios sobre el cuerpo y la intrigante historia que se esconde tras las ideas erróneas más comunes sobre los cadáveres para ofrecer respuestas objetivas, divertidas y sinceras.
By: Caitlin Doughty
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Gulp
- Adventures on the Alimentary Canal
- By: Mary Roach
- Narrated by: Emily Woo Zeller
- Length: 8 hrs and 21 mins
- Unabridged
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Best-selling author Mary Roach returns with a new adventure to the invisible realm we carry around inside. Roach takes us down the hatch on an unforgettable tour. The alimentary canal is classic Mary Roach terrain: The questions explored in Gulp are as taboo, in their way, as the cadavers in Stiff and every bit as surreal as the universe of zero gravity explored in Packing for Mars. Why is crunchy food so appealing? Why is it so hard to find words for flavors and smells? Why doesn’t the stomach digest itself? How much can you eat before your stomach bursts?
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Funtastic Voyage
- By Mel on 04-05-13
By: Mary Roach
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All That Remains
- A Renowned Forensic Scientist on Death, Mortality, and Solving Crimes
- By: Sue Black
- Narrated by: Angela Dawe
- Length: 10 hrs and 22 mins
- Unabridged
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Dame Sue Black is an internationally renowned forensic anthropologist and human anatomist. She has lived her life eye to eye with the Grim Reaper, and she writes vividly about it in this book, which is part primer on the basics of identifying human remains, part frank memoir of a woman whose first paying job as a schoolgirl was to apprentice in a butcher shop, and part no-nonsense but deeply humane introduction to the reality of death in our lives. It is a treat for CSI junkies, murder mystery and thriller fans, and anyone seeking a clear-eyed guide to a subject that touches us all.
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I wanted a science book about forensics. I got a mostly-memoir instead.
- By A Customer on 11-29-19
By: Sue Black
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I Don't Need Therapy
- (And Other Lies I've Told Myself)
- By: Toni Lodge
- Narrated by: Toni Lodge
- Length: 5 hrs and 34 mins
- Unabridged
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Like most of us, Toni Lodge tells little white lies all the time. Whether it's "I'm five minutes away" or "It must have gone to my spam folder", most of these innocent fibs are harmless. But what if you realised that you weren't just lying about the little things, but the big "life" stuff too? When Toni sat down to write this memoir, she realized that the lies she was telling herself were hiding some pretty important home truths—about her work, her identity and her mental health. In her dogged pursuit of these truths, she brazenly explores everything.
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I laughed, I cried
- By caroline on 12-12-23
By: Toni Lodge
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People I Want to Punch in the Throat
- Competitive Crafters, Drop-Off Despots, and Other Suburban Scourges
- By: Jen Mann
- Narrated by: Jen Mann
- Length: 5 hrs and 39 mins
- Unabridged
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Jen Mann doesn't have a filter, which sometimes gets her in trouble with her neighbors, fellow PTA moms, and that one woman who tried to sell her sex toys at a home shopping party. Known for her hilariously acerbic observations on her blog, People I Want to Punch in the Throat, Mann now brings her sharp wit to bear on suburban life, marriage, and motherhood in this laugh-out-loud collection of essays. From the politics of joining a play group, to the thrill of moms' night out at the gun range, to the rewards of your most meaningful relationship, nothing's sacred or off-limits.
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Boring, not funny, and kind of mean
- By Jess on 11-22-19
By: Jen Mann
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Never Suck a Dead Man's Hand
- Curious Adventures of a CSI
- By: Dana Kollmann
- Narrated by: Kate Zane
- Length: 9 hrs and 43 mins
- Unabridged
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Step past the flashing lights into the true scene of the crime with this frank, unflinching, and unforgettable account of life as a crime scene investigator. Whether explaining rigor mortis or the art of fingerprinting a stiff corpse on the side of the road, Dana Kollmann details her true, unvarnished experiences as a CSI for the Baltimore County Police Department.
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Overall great
- By Jennifer Guffey on 05-28-21
By: Dana Kollmann
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Dead Men Do Tell Tales
- The Strange and Fascinating Cases of a Forensic Anthropologist
- By: William R. Maples PhD, Michael Browning
- Narrated by: Stephen Bel Davies
- Length: 11 hrs and 27 mins
- Unabridged
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From a skeleton, a skull, or a mere fragment of burnt thighbone, prominent forensic anthropologist Dr. William Maples can deduce the age, gender, and ethnicity of a murder victim, the manner in which the person was dispatched, and, ultimately, the identity of the killer. In Dead Men Do Tell Tales, Dr. Maples revisits his strangest, most interesting, and most horrific investigations, from the baffling cases of conquistador Francisco Pizarro and Vietnam MIAs to the mysterious deaths of President Zachary Taylor and the family of Czar Nicholas II.
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Recommended book
- By Amazon Customer on 10-30-17
By: William R. Maples PhD, and others
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All the Living and the Dead
- From Embalmers to Executioners, an Exploration of the People Who Have Made Death Their Life's Work
- By: Hayley Campbell
- Narrated by: Hayley Campbell
- Length: 8 hrs and 57 mins
- Unabridged
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Fueled by a childhood fascination with death, journalist Hayley Campbell searches for answers in the people who make a living by working with the dead. Along the way, she encounters mass fatality investigators, embalmers, and a former executioner who is responsible for ending sixty-two lives. She meets gravediggers who have already dug their own graves, visits a cryonics facility in Michigan, goes for late-night Chinese with a homicide detective, and questions a man whose job it is to make crime scenes disappear.
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Excellent
- By Noelle on 09-01-22
By: Hayley Campbell
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The Royal Art of Poison
- Filthy Palaces, Fatal Cosmetics, Deadly Medicine, and Murder Most Foul
- By: Eleanor Herman
- Narrated by: Susie Berneis
- Length: 10 hrs and 31 mins
- Unabridged
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The story of poison is the story of power. For centuries, royal families have feared the gut-roiling, vomit-inducing agony of a little something added to their food or wine by an enemy. To avoid poison, they depended on tasters, unicorn horns, and antidotes tested on condemned prisoners. Servants licked the royal family's spoons, tried on their underpants, and tested their chamber pots. Ironically, royals terrified of poison were unknowingly poisoning themselves daily with their cosmetics, medications, and filthy living conditions.
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Relieved and surprised
- By Amber on 09-28-18
By: Eleanor Herman
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I Can Barely Take Care of Myself
- Tales from a Happy Life Without Kids
- By: Jen Kirkman
- Narrated by: Jen Kirkman
- Length: 6 hrs and 20 mins
- Unabridged
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"You'll change your mind." That's what everyone says to Jen Kirkman - and countless women like her - when she confesses she doesn't plan to have children. But you know what? It's hard enough to be an adult. You have to dress yourself and pay bills and remember to buy birthday gifts. You have to drive and get annual physicals and tip for good service. Some adults take on the added burden of caring for a tiny human being with no language skills or bladder control.
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Funny. Not fall down laughing funny, but funny
- By david on 05-22-13
By: Jen Kirkman
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Gory Details
- By: Erika Engelhaupt
- Narrated by: Mari Weiss
- Length: 8 hrs and 33 mins
- Unabridged
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Filled to the brim with far-out facts, this wickedly informative narrative from the author of National Geographic's popular Gory Details blog takes us on a fascinating journey through an astonishing new reality. Blending humor and journalism in the tradition of Mary Roach, acclaimed science reporter Erika Engelhaupt investigates the gross, strange, and morbid absurdities of our bodies and our universe.
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Feels like old school Discovery channel
- By Anonymous User on 02-15-23
By: Erika Engelhaupt
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The Neuroscientist Who Lost Her Mind
- My Tale of Madness and Recovery
- By: Barbara K. Lipska, Elaine McArdle - contributor
- Narrated by: Emma Powell
- Length: 6 hrs and 54 mins
- Unabridged
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In 2015, Barbara Lipska - a leading expert on the neuroscience of mental illness - was diagnosed with melanoma that had spread to her brain. Within months, her frontal lobe, the seat of cognition, began shutting down. She descended into madness, exhibiting dementia- and schizophrenia-like symptoms that terrified her family and coworkers. But miraculously, the immunotherapy her doctors had prescribed worked quickly. Just eight weeks after her nightmare began, Lipska returned to normal. With one difference: she remembered her brush with madness with exquisite clarity.
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Be Prepared To Feel Insane--
- By Gillian on 04-11-18
By: Barbara K. Lipska, and others
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And Then You're Dead
- What Really Happens If You Get Swallowed by a Whale, Are Shot from a Cannon, or Go Barreling over Niagara
- By: Cody Cassidy, Paul Doherty
- Narrated by: Dennis Boutsikaris
- Length: 4 hrs and 59 mins
- Unabridged
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A gleefully gruesome look at the actual science behind the most outlandish, cartoonish, and impossible deaths you can imagine. What would happen if you took a swim outside a deep-sea submarine wearing only a swimsuit? How long could you last if you stood on the surface of the sun? How far could you actually get in digging a hole to China? Paul Doherty, senior staff scientist at San Francisco's famed Exploratorium Museum, and writer Cody Cassidy explore the real science behind these and other fantastical scenarios.
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perfect for a precocious 9 year old boy
- By Kerith Strano Taylor on 05-15-17
By: Cody Cassidy, and others
What listeners say about Will My Cat Eat My Eyeballs?
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- NikkiCoolJoe
- 10-24-19
Caitlin Never Dissapoints!
Another humorous look at the facts from our favorite mortician! Too much stigma surrounds the reality of death and it needs to be cleared away. You will come across some information you already know, especially if you have read her other two books; however this is definitely worth the listen! Many more new facts, and myth busts await!
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22 people found this helpful
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- Adele S.
- 02-06-20
I am a Deathling.
I originally found this author through her Ask A Mortician YouTube channel and I have liked her voice from the first word I heard. Death is her niche & she speaks about it with a knowledge, curiosity & respect that is comforting & very interesting. I highly recommend her books, videos & narrations.
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3 people found this helpful
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- Amazon Customer
- 11-20-19
Engaging,Interesting,Surprising, and Factual
Even though the premise was answering children's questions.....it wasn't done in a patronizing or childlike way. The delivery was given in a straightforward, factual, and scientific way that makes it interesting for anyone who likes to learn new things. The narration made it an even more enjoyable listen to because it was enthusiastic and passionate. Overall it was very enjoyable.
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2 people found this helpful
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- mary
- 09-12-19
Hail Caitlin
This is a perfect, funny, informative book for anyone. not just kids. Every question is treated with due respect.
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1 person found this helpful
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- Kabrina Campbell
- 10-04-19
so glad I got this!
honestly it answered alot of my own questions! thank you so much for putting this on audible!
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1 person found this helpful
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- Chad
- 01-22-20
Loves this book to death!!
Such a good book and an Interesting listen!
If your into mummy’s death and interesting fun facts this book is for you!!
Also Caitlin doughty could read me the dictionary and I’d love it her voice is calming and playful but also smart sounding all at the same time!!
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1 person found this helpful
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- KB
- 12-26-19
Mystery solved!
The topic of death and all that it entails is a touchy subject to discuss publicly in western society. I appreciate her willingness and candor to answer questions about death, the death industry, death planning options, and the surviving loved ones' rights. This short book takes that conversation to another level and answers a few questions grown ups are too hesitant to ask but sure are thinking. I will die knowing the answer to the question on the cover of her book. You will, too, if you read it.
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- Amazon Customer
- 09-16-19
Another informative, charming, and thought provoking account from Doughty! Love it!!
This is a great addition to any library and is suitable for kids young or older as well as adults (but be prepared to have an awkward conversation or two with little ones)! Caitlyn Doughty answers the questions from her young fans with honesty and humor (where appropriate). Nothing is infantilized or sugar-coated. Who knew talking about death, corpses, and decomposition could be so fun! Her audiobook narration is better than ever as she does voices, dramatic reading, and even sings (I won’t spoil my favorite moment, you’ll just have to listen yourself!). As always, Doughty makes learning about the most difficult topics fun without glossing over the cold hard facts we’re all secretly DYING to know! Can’t wait for her next one!!
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- Richard Johnson
- 08-20-20
Morbidly Delightful
What can I say? Caitlin is able to tackle real questions from real kids... but also things we as adults are afraid to ask.
A great teaching tool on becoming death aware and, while we never really want it to happen, this book helps view the great unknown in a more illuminated aspect.
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- Watashi Machine
- 11-24-20
Loved it!
Long time fan of Caitlin's - absolutely loved this book! Especially pleased that Caitlin read the audiobook herself - her narration is charming and energetic the whole way through. great listen~
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