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To my listeners, I want to share something real--from the heart. I had so much passion in my past, a deep desire to love and be loved, to build something meaningful. I gave my all, even when it meant letting go of my own identity--my family. I was willing to make sacrifices for love, for commitment. But looking back, I also carry regrets. Regrets for silencing my own voice. Regret for dimming my light to make someone else feel comfortable. I lost parts of myself trying to hold it all together. Now, I speak not just from experience, but from a place of healing--because I know I'm not alone. If you've ever given too much and felt like it still wasn't enough, I see you. I've been you. And we're still standing.

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Life has a way of shifting, sometimes in ways we don't expect. The tide started changing for me when I found myself juggling so much--motherhood, work, and the uncertainty of home life. There were moments I don't know if my husband would still have a job, if rent would get paid, or even if he'd have a new girlfriend. But in the middle of that storm, a breath of fresh air came through a friend--someone who lived just two buildings away. Spending time with her and her daughter gave me an outlet, a space where I could relax, laugh, and feel some ease. And then, there were the moments with my son--going to the mall, having fun at Six Flags. Those times reminded me that even when life felt uncertain, joy still existed. The tide was shifting, not because everything got easier, but because I found little moments of relief. And sometimes, that's all we need to keep going.

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Let's talk about one of those moments when life felt like it was finally coming--together--only for the past to come knocking. Everything was going well, and then my ex-resurfaced. He came back, not just with words but with a ring, a proposal, and a promise of a fresh start. And I said yes. Before I knew it, I had packed up my life and moved to Maryland, stepping into a new role--not just as a wife, but as a mom and a stepmom. I was trying to adjust, trying to make it all work. But just like before, the cracks started to show. There were other women. There were other issues. And yet, life was life. I told myself to push through, to focus on the good, to build something stable in the chaos. But here's the thing--when you ignore the truth, when you try to hold together something that was broken from the start, the weight of it all catches up to you. And it did. I learned that no matter how much you want something to work, it takes two people fully committed, fully honest, and fully present. And that wasn't the case. I'll dive deeper into what happened next, but I want you to sit with this--how often do we convince ourselves that things are okay just because we don't want to start over again? How often do we settle for what feels familiar instead of what we truly deserve?

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When I moved back to 1505, the house was full of life--people everywhere, laugher, and the kind of warmth only home can bring. My granny, known for her famous Eastern Star card games, was always in the kitchen cooking up some soul food that would have you licking your fingers. My uncle, an executive chef who had traveled the world, brought his culinary skills home, whipping up dishes like rockfish and pie with meat--which I later learned was actually quiche.

I cherished the simple moments, like walking down to Mt. Pleasant Library with my son and nephew, then stopping by Heller's Bakery for cupcakes. Christmas time was always magical-ice skating, movies, and my granny's legendary holiday dinners that brought everyone together. But just as life was settling into this beautiful rhythm, my ex reappeared, apologies in hand, promising change. This time, I took a chance, and we moved to Maryland--Kirkwood--a new chapter, but the past never too far behind.

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I want to take y'all back to where it all started. My ex-husband and I grew up on the same block--our moms grew up together, and the whole neighborhood felt like home sweet home. It was the kind of place where everybody knew each other, where childhood memories were made.

Years later, while I was working at the jail, we crossed paths again. But this time, something was different. The way he looked at me wasn't the same as when we were kids. That look turned into something more, and before I knew it, we started dating. I moved in with him on U Street, NW and life was good--for a while.

Then came the other women. And when they came, I left. I moved back to 1505, trying to pick up the pieces. But he came back, apologized and I gave him another chance. And another. And another. This cycle went on for years--me leaving, him coming back, me believing things would change.

It took me years to finally break free, to overcome the hold that cycle had on me. But I want y'all to know that healing is possible. It's not easy, and it doesn't happen overnight, but one day, you wake up and realize you're done repeating the same story. And that's when real freedom begins.

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Imagine hearing your name whispering softly, enticingly: "Renee, Come Out to Play... " The streets had a way of calling my name, pulling me back into their darkness, making promises they never intended to keep. Each time I returned, the price was heavier, the scars deeper. I found myself pregnant again-this time, nearing losing my life through an ectopic pregnancy. In that painful moment, I knew enough was enough. I looked into my son's eyes and promised him--and myself--that I'd never let the streets call me back again.

Email: info@creepin2preachin.com

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Ladies I want to share a moment I call my "All Hail to the Jail" experience. Yes, it's raw, but it's real. During one of the toughest periods in my life, I found myself gaining invaluable skills of the next leg of my journey. Despite how difficult and challenging my supervisor made things for me, I refused to be defined by his harsh treatment. I stayed determined, earned a promotion, and ultimately gained skills that shaped my future.

I share this because life isn't always neat or easy. Sometimes we face unfair situations and challenging people, yet those very experiences can equip us with unexpected strength and lessons.

Now, I want to hear from you--have you faced a similar crossroads? How did it shape you? Share your story with me. Let's grow together through our truths.

Email: info@creepin2preachin.com

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In this episode, Not Dressed for This Mess, I'm sharing the story of my last confrontation with my ex--the final straw that showed me just how much I've grown. I wasn't prepared for the drama, but I was more than ready to shut it down and walk away with my peace intact. It was a reminder that not every battle deserves our energy, and sometimes the strongest move is knowing when to let go. Now I want to hear from you. I'm inviting listeners to come on the podcast and share their own experience--those moments that tested you, broke you, but ultimately helped you grow. Let's build this community together, one story at a time, because your truth can be the light someone else needs.

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