Heather Gatson is a mama of two beautiful children who I crossed paths with during her 2nd postpartum period.
Our conversations on motherhood have left me speechless and empowered a multitude of times. The depth of her vulnerability is painted through the beauty of her words as she describes showing up for herself during some the darkest days a mama could possibly have.
It is an absolute honor to share our conversation for more mamas to hear and know that, without a doubt, they are not alone...and that there is an "after this," but first is admitting that "I am not okay."
Conversation summary:
The Four Points:
The STEPS
The Healing Process
Community & Language
After This
1. Reflecting on her postpartum experience, there were definitely STEPS that were significant.
First admission was:
“I am not okay."
“It’s okay to say that I’m not okay.”
Learning to check-in on MYSELF “I’m not well today.”
“I’m better but still recovering.”
2. The Healing Process:
Highlighting the necessary elements to heal properly to wholeness. Some wounds heal but they can be infected or there may be a deformity afterwards. “Time heals ALL wounds” if the only element you have is time, you will not heal to wholeness and be healthy I. Your next season. Healing is a process that involves a variable of elements that collaborate together to produce healing. Time alone does not possess healing properties. Although time and patience are essential’s components.
3. Community & Language
The importance of support, community and help before and after the birth. Highlighting preventative measures and available resources. Surrounding yourself with people who understand where you are. Who speak the language of postpartum fluently. Who can give direction, support, encouragement and the gift of presence. To dispel the internal lie that you are alone and failing. To speak a narrative of life and hope and offer a macro perspective.
4. After This
That although this season is real there is an after this. It’s important to know and remember as you journey through this valley that there is an after this. There are beautiful and perfect days that you have not even considered. There are relationships and opportunities that you can not even conceive. There is a joy and a love that will return but the focus has to be on the present but let “there is an after this” echo and offer hope.
Don’t die Mother.
Don’t give up.
Press forward and you do not have to do it alone.
There is a community of women who want to connect and rally around you.
You do have to show up.
You do have to do the work daily, but YOU are not alone.
You matter.
You are not forgotten.
You are seen, heard and cared for.
Don’t just survive postpartum Arise and Thrive.
The first step is admission “I am not okay”.