🎧 PONDOFF’S ANONYMOUS – EPISODE 11

Guest: Alex Kaiser | Host of No Lions Here Podcast
🎧 https://www.nolionshere.com/

WHO’S THIS EPISODE FOR?

• The morbidly curious
• Anyone whose secrets are getting heavy
• Partners of sex addicts who want answers
• Folks untangling faith, shame, and identity
• People craving unfiltered recovery talk

EPISODE HIGHLIGHTS:

Chris, Jeff, and Jakob dive in with Alex Kaiser, a man who’s walked through hell and come back with a mic. From childhood trauma to sex addiction, locker room benders to emotional sobriety—this one hits hard.

• 🎧 Alex’s podcast: No Lions Here – https://www.nolionshere.com/
• 💔 Trauma, shame, and the roots of sexual addiction
• 🧠 The Feeling Wheel—emotional sobriety 101
• 🏒 Hockey, blow, and bottoming out in a garage with a glory hole
• 🚫 What sexual sobriety actually means
• 🔥 Why he’s speaking up now—and who it’s for

TIMESTAMPS:

• [00:00] – Bertarelli Cutlery shoutout
• [01:36] – Finger-fucking the mic setup
• [04:00] – Meet Alex: recovering sex addict
• [06:00] – Love addiction & early shame
• [10:11] – Sobriety defined: no porn, no apps, no hookups
• [20:11] – Childhood abuse, church trauma
• [28:15] – Feeling Wheel and emotional sobriety
• [34:55] – Naming emotions, dealing with disappointment
• [37:24] – Arousal templates, secrets, and shame
• [48:27] – Benders, broken trust, and the turning point
• [57:03] – Begin Again Institute: where he got help
• [1:18:00] – Disclosing to a new partner
• [2:00:00] – If you’re struggling, email Alex: nolionshere@gmail.com

LISTEN TO ALEX’S PODCAST:

🦁 No Lions Here – Raw stories of recovery and real connection
🎧 https://www.nolionshere.com/

FINAL TAKE:

Two hours of raw truth, no filter. Alex proves that healing’s possible—even after the kind of shit no one wants to admit out loud.

RESOURCES & LINKS:

• 🎡 Feeling Wheel: https://feelingswheel.com/
• 📧 Email Alex: nolionshere@gmail.com
• 🏥 Begin Again Institute: https://beginagaininstitute.com/
• 🎙️ No Lions Here Podcast: https://www.nolionshere.com/

💥 SPONSORS:

• 🔪 Bertarelli Cutlery – https://bertarellico.com
• 🏥 Illinois Recovery Center – https://illinoisrecoverycenter.com

Back by popular demand (and because we promised), we’re throwing it back to an episode that still slaps five years later. Megan Gehrs sat down with Chris and poured out a jaw-dropping story of addiction, destruction, and one hell of a comeback. From sneaking booze in Catholic school basements to being wheelchair-bound with alcoholic neuropathy, Megan takes us on a brutal, hilarious, and brutally honest ride.

But don’t get it twisted—this isn’t a sob story. It’s a story of survival, faith, and the kind of redemption arc that makes Hollywood scripts look soft.

In this one, we cover:

• 🍻 How Belleville turned weekend benders into lifestyle choices
• 🚫 Why DUIs and losing her license didn’t slow her down—but losing the feeling in her legs did
• 🛏️ Drinking vodka out of water bottles in a hospital bed (yeah… it gets there)
• 🔥 Hitting her spiritual bottom and finally getting her life back
• 🙌 Finding purpose in service and saving lives through lived experience
• 💪 What real recovery looks like—and why Megan’s still out here doing the damn thing

Megan didn’t just get sober. She got loud. And now she’s helping others do the same, one raw truth at a time.

This episode is loaded with laughter, tears, and more Belle-Vegas debauchery than we care to admit. If you missed it the first time (shame on you), don’t miss it now.

📅 Originally recorded FIVE YEARS AGO. And it still bangs.

📺 YouTube version (with the most views in show history): Watch here

Let us pray.

Who It’s For

• The introvert who thinks they can't recover in a loud-ass world
• Anyone clinging to the idea of "high-functioning" addiction
• Parents who think “we raised them right” means addiction-proof
• The one white-knuckling sobriety and thinking it’ll magically stay that way
• Folks who think jail and liver failure are just someone else’s problem—until they’re not

Megan Gehrs is back to defend her YouTube crown, and she brought backup: the fierce, funny, and fearless Bree Badgley. What starts as a roast-fest quickly turns into a raw, riveting convo about what it really takes to crawl out of addiction — and why surviving doesn’t mean staying silent.

We talk childhood trauma, drinking vodka from Sprite bottles, Zoom recovery, liver failure, “terminal uniqueness,” prison visits, and the miracle of showing up for life — even when it’s hard as hell.

Bree gets real about trying to white-knuckle her way to sobriety, the self-loathing of secret drinking, and finally surrendering to something bigger. Megan opens up about hitting literal liver failure and still thinking, “I’ve got this.” Spoiler: she didn’t — but she does now.

🔪 Brutally honest. 🤣 Surprisingly funny.
🙏 Spiritually grounding.
This one’s a damn heater.

🕰 TIMESTAMPS

• 00:00 – Welcome back, Megan & meet Bree Badgley
• 05:50 – Bree’s story: “perfect” family, still an alcoholic
• 08:30 – Catholic guilt, introvert hell, and the terminal uniqueness trap
• 16:00 – Megan’s sobriety inspired Bree (even if Bree ghosted her at first)
• 20:30 – Getting sober during COVID (yes, really)
• 27:00 – IOP, living at home, isolation, & the Zoom detox
• 34:00 – Making amends to her sister: “I was a jerk”
• 36:00 – Megan’s liver says “nope,” and the wake-up call
• 41:00 – Bree joins Megan’s homegroup and hates it (at first)
• 43:00 – Finding God in pancakes & basement meetings
• 47:00 – Spirituality, introverts, and group therapy for the win
• 51:00 – Fireball, yet lists, & prison visits that haunt you
• 58:00 – The power of being seen & surrendering the fight
• 1:03:00 – Cliff at Friday’s & the people who never make it out
• 1:05:00 – “I didn’t get in trouble… but I should’ve.”
• 1:07:00 – Recovery, honesty, and learning to live with yourself

This episode’s for the quiet ones, the ones who “don’t look like” addicts, and anyone who ever told themselves I’m fine. You’re not alone. You never were.

🔥 Powered by our day-ones:
🛏️ Illinois Recovery Center – https://illinoisrecoverycenter.com/
🔪 Bertarelli Cutlery – https://bertarellico.com/

Let’s f’ing go.

This week, Chris, Jeff, and Jakob throw down on some heavy hitters: grief, addiction, childhood trauma, and what it really takes to get your shit together in recovery. No fluff, no fake inspiration—just real talk from guys who’ve lived it.

Chris opens up about a brutal personal loss and how it shook his sobriety to the core. The crew doesn’t sugarcoat it—grief will mess with your head, especially when you’re trying to stay clean. They break down why grieving your old life is part of the process and how pretending you’re “fine” only makes things worse.

They hit hard on childhood trauma, accountability, and the difference between just not drinking and actually recovering. Spoiler: one is survival, the other is transformation.

Relationships? Still complicated as hell in sobriety. But with humility, self-reflection, and a crew that calls you on your bullshit, it gets manageable. The guys remind us that asking for help isn’t weakness—it’s the strongest move you can make. And when you start showing up for others? That’s where the real magic happens.

This one’s about sitting in the suck, owning your story, and crawling toward growth—one honest step at a time.

Takeaways

• Chris shares a gut-punch story of loss and how it shook up his recovery.
• Grief isn’t just about people—it’s also about losing the chaos you once called “normal.”
• Childhood trauma has receipts. Time to face it.
• There’s no healing without humility. Own your shit.
• Sobriety and recovery? Not the same thing.
• Accountability means letting people into the mess.
• Self-pity is a trap. Grieve, then move.
• Gratitude isn’t corny—it’s fuel.
• The scariest things to do are usually the most important.
• Asking for help is gangster.
• Service keeps you out of your own head.
• You don’t do this alone. Ever.

Sponsors

Illinois Recovery Center – Where real healing starts.

Bertarelli Cutlery – Sharpen your damn knives. And your life.

So here’s the deal—Chris kicked off this episode saying Jeff’s out ‘cause his kid’s on spring break. Cute story, totally false. Jeff’s actually home while his wife’s doing parent-teacher conferences, because unlike some people, he listens. I guess you can tell who writes these show notes now…

With Jeff out, our guy Eric Conley slides back into the studio alongside Chris and Jakob for a special FAQ episode—where we cut through the fluff and tackle the questions people in and out of recovery are really asking.

We’re talking about what rehab actually looks like (spoiler: it ain’t a vacation—it’s school, and you’re the subject), why medically assisted treatment (MAT) saves lives, and why sober living isn’t just a halfway house—it’s where accountability gets real.

The guys also dig into how active addiction reduces you to survival mode—animal level living—and how even making your bed in the morning can feel like a goddamn victory. We’ve had some heavy-hitting guests lately, and we take a minute to reflect on that weight and why those conversations matter.

Plus:

• What to expect from outpatient programs (aka “real life with a safety net”)
• Why swapping one addiction for another is a sneaky trap
• The fine line between harm reduction and moderation
• Adderall, social media, and other modern landmines
• Why talking to your kids about addiction early matters more than you think

This one’s not just about staying sober—it’s about building a life that makes sense sober. From lifestyle changes to real accountability, from support groups to self-love, it’s all on the table. Let’s get into it.

Support the ones who support us:

• Illinois Recovery Center – They don’t play around when it comes to getting clean.
• Bertarelli Cutlery – Blades so sharp, they’ll cut through your denial.

⚠️ TRIGGER WARNING: This episode discusses suicide, cyberbullying, and mental health struggles.

If these topics are difficult for you, please listen with care. If you or someone you know is struggling, help is available—don’t hesitate to reach out.

This one’s a tough conversation, but it’s one that needs to be had. We sit down with Tina Meier, the unstoppable force behind the Megan Meier Foundation, a foundation born from tragedy after the unthinkable happened to her daughter, Megan. At just 13 years old, Megan took her own life after being the target of a cruel and calculated cyberbullying scheme, and what followed was a gut-wrenching battle for justice, awareness, and change.

Tina walks us through the unimaginable grief of losing a child, the frustrating fight to find mental health resources, and the hidden dangers of social media that most parents don’t see until it’s too late. We dig into the psychological toll of bullying, the ugly reality of teenage friendships, and the vicious cycle of self-medication and depression that too many people fall into. The legal system wasn’t built for tragedies like Megan’s, and Tina breaks down the infuriating loopholes that left her family searching for accountability.

But this isn’t just about loss—it’s about turning pain into purpose. Out of the darkest chapter of her life, Tina built a foundation to educate, support, and fight for kids and families who are struggling with the same nightmare. We talk about what needs to change, why spring is often the hardest time for students dealing with bullying, and how asking for help can be the hardest but most important thing anyone can do.

This episode hits hard, but it matters. Cyberbullying isn’t some distant issue—it’s happening right now, and the consequences are very real. If you’re a parent, a teacher, or just someone who gives a damn about the next generation, listen up. It’s time to start having the tough conversations before it’s too late.

Resources

• 🔗 Megan Meier Foundation

Shoutout to Our Sponsors

• 💉 Illinois Recovery Center
• 🔪 Bertarelli Cutlery

This one stays with you. Listen, learn, and let’s do better.

Pondoff's Anonymous - Recovery, Relapse, and Real Talk with Eric Conley

Chris, Jakob, and Jeff sit down with Eric Conley, CEO of Illinois Recovery Center, for a no-BS deep dive into addiction, recovery, and the brutal reality of getting clean. If you're looking for sugarcoated platitudes, go somewhere else—this one’s raw, real, and straight from the trenches.

🔥 Recovery is a journey—support and community make all the difference.
🔥 The pain of addiction has to hit a breaking point before change happens.
🔥 Empathy isn’t optional—it’s a key ingredient in the recovery process.
🔥 Nutrition and wellness play a huge role in getting and staying clean.
🔥 Personal stories of struggle aren’t just stories—they inspire real hope.
🔥 Building a strong team is everything in the world of treatment.
🔥 Relapse happens, but it can be a lesson instead of a setback.
🔥 Listening and being open to advice can be the difference between failure and success.
🔥 A safe, nurturing environment is crucial for true healing.
🔥 The fear of losing a job keeps too many people from seeking help.
🔥 Addiction is an exhausting cycle that keeps people trapped.
🔥 Holidays can be a trigger—family gatherings bring people to the breaking point.
🔥 Scholarships open doors for those who desperately need treatment.
🔥 Recovery requires a real financial commitment—but it’s worth it.
🔥 Gratitude is tough to cultivate in active addiction, but it’s a game-changer.
🔥 Humiliation can be the moment that sparks change.
🔥 Tough love is sometimes the only way to push someone into treatment.
🔥 Addiction warps judgment—it takes a support system to break through.
🔥 Family and friends are lifelines in the recovery process.
🔥 Every employee at Illinois Recovery Center knows every client’s name—because community matters.
🔥 Respect is non-negotiable—you treat the team right, they fight for you.
🔥 “I will die on this sword”—Eric is all in for every client’s success.
🔥 Recovery is 100% possible—if you’re willing to do the work.
🔥 That breaking point—day three of withdrawal—is where the real fight begins.
🔥 Recovery means surrendering the wheel—you’re not running the show anymore.
🔥 Learning doesn’t happen where you sleep—transparency and accountability matter.
🔥 The right environment feels like home, not a hospital.
🔥 Trust is built through honesty, care, and community support.
🔥 Sharing stories isn’t just talk—it’s a lifeline for others looking for hope.
🔥 Overcoming stigma is crucial—acceptance starts with conversation.
🔥 Love, relationships, and transformation can thrive in recovery.
🔥 Hope is a weapon—wield it wisely.

Eric and the crew don’t pull punches in this one. If you or someone you love is struggling, listen up. You might hear exactly what you need to finally make a change.

💉 Illinois Recovery Center – If you or someone you know needs help, check them out: illinoisrecoverycenter.com
🔪 Bertarelli Cutlery – Keeping blades sharp and kitchens dangerous: bertarellico.com

Subscribe, share, and stay anonymous. Or don’t. Just don’t keep suffering in silence. 🤘

What’s Inside?Shoutout to Our Sponsors

Jakob was MIA, playing nurse for his sick girlfriend, so Chris and Jeff held it down.

But don’t worry, this episode still packs a punch.

Guest: Cristina Preston

Ministry Leader at Celebrate Recovery at Connect Church in Fenton, MO. But don’t let the “ministry leader” title fool you—this ain't some holier-than-thou sermon. Cristina's been through the trenches: heroin, crack, drug dealing, debts, and even surviving sex trafficking. Rock bottom wasn’t just a place; it was her reality. But she clawed her way back and now helps others do the same.

Topics Covered:

• The loneliness and shame that fuel addiction
• How childhood trauma shapes mental health
• The insane journey from prescription meds to heroin
• What happens when you completely lose control—and how to get it back
• The grind of the fitness industry, and how self-worth gets twisted
• Finding love, navigating blended families, and why forgiveness is a damn superpower

Cristina’s Message:

Your past does NOT define you. You’ve got a purpose, and your worst moments can be the key to helping someone else.

For more on

Celebrate Recovery

https://www.connectchurchstl.com/celebraterecovery

Shoutout to Our Sponsors:

• 🔪 Bertarelli Cutlery – Keeping your blades sharper than your mother-in-law’s tongue. BertarelliCo.com
• 🏥 Illinois Recovery Center – If you’re struggling, get help. No BS, just real recovery. IllinoisRecoveryCenter.com