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A Trip to the Hardware Store & Other Calamities
- Quirky Essays for Quirky People
- Narrated by: Carrie Lee Martz
- Length: 55 mins
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Publisher's summary
At 8,000 words, this collection of humorous essays explores such quirky topics as: disastrous home repairs, ("A Trip to the Hardware Store"), an unfortunate dinner party ("Dinner is Served"), the truth about lazy people ("Lazy Bones"), the weird life of a debt collector ("Your Account is Past Due") and obsessions with gadgets ("Gadget Girl"). Other essays examine how surreal the aging process is ("Where Did the Time Go?"), why you shouldn't judge a person by their job ("Beyond Belief"), and how to complicate simple transactions ("High Finance"). Like the author's first work, "I'm Not Talking About You, Of Course...," these essays will give your spirit a lift and leave you smiling.
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Meg Corey has come to the quaint New England town of Granford, Massachusetts, to sell her mother's old colonial home and apple orchard. Instead, she becomes embroiled in development plans that include her land - and her former flame from Boston. When he's found dead in the new septic tank on her property, the police immediately suspect Meg, whose only ally in town is the plumber Seth Chapin. Together, they'll have to peel back the layers of secrecy that surround the deal in order to find the real murderer.
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Very slow mystery-wise, narrator okay
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Isle of Palms
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- By: Dorothea Benton Frank
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- Length: 18 hrs and 4 mins
- Unabridged
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Dorothea Benton Frank is a treasure of American letters with numerous New York Times best-sellers to her credit and a portfolio full of critical acclaim. “Mixing high drama and high jinks” ( Booklist), her third Lowcountry novel follows the fortunes of the dysfunctional Abbot family. Looking to set her life aright, Anna Lutz Abbot returns to her South Carolina lowcountry hometown. And as she attempts to right past wrongs, Anna receives help and support from a quirky cast of lovable locals sure to endear themselves to listeners.
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A feel good story
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Stories I'd Tell in Bars
- By: Jen Lancaster
- Narrated by: Jen Lancaster, John Fletcher
- Length: 8 hrs and 27 mins
- Unabridged
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Unfiltered. Unapologetic. Older, but not wiser, Lancaster goes back to basics in this hilarious essay collection about everything from taking community policing classes to accidentally getting high with her waiter after a fancy dinner. These are the tales she'd tell if she met you in a bar... if she weren't too lazy to put on pants and go to a bar. Offering advice ranging from how to remain happily married to a man who refuses to blow his damn nose already to not creating An Incident at the cheese counter during an attempt at Whole30, she's you, only louder.
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self absorbed
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By: Jen Lancaster
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I Just Want You to Know
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- By: Kate Gosselin
- Narrated by: Kate Gosselin
- Length: 3 hrs and 39 mins
- Unabridged
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In I Just Want You to Know, New York Times best-selling author Kate Gosselin continues her story of faith and family, picking up where her first book, Multiple Blessings, ended. Using excerpts and written prayers from her actual journal, Kate offers an intimate look at the heart of a mother during the three years her family transitioned from obscurity into television fame.
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This was a good book
- By lisa m schumann on 01-03-22
By: Kate Gosselin
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May We Be Forgiven
- By: A. M. Homes
- Narrated by: Andy Paris
- Length: 20 hrs and 43 mins
- Unabridged
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May We Be Forgiven, a darkly comic novel of 21st-century domestic life, stars Harold Silver, a historian who's always been jealous of his successful brother, George. But when the hot-tempered George is institutionalized for committing a violent act, Harold finds himself comforting his brother's wife and children. What follows is a scathing examination of a family so fractured it may never be whole again.
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Give this one a try!
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Liar, Liar
- The Theory, Practice and Destructive Properties of Deception
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- Length: 2 hrs and 15 mins
- Unabridged
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Kevin has a big talent. Some might call it compulsive lying. He calls it common sense. Kev doesn’t mean to cause trouble by lying all the time; he’s just trying to make everything easier for everyone (and himself). And, of course, a few harmless, um, falsehoods are crucial to his plan to convince Tina that he’s the perfect boyfriend for her. In Gary Paulsen’s irresistible and chaotic comedy, Kevin’s lies spiral out of control until he’s faced with the need to do the unthinkable: tell the truth.
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Mindless entertainment
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Gummi Bears Should Not Be Organic
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- Unabridged
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In this latest mommy audiobook from the popular blogger, author, and TV personality, Stefanie will share her secrets for achieving a balance in motherhood between being protective and caring and downright bats--t crazy. She'll debunk some of the looniest parenting myths and reinforce others; she'll describe how, through as simple a process as good old trial and error, she's learned to pick and choose what works for her and her family, and tune out the rest.
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You’re A Parent Now...Don't Mess It Up
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Out of Line
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- Unabridged
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Out of Line describes Lynch's remarkable process of self-invention, including her encounters with colorful characters of the food world, and vividly evokes the magic of creation in the kitchen. It is also a love letter to South Boston and its vanishing culture, governed by Irish Catholic mothers and its own code of honor. Through her story, Lynch explores how the past - both what we strive to escape from and what we remain true to - can strengthen and expand who we are.
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Hardheaded, arrogant, profane.
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Housebroken
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- Unabridged
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Number-one New York Times best-selling author Laurie Notaro isn't exactly a domestic goddess - unless that means she fully embraces her genetic hoarding predisposition, sneaks peeks at her husband's daily journal, or has made a list of the people she wants on her Apocalypse Survival team (her husband's not on it). Notaro chronicles her chronic misfortune in the domestic arts, including cooking, cleaning, and putting on Spanx while sweaty (which should technically qualify as an Olympic sport).
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Wonderful
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Working as a Las Vegas concierge, Brianna Mannion is an expert at making other people’s wishes come true. It’s satisfying work, but a visit home to scenic Honeymoon Harbor turns into a permanent stay when she’s reminded of everything she’s missing: the idyllic small-town charm; the old Victorian house she’d always coveted; and Seth Harper, her best friend’s widower and the neighborhood boy she once crushed on - hard. After years spent serving others, maybe Brianna’s finally ready to chase dreams of her own.
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Fair
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Goodbye, Vitamin
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Freshly disengaged from her fiancé and feeling that life has not turned out quite the way she planned, 30-year-old Ruth quits her job, leaves town, and arrives at her parents' home to find that situation more complicated than she'd realized. Her father, a prominent history professor, is losing his memory and is only erratically lucid. Ruth's mother, meanwhile, is lucidly erratic.
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Hello Sweet Sweet Book
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What listeners say about A Trip to the Hardware Store & Other Calamities
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- erobbins33
- 12-26-14
Wonderful!
If you could sum up A Trip to the Hardware Store & Other Calamities in three words, what would they be?
Fun, calamitous, truth
What was one of the most memorable moments of A Trip to the Hardware Store & Other Calamities?
The matter of the "slight" remodeling necessary in the Trip to The Hardware Store... Understatement of the year!
Which scene was your favorite?
The dining room re flooring...
Was this a book you wanted to listen to all in one sitting?
I did listen all in one sitting. We had a long car trip, and managed to finish it.
Any additional comments?
This was a commpendium of wonderful short stories, which were hilarious and believable. I think, based on some things I've read, that these are based on real life occurrences for the author. The narrator, Carrie Lee Martz, is once again phenomenal and wickedly versatile. Each story had it's own 'voice'. She is a tremendously talented lady!
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- Dawn H
- 05-29-14
Funny!
Would you recommend this audiobook to a friend? If so, why?
Yes, it's funny.
What about Carrie Lee Martz’s performance did you like?
I've heard two of her performances and she does a good job.
Any additional comments?
I received a free copy of the audiobook for an honest review.
This book has several funny stories in which the author pokes fun at herself and members of her family but the stories are ones we can all relate to. When I listen to an audiobook, I listen in my car on my commute to work. I found myself laughing often as I drove.
My favorite story was “A Trip to the Hardware Store.” Although it was extreme, it reminded me of my dad in a lot of ways.
What a fun book! Anyone who has a sense of humor would enjoy it. When I have time, I plan on getting the first book in the Quirky Essays of Quirky People series, I’m Not Talking about You, of Course…
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- LilMissMolly
- 12-16-14
Life Observations Reminiscent of Erma Bombeck
Any additional comments?
A Trip to the Hardware Store & Other Calamities is a collection of short essays of life's observations that are very reminiscent of Erma Bombeck. All of the stories were well written and moving ~ some of them were extremely funny.
Carrie Lee Martz did a great job narrating and contributed to my enjoyment of this short audio book.
At almost one hour, it's the perfect length for my commute to and from work. I can't wait to listen to Barbara Venkataraman's next collection of short essays!
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- GardenCat
- 04-13-14
Fun Listen
This was a fun, enjoyable listen. Listening to it felt like having a friend with a great sense of humor along for the ride, telling me some of her favorite stories.
While there were none that were particularly complex, it was still quite entertaining, in the way that personal stories often are.
The narrator was really good.
It's a collection of really authentic sounding, down to early stories that are believable and down to earth. I think my favorite passage was about the debtors - how she loved her debtors. I remember a landlord friend telling me one time that the late debtors were just his favorite - that they always paid more and were funny to listen to. This story reflected that experience.
It's family friendly, and should be great for a long commute or to take on a vacation. It's very personable, and funny in a easy, relaxing way that doesn't require total concentration.
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- reader and teacher
- 05-24-14
Cute and Quaint, Random and Real
If you could sum up A Trip to the Hardware Store & Other Calamities in three words, what would they be?
Cute/Quaint, Random, Real
Who was your favorite character and why?
NA - This is a nonfiction book, so there is the narrator/speaker (presumably the author) and her husband, the lady's 3 sisters, and a slew of random people she knows.
What does Carrie Lee Martz bring to the story that you wouldn’t experience if you just read the book?
The narrator has a smooth reading voice that makes this a quick, enjoyable experience.
Was there a moment in the book that particularly moved you?
My favorite stories were the dinner party and hearing about the collection duties.
Any additional comments?
Well done project.
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- Tracy Jillard
- 02-17-15
Well worth the listen
Was this a book you wanted to listen to all in one sitting?
one sitting
Any additional comments?
This book was laugh out loud funny, which can be embarrassing when you are listening to an audio book, depending on where you are. The namesake story wa the funniest by far. I am very glad to have grown up around men and women who always knew their way around a hardware store, or at least were willing to admit it when they were in over their heads, before things got to bad off. Well worth the read or the listen, especially if you need to laugh. .
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- DabOfDarkness
- 05-31-14
Fun, inoffensive, very mild.
Would you try another book from Barbara Venkataraman and/or Carrie Lee Martz?
Yes. I have listened to Venkataraman's Jamie Quinn Book 1 and really enjoyed it. Same narrator.
If you’ve listened to books by Barbara Venkataraman before, how does this one compare?
It was so inoffensive, so mellow, that I am not sure it will stand out in my memory in 2 or 3 months.
Have you listened to any of Carrie Lee Martz’s other performances before? How does this one compare?
Yes, I listened to her perform Jamie Quinn Book 1 and I liked that book better.
If this book were a movie would you go see it?
No. The sequence of short stories would not interest me as a movie.
Any additional comments?
Note: Even though this is Book 2 in the series, it stands alone just fine.
This collection of humorous essays captures snippets of real life. From the hardware store trip, to debt collection, to a failed dinner party, and the finance among friends, these little stories provide amusement.
I can see myself in several of these essays. I especially liked the dinner party story, Dinner Is Served. The narrator goes to great lengths to serve a tasty and impressive dinner. However, all her friends have dietary restrictions – allergic to nuts, avoiding gluten, etc. The tale ends on an amusing note of everyone deciding to order pizza, only to disagree on the toppings!
Your Account Is Past Due was my second favorite with silly little stories from a debt collector’s point of view. People tell the collector all sorts of things about their personal lives while explaining why they haven’t paid their bill.
Finally, the title piece, A Trip to the Hardware Store, gave me a giggle mostly because a confused pet dog became so flustered he piddled on fresh cement, creating quite a lot of rework for the owners. Yep, that would be my dog.
Over all, the collection was fun but not brilliant. It is suitable for all audiences with no cussing, no violence, and no adult situations. Basically, it was inoffensive. However, if you have a shared commute and want to listen to something besides your carpool snoring, this could be a fun listen. I did prefer her Jamie Quinn murder mystery over this book but this can serve as a good intro to the author’s sense of humor.
Narration: Carrie Lee Martz provided humor and surprise to the various characters in these essays. Her clear voice provided a nice narration.
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- Terri
- 10-29-14
A witty fun story!
This book is about several smaller stories of things that go wrong in everyday life. From discussing the newest gadgets for the kitchen, to trips to the hardware store, to planning meal or family gathering, to past jobs. What can go wrong, can & will.
I really enjoyed listening to this story. I could picture an Aunt or a Cousin actually doing the speaking. Very witty & quirky with the words. I had to chuckle when the entire family chimed in "Not the hardware store"! It kind of reminded me of stories Erma Bombeck used to say. I loved her stories too!
What a treat this book turned out to be! The author, Barbara Venkataraman is quite a comedian, finding humor in her everyday life. The Narrator, Carrie Lee Martz did a great job telling the tale to us with wonderful humor in the voices and wonderful accents when needed. A short book with a big POW! Well done ladies!
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- Ruff Day
- 06-03-14
Hilarious!
Where does A Trip to the Hardware Store & Other Calamities rank among all the audiobooks you’ve listened to so far?
This was my first humor non-fiction read. It's difficult to compare to other books since I normally read fiction, however, it kept me laughing so I rate it pretty high!
Which scene was your favorite?
I loved the collector's story. Every part of that just had me laughing out loud!
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- Michael Burke
- 04-16-14
just like our house
Is there anything you would change about this book?
The narrator is too subdued in her reading. I would like more enthusiasm.Reading is a skill not everyone is adapt at. That said, the stories ring true as they did in my family when things went humorously (in retrospect) wrong..
What other book might you compare A Trip to the Hardware Store & Other Calamities to and why?
Alice through the looking glass. Things just not quite right. Subtle but obvious out of place.
What did you like about the performance? What did you dislike?
Clear voice, good diction, but too even-toned for expression. Might use more expressive range for the situation. High and low tones and short and long enunciation
If this book were a movie would you go see it?
It's a series of short subject films from the 40's
Any additional comments?
Pleasant interlude but unexciting
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