
All I Want for Christmas is Tentacles
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Narrated by:
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Greg Boudreaux
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By:
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Chloe Archer
About this listen
Seasons greetings and alien abductions!
Khephren: There’s no way in Helgar's Nebula I’m marrying the candidate my parents have chosen for me. I don’t want to be the house-husband of some stoic warrior who only cares about training all day. Boring! Thankfully, I’ve learned a thing or two from all those rom-com human movies I’ve illegally downloaded off the intergalactic web. No one will see it coming when I pull a runaway groom maneuver on them!
Once I make my escape, I can go on the solo honeymoon of my dreams—to planet Earth. It’s almost that wondrous time of year when they celebrate their holiday known as “Christmas.” Human Hallmark movies make it seem so magical. I want to experience it for myself! Now, I just need to find a human who can make my wish come true and help me have an authentic holly jolly time…
Sasha: Scrooge was right when he said “bah humbug” to Christmas. This time of year sucks balls, and not the fun kind. I’ve just lost my crappy part-time job and I’m slowly sinking under a sea of student loan debt and crushed dreams.
Just when I think my life couldn’t possibly get any worse, my cat and I are abducted by an alien who wants me to help him experience a "real human Christmas" on his ship. WTF? Clearly he’s chosen the worst possible candidate for the job.
But there’s something about Khephren’s enthusiasm and eternal optimism that starts to melt even my grumpy, cynical heart. Heck, I even agree to be his fake fiancé to get his parents off his back! I don’t know what’s happening to me, but Khephren’s charm is making me feel things I never have before. And those bright pink tentacles of his are strangely fascinating. I can’t help but wonder what all they can do…
As we spend more time together, I start to realize I might not want to go home and that maybe, just maybe, I’ve found what I’ve always been looking for. Could Khephren feel the same? If so, it would be a Christmas miracle and I don’t believe in those…right?
©2023 Chloe Archer (P)2024 Chloe ArcherListeners also enjoyed...
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Jesse Stone is rebuilding his life. He’s ditched his no-good ex, sworn off men, moved to a new town with his four best friends, and started the pottery business of his dreams. And then he slept with his hunky new neighbor. Oops. Finn Hart knows that pursuing Jesse will ignite old family tensions, but the construction foreman can’t stay away. Can love wash away 20 years of bad blood and bring a new dawn for Jesse, Finn, and all of Hart's Bay?
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Good stories that touch on many personalities and issues.
- By CherylR on 11-26-23
By: E. Davies
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A Beginner's Guide to Death, Demons, and Other Afterlife Disasters
- Demonic Disasters and Afterlife Adventures, Book 1
- By: Shannon Mae
- Narrated by: Kirt Graves, Cooper North
- Length: 6 hrs
- Unabridged
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Adam is not having a good day. First, he finds out his very long-time boyfriend has been having an affair. Then, his dramatic exit becomes a little too dramatic when he ends up dead. To top it off, he finds out that the afterlife isn't at all what he expected (he has no desire to learn to play the harp, thank you very much). Fortunately for him, some afterlife bureaucratic screw-up ends him up with the most smoking-hot demon he's ever seen, and he decides he's keeping him. Maybe the afterlife won't be so bad after all.
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Interesting story
- By Sara on 10-28-24
By: Shannon Mae
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Sent to a Fantasy World and Now All the Men Want Me, Volume 1
- By: Jaclyn Osborn
- Narrated by: Nick J. Russo
- Length: 10 hrs and 17 mins
- Unabridged
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Evan just wants a quiet life where he escapes into books, drinks a ridiculous amount of coffee, and devours every muffin in sight. But then he's transported to another world with magic, sword-wielding knights with big... hearts, and men who find him too adorable to resist.
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BIG Fan !!!
- By Domanasha on 04-21-24
By: Jaclyn Osborn
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Patience
- Damned Connections, Book 1
- By: Lark Taylor
- Narrated by: Will M. Watt, Dan Calley
- Length: 10 hrs and 28 mins
- Unabridged
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Ferryman. The Grim Reaper. La Muerte. La Pelona. Shinigami. Charon. I've been called many names over the millennia, all thanks to my role in Hell—ferrying dead souls over the river Styx. Few know the demon behind the legend, how I came to be here, or the freedom I sacrificed to save the man I love.
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Quite literally couldn’t get enough
- By Lila Woods on 08-23-24
By: Lark Taylor
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Frost Bite
- By: Virginia Kelly, Lynn Van Dorn
- Narrated by: Michael Ferraiuolo
- Length: 6 hrs and 53 mins
- Unabridged
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Nick has no direction in his life, as his mother often reminds him. He works paycheck to paycheck, which becomes a problem when the paychecks stop coming in. When he's offered an opportunity to work off his rent, Nick decides there are worse things in life than being a super, especially when the job includes free rent. There is, however, a catch. His landlord is a vampire, and he needs more from Nick than maintenance and renter-wrangling. He needs Nick's blood.
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Narrator
- By ClinD2002 on 02-17-25
By: Virginia Kelly, and others
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Night Tricks
- Midnight Magic, Book 1
- By: Richard Amos
- Narrated by: Tom North
- Length: 7 hrs and 16 mins
- Unabridged
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The streets have been my home for as long as I can remember. To get by, I use my magic tricks, bringing smiles to the faces of adults and children alike. As a warlock, my powers are limited. Nothing like a witch's magical skills. Basically, I'm a glorified magician as well as a second-class citizen. Fine. It doesn't get me down. I have my cat Fizz and Kylie Minogue's music to keep me going as I dream big. I know there's a better life out there for me.
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Gosh!
- By Pamela on 12-15-24
By: Richard Amos
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Stix & Stone
- MM Urban Romance (Alpha's Rejects, Book 1)
- By: Courtney W. Dixon
- Narrated by: Harley Chase
- Length: 8 hrs and 36 mins
- Unabridged
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Just the sight of Nico ‘Stix’ Jamieson makes me want to hurt something. Between his stupid smiles on that annoyingly handsome face and the constant drumming of anything that makes a sound with those drumsticks of his, I want to throttle him. No one is that happy. I don’t trust it. Even when my hate for him is clear, he throws it back in my face with a smile and wave. And how he loves to push my buttons when he’s feeling especially obnoxious. If I hate him, then why am I obsessed with him?
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Incredible mm story!!
- By Rosa dunahue on 01-17-25
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Conjured Chaos Kisses
- Monster Match
- By: Ki Brightly
- Narrated by: Keval Shah
- Length: 3 hrs and 38 mins
- Unabridged
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Leander Mast didn’t ask to come to Rivenfield, and he definitely didn’t ask to be thrust into the middle of a neighborhood battle over an ancient tree, but as a Giwoggle—who goes wherever a witch might conjure him—he doesn’t have much choice in the matter. And Leander definitely doesn’t count on getting stuck. While Leander attempts to get home, struggling against the magic keeping him from stepping outside the town limits, he butts heads with Ben, his new grumpy neighbor. And it doesn’t help that Leander cut down Ben’s tree.
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Very cute and funny story
- By Carl E. Reed on 06-27-24
By: Ki Brightly
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Wreaking Havoc
- Demon Bound, Book 1
- By: Grae Bryan
- Narrated by: Michael Ferraiuolo
- Length: 7 hrs and 19 mins
- Unabridged
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Sascha has always felt powerless, the weak baby of a cruel family. But that’s fine. He has his looks, his ample allowance, and a smattering of one-night stands to keep him busy. But when Sascha’s oldest brother offends the wrong people, Sascha finds himself in hiding with a target on his back. And when poking around in his temporary home leads to accidentally summoning the hottest demon Sascha could ever imagine, he has to ask himself: does he want to feel powerless anymore?
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DEMONS!!
- By Jacqueleen the Reading Queen on 03-12-25
By: Grae Bryan
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A Spell for Heartsickness: A Romantasy
- The Rune Tithe, Book 1
- By: Alistair Reeves
- Narrated by: James Joseph
- Length: 13 hrs and 49 mins
- Unabridged
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Witch Briar Wyngrave's time is limited. The wasting curse that killed his mother is coming for him too, consuming his magic bit by bit. At least he'll have the chance to make his name as a magical fashion designer with an elite placement in Pentawynn, the country's glittering capital, after graduation. Until, that is, a prophecy sends him to the remote island of Coill Darragh instead, in search of a predestined lover with a mysterious mask.
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fate is only a guide
- By Kymaaera999 on 05-01-25
By: Alistair Reeves
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Fake Dates and Fanged Mistakes
- By: Alice Winters
- Narrated by: Michael Ferraiuolo
- Length: 10 hrs and 11 mins
- Unabridged
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This week hasn’t gone the best for me unless you count Casimir, the sexy ancient vampire, bringing me back from the brink of death (and tying my fate to his in the process). Not that it matters if the werewolves and vampires don’t stop their ridiculous feud, because someone is targeting them and widening the divide between our communities with each body they leave in their wake. But as the alpha’s son, I have a plan to fix everything. I’m going to convince Casimir to fake date me to show the others that we can work together. I mean… what could go wrong?
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Worth the listen!
- By Marc Hunter on 03-26-24
By: Alice Winters
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How to Train Your Human Omega
- Coveted Bonds, Book 1
- By: Arden Fox
- Narrated by: Nick J. Russo, Gabriel Michael
- Length: 10 hrs and 15 mins
- Unabridged
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I don't ask for much from life; I get paid, and then I get laid. And piloting spaceships across the galaxy keeps my solo lifestyle well-funded. I don't need a relationship or any of the baggage that comes with it. I like my men like I like my coffee; to go. That is, until the most boring job in the universe goes horribly wrong and I'm snatched from my ship by a seven-foot alien. He's huge, he's purple, and he's ripped as hell. I'm sure I'm a dead man. Only it turns out he doesn't want to kill me. What he wants is far worse.
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Intense emotional story
- By Nicholas Pesqueda on 01-17-25
By: Arden Fox
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Bay
- The Smoky Vale Alliance, Book 1
- By: Gianni Holmes
- Narrated by: John Solo
- Length: 11 hrs and 19 mins
- Unabridged
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As the former mayor of Smoky Vale, I hinged my campaign on getting rid of all bikers. They are everything that's wrong with our town. Everywhere they go they breed crudeness, chaos, and carnage. Then my son fell in love with not one, but two of them. Now I have no choice but to interact with the very people I tried to take down. My disapproval of their lifestyle wavers when a spawn of Goliath backs me into a wall, kisses me senselessly, and makes it clear in the most vulgar way possible what he wants to do to me.
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Fantastic!
- By Lori M on 11-19-24
By: Gianni Holmes
What listeners say about All I Want for Christmas is Tentacles
Highly rated for:
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- Jacqueleen the Reading Queen
- 12-04-24
"He feels so right to me --like he should be mine
As usual, Greg Boudreaux does a fantastic job narrating this tentacular romance! I enjoyed his voices for each character and felt they fit. The book was an adorable grumpy/sunshine pairing. I just loved the holiday smoopyness. Khephren was absolutely precious. His enthusiasm for life was infectious. Even the surly human Sasha couldn't resist! It was the cutest thing ever seeing these two dance around their feelings for one another. Even Khephren's two best friends could tell they were head over heels for one another.
Sasha may have started their space adventure being abducted from his life on Earth, but it soon becomes apparent it wasn't much of a life at all. On board the Sleigh Belle he slowly discovers how different his life could be. He could have friends who become family and he could have the love of the absolute sweetest alien in the galaxy.
The scene where Sasha and River get to meet via space video is amazing. I knew right away those two would get on like a house on fire. No shame, the both of them. It would be so fun if we could see more of them interacting in a future Tentacular Tales book. I bet River would love Khephren too. Like Sasha realizes, it's truly impossible not to fall in love with that pink tentacled alien.
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- Teresa
- 12-07-24
Tentacles Love.
Khephren kidnaps Sasha because he wants an human Christmas experience. Sadly Sasha doesn’t hand any Christmas spirit due to how he was treated by his family when he came out. Kephren and Sasha are adorable together. I love them and Khephren’s tentacle friends.
Greg has done an awesome job narrating this story. I loved it!
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- Kassandra Knight
- 12-08-24
All I Want For Christmas Is Tentacles
I loved it. I already knew I would especially because Greg narrated it. The excerpt at the end was epic.
There’s some feels here so mind the trigger warnings.
Highly recommend.
I received a free copy of this audiobook from the author and am voluntarily leaving a review.
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- Canadian Girl Reads
- 12-12-24
Khephren and Sasha
"𝙒𝙚 𝙬𝙖𝙣𝙩 𝙩𝙤 𝙛𝙞𝙣𝙙 𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙤𝙬𝙣 𝙮𝙚𝙡𝙡𝙤𝙬 𝙗𝙧𝙞𝙘𝙠 𝙧𝙤𝙖𝙙 𝙖𝙢𝙤𝙣𝙜 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙨𝙩𝙖𝙧𝙨!"
Aʟʟ I Wᴀɴᴛ ꜰᴏʀ Cʜʀɪsᴛᴍᴀs ɪs Tᴇɴᴛᴀᴄʟᴇs • Chloe Archer
Tinsel & Tentacles
🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁
Khephren doesn't want to go through with his arranged marriage and wants to experience Christmas the same way Earthlings do so he runs away from his wedding and abducts Sasha, and Jonsey, hoping for the Christmas he's always wished for and unaware of the extra magic it will bring.
Khephren and Sasha had me laughing, crying, and swooning through the entire book. These two were everything I didn't know I needed in my life. I love how adorably romantic Khephren is and how he brought back Sasha's Christmas spirit. I love this found family and hope to see more of them in the future.
A year ago this was my first experience with Chloe Archer, a year later this book is just as great as it was the first time I read it, and this time around was made even better with the audiobook and narration by Greg Boudreaux. Greg outdid himself again with fantastic narration and bringing the story to life. I can see this audiobook becoming a yearly listen.
Get ready for... mm, sci-fi, alien/human, alien abduction, size difference, grumpy/sunshine, runaway groom, fake fiancé, found family, romantic comedy, pansexual, holiday (Christmas), and first-person point of view.
**Review Updated December 2024**
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- Cassie Morgis
- 12-03-24
Tentacles for the win!
I was super excited to listen this book, Tentaclar tales books where so awesome, I listened to them all multiple times. This new spin off was just as good. Can't wait for more in this newest series!
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- Andrea
- 12-14-24
Cute Tentacle Christmas Story
I love Chloe Archer’s tentacular tales series! This cute Christmas book in the series was just what I needed! Kef was just the cinnamon roll man, alien, to bring back grumpy Sasha’s Christmas series! Greg did an amazing job narrating as always! I will definitely be reading this book again, especially during the holiday season.
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- Kashonna
- 12-02-24
Princess Jonsey steals the show
This was a great listen. Greg as always gave a wonderful performance. Listening to him nail Kheph's enthusiasm, Luna's hyperness, Najar's stoicism & Sasha's snark left me in awe. And he even brought life into a robot! This alien adventure was cute. I never thought I'd wonder if aliens would really be enamored by our holidays. If you're looking for a Christmas book to listen to I definitely recommend this one. You can't go wrong with one that involves aliens and their belief that Christmas is a great holiday and cats are Gods.
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- BookWyrm
- 12-14-24
Tentacled intergalactic Christmas adventures
This was a completely adorable grumpy/sunshine galactic holiday romance adventure set in the Tentacular Tales universe (with minimal crossover, so can be read as a standalone). It was one of those stories that fell down the trope tree, hitting as many branches as possible along the way. On one tentacle, we have Khephren who was a sweet, wickedly smart, Christmas obsessed, tentacled, pink, cinnamon roll of an alien that spread sunshine as he bumbled along his intergalactic adventure escaping an unwanted mating. On the other was Sasha who was grumpy, wildly creative, and Christmas adverse with his feline companion Jonesey who fall prey to Khephren’s tractor beam when he tried for a human “expert” to help them have an authentic Christmas. Many hijinks later and it’s obvious the two were meant for each other. The whole thing was just a charming and fun Christmas romance with the kind of characters, situations, and humor the author is known for.
As always, Greg Boudreaux does an amazing job bringing the book to life and imbuing even more character in the story. From Khephren to Sasha, and new secondary characters to cameos of old favorites, they all have their own distinct voice and personality.
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- Booklover876🇯🇲
- 12-13-24
Alien abduction xmas style
Khep is the absolute sweetest tentacle boy ever. Sasha is a grumpy scrooge of a human, which is understandable with what he's been through. This Christmas however, these two, through the miracle of the season will have a cozy and sweet romance aboard the starship Sleigh Belle. It's a wonderful adventure among the stars for Khephren, Sasha, Luna, Najar, Jonesey the cat, and Rambo the Droid. Beautiful narration from Greg Boudreaux as usual. I hope we get to see more of them in the future.
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- Ashley
- 12-09-24
SO MUCH LISTENING FUN!
I hands down really loved this! This story was such a cute holiday delight! Loved hearing the characters and story!
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