
At Dark, I Become Loathsome
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Narrated by:
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Andrew Eiden
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By:
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Eric LaRocca
About this listen
From Eric LaRocca—Bram Stoker Award–nominated and Splatterpunk Award–winning author of Things Have Gotten Worse Since We Last Spoke—comes At Dark, I Become Loathsome, a grim yet gentle, horrifying yet hopeful, intense tale of death, trauma, and love.
“If you’re reading this, you’ve likely thought that the world would be a better place without you.”
A single line of text, glowing in the darkness of the internet. Written by Ashley Lutin, who has often thought the same—and worse—in the years since his wife died and his young son disappeared. But the peace of the grave is not for him—it’s for those he can help. Ashley has constructed a peculiar ritual for those whose desire to die is at war with their yearning to live a better life.
Struggling to overcome his own endless grief, one night Ashley finds connection with Jinx—a potential candidate for Ashley’s next ritual—who spins a tale both revolting and fascinating. Thus begins a relationship that traps the two men in an ever-tightening spiral of painful revelations, where long-hidden secrets are dragged, kicking and screaming, into the light.
Only through pain can we find healing. Only through death can we find new life.
Book discussion questions are available here: s3.us-west-2.amazonaws.com/www.blackstoneaudio.com/docs/At%20Dark%20I%20Become%20Loathsome%20Discussion%20Questions.pdf
PLEASE NOTE: When you purchase this title, the accompanying PDF will be available in your Audible Library along with the audio.
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Jazz Bashara is a criminal. Well, sort of. Life on Artemis, the first and only city on the moon, is tough if you're not a rich tourist or an eccentric billionaire. So smuggling in the occasional harmless bit of contraband barely counts, right? Not when you've got debts to pay and your job as a porter barely covers the rent. Everything changes when Jazz sees the chance to commit the perfect crime, with a reward too lucrative to turn down.
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A ferrari with no motor
- By will on 11-18-17
By: Andy Weir
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Do You Remember?
- By: Freida McFadden
- Narrated by: Teri Schnaubelt
- Length: 7 hrs and 12 mins
- Unabridged
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Tess Strebel can’t recognize her own face. She can’t recognize her home. Her bedroom is unfamiliar. And she can’t remember the handsome stranger lying next to her in bed. A stranger who claims he’s her husband. Tess reads a letter in her own handwriting, composed during a rare lucid day, explaining her life as it now exists: she was in a terrible car accident one year ago. Every morning, she wakes up unable to remember most of the last decade. Including her own wedding.
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One of the better ones
- By cotswoldrose on 10-13-24
By: Freida McFadden
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10 Rules for the Perfect Murder
- By: James Patterson, Chris Tebbetts
- Narrated by: Reid Scott, Cobie Smulders, full cast
- Length: 3 hrs and 2 mins
- Original Recording
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After the killing of a prominent mob lawyer, NYPD homicide detectives Jacob Jackson and Caitlin Grimes start receive chilling, written “rules” for how to commit the perfect murder. "Rule number one for the perfect murder: Evidence is your enemy. Leave none behind." Jackson (Reid Scott) and Grimes (Cobie Smulders) race to find the killer, setting them on a collision course with the city’s crime underbelly, and a perpetrator who seems happy to toy with them. “Rule number two. No crimes of passion. The perfect murder is always business, never pleasure.”
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Tricky
- By Robert Scott Read on 10-30-24
By: James Patterson, and others
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Sherlock Holmes: The Definitive Collection
- By: Arthur Conan Doyle, Stephen Fry - introductions
- Narrated by: Stephen Fry
- Length: 71 hrs and 57 mins
- Unabridged
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Ever since he made his first appearance in A Study In Scarlet, Sherlock Holmes has enthralled and delighted millions of fans throughout the world. Now Audible is proud to present Arthur Conan Doyle's Sherlock Holmes, read by Stephen Fry. A lifelong fan of Doyle's detective fiction, Fry has narrated the definitive collection of Sherlock Holmes - four novels and four collections of short stories. And, exclusively for Audible, Stephen has written and narrated eight insightful introductions, one for each title.
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Chapter Guide!
- By Katya Rice on 05-25-18
By: Arthur Conan Doyle, and others
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Denali
- By: Austin Bunn
- Narrated by: Jack Falahee, Jake Lacy, Amrit Kaur, and others
- Length: 1 hr and 16 mins
- Original Recording
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Three friends from small-town Pennsylvania set out to conquer Denali, North America's highest peak, but only two come down alive. On the mountain, their grand adventure unravels into a harrowing tale of survival, betrayal, and the haunting consequences of ambition pushed too far. For fans of Into Thin Air, Touching the Void, and 127 Hours, Denali has a full cast, jaw-dropping twists, and immersive sound design that will transport you to one of the most extreme environments on earth.
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Vertical Limit did it better
- By 🔥 Phx17 🔥 on 01-30-25
By: Austin Bunn
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The Ex
- By: Freida McFadden
- Narrated by: Nicol Zanzarella
- Length: 8 hrs and 33 mins
- Unabridged
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Cassie thinks she has met the perfect man. Joel is sweet, handsome, romantic, and best of all, he’s crazy about Cassie. She thinks she’s found the guy she’ll spend the rest of her life with. Have children with. Grow old with. Yes, she knows about his perfect ex-girlfriend, Francesca. The beautiful, brilliant chef, beloved by all his friends. But she thinks Francesca is out of the picture. She thinks Francesca is gone for good. Think again, Cassie.
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Too bizarre for someone who loves bizarre
- By G. C. Webster on 07-01-22
By: Freida McFadden
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In 1939, on a remote Pacific island, botanical researcher Irene Greer plunges off a waterfall to her death, convinced the spirits of her dead husband and daughter had joined the nightmarchers—ghosts of ancient warriors that rise from their burial sites on moonless nights. But was it suicide, or did a strange young missionary girl, Agnes, play a role in Irene's deteriorating state of mind?
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This Skin Was Once Mine
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A brand-new collection of four intense, claustrophobic and terrifying horror tales from the Bram Stoker Award®-nominated and Splatterpunk Award-winning author of Things Have Gotten Worse Since We Last Spoke.
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Makes me uncomfortable (but I like it)
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For the last year, Holly and Brian have been out of sync. Neither can forget what happened that one winter evening; neither can forgive what’s happened since. Tonight, Holly and Brian race toward Pinebuck, New York, trying to outrun a blizzard on their way to the ski village getaway they hope will save their relationship. But soon they lose control of the car—and then of themselves. Now Sheriff Kendra Book is getting calls about a couple in trouble—along with reports of a brutal and mysterious creature rampaging through town.
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A precocious young girl with an unusual imagination is sent on an odyssey into the depths of depravity. After her father dies violently, young Mara is surprised to find her mother welcoming a new guest into their home, claiming that he will protect them from the world of devastation and destruction outside their door.
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Well.
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At the Bottom of the Garden
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Clara Woods is a killer—and perfectly fine with it, too. So what if she takes a couple of lives to make her own a little bit better? At the bottom of her garden is a flower bed, long overgrown, where her late husband rests in peace—or so she’s always thought. Then the girls arrive. Lily and Violet are her nieces, recently orphaned after their affluent parents died on an ill-fated anniversary trip. In accordance with their parents’ will, the sisters are to go to their closest relative—who happens to be Clara.
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Great Idea; Mediocre Execution
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Eight stories of literary dark fiction from a master storyteller. Exploring the shadow side of love, these are tales of grief, obsession, control. Intricate examinations of trauma and tragedy in raw, poetic prose. In these narratives, a woman imagines horrific scenarios whilst caring for her infant niece; online posts chronicle a cancer diagnosis; a couple in the park with their small child encounter a stranger with horrific consequences; a toxic relationship reaches a terrifying resolution . . .
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Immensely dark. Don’t believe the negativity.
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Highly recommended if you hate yourself
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Grim Wolds, England: Winifred Notty arrives at Ensor House prepared to play the perfect governess—she’ll dutifully tutor her charges, Drusilla and Andrew, tell them bedtime stories, and only joke about eating children. But long, listless days spent within the estate’s dreary confines come with an intimate knowledge of the perversions and pathetic preoccupations of the Pounds family—Mr. Pounds can’t keep his eyes off Winifred’s chest, and Mrs. Pounds takes a sickly pleasure in punishing Winifred for her husband’s wandering gaze.
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meh
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Margot and Mama have lived by the forest ever since Margot can remember. When Margot is not at school, they spend quiet days together in their cottage, waiting for strangers to knock on their door. Strays, Mama calls them. People who have strayed too far from the road. Mama loves the strays. She feeds them wine, keeps them warm. Then she satisfies her burning appetite by picking apart their bodies. But Mama’s want is stronger than her hunger sometimes.
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This book ATE
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The Woods All Black is a story of passion, prejudice, and power—an Appalachian period piece that explores reproductive justice and bodily autonomy, the terrors of small-town religiosity, and the necessity of fighting tooth and claw to live as who you truly are.
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Sadomasochism. Obsession. Death. A whirlpool of darkness churns at the heart of a macabre ballet between two lonely young women in an internet chat room in the early 2000s - a darkness that threatens to forever transform them once they finally succumb to their most horrific desires. What have you done today to deserve your eyes?
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Meh...
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The Contortionist's Handbook
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John Dolan Vincent was born with an extra ring finger on one hand. He was an abnormally gifted child with a proclivity for mathematics beyond his years, but he lacked social skills. Childhood ridicule and a difficult family life led him to use his talents in adulthood for criminal acts of forgery. When he starts getting untreatable migraines, his self-medication results in overdosing which sends him repeatedly to the emergency room.
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I am Jack's utter lack of imagination
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Amber Pierce thought she'd planned the perfect family vacation. Seeking to mend the rift with her daughter, she books a camping retreat in the breathtaking Cascades . . . a trip that includes her ex-husband and his new wife. But hours into their first hike, the group takes a wrong turn. Days later, they're lost, hungry, dehydrated, and hope is fading.
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Painful to listen
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Beta Vulgaris
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Elise and her boyfriend, Tom, set off for Minnesota, hoping the paycheck from the sugar beet harvest will cover the rent on their Brooklyn apartment. Amidst the grueling work and familiar anxieties about her finances, Elise starts noticing strange things: threatening phone calls, a mysterious rash, and snatches of an ominous voice coming from the beet pile. When Tom and other coworkers begin to vanish, Elise is left alone to confront the weight of her past, the horrors of her uncertain future, and the menacing but enticing siren song of the beets.
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The awful personality of the main character.
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The Harvest
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Tim Waverly, a young teacher, escapes London's spiralling housing costs by becoming a live-in caretaker at an abandoned orphanage. But his arrival triggers a series of frightening events. An ancient evil has awakened. A new Harvest has begun. As Tim and those around him become engulfed in a dark nightmare, he is forced to confront his deepest fears in order to save countless innocent lives.
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What listeners say about At Dark, I Become Loathsome
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Anonymous User
- 02-21-25
If you want to feel weirded out and read about loss, this is it
This was different. It was a unique take on someone who has been ravaged by loss and tries to find the thing that keeps them going. Although the two side stories do give context to the plot, I believe they took up too much space in relation to the length of the main plot. There could’ve been more done there to keep the audience going. Nonetheless- creepy, disgusting, sexual, agonizing, and a great listen (loved the narrator). Overall I’d say a 7.8-7.9/10
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- Adam Rodriguez
- 03-18-25
The reader ! His voice was nice and didn’t bore me.
The story was okay, and good. Would not re read. But it was a good story.
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- Andres Matinez
- 02-13-25
Dark tragedy dealing with loss and death
The story was good and the characters are tragic but it’s a great story told by Mr Larooca
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- Isaac B. Loredo
- 03-14-25
There’s always a first
This is the first audiobook I read that’s is more thriller or like spooky vibes, and I have to say it was so good! Like wow must hear or read 🔥
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- jfkreuz
- 03-16-25
unbelievably annoying
a good story ruined by irritating repetitive "artistic" choices. I would've enjoyed this story if the author hadn't kept repeating the title over and over again every other sentence. it must've been annoying to type it but Im sure copy and paste made it a little easier. other obnoxious unnecessary repetition, an online chat where the entire chat handle is repeated after every sentence. it's repeated probably 60 + times in the span of a 10 minute aside. when reading this you would just skip over it but as an audio book you have to hear the narrator repeat it over and over in a slightly more intense manor suggestions that the repetition is somehow elevating the over all experience. it really doesn't. its just annoying.
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- Amanda
- 02-10-25
DNF
Narrator is good, premise is good. I dont want to listen to the detailed abuse of dogs. After the 2nd description of killing a dog I DNF'd. A trigger warning would have stopped me from spending the money at all.
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- Scentart
- 02-22-25
yuck. what a time suck
Bad, dark, violent. Who masturbates to illness? Waste of talent 9pn the author's part? I need a shower
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