
Big Dumb Eyes
Stories from a Simpler Mind
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Narrated by:
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Nate Bargatze
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By:
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Nate Bargatze
About this listen
From one of the hottest stand-up comedians, Nate Bargatze brings his everyman comedy to book form in this hilarious collection of personal stories, opinions, and confessions.
Nate Bargatze used to be a genius. That is, until the summer after seventh grade when he slipped, fell off a cliff, hit his head on a rock, and “my skull got, like, dented or something.” Before this accident, he dreamed of being “an electric engineer, or a doctor that does brain stuff, or a math teacher who teaches the hardest math on earth.” Afterwards, all he could do was stand-up comedy.* But the “brain stuff” industry’s loss is everyone else’s gain because Nate went on to become one of today’s top-grossing comedians, breaking both attendance and streaming records.
In his highly anticipated first book, Nate talks about life as a non-genius. From stories about his first car (named Old Blue, a clunky Mazda with a tennis ball stick shift) and his travels as a Southerner (Northerners like to ask if he believes in dinosaurs), to tales of his first apartment where he was almost devoured by rats and his many debates with his wife over his chores, his diet, and even his definition of “shopping.” He also reflects on such heady topics as his irrational passion for Vandy football and the mysterious origins of sushi (how can a California roll come from old-time Japan?).
BIG DUMB EYES is full of heart. It will make listeners laugh out loud and nod in recognition, but it probably won’t make them think too much.
*Nate’s family disputes this entire story.
PLEASE NOTE: When you purchase this title, the accompanying PDF will be available in your Audible Library along with the audio.
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My Friends
- A Novel
- By: Fredrik Backman
- Narrated by: Marin Ireland
- Length: 13 hrs and 7 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Most people don’t even notice them—three tiny figures sitting at the end of a long pier in the corner of one of the most famous paintings in the world. Most people think it’s just a depiction of the sea. But Louisa, an artist herself, knows otherwise and she is determined to find out the story of these three enigmatic figures. Twenty-five years earlier, in a distant town, a group of teenagers find refuge from their difficult home lives by spending their days laughing and telling stories out on a pier.
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How can he keep doing this? Another masterpiece!
- By Blue on 05-08-25
By: Fredrik Backman
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The Evin Prison Bakers’ Club
- Surviving Iran's Most Notorious Prisons in 16 Recipes
- By: Sepideh Gholian
- Narrated by: Ashraf Shirazi
- Length: 3 hrs and 25 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
How do you cheer up a woman who has spent hours cleaning prison toilets with a broken mop? The secret is in a tres leches cake. In Iran’s prisons, women endure horrors: they are beaten, interrogated, and humiliated in a thousand ways. Even a whisper to a fellow inmate can be punished. Yet—in spite of anything and everything—they resist: they bake. They console each other, cry together, dance together. The Evin Prison Bakers’ Club is a call to stand up for Woman, Life, Freedom by a woman still fighting for a free Iran.
By: Sepideh Gholian
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The Tenant
- By: Freida McFadden
- Narrated by: Will Damron, Christine Lakin
- Length: 8 hrs and 50 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Blake Porter is riding high, until he's not. Fired abruptly from his job as a VP of marketing and unable to make the mortgage payments on the new brownstone he shares with his fiancée, he's desperate to make ends meet. Enter Whitney. Beautiful, charming, down-to-earth, and looking for a room to rent. She's exactly what Blake's looking for. Or is she? Because something isn't quite right. The neighbors start treating Blake differently. The smell of decay permeates his home, no matter how hard he scrubs. Strange noises jar him awake in the middle of the night.
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the twist
- By Sheila on 05-09-25
By: Freida McFadden
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Great Big Beautiful Life
- By: Emily Henry
- Narrated by: Julia Whelan
- Length: 12 hrs and 2 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Alice Scott is an eternal optimist still dreaming of her big writing break. Hayden Anderson is a Pulitzer-prize winning human thundercloud. And they’re both on balmy Little Crescent Island for the same reason: To write the biography of a woman no one has seen in years—or at least to meet with the octogenarian who claims to be the Margaret Ives. Tragic heiress, former tabloid princess, and daughter of one of the most storied (and scandalous) families of the 20th Century.
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Just, wow.
- By julia lee on 04-25-25
By: Emily Henry
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A Very Punchable Face
- A Memoir
- By: Colin Jost
- Narrated by: Colin Jost
- Length: 7 hrs and 41 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
If there’s one trait that makes someone well-suited to comedy, it’s being able to take a punch - metaphorically and, occasionally, physically. Told with a healthy dose of self-deprecation, A Very Punchable Face reveals the brilliant mind behind some of the dumbest sketches on television, and lays bare the heart and humor of a hardworking guy - with a face you can’t help but want to punch.
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Amazing
- By Erin E. Kace on 07-27-20
By: Colin Jost
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Class Clown
- The Memoirs of a Professional Wiseass: How I Went 77 Years Without Growing Up
- By: Dave Barry
- Narrated by: Dave Barry
- Length: 6 hrs and 58 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
How does the son of a Presbyterian minister wind up winning a Pulitzer Prize for writing a wildly inaccurate newspaper column read by millions of people? In Class Clown, Dave Barry takes us on a hilarious ride, starting with a childhood largely spent throwing rocks for entertainment—there was no internet—and preparing for nuclear war by hiding under a classroom desk. After literally getting elected class clown in high school, he went to college, where, as an English major, he read snippets of great literature when he was not busy playing in a rock band (it was the sixties).
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More than good enough, though less than the very best memoirs
- By Tom Craven on 05-19-25
By: Dave Barry
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SNAFU
- The Definitive Guide to History's Greatest Screwups
- By: Ed Helms
- Narrated by: Ed Helms
- Length: 8 hrs and 53 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
From actor, comedian, writer, and host of the hit history podcast SNAFU, Ed Helms brings you an absurdly entertaining look at history’s biggest blunders.
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Swinging Spies!
- By Stephen on 05-13-25
By: Ed Helms
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The Missing Half
- A Novel
- By: Ashley Flowers, Alex Kiester - contributor
- Narrated by: Saskia Maarleveld, Ashley Flowers
- Length: 8 hrs and 11 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Nic wants nothing more than to move on—from her sister’s disappearance and the state it’s left her in. But then one day, Jules’s sister, Jenna Connor, walks into her life and offers Nic something she hasn’t felt in a long time: hope. What follows is a gripping tale of two sisters who will do anything to find their missing halves, even if it means destroying everything they’ve ever known.
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Even better than her first book!
- By Erin on 05-07-25
By: Ashley Flowers, and others
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The Hollow Half
- A Memoir of Bodies and Borders
- By: Sarah Aziza
- Narrated by: Sarah Aziza
- Length: 12 hrs and 9 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
“You were dead, Sarah, you were dead.” In October 2019, Sarah Aziza, daughter and granddaughter of Gazan refugees, is narrowly saved after being hospitalized for an eating disorder. The doctors revive her body, but it is no simple thing to return to the land of the living. Aziza’s crisis is a rupture that brings both her ancestral and personal past into vivid presence. The hauntings begin in the hospital cafeteria, when a mysterious incident summons the familiar voice of her deceased Palestinian grandmother.
By: Sarah Aziza
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The Names
- A Novel
- By: Florence Knapp
- Narrated by: Dervla Kirwan
- Length: 9 hrs and 40 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
In the wake of a catastrophic storm, Cora sets off with her nine-year-old daughter, Maia, to register her son's birth. Her husband, Gordon, a local doctor, respected in the community but a terrifying and controlling presence at home, intends for her to name the infant after him. But when the registrar asks what she'd like to call the child, Cora hesitates...
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Truly Exceptional
- By debhud on 05-28-25
By: Florence Knapp
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Brian Regan: Standing Up
- By: Brian Regan
- Narrated by: Brian Regan
- Length: 54 mins
- Original Recording
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Overall
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Performance
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Brian Regan uses wry observations and physical humor to tackle all the important topics like butterflies, show horses, and greeting cards.
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Hilarious
- By Kate on 11-25-23
By: Brian Regan
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Mark Twain
- By: Ron Chernow
- Narrated by: Jason Culp
- Length: 44 hrs and 35 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Pulitzer Prize-winning biographer Ron Chernow illuminates the full, fascinating, and complex life of the writer long celebrated as the father of American literature, Mark Twain.
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Another great book
- By Terry Hubbard on 05-17-25
By: Ron Chernow
Nate's Vandy is my Chicago Bears- I feel ya Nate
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So fun!
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Hearing his journey made me adore him even more. But Laura gained my deepest sympathy for putting up with all of that. My respect grew for his authenticity, seeing how he creates fantastic entertainment out of relatable stories that would otherwise be beyond boring 😆.
I hope his comedy continues to be this classic. The book is worth every penny, they’re not “getting one over on you!”
Classic Loafman!
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Worth listening to!
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Yayyyy, Nate!!!!
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Love family stories!
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It's A Nate,Nate,Nate Nate World!!
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Fun Listen
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I read Big Dumb Eyes in one day—and not because it was short, but because I genuinely couldn’t put it down. Nate Bargatze’s humor translates seamlessly from stage to page. Every chapter feels like you’re sitting in a room with him, listening to one hilarious story after another, told with that classic dry wit and down-to-earth charm he’s known for.The book is packed with self-deprecating tales, quirky observations, and the kind of honest reflections that make you laugh and think at the same time. Whether you’re a longtime fan of his stand-up or just looking for a feel-good, laugh-out-loud read, this book delivers.Highly recommend if you need a good escape and a reminder not to take life too seriously.
Nate is the best.
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Practically perfect
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