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Born Under the Gaslight
- A Memoir of My Descent into Borderline Personality Disorder
- Narrated by: Taylor Coan
- Length: 4 hrs and 15 mins
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Publisher's summary
“What will the neighbors think?” “Keep your voice down, or the neighbors will hear you screaming.”
I never knew the neighbors, but, more importantly, they never knew my family. Right next door was a house of horror, and they indeed never knew. This is the story that was carefully concealed from you. This is the story that can happen even if you do grow up with neighbors watching.
From author Cindy Collins comes an unblinkingly honest, poignant, and often heartbreaking firsthand account of what it’s like to live with borderline personality disorder (BPD)...and the pervasive trauma she endured as a child that led to her descent into the dark world of BPD.
Gaslighted by her mother - who cultivated an outward appearance of being the perfect wife and mother - Cindy suffered ongoing sexual abuse by multiple family members, abandonment, and cruelty at the hands of the one person who should have loved and protected her most. The resulting fits of rage, extreme thinking, difficulty maintaining relations, and depression would set Cindy on a path of destruction until she finally found the hope and courage to fight her demons.
Chronicling her childhood of abuse, her diagnosis of BPD in her twenties, and her ultimate road to recovery, Born Under the Gaslight is a memoir like none you have ever listened to before. Offering a rare and insightful glimpse into the inner struggles of someone who lives with BPD, Born Under the Gaslight is a must-listen for therapists, others living with BPD, and anyone wanting to understand the complexities of BPD and how to offer practical and emotional support.
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Better as an additional book
- By Ethan on 09-18-19
By: Abigail Trafford
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Have a New Teenager by Friday
- From Mouthy and Moody to Respectful and Responsible in 5 Days
- By: Kevin Leman
- Narrated by: Kirby Heybourne
- Length: 9 hrs and 28 mins
- Unabridged
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Congratulations! You have a teenager in your home. Life will never quite be the same again (of course, you already know that). But it can be better than you’ve ever dreamed. In fact, you’re just five days away from your teenager asking, “What can I do to help?” Guaranteed! With his signature wit and commonsense psychology, internationally recognized family expert and New York Times best-selling author Dr. Kevin Leman will help you. your teenager’s life. With Dr. Leman’s instinct and insight, plus an index with gutsy advice on 75 hot-button issues that keep parents up at night.
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Listen with a Critical Mind
- By Stephanie on 03-25-13
By: Kevin Leman
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Hidden Girl
- The True Story of a Modern-Day Child Slave
- By: Shyima Hall, Lisa Wysocky
- Narrated by: Robin Eller
- Length: 6 hrs and 48 mins
- Unabridged
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Shyima Hall was born in Egypt on September 29, 1989, the seventh child of desperately poor parents. When she was eight, her parents sold her into slavery. Shyima then moved two hours away to Egypt's capitol city of Cairo to live with a wealthy family and serve them eighteen hours a day, seven days a week. When she was ten, her captors moved to Orange County, California, and smuggled Shyima with them. Two years later, an anonymous call from a neighbor brought about the end of Shyima's servitude - but her journey to true freedom was far from over.
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story
- By Don on 09-26-14
By: Shyima Hall, and others
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The Unspeakable
- And Other Subjects of Discussion
- By: Meghan Daum
- Narrated by: Meghan Daum
- Length: 6 hrs and 48 mins
- Unabridged
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It's a report tempered by hard times. In "Matricide", Daum unflinchingly describes a parent's death and the uncomfortable emotions it provokes; and in "Diary of a Coma" she relates her own journey to the twilight of the mind. But Daum also operates in a comic register. With perfect precision, she reveals the absurdities of the marriage-industrial complex, of the New Age dating market, and of the peculiar habits of the young and digital.
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Complaining about her dead mom.
- By Erik Hermansen on 11-23-14
By: Meghan Daum
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Finding Me
- A Memoir
- By: Viola Davis
- Narrated by: Viola Davis
- Length: 9 hrs and 15 mins
- Unabridged
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In my book, you will meet a little girl named Viola who ran from her past until she made a life-changing decision to stop running forever. This is my story, from a crumbling apartment in Central Falls, Rhode Island, to the stage in New York City, and beyond. This is the path I took to finding my purpose but also my voice in a world that didn’t always see me.
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Absolutely beautifully Written❤️
- By Latwhit22 on 05-02-22
By: Viola Davis
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Becoming Ms. Burton
- From Prison to Recovery to Leading the Fight for Incarcerated Women
- By: Susan Burton, Cari Lynn
- Narrated by: Janina Edwards
- Length: 10 hrs and 38 mins
- Unabridged
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Susan Burton's world changed in an instant when her five-year-old son was killed by a van driving down their street. Consumed by grief and without access to professional help, Susan self-medicated, becoming addicted first to cocaine then to crack. As a resident of South Los Angeles, a Black community under siege in the War on Drugs, it was but a matter of time before Susan was arrested. She cycled in and out of prison for over 15 years; never was she offered therapy or treatment for addiction.
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Compelling
- By Jean on 06-18-17
By: Susan Burton, and others
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Pregnant Girl
- A Story of Teen Motherhood, College, and Creating a Better Future for Young Families
- By: Nicole Lynn Lewis
- Narrated by: Nicky Sunshine
- Length: 7 hrs and 28 mins
- Unabridged
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An activist calls for better support of young families so they can thrive and reflects on her experiences as a Black mother and college student fighting for opportunities for herself and her child. Pregnant Girl presents the possibility of a different future for young mothers - one of success and stability - in the midst of the dismal statistics that dominate the national conversation.
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Political
- By Amazon Customer on 01-16-23
What listeners say about Born Under the Gaslight
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Book enthusiast
- 10-12-21
Wonderful, painful, hopeful.
This story shows the life in a real light from the eyes of a child, to an adult learning to make due with life as it is now. Pain, and hopelessness turns into a thrill ride of new life and a journey to recovery. To anyone that struggles with BPD this is the book to see you are not alone.
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- Amberlynne
- 09-21-20
A refreshing new perspective, engaging read
I'm happy I downloaded this audiobook! As someone diagnosed with BPD it was nice hearing the ups and downs, and being able to relate to the author. This book is like pulling back the curtain on the thoughts of a person suffering with Borderline. It also really makes you think about how peoples actions effect others. 10/10 would highly recommend!
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1 person found this helpful
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- Helen G. Eaton
- 01-17-21
Insightful Memoir
Memoir was frank, honest, and a very gutsy thing to write. Definitely kept my attention. The narrator was engaging and easy to listen to.
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- Butterhands
- 09-18-20
A must read for anyone
Cindy Collins, has brought courage to a subject that so many are frightened to mention let alone talk about in detail; mental illness and it’s effects.
In this book she openly and in some cases, candidly talks about her own horrors of growing up with a malevolent and diabolical family who’s only goal was to hide their evils, and go on living as the “perfect white picket fence family”. Her book will systematically cut through all the “perfects” like a razor-blade of Truth, and expose you to an unimaginable life of pain and anguish.
As she finally reaches and confronts her diagnosis with Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD), in this book you can’t help feel a deeper understanding of what it must be like to carry on through the many levels- from living with your attackers, to a life of poverty, and to finally living an every day existence in a supposed “normal” safe society.
The reader in this book does a wonderful job taking you on this wild ride, that is in fact Cindy’s story. With every word putting you right there beside the author, and her hell-inspired demons, as she claws her way back to reach an acceptable level of humility to function again.
This book will show you to you always the importance of checking up on those we care for deeply, who may be living through corrupt hands of abuse and or from a mental illness that has been diagnosed or otherwise lurks inlabuse the back shadows of their mind.
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- Jason Marshall Thomas
- 09-13-20
Life Changing
I have consumed more self improvement non-fiction in my life than I can count, and this book is going to have more of an effect on me than everything else put together. Although I do not have BPD, I am on the trauma-caused "dissociation spectrum", and I can see so much of myself reflected in Cindy's story that it's kind of scary. On top of that, the reader poured so much emotion into the words that I would have thought it was Cindy herself, if I didn't know better. There's pain and anger in there that was moving. The very next book I have started on after this is a DBT workbook. I have a lot to unpack from inside myself after this book. If you had a narcissistic or neglectful parent, were bullied in school, or otherwise were subjected to emotional, physical, or sexual trauma as a child, you owe it to that wounded child inside yourself to listen to this book.
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- Baytown Anita
- 02-05-21
Horrible
This book is pure filth and highly offensive. It has no story to it and is dripping with hatred for the, ahem, author’s family
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