Girl in Need of a Tourniquet
Memoir of a Borderline Personality
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Narrated by:
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Erin Bennett
About this listen
An honest and compelling memoir, Girl in Need of a Tourniquet is Merri Lisa Johnson’s account of her borderline personality disorder and how it has affected her life and relationships. Johnson describes the feeling of "bleeding out" unable to tell where she stopped and where her partner began. A self-confessed "psycho girlfriend," she was influenced by many emotional factors from her past. She recalls her path through a dysfunctional, destructive relationship, while recounting the experiences that brought her to her breaking point.
In recognizing her struggle with borderline personality disorder, Johnson is ultimately able to seek help, embarking on a soul-searching healing process. It's a path that is painful, difficult, and at times heart-wrenching, but ultimately makes her more able to love and coexist in healthy relationships.
Download the accompanying reference guide.©2010 Merri Lisa Johnson (P)2014 Audible, Inc.Listeners also enjoyed...
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At a time when we mourn public figures and national tragedies with hashtags, where intimate posts about loss go viral and we receive automated birthday reminders for dead friends, it's clear we are navigating new terrain without a road map. Let's face it: Most of us have always had a difficult time talking about death and sharing our grief. We're awkward and uncertain; we avoid, ignore, or even deny feelings of sadness; we offer platitudes; we send sympathy bouquets whittled out of fruit.
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Not What I Was Expecting
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I'm Supposed to Protect You from All This
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For a long time, Nadja Spiegelman believed her mother was a fairy. More than her famous father, Maus creator Art Spiegelman, and even more than most mothers, hers - French-born New Yorker art director Françoise Mouly - exerted a force over reality that was both dazzling and daunting. As Nadja's body changed and "began to whisper to the adults around me in a language I did not understand", their relationship grew tense.
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Aweful
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What could possibly be “lucky” about addiction? Absolutely nothing, thought Laura McKowen when drinking brought her to her knees. As she puts it, she “kicked and screamed . . . wishing for something - anything - else” to be her issue. The people who got to drink normally, she thought, were so damn lucky. But in the midst of early sobriety, when no longer able to anesthetize her pain and anxiety, she realized that she was actually the lucky one. Lucky to feel her feelings, live honestly, really be with her daughter, change her legacy.
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Influencer Recovery, Part One
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Native Country of the Heart is the writer and activist Cherrie Moraga's love letter to her "unlettered" mother. It begins with her mother, Elvira Isabel Moraga, who as a child, along with her siblings, was hired out by her own father to pick cotton in California's Imperial Valley. The lives of Cherrie and her mother, and of their people, are woven together in a story of critical reflection and deep personal revelation as Moraga charts her own coming to consciousness alongside the heartbreaking story of her mother's decline.
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a must read for all chicanx
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Winner of a Pushcart Prize for poetry and an American Book Award for her short stories, Chitra Banerjee Divakaruni explores themes of women, immigration, and her vibrant Indian culture to great effect. Divakaruni expands on these ideas in One Amazing Thing, a project long in the making and full of electric prose.
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An ok way to kill some time
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On the outside, Terri Cheney was a highly successful, attractive Beverly Hills entertainment lawyer. But behind her seemingly flawless facade lay a dangerous secret - for the better part of her life, Cheney had been battling debilitating bipolar disorder and concealing a pharmacy's worth of prescriptions meant to stabilize her moods and make her "normal". In bursts of prose that mirror the devastating highs and extreme lows of her illness, Cheney describes her roller-coaster life with shocking honesty.
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Amazing
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A Happy Marriage is both intimate and expansive: It is the story of Enrique Sabas and his wife, Margaret, a novel that alternates between the romantic misadventures of the first weeks of their courtship and the final months of Margaret’s life as she says good-bye to her family, friends, children, and Enrique.
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A Difficult Review -- A Difficult Read
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Freshwater
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An extraordinary debut novel, Freshwater explores the surreal experience of having a fractured self. It centers around a young Nigerian woman, Ada, who develops separate selves within her as a result of being born "with one foot on the other side". Unsettling, heart-wrenching, dark, and powerful, Freshwater is a sharp evocation of a rare way of experiencing the world, one that illuminates how we all construct our identities. Ada begins her life in the south of Nigeria as a troubled baby and a source of deep concern to her family.
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Just ok.
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When Daphne Marist and her infant daughter, Chloe, pull up the gravel drive to the home of Daphne's new employer, it feels like they've entered a whole new world. Tucked in the Catskills, the stone mansion looks like something out of a fairy tale, its lush landscaping hiding the view of the mental asylum just beyond its border. Daphne secured the live-in position using an assumed name and fake credentials, telling no one that she's on the run from a controlling husband who has threatened to take her daughter away.
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Hard to follow
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As a hopeless and struggling indie rock musician, Ray Goldman's best chance of discovering any beauty and purpose in his dysfunctional life will come only when he ceases to struggle against life itself. Scale chronicles Ray Goldman’s journey downward through the adversarial trials that sometimes prove necessary in facilitating an eventual ascent into truth and happiness. The odd chapters of the novel find Ray, now a 31-year-old guitar player, seeking fulfillment in the wake of a life-altering tragedy.
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Poor Presentation
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What listeners say about Girl in Need of a Tourniquet
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- wranglerfever
- 03-29-19
awful
I didn't care for this book from three beginning. my therapist recommended it due to my recent attempt, it only made me want to try again.
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- Rhea L. Brunette
- 11-27-17
Related Immediately
I thought this book was like reading my own diary. I could relate immediately to the writers own story. So much helpful information and knowledge. I just finished and plan to listen again and take notes on my own thoughts and reactions to similar situations that have happened in my own life.
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2 people found this helpful
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- Dara Hoffman-Fox
- 09-07-17
A real gem of a discovery
The content of the book in and of itself is amazing. I enjoyed the combination of psychological research with the author's personal experiences. Since this was an audiobook there were times in which I was confused as to what was going on because the author goes back-and-forth between research and what sounds like poetry and then personal essay. I have a feeling it is easier to follow along with when reading the actual book. This did not detract from the overall experience too terribly much. At times the reader sounded like she was trying a little too hard to perform the book, but again not enough so to ruin the experience much.
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2 people found this helpful
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- LD
- 08-06-16
Not your typical mental illness memoir
In witty, sardonic, heart-piercing language and brutal honesty, Merri Lisa Johnson both represents and deconstructs "borderline personality disorder". She talks back to clinical definitions, challenges pathologizing language, and reveals the humanity, suffering, and hope behind one of the most stigmatized diagnoses. A crucial read for anyone interested in BPD, but prepare to let go of your preconceptions. You might be left with more questions than answers, and I think that's a good thing.
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3 people found this helpful
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- Heather Prater
- 02-24-19
Pretty good
It was a bit hard to follow. I enjoyed pretty much every aspect of it, though over half of it is her quoting other authors, musicians, or professionals in the psychology field. It's nice as someone who can't really relate to hear a story like this from the point of view of someone going through it. It helps me to understand what type of things may be going on inside of the mind of someone with BPD, when I otherwise would have had no idea- which was kind of the entire reason I chose this book.
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1 person found this helpful
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- Nermel1982
- 06-07-23
Mirror of my life
I was diagnosed with BPD 20 years ago. I don't know if it is the fact that I also have BPD or not but I followed along this book without much of an issue and had so many points where I said that's my life, that's me. I've often said I should write a book about my life, that someone out there would read it and now I definitely think they would,. It definitely left me feeling a little less "crazy" at the end of the day because I know exactly how she felt so much of the time.
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- Amazon Customer
- 04-26-21
Hard to follow
The story is very hard to follow until the last chapter. Maybe this was done to show that the author’s clarity of thought or lack of clarity. I almost stopped listening halfway through because it was so disjointed at times, but I did want to find out how it ended. I think the story is ok, but again, very hard to follow.
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- BRB
- 04-02-14
Chaotic, disturbing, meaningless
I am a professor of psychology and thought this would be informative and interesting, but I must be honest to say that I did not understand what was going on. I am not a clinician, but I do teach about personality and attachment. This was a stream of consciousness with little grounding in time or space. I guess that may been what the author was getting at, she does have a psychiatric disorder, but after an hour of listening, I realized I wasn't going to learn anything and was not going to be entertained. I gave up. Wish I could return it. If you want to read a good memoir of a person who is grappling with a mental health disorder, read Andrew Solomon's "The Noonday Demon." He is knowledgeable, a terrific writer, and gives a very compelling account of how depression affects all aspects of a person's life, but also the gifts one receives as a result of this struggle. The reader ends up admiring Solomon, liking him, and wanting to learn more about his life.
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4 people found this helpful