Charlotte Illes Is Not a Detective
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Narrated by:
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Katie Siegel
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By:
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Katie Siegel
About this listen
“An immensely fun, voice-y read with a twisty mystery.” –Mia P. Manansala, author of the Agatha, Anthony, and Macavity Award-winning Arsenic and Adobo
“Charlotte is a delight.”—The New York Times
For anyone seeking to satisfy their Harriet the Spy, Encyclopedia Brown, or Nancy Drew nostalgia, this charming, entertaining debut based on the popular @katiefliesaway TikTok series stars a twentysomething former kid detective who’s coaxed out of retirement for one last case.
The downside of being a famous child detective is that sooner or later, you have to grow up . . .
As a kid, Charlotte Illes’ uncanny sleuthing abilities made her a minor celebrity. But in high school, she hung up her detective’s hat and stashed away the signature blue landline in her “office”—aka garage—convinced that finding her adult purpose would be as easy as tracking down missing pudding cups or locating stolen diamonds.
Now twenty-five, Charlotte has a nagging fear that she hit her peak in middle school. She’s living with her mom, scrolling through job listings, and her love life consists mostly of first dates. When it comes to knowing what to do next, Charlotte hasn’t got a clue.
And then, her old blue phone rings . . .
Reluctantly, Charlotte is pulled back into the mystery-solving world she knew—just one more time. But that world is a whole lot more complicated for an adult. As a kid, she was able to crack the case and still get her homework done on time. Now she’s dealing with dead bodies, missing persons, and villains who actually see her as a viable threat. And the detective skills she was once so eager to never use again are the only things that can stop a killer ready to make sure her next retirement is permanent . . .
“Kept me guessing and left me with a warm and happy glow.” –Mary Robinette Kowal, author of the Hugo, Nebula, and Locus Award-winning The Calculating Stars
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Story
Kat and Stevie - best friends, theater kids, polar opposites - have snuck away from the suburbs to spend a night in New York City. They have it all planned out. They’ll see a play, eat at the city’s hottest restaurant, and have the best. Night. Ever. What could go wrong? Well. Kind of a lot? They’re barely off the train before they’re dealing with destroyed phones, family drama, and unexpected Pomeranians. Over the next few hours, they’ll have to grapple with old flames, terrible theater, and unhelpful cab drivers. But there are also cute boys to kiss, parties to crash....
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Amazing Second Reader
- By 26kmf on 06-01-21
By: Morgan Matson
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The Solid Grounds Coffee Company
- By: Carla Laureano
- Narrated by: Teri Schnaubelt
- Length: 11 hrs and 16 mins
- Unabridged
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Analyn Sanchez can handle the long hours and arrogant clients that come with her job as a crisis management associate at Denver’s largest publicity firm. But when she’s asked to cover up a client’s misdeeds with serious moral and legal ramifications, she can no longer sacrifice her conscience for her career...and the cost is no less than her job. Ever since a devastating climbing accident in South America eight months ago, and a bad decision that dried up his sponsorships, professional rock climber Bryan Shaw has found himself at similar loose ends.
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5+ stars: Best for last! (with a religious caveat)
- By Vibliophile on 02-05-23
By: Carla Laureano
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Curiosity Thrilled the Cat
- A Magical Cats Mystery
- By: Sofie Kelly
- Narrated by: Cassandra Campbell
- Length: 10 hrs and 28 mins
- Unabridged
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When librarian Kathleen Paulson moved to Mayville Heights, Minnesota, she had no idea that two strays would nuzzle their way into her life. Owen is a tabby with a catnip addiction and Hercules is a stocky tuxedo cat who shares Kathleen's fondness for Barry Manilow. But beyond all the fur and purrs, there's something more to these felines. When murder interrupts Mayville's Music Festival, Kathleen finds herself the prime suspect.
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Promising "Cozy" Series
- By Chalis on 07-11-14
By: Sofie Kelly
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The Frame-Up
- The Golden Arrow Mysteries Series, Book 1
- By: Meghan Scott Molin
- Narrated by: Andrea Emmes
- Length: 10 hrs and 18 mins
- Unabridged
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MG Martin lives and breathes geek culture. She works as a writer for the comic book company she idolized as a kid. But despite her love of hooded vigilantes, MG prefers her comics stay on the page. But when someone in LA starts recreating crime scenes from her favorite comic book, MG is the LAPD’s best - and only - lead. She recognizes the golden arrow left at the scene as the calling card of her favorite comic book hero. The thing is…superheroes aren’t real. Are they? When Detective Kildaire asks for her comic book expertise, MG is more than up for the adventure.
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Hit or Miss, Saved by the Narrator
- By Dubi on 02-06-19
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Tagged for Death
- A Sarah Winston Garage Sale Mystery
- By: Sherry Harris
- Narrated by: Hillary Huber
- Length: 8 hrs and 4 mins
- Unabridged
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Starting your life over at age 38 isn't easy, but that's what Sarah Winston finds herself facing when her husband CJ runs off with a 19-year-old temptress named Tiffany. Sarah's self-prescribed therapy happily involves hitting all the garage and tag sales in and around her small town in Massachusetts. But after returning from a particularly successful day searching for yard-sale treasures, Sarah finds a grisly surprise in one of her bags: a freshly bloodied shirt...that undoubtedly belongs to her ex, CJ, who now happens to be Ellington's chief of police. And Tiffany has gone missing.
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frustrating book
- By Anonymous User on 01-08-23
By: Sherry Harris
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Innocent in Las Vegas
- A Humorous Tiffany Black Mystery
- By: A. R. Winters
- Narrated by: Erin Moon
- Length: 5 hrs and 4 mins
- Unabridged
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Cupcake-loving croupier Tiffany Black is determined to leave her job at the casino for good. She's one small step away from acquiring her private investigator license and has her eye on the prize. Accepting her first real case - investigating the murder of casino-mogul Ethan Becker - should be exciting. Instead, things spiral out of control, and Tiffany finds herself in over her head as she confronts secretive suspects, corrupt casino henchmen, and a bodyguard with a mysterious past.
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Terrible narration
- By JuliBuli on 01-02-24
By: A. R. Winters
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Bad Habits
- By: Amy Gentry
- Narrated by: Rebecca Lowman
- Length: 10 hrs and 16 mins
- Unabridged
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Claire "Mac" Woods—a professor enjoying her newfound hotshot status at an academic conference—finally has the acceptance and admiration she has long craved. But at the conference's hotel bar, Mac is surprised to run into a face from a past she'd rather forget: the moneyed, effortlessly perfect Gwendolyn Whitney, Mac's foil, rival, and former best friend.
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Outstanding!
- By SLuzaz on 02-15-21
By: Amy Gentry
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You Say It First
- By: Katie Cotugno
- Narrated by: Jorjeana Marie, Kirby Heyborne
- Length: 8 hrs and 49 mins
- Unabridged
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One conversation can change everything. Meg has her entire life set up perfectly: She and her best friend, Emily, plan to head to Cornell together in the fall, and she works at a voter registration call center in her Philadelphia suburb. But everything changes when one of those calls connects her to a stranger from small-town Ohio.
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Good for a placeholder
- By KJzCola on 07-16-21
By: Katie Cotugno
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The Scent of Murder
- The Jazz Ramsey Mysteries, Book 1
- By: Kylie Logan
- Narrated by: Emily Pike Stewart
- Length: 8 hrs and 11 mins
- Unabridged
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The way Jazz Ramsey figures it, life is pretty good. She is 35 years old and owns her own home in one of Cleveland's most diverse, artsy, and interesting neighborhoods. She has a job she likes as an administrative assistant at an all-girls school and a volunteer interest that she's passionate about - Jazz is a cadaver dog handler. Jazz is working with Luther, a cadaver dog in training. Luther is still learning cadaver work, so Jazz is putting him through his paces at an abandoned building. When Luther signals a find, Jazz is stunned to see the body of a young woman.
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The cover is a sham. Dogs not involved.
- By Horse Rider on 06-21-21
By: Kylie Logan
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Lights Out Lucy
- A Music City Rollers Novel
- By: Elicia Hyder
- Narrated by: Callie Dalton
- Length: 10 hrs and 26 mins
- Unabridged
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I can't say they didn't warn me. Right now, I realize: I probably should have listened. Because if there's anyone who has no business playing a sport that requires a helmet, pads, and a liability waiver, it's this girl. The same girl who once knocked herself out during a game of backyard baseball. I stepped up to the plate, pulled the bat back a little too far to swing, and clocked myself in the back of the skull. Boom. Lights Out Lucy. That's how I got my roller derby name. So yeah. Maybe I should have known better.
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Wonderfully smart laugh out loud story
- By RC18 on 05-16-18
By: Elicia Hyder
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Where I Left Her
- By: Amber Garza
- Narrated by: Vivienne Leheny
- Length: 9 hrs and 8 mins
- Unabridged
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Whitney had some misgivings when she dropped her increasingly moody teenage daughter, Amelia, off at Lauren’s house. She’d never met the parents, and usually she’d go in, but Amelia clearly wasn’t going to let something so humiliating happen, so instead Whitney waved to her daughter before pulling away from the little house with the roses in front. But when she goes back the next day, an elderly couple answers the door - Amelia and Lauren aren’t there, and this couple swears they never were, that she’s at the wrong house.
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Kept me guessing!!
- By Sheppardspie on 09-13-21
By: Amber Garza
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Rules for Being a Girl
- By: Candace Bushnell, Katie Cotugno
- Narrated by: Julia Whelan
- Length: 6 hrs and 3 mins
- Unabridged
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It starts before you can even remember: You learn the rules for being a girl.... Marin has always been good at navigating these unspoken guidelines. A star student and editor of the school paper, she dreams of getting into Brown University. Marin’s future seems bright - and her young, charismatic English teacher, Mr. Beckett, is always quick to admire her writing and talk books with her. But when “Bex” takes things too far and comes on to Marin, she’s shocked and horrified. Had she somehow led him on? Was it her fault?
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THE BEST BOOK I HAVE EVER READ!
- By Laya Fisher on 04-11-20
By: Candace Bushnell, and others
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Roseland, Volume 1
- By: Eric Ugland
- Narrated by: Candace Thaxton
- Length: 16 hrs and 14 mins
- Unabridged
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When Ginger Mitchell finds out her mother committed suicide, she drives her cherry-red SUV straight home to Portland. Murders are being passed off as suicides. College-aged women keep going missing. And then there's the troubling spate of mobsters who keep inviting her out to eat. Includes the first six novellas in the Roseland series, Home Is Where the Start Is, The Ruth Is Out There, The Body in the Pool, Amber Alert, Jane Dead, and Welcome to Roseland.
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Holy Shit! Ugland you go boy!
- By Amazon Customer on 10-12-20
By: Eric Ugland
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56 Days
- By: Catherine Ryan Howard
- Narrated by: Alana Kerr Collins
- Length: 10 hrs and 39 mins
- Unabridged
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Ciara and Oliver meet in a supermarket queue in Dublin and start dating the same week COVID-19 reaches Irish shores. When lockdown threatens to keep them apart, Oliver suggests they move in together. Ciara sees a unique opportunity for a relationship to flourish without the scrutiny of family and friends. Oliver sees a chance to hide who - and what - he really is.
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A bit disappointing
- By SB on 08-18-21
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I Loved You First
- Anthology
- By: Molly Harper, Suzanne Enoch, Karen Hawkins
- Narrated by: Amanda Ronconi
- Length: 8 hrs and 19 mins
- Unabridged
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Escape with three warm-hearted romantic comedy novellas about women’s second chances at first love from beloved romance authors Suzanne Enoch, Molly Harper, and Karen Hawkins.
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For People Who Love Second Chances
- By Tanisha on 08-27-20
By: Molly Harper, and others
What listeners say about Charlotte Illes Is Not a Detective
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Deb on the Hudson
- 01-05-24
Nothing about this story was outstanding. 
I can’t believe what a boring and predictable mystery this was. The action was very slow and not at all interesting. I have no idea why I actually finished it, but I kept hoping that maybe the writing would get better. Not! It may be a young adult level story, but I can’t imagine it would be that interesting for that age group, either. Not at all interested in finding any other works by this author. Just my opinion, as it may appeal to someone looking for a very simple story without any real violence, although there were a small number of “language” words.
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- Amazon Customer
- 12-23-23
Fun mystery
I liked the characters. The book is a fun and funny listen . The mystery isn’t hard to figure out, but it felt more like it was really about the friendships which I really enjoyed. I would read more by this author. She also did great as the narrator (and I almost never like it when an author narrates their own work). I think another review said there was bad language, i don’t really care about that but I didn’t notice anything? Maybe I missed it? But trigger warning for those that need it: not everyone in the book is a cis straight person. So if that will upset you this might not be the book for you. But I thought it was delightful and highly recommend it.
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1 person found this helpful
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- AmandaFMascio
- 01-03-24
Cute, fun story. Cummy narration.
I did enjoy this story. The author has a fun, conversational manner which I enjoyed. However, there's a reason for professional narrators. Most authors are not meant to read their audiobooks... which is why there are professionals who do voiceovers. She isn't able to create voices for each character and my 12 year old begged me to put on headphones because "ugh, that voice is horrible". Sorry, but I agree with her assessment. I usually throw in the towel with lousy narration, but I really did enjoy the story and kept with it.
I would very much suggest reading this title versus listening. I will look for her works in the Kindle version going forward.
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1 person found this helpful
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- M. L. P.
- 02-23-24
Just slow and boring
I want interested in the mystery. Too many unimportant characters. Not much happened. I gave up. DNF
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- bosco
- 01-06-24
Too Many Witty Diversions
First of all, there is a lot to like about this story. The author did a really good job of developing a handful of unique and interesting characters. In addition, the author does a really good job with character conversations. They seem realistic and you can visualize the conversation in your head. The main character, Charlotte, also has a really good talent putting together clues.
The frustrating part of the book is the author’s witty diversions that seemed to be added every time the story takes off and gets interesting. It forces the listener to pause, become frustrated and have to wait a minute or two for the story to flow again. It’s like being interrupted in the middle of a good conversation. In the meantime, the witty diversion adds nothing to the story. I wouldn’t cut them all out, but dial them back if there is a sequel.
In some ways, this story seems like to me is a script for a handful of 30 minute TV sitcom episodes. I think it would be a hit.
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- Theresa D.
- 01-07-24
Authors should not read
The story was good enough to keep me listening but I had to take breaks and listen to overs and come back to it. The author is not good enough to pull off reading it and many times I contemplated quitting.
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- roseanna banana
- 12-24-23
Interesting but they are more like kids.
It was interesting but kind of slow moving. I liked the characters and the humor. it just seemed to drag in places. The narration was pretty good.
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- Nina
- 01-12-24
Another boring tale of woke-ness
Not a particularly interesting mystery and most of the characters inhabit some portion of the LGBTQ community. No sex, but lots of lifestyle which was pretty gratuitous in my opinion. None of it is really a factor in the story, Charlotte has to grapple with the idea that her life may have peaked in middle school. Apparently, she was a bright and motivated student, but where she really excelled was in solving mysteries. Now as a 20-something, she wants something different to do with her life, but has not found anything else quite so fulfilling or as much fun. Why she didn’t just find a job that involves solving puzzles is beyond me. All this angst about no longer being a detective was just irritating. There are lots of such jobs out there including the obvious police departments or private detective agencies, but also things like investigative journalism, forensic accounting, data security or even pathology which could have provided that same sense of gratification. The whole story is just kind of dumb. As for the performance, there is a reason that professional actors usually narrate audiobooks. The author here is simply not up to the task.
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- Brett M. Stevens
- 10-12-23
Don’t recommend
The mystery was there but it was overcome by lots of unnecessary foul language. Too bad
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62 people found this helpful
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- L. Garcia
- 01-13-24
Not for me, I was bored
The story dragged on and fell flat. I wasn’t excited to keep listening. I just wanted to get it over with.
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