Elias Zapple's Rhymes from the Cabbage Patch (Zany, Funny, Illustrated Poems For Ages 9+ Book 1)
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Narrated by:
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Richard Mann
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By:
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Elias Zapple
About this listen
Inside this audiobook, you will find:
- Funny nonsense from my mind
- Zany rhymes and slimy tales
- Creepy crawlies leaving bloody trails
- And a clever slug that shocks
- Tales about Cinders and Goldilocks
- Cabbages, slugs and Elias Zapple
- What rhymes with Zapple apart from apple?
- Fun and craziness! (You'll have a good time),
- There's even some that do not rhyme!
Listen to the book, there's so much more. Or my slugs and I will go to war! Fun and zany rhymes for preteens.
©2014 Elias Zapple (P)2014 Elias ZappleListeners also enjoyed...
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Story
Eleven-year-old Nikolas - nicknamed "Christmas" - has received only one toy in his life: a doll carved out of a turnip. But he's happy with his turnip doll, because it came from his parents, who love him. Then one day his father goes missing, and Nikolas must travel to the North Pole to save him. Along the way Nikolas befriends a surly reindeer, bests a troublesome troll, and discovers a hidden world of enchantment in the frozen village of Elfhelm.
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Wonderful magical story!
- By Twin Cities gal on 01-01-18
By: Matt Haig
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The World's Largest Man
- A Memoir
- By: Harrison Scott Key
- Narrated by: Harrison Scott Key
- Length: 9 hrs and 4 mins
- Unabridged
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Harrison Scott Key was born in Memphis, but he grew up in Mississippi, among pious, Bible-reading women and men who either shot things or got women pregnant. At the center of his world was his larger-than-life father - a hunter, a fighter, and a football coach. Harrison, with his love of books and excessive interest in hugging, couldn't have been less like Pop, and when it became clear that he was not able to kill anything very well or otherwise make his father happy, he resolved to become everything his father was not.
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I laughed every day to and from work. Loved it!
- By KufRN on 06-06-18
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Ellen Foster
- By: Kaye Gibbons
- Narrated by: Ruth Ann Phimister
- Length: 3 hrs and 51 mins
- Unabridged
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"When I was little I would think of ways to kill my daddy. I would figure out this or that way and run it down through my head until it got easy." So begins the tale of Ellen Foster, the brave and engaging heroine of Kaye Gibbons's first novel, which won the Sue Kaufman Prize from the American Academy and Institute of Arts and Letters. Wise, funny, affectionate and true, Ellen Foster is, as Walker Percy called it, "The real thing. Which is to say, a lovely, sometimes heart/wrenching novel...."
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Great!!
- By Jo on 04-06-18
By: Kaye Gibbons
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Oldest Living Confederate Widow Tells All
- By: Allan Gurganus
- Narrated by: Barbara McCulloh
- Length: 49 hrs and 54 mins
- Unabridged
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Allan Gurganus's Oldest Living Confederate Widow Tells All became an instant classic upon its publication. Critics and fans alike fell in love with the voice of 99-year-old Confederate widow Lucy Marsden, one of the most entertaining and loquacious heroines in American literature. Lucy married at the turn of the 20th century, when she was 15 and her husband was 50. If Colonel William Marsden was a veteran of the "War for Southern Independence", Lucy became a "veteran of the veteran" with a unique perspective on Southern history and Southern manhood.
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Dated.
- By edie butler on 04-06-21
By: Allan Gurganus
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The Hearing Trumpet
- By: Leonora Carrington
- Narrated by: Siân Phillips
- Length: 6 hrs and 47 mins
- Unabridged
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Surreal and splendidly unconventional, The Hearing Trumpet is an apocalyptic fairy-tale quest about an occult old ladies' home and the spry nonagenarian who ends up there. After coming into possession of a hearing trumpet, 92-year-old Marian Leatherby discovers her son's plans to send her to a nursing home. But this is no ordinary place.... Here there are strange rituals, orgiastic nuns, levitating abbesses, animalistic humans, humanistic animals, a search for the Holy Grail, and a plan to escape to Lapland and knit a tent....
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fantastical ride
- By Edward Berry on 01-12-21
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First Lessons
- Medieval Tale 1
- By: Lina J. Potter
- Narrated by: Tiffany Morgan
- Length: 10 hrs
- Unabridged
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Being a genius Medical school graduate and a sporty and active girl, Aliya dies suddenly in a car accident... only to find herself reborn in a completely different body in the middle of a half-ruined castle during Medieval times. While confused and dismayed, Aliya realizes she has been given a second chance in life - so she rolls up her sleeves and gets to work on restoring the castle and her new life.
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Reads like a high school project
- By P on 07-04-20
By: Lina J. Potter
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Nanny McPhee and The Big Bang
- By: Emma Thompson
- Narrated by: Emma Thompson
- Length: 5 hrs and 22 mins
- Unabridged
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Nominated for a 2011 Grammy Award for Best Spoken Word Album For Children. Who better to read the novel of the new Nanny McPhee film than Nanny McPhee herself, Emma Thompson, who also wrote both the screenplay and the novel. This delightful audio edition captures the magic and the mayhem of Nanny McPhee’s brand new adventure – it will have you laughing out loud!
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Story+Film Diary+Emma Thompson=Joy
- By Pam M on 08-02-17
By: Emma Thompson
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KooKooLand
- A Memoir
- By: Gloria Norris
- Narrated by: Gloria Norris
- Length: 14 hrs and 27 mins
- Unabridged
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Gloria Norris grew up in the projects of Manchester, New Hampshire, with her parents; her sister, Virginia; and her cat, Sylvester. A snapshot might show a happy young family, but only a dummkopf would buy that. Nine-year-old Gloria is gutsy and wisecracking. Her father, Jimmy, all dazzle and danger, is often on the far side of the law and makes his own rules - which everyone else better follow. Gloria's mom, Shirley, tries not to rock the boat, Virginia unwisely defies Jimmy, and Gloria fashions herself into his sidekick - the son he never had.
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this was so awful I could only listen to a little
- By Wyowoman on 09-14-18
By: Gloria Norris
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The Town House
- By: Norah Lofts
- Narrated by: Juliet Prague, Martyn Read
- Length: 17 hrs and 22 mins
- Unabridged
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"It was in the first week of October in the year 1391 that I first came face to face with the man who owned me… the man whose lightest word was to us, his villeins, weightier than the King’s law or the edicts of our Holy Father…” So began the story of Martin Reed - a serf whose resentment of the automatic rule of his feudal lord finally flared into open defiance.
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Another winner by Norah Lofts
- By Bird Lady 147 on 10-03-17
By: Norah Lofts
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The Fat Man
- A Tale of North Pole Noir
- By: Ken Harmon
- Narrated by: Johnny Heller
- Length: 5 hrs and 29 mins
- Unabridged
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Fired from his longtime job as captain of the Coal Patrol, two-foot-three-inch, 1,300-year-old elf Gumdrop Coal is angry. He's one of Santa's original elves, inspired by the fat man's vision to bring joy to children on that one special day each year. But somewhere along the way, things went sour for Gumdrop. Maybe it was delivering one too many lumps of coal for the Naughty List. Maybe it's the conspiracy against Christmas that he's starting to sense down every chimney.
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Fantastic Holiday Listen
- By PastorJim on 12-17-10
By: Ken Harmon
What listeners say about Elias Zapple's Rhymes from the Cabbage Patch (Zany, Funny, Illustrated Poems For Ages 9+ Book 1)
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Don
- 10-30-14
Wacky, wild and zany!
Would you consider the audio edition of Elias Zapple's Rhymes from the Cabbage Patch (Zany, Funny, Illustrated Poems For Ages 9+ Book 1) to be better than the print version?
Although this audio edition by itself is enthralling and entertaining it also compliments the print edition perfectly!
What other book might you compare Elias Zapple's Rhymes from the Cabbage Patch (Zany, Funny, Illustrated Poems For Ages 9+ Book 1) to and why?
This book is comparable to work by Roald Dahl but it is very original and laced with Elias Zapple's twisted sense of humor!
Which scene was your favorite?
I love Elias Zapple's take on classic nursery rhymes. They are very off the wall and funny!
If you were to make a film of this book, what would the tag line be?
Zany, zany and even more zany!
Any additional comments?
I really enjoyed listening to this and will many times!
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- Convoke
- 12-09-14
Fifty Minutes of Unadulterated Fun in Zapple-world
What made the experience of listening to Elias Zapple's Rhymes from the Cabbage Patch (Zany, Funny, Illustrated Poems For Ages 9+ Book 1) the most enjoyable?
The combination of Zapple's zany mind and Richard Mann's playful delivery is perfect for this humorous and inventive odyssey.
Who was your favorite character and why?
I love Zapple's slugs. Shall I tell you about the slug that shocks? Nah, better make you listen for yourself. Cinders and Goldilocks came a close second, but I am a Zapple slug fan. As Zapple shows you slugs as you've never thought to consider them, she transports you to a world where the commonplace becomes extraordinary.
Which scene was your favorite?
I can't call out a single scene, since the book is so well conceived and executed. But I should warn you about the creepy-crawlies and their bloody trails. (That's a hint.)
Did you have an extreme reaction to this book? Did it make you laugh or cry?
This book removed me from the commonplace, lightened my load, and made me happy when I really needed some relief. Highly recommended for its ability to totally transmute reality and you with it.
Any additional comments?
Loved it. Long live Zapple, slugs and all.
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