
Fi
A Memoir
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Narrated by:
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Alexandra Fuller
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By:
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Alexandra Fuller
About this listen
From the award-winning New York Times bestselling author, Alexandra Fuller, comes a career defining memoir about grieving the sudden loss of her twenty-one-year-old child
“Fair to say, I was in a ribald state the summer before my fiftieth birthday.” And so begins Alexandra Fuller’s open, vivid new memoir, Fi. It’s midsummer in Wyoming and Alexandra is barely hanging on. Grieving her father and pining for her home country of Zimbabwe, reeling from a midlife breakup, freshly sober and piecing her way uncertainly through a volatile new relationship with a younger woman, Alexandra vows to get herself back on even keel.
And then—suddenly and incomprehensibly—her son Fi, at twenty-one years old, dies in his sleep.
No stranger to loss—young siblings, a parent, a home country—Alexandra is nonetheless leveled. At the same time, she is painfully aware that she cannot succumb and abandon her two surviving daughters as her mother before her had done. From a sheep wagon deep in the mountains of Wyoming to a grief sanctuary in New Mexico to a silent meditation retreat in Alberta, Canada, Alexandra journeys up and down the spine of the Rocky Mountains in an attempt to find how to grieve herself whole. There is no answer, and there are countless answers—in poetry, in rituals and routines, in nature and in the indigenous wisdom she absorbed as a child in Zimbabwe. By turns disarming, devastating and—unexpectedly, blessedly funny, Alexandra recounts the wild medicine of painstakingly grieving a child in a culture that has no instructions for it.
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Story
Set in the early 1950s, this latest novel from Pulitzer Prize and National Book Award finalist Gayl Jones follows the witty but perplexing army veteran Buddy Ray Guy as he embodies the fate of Black soldiers who return, not in glory, but into their Jim Crow communities. A cook and tractor repairman, Buddy was known as Budweiser to his army pals because he’s a wise guy. But underneath that surface, he is a true self-educated intellectual and a classic seeker: looking for religion, looking for meaning, looking for love.
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words,the thinking of urban blacks that migrated north
- By brighteye on 05-13-25
By: Gayl Jones
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Headshot
- A Novel
- By: Rita Bullwinkel
- Narrated by: Cassandra Campbell
- Length: 5 hrs and 24 mins
- Unabridged
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An unexpected tragedy at a community pool. A family’s unrelenting expectation of victory. The desire to gain or lose control; to make time speed up or stop; to be frighteningly, undeniably good at something. Each of the eight teenage girl boxers in this blistering debut novel has her own reasons for the sacrifices she has made to come to Reno, Nevada, to compete to be named the best in the country.
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Wonderful Narrator
- By love it on 08-09-24
By: Rita Bullwinkel
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The Last Resort
- A Memoir of Mischief and Mayhem on a Family Farm in Africa
- By: Douglas Rogers
- Narrated by: Kevin Hanssen
- Length: 12 hrs and 32 mins
- Unabridged
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Born and raised in Zimbabwe, Douglas Rogers is the son of White farmers living through that country's long and tense transition from postcolonial rule. He escaped the dull future mapped out for him by his parents for one of adventure and excitement in Europe and the United States. But when Zimbabwe's President Robert Mugabe launched his violent program to reclaim White-owned land and Rogers' parents were caught in the cross fire, everything changed.
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Five stars for Drifters
- By BonnyDune on 03-26-25
By: Douglas Rogers
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Quiet Until the Thaw
- A Novel
- By: Alexandra Fuller
- Narrated by: Alma Cuervo
- Length: 4 hrs and 44 mins
- Unabridged
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Lakota Oglala Sioux Nation, South Dakota. Two Native American cousins, Rick Overlooking Horse and You Choose Watson, though bound by blood and by land, find themselves at odds as they grapple with the implications of their shared heritage. When escalating anger toward the injustices, historical and current, inflicted upon the Lakota people by the federal government leads to tribal divisions and infighting, the cousins go in separate directions: Rick chooses the path of peace; You Choose, violence.
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Loved this best narration ever
- By Liliana Condon on 06-04-21
By: Alexandra Fuller
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The Harder I Fight the More I Love You
- A Memoir
- By: Neko Case
- Narrated by: Neko Case
- Length: 7 hrs and 1 min
- Unabridged
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Neko Case has long been revered as one of music’s most influential artists, whose authenticity, lyrical storytelling, and sly wit have endeared her to a legion of critics, musicians, and lifelong fans. In The Harder I Fight the More I Love You, Case brings her trademark candor and precision to a memoir that traces her evolution from an invisible girl “raised by two dogs and a space heater” in rural Washington state to her improbable emergence as an internationally acclaimed talent.
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The ending
- By Katherine Phillips on 04-28-25
By: Neko Case
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I Am on the Hit List
- A Journalist's Murder and the Rise of Autocracy in India
- By: Rollo Romig
- Narrated by: Rollo Romig
- Length: 13 hrs and 50 mins
- Unabridged
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When Gauri Lankesh, an outspoken journalist in the South Indian city of Bangalore, was assassinated in September 2017 outside her home, it wasn’t just a loss to her close-knit community of writers and activists—the shock reverberated nationwide, making headlines and sparking mass protests. Why was she targeted, and who was behind it? Following the case to its stunning, unsettling conclusion, Rollo Romig uncovers a world of political extremists, fearless writers, organized crime, and shadowy religious groups.
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Fantastic book
- By esther on 05-18-25
By: Rollo Romig
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Native Nations
- A Millennium in North America
- By: Kathleen DuVal
- Narrated by: Carolina Hoyos
- Length: 21 hrs and 30 mins
- Unabridged
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A magisterial history of Indigenous North America that places the power of Native nations at its center, telling their story from the rise of ancient cities more than a thousand years ago to fights for sovereignty that continue today. Long before the colonization of North America, Indigenous Americans built diverse civilizations and adapted to a changing world in ways that reverberated globally. And, as award-winning historian Kathleen DuVal vividly recounts, when Europeans did arrive, no civilization came to a halt because of a few wandering explorers, even when the strangers came well armed.
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An outstanding survey with many surprises
- By L Dickson on 06-05-24
By: Kathleen DuVal
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Legacy
- A Black Physician Reckons with Racism in Medicine
- By: Uché Blackstock MD
- Narrated by: Uché Blackstock MD
- Length: 8 hrs and 6 mins
- Unabridged
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Growing up in Brooklyn, New York, it never occurred to Uché Blackstock and her twin sister, Oni, that they would be anything but physicians. In the 1980s, their mother headed an organization of Black women physicians, and for years the girls watched these fiercely intelligent women in white coats tend to their patients and neighbors, host community health fairs, cure ills, and save lives.
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I Feel Validated!
- By Lisa M Walker on 07-13-24
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House of Kwa
- By: Mimi Kwa
- Narrated by: Mimi Kwa
- Length: 10 hrs and 51 mins
- Unabridged
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Mimi Kwa ignored the letter for days. When she finally opened it, the news was so shocking her hair turned grey. Why would a father sue his own daughter? The collision was over the estate of Mimi's beloved Aunt Theresa, but its seed had been sown long ago. In an attempt to understand how it had come to this, Mimi unspools her rich family history in House of Kwa.
By: Mimi Kwa
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All the Parts We Exile
- By: Roza Nozari
- Narrated by: Roza Nozari
- Length: 8 hrs and 34 mins
- Unabridged
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As the youngest of three daughters, and the only one born in Canada soon after her parents' emigration from Iran, Roza Nozari began her life hungry for a sense of belonging. From her early years, she shared a passion for Iranian cuisine with her mother and craved stories of their ancestral home. Eventually they visited and she fell in love with its sights and smells, and with the warm embrace of their extended family. Yet Roza sensed something was amiss with her mother's happy, well-rehearsed story of their original departure.
By: Roza Nozari
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Men Have Called Her Crazy
- A Memoir
- By: Anna Marie Tendler
- Narrated by: Anna Marie Tendler
- Length: 8 hrs and 39 mins
- Unabridged
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In early 2021, popular artist Anna Marie Tendler checked herself into a psychiatric hospital following a year of crippling anxiety, depression and self-harm. Over two weeks, she underwent myriad psychological tests, participated in numerous therapy sessions, connected with fellow patients and experienced profound breakthroughs, such as when a doctor noted, “There is a you inside that feels invisible to those looking at you from the outside.”
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Felt incomplete
- By Anonymous User on 08-21-24
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Hunger Makes Me a Modern Girl
- A Memoir
- By: Carrie Brownstein
- Narrated by: Carrie Brownstein
- Length: 7 hrs and 4 mins
- Unabridged
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From the guitarist of the pioneering band Sleater-Kinney, the book Kim Gordon says "everyone has been waiting for" and a New York Times Notable Book of 2015 - a candid, funny, and deeply personal look at making a life - and finding yourself - in music. Before Carrie Brownstein became a music icon, she was a young girl growing up in the Pacific Northwest just as it was becoming the setting for one the most important movements in rock history.
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fussy
- By Ex on 01-09-16
Dissection of grief
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Heartbreaking and beautiful.
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Phenomenal Fi
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Profound and important
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Lyrical, poetic and poignant- I would rewind so as not to miss a single word.
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Honest
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Sweet, deep, perfect
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Lifting the fog
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Raw and beautiful
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The writing
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