
The Harder I Fight the More I Love You
A Memoir
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Narrated by:
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Neko Case
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By:
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Neko Case
About this listen
From a beloved Grammy-nominated musician, a "heartbreaking and funny" memoir of a poverty-stricken childhood, obsessive desires, and indispensable friendships that reflects on the way art and music and a deep connection to nature guided her journey towards stardom (Maggie Smith, NYT bestselling author of You Could Make This Place Beautiful).
Neko Case has long been revered as one of music’s most influential artists, whose authenticity, lyrical storytelling, and sly wit have endeared her to a legion of critics, musicians, and lifelong fans. In THE HARDER I FIGHT THE MORE I LOVE YOU, Case brings her trademark candor and precision to a memoir that traces her evolution from an invisible girl “raised by two dogs and a space heater” in rural Washington state to her improbable emergence as an internationally acclaimed talent.
In luminous, sharp-edged prose, Case shows listeners what it’s like to be left alone for hours and hours as a child, to take refuge in the woods around her home, and to channel the monotony and loneliness and joy that comes from music, camaraderie, and shared experience into art.
THE HARDER I FIGHT THE MORE I LOVE YOU is a rebellious meditation on identity and corruption, and a manifesto on how to make space for ourselves in this world, despite the obstacles we face.
©2025 Neko Case (P)2025 Grand Central PublishingListeners also enjoyed...
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Critic reviews
“Reader, I really want to hand this book to you personally and tell you, in one excited rush, how much it moved me. THE HARDER I FIGHT THE MORE I LOVE YOU is a hell of an origin story: heartbreaking and funny, brave and weird, hard to swallow and impossible to put down. Neko Case has been my favorite singer-songwriter for many years, hands down, and now she’s written one of my favorite memoirs.”—Maggie Smith, New York Times bestselling author of You Could Make This Place Beautiful
"This is a fierce, funny, moving memoir that will break your heart and patch it back up. Case's writing is as piercing and beautiful as her gorgeous singing, and will carry you away completely."—New York Times bestselling author Susan Orlean
"A vivid, exuberant, heartrending coming-of-age story that demonstrates the saving power of art. This book captured me the way Case's songs do: with their ache and beauty and promise that the only way through this life is to feel it all."—Melissa Febos, author of Girlhood, winner of the National Book Critics Circle Award in Criticism
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When Michael Lewis first met him, Sam Bankman-Fried was the world’s youngest billionaire and crypto’s Gatsby. CEOs, celebrities, and leaders of small countries all vied for his time and cash after he catapulted, practically overnight, onto the Forbes billionaire list. Who was this rumpled guy in cargo shorts and limp white socks, whose eyes twitched across Zoom meetings as he played video games on the side?
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really expected more rigor from Michael Lewis
- By Wowhello on 10-04-23
By: Michael Lewis
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The Madman's Hotel
- By: Niall Breslin
- Narrated by: Niall Breslin
- Length: 4 hrs and 4 mins
- Original Recording
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In the heart of the rolling green hills of Ireland a huge abandoned psychiatric asylum looms large and holds its secrets close, until one family fights to find the truth about their long lost great grandmother. Presented by Irish celebrity and mental health advocate Niall Breslin - this is the untold story of the quest to find patient Julia Leonard, alongside many others, who came to die in St Loman’s Hospital near Dublin. Why was Julia in St Loman’s? And what happened to her and other patients who found themselves within its walls?
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Heart felt Remembrance
- By RosaInGlousta on 11-05-24
By: Niall Breslin
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I Can't Make This Up
- Life Lessons
- By: Neil Strauss - contributor, Kevin Hart
- Narrated by: Kevin Hart
- Length: 11 hrs and 15 mins
- Unabridged
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Superstar comedian and Hollywood box-office star Kevin Hart turns his immense talent to the written word by writing some words. Some of those words include: the, a, for, above, and even even. Put them together and you have the funniest, most heartfelt, and most inspirational memoir on survival, success, and the importance of believing in yourself since Old Yeller.
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Best Audiobook I Ever Listened To
- By Sam Clear on 07-13-17
By: Neil Strauss - contributor, and others
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Genghis Khan and the Making of the Modern World
- By: Jack Weatherford
- Narrated by: Jonathan Davis, Jack Weatherford
- Length: 14 hrs and 20 mins
- Unabridged
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The Mongol army led by Genghis Khan subjugated more lands and people in 25 years than the Romans did in 400. In nearly every country the Mongols conquered, they brought an unprecedented rise in cultural communication, expanded trade, and a blossoming of civilization.
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Golden Horde/Platinum Listen
- By Cynthia on 12-11-13
By: Jack Weatherford
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The Demon Next Door
- By: Bryan Burrough
- Narrated by: Steve White
- Length: 2 hrs and 45 mins
- Unabridged
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Best-selling author Bryan Burrough recently made a shocking discovery: The small town of Temple, Texas, where he had grown up, had harbored a dark secret. One of his high school classmates, Danny Corwin, was a vicious serial killer. In this chilling tale, Burrough raises important questions of whether serial killers can be recognized before they kill or rehabilitated after they do. It is also a story of Texas politics and power that led the good citizens of the town of Temple to enable a demon who was their worst nightmare.
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Odd narration choice
- By Amanda Fredericks on 03-08-19
By: Bryan Burrough
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My Mom's Murder
- By: AYR Media
- Narrated by: Lauren Malloy
- Length: 6 hrs and 35 mins
- Original Recording
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When a mysterious stranger unveils a long-hidden truth, Lauren Malloy’s life is thrown into chaos. For years, Lauren believed her mother, Lori, died of natural causes, but the shocking reality is that her loving mother was brutally murdered when Lauren was just an infant. Now, 30 years later, Lauren is on a relentless quest for justice. Over the past four years, she’s embarked on an emotional journey filled with unexpected twists, recording hundreds of hours of interviews with law enforcement, family, friends, and even potential suspects.
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The raw interviews.
- By knapper on 11-12-24
By: AYR Media
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Elvis and Me
- By: Priscilla Beaulieu Presley
- Narrated by: Priscilla Beaulieu Presley
- Length: 7 hrs and 30 mins
- Unabridged
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The inspiration for the major motion picture Priscilla directed by Sofia Coppola, this New York Times best seller reveals the intimate story of Elvis Presley and Priscilla Presley, told by the woman who lived it.
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What a story!
- By Pen Name on 08-28-22
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Evil Has a Name
- The Untold Story of the Golden State Killer Investigation
- By: Paul Holes, Jim Clemente, Peter McDonnell
- Narrated by: Paul Holes, Jim Clemente
- Length: 6 hrs and 13 mins
- Original Recording
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For his victims, for their families and for the investigators tasked with finding him, the senselessness and brutality of the Golden State Killer's acts were matched only by the powerlessness they felt at failing to uncover his identity. Then, on April 24, 2018, authorities arrested 72-year-old Joseph James DeAngelo at his home in Citrus Heights, Calif., based on DNA evidence linked to the crimes. Amazingly, it seemed, evil finally had a name. Please note: This work contains descriptions of violent crime and sexual assault and may not be suitable for all listeners.
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Audible Raises The Bar On True Crime Genre
- By R. Squyres on 11-16-18
By: Paul Holes, and others
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Ghost
- My Thirty Years as an FBI Undercover Agent
- By: Michael R. McGowan, Ralph Pezzullo
- Narrated by: Mike Dawson
- Length: 8 hrs and 45 mins
- Unabridged
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Within FBI field operative circles, groups of people known as “Special” by their titles alone, Michael R. McGowan is an outlier. Over the course of his career, McGowan has worked more than 50 undercover cases. In this extraordinary and unprecedented book, McGowan will take listeners through some of his biggest cases, from international drug busts to the Russian and Italian mobs to biker gangs and contract killers to corrupt unions and SWAT work. Ghost is an unparalleled view into how the FBI, through the courage of its undercover Special Agents, nails the bad guys.
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Interesting story, but narration eh
- By Ahdumb on 10-06-18
By: Michael R. McGowan, and others
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The Autobiography of Malcolm X
- As Told to Alex Haley
- By: Malcolm X, Alex Haley
- Narrated by: Laurence Fishburne
- Length: 16 hrs and 52 mins
- Unabridged
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Experience a bold take on this classic autobiography as it’s performed by Oscar-nominated Laurence Fishburne. In this searing classic autobiography, originally published in 1965, Malcolm X, the Muslim leader, firebrand, and Black empowerment activist, tells the extraordinary story of his life and the growth of the Human Rights movement. His fascinating perspective on the lies and limitations of the American dream and the inherent racism in a society that denies its non-White citizens the opportunity to dream, gives extraordinary insight into the most urgent issues of our own time.
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it's Nearly perfect
- By Kerry on 09-16-20
By: Malcolm X, and others
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The History of Sketch Comedy
- A Journey Through the Art and Craft of Humor
- By: Keegan-Michael Key, Elle Key
- Narrated by: Keegan-Michael Key
- Length: 7 hrs and 27 mins
- Unabridged
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Authors Keegan-Michael Key and Elle Key build on the popularity of their 2022 Webby Award-winning podcast and delve deeper into the world of sketch, helped along with new essays created expressly for the book by comedy greats.
By: Keegan-Michael Key, and others
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A Devil in the Valley
- By: Paul Holes, Peter McDonnell
- Narrated by: Jim Clemente, Paul Holes
- Length: 4 hrs and 36 mins
- Original Recording
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In 1994, an aspiring young cold-case investigator in California’s East Bay, Paul Holes, puts aside trying to solve the Golden State Killer case as he waits for science to catch up. Paul returns to an old file cabinet at the back of the forensic lab to look for another cold case he can work—something with DNA. He finds one. The 1978 murder of a married mother who went for a morning jog in a nearby park. The original investigators believed that a serial killer named Phillip Hughes was responsible; they just couldn’t prove it.
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Excellent!!!
- By Nick on 08-05-21
By: Paul Holes, and others
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This book was so needed
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When Lee Metoyer is hired to be the new housekeeper, she has no idea that she’s about to become the anchor to a family in an abusive patriarch’s home, setting a mystery in motion that will take decades to uncover. At the age of seventy-two, Lee falls ill and on her deathbed asks Sandy to write her story. The only problem is, Sandy doesn’t know the story. Embarking on a quest to honor Lee’s final wishes, Sandy takes an emotional and thrilling journey, unveiling shocking truths not only about her beloved housekeeper but also her own upbringing.
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Fascinating
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What listeners say about The Harder I Fight the More I Love You
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- Andrea L.
- 02-27-25
Tremendous!
This book is absolutely tremendous, I loved it and the imagery in Neko Case’s songwriting transforms stunningly to the book. As a visual thinker myself, I was deeply moved. I appreciate Neko Case’s commitment to standing up for women, that made me feel safe and filled me with admiration and relief. I grew up in the same area as her, so many things resonated and Neko Case is beloved here.
Thank you for saying all of it.
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- corinne
- 01-30-25
The richest prose
I guess it’s not shocking that a songwriter should be able to so richly tell a story but her astounding memory bloomed forgotten visions of my own childhood. Magical thoughts swimming around a snow globe. Nemo Case knows how to unleash them.
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- Amazon Customer
- 02-06-25
Neko Case is a feminist icon!
Absolutely loved Neko’s writing and storytelling— you can feel the pain, the hunger, the dirty clubs, the struggling musician lifestyle in such a raw and visceral way. As a huge fan, I just wish she had talked more about her process through each album!
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- Holly Hearts
- 02-23-25
Thank you Neko
Neko Case merges raw honesty, poetic prose, and deep introspection to deliver a powerful narrative on childhood, loneliness, and found family.
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- Lost Outpost
- 03-20-25
Loved it! Powerful!
Listen all the way to the end!
Her honest voice throws down a clear message of endurance & hope, a force to embrace!
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- Laurel Waterson
- 02-12-25
A diamond of a mind rendered in full
A generous memoir that allowed me to reconnect my own childhood and youth. Neko Case’s accounting of modern American and music history is very relevant today. Themes and symbolism carried me down the forest path of this hero’s story.
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- Jennifer Phares
- 01-31-25
Memories of a dirty 70’s kid
Thank you for this gift down memory lane and your cool irreverent writing style. I thought I lost my kid memories but your memoir brought them all back. I’ll be giving this a second listen for sure.
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- L. Taylor
- 02-05-25
If you ever wondered ...
What is Neko Case about? here is your opportunity. I have been riveted
by her voice and music for quite some time. This was a great memior.
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- Candace D.
- 02-11-25
The pleasure of having read by the author
I recognize so many similarities to my upbringing - parents who were totally unable to form an attachment to a baby and both carrying a shitload of epigenetic trauma, extreme social isolation and loneliness, a trickster alcoholic mother, etc., etc.
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- bdbrinker
- 03-16-25
Nothing short of honest
Love how it’s written. Much like her songs. I’m about the same age as Neko Case and related to so much. So much. I’m glad she read the audio version.
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