
The Harder I Fight the More I Love You
A Memoir
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Narrated by:
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Neko Case
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By:
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Neko Case
About this listen
From a beloved Grammy-nominated musician, a "heartbreaking and funny" memoir of a poverty-stricken childhood, obsessive desires, and indispensable friendships that reflects on the way art and music and a deep connection to nature guided her journey towards stardom (Maggie Smith, NYT bestselling author of You Could Make This Place Beautiful).
Neko Case has long been revered as one of music’s most influential artists, whose authenticity, lyrical storytelling, and sly wit have endeared her to a legion of critics, musicians, and lifelong fans. In THE HARDER I FIGHT THE MORE I LOVE YOU, Case brings her trademark candor and precision to a memoir that traces her evolution from an invisible girl “raised by two dogs and a space heater” in rural Washington state to her improbable emergence as an internationally acclaimed talent.
In luminous, sharp-edged prose, Case shows listeners what it’s like to be left alone for hours and hours as a child, to take refuge in the woods around her home, and to channel the monotony and loneliness and joy that comes from music, camaraderie, and shared experience into art.
THE HARDER I FIGHT THE MORE I LOVE YOU is a rebellious meditation on identity and corruption, and a manifesto on how to make space for ourselves in this world, despite the obstacles we face.
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Critic reviews
“Reader, I really want to hand this book to you personally and tell you, in one excited rush, how much it moved me. THE HARDER I FIGHT THE MORE I LOVE YOU is a hell of an origin story: heartbreaking and funny, brave and weird, hard to swallow and impossible to put down. Neko Case has been my favorite singer-songwriter for many years, hands down, and now she’s written one of my favorite memoirs.”—Maggie Smith, New York Times bestselling author of You Could Make This Place Beautiful
"This is a fierce, funny, moving memoir that will break your heart and patch it back up. Case's writing is as piercing and beautiful as her gorgeous singing, and will carry you away completely."—New York Times bestselling author Susan Orlean
"A vivid, exuberant, heartrending coming-of-age story that demonstrates the saving power of art. This book captured me the way Case's songs do: with their ache and beauty and promise that the only way through this life is to feel it all."—Melissa Febos, author of Girlhood, winner of the National Book Critics Circle Award in Criticism
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Meh.
- By Julie Wright on 03-26-25
By: Ione Skye
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You'll Never Believe Me
- A Life of Lies, Second Tries, and Things I Should Only Tell My Therapist
- By: Kari Ferrell
- Narrated by: Kari Ferrell
- Length: 6 hrs and 25 mins
- Unabridged
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Before Anna Delvey, before the Tinder Swindler, there was Kari Ferrell. Adopted at a young age by a Mormon family in Utah, Kari struggled with questions of self-worth and identity as one of the few Asian Americans in her insulated community, leading her to run with the “bad crowd” in an effort to fit in. Soon, stealing from superstores turned into picking up men (and picking their pockets), and before she knew it, Kari had graduated from petty theft to Utah’s most wanted list. Though Kari was able to escape the Southwest, she couldn’t outrun her new moniker: the Hipster Grifter.
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Very interested and perfect the way she didn’t do too long in one area
- By Amazon Customer on 03-31-25
By: Kari Ferrell
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His Eye Is on the Sparrow
- By: David Pearman, Ani Pearman
- Narrated by: Eric A Grimes
- Length: 8 hrs and 4 mins
- Unabridged
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His Eye Is on the Sparrow recounts the remarkable journey of Juhn Joong Ki, from a polio-stricken Korean orphan to the resilient figure of faith, David Pearman. Despite abandonment and abuse in Korea and America, his story is a powerful testament to the human spirit's ability to overcome adversity through faith and forgiveness. David invites listeners to find echoes of their own stories within his words.
By: David Pearman, and others
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Dirtbag Queen
- By: Andy Corren
- Narrated by: Andy Corren
- Length: 10 hrs and 4 mins
- Unabridged
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“Because she was my mother, the death of zaftig good-time gal Renay Corren is newsworthy to me, and I treat it with the same respect and reverence she had for, well, nothing. A more disrespectful, trash talking woman was not to be found.” So began Andy Corren's unforgettable obituary for his mother, Renay Mandel Corren, in her hometown paper The Fayetteville Observer, a tribute that went on to touch the hearts of millions around the globe. In his brief telling of the life and legend that was Renay, Andy captured only a slice of his loving and fabulously unconventional mother.
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Oh, Mama!
- By Placeholder on 02-11-25
By: Andy Corren
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The Loves of My Life
- A Sex Memoir
- By: Edmund White
- Narrated by: Joel Froomkin
- Length: 6 hrs and 23 mins
- Unabridged
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Written with White’s signature honesty, irreverence, and wit, The Loves of My Life is the culmination of a legend's life and work, a delightful and moving tour of over seventy years of being unabashedly gay and in love with love in all its forms.
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Does not compare favorably to White's other books
- By Reader X on 04-03-25
By: Edmund White
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Fi
- A Memoir
- By: Alexandra Fuller
- Narrated by: Alexandra Fuller
- Length: 6 hrs and 24 mins
- Unabridged
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It’s the middle of the summer before her fiftieth birthday and Alexandra is just barely hanging on. Grieving her father and pining for her home country of Zimbabwe, chafing and straining against the stresses and strictures of midlife as a mother and ex-wife, and piecing her way through a disastrous relationship with a younger woman that lurches and buckles, but never quite breaks. And then—suddenly and incomprehensibly—her son Fi, at 21 years old, dies in his sleep. What happens next is what Alexandra details in this book.
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Lifting the fog
- By Nina J. on 04-20-24
By: Alexandra Fuller
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Never Understood
- The Jesus and Mary Chain
- By: William Reid, Jim Reid
- Narrated by: William Reid, Jim Reid
- Length: 9 hrs
- Unabridged
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William and Jim Reid, brothers and founding members of The Jesus and Mary Chain—a band that bridged the gap between the punk explosion and the emergence of grunge and Britpop—chronicle the chaos, confusion, and stories behind their music.
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A huge amount of complaining throughout the book. I love JAMC but, sheesh, there is a fair amount of "woe is me"
- By R. on 11-19-24
By: William Reid, and others
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Girl in a Band
- A Memoir
- By: Kim Gordon
- Narrated by: Kim Gordon
- Length: 7 hrs and 14 mins
- Unabridged
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Kim Gordon, founding member of Sonic Youth, fashion icon, and role model for a generation of women, now tells her story - a memoir of life as an artist, of music, marriage, motherhood, independence, and as one of the first women of rock and roll, written with the lyricism and haunting beauty of Patti Smith's Just Kids.
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Maskenfreiheit: The Freedom Conferred by Masks
- By Darwin8u on 10-12-15
By: Kim Gordon
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Pure Innocent Fun
- Essays
- By: Ira Madison III
- Narrated by: Ira Madison III
- Length: 6 hrs and 51 mins
- Unabridged
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In Pure Innocent Fun, Madison explores the key cultural moments that inspired his career as a critic and guided his coming of age as a Black gay man in Milwaukee. In this hilarious, full-throttle trip through the ’90s and 2000s, he recounts learning about sex from Buffy the Vampire Slayer; facing the most heartbreaking election of his youth (not George W. Bush’s win, but Jennifer Hudson losing American Idol); and how never getting his driver’s license in high school made him just like Cher Horowitz in Clueless: “a virgin who can’t drive.”
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Too Much Fun
- By Richard Lopez on 04-25-25
By: Ira Madison III
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Dare I Say It
- Everything I Wish I'd Known About Menopause
- By: Naomi Watts, Mary Claire Haver MD
- Narrated by: Naomi Watts, Allyson Ryan
- Length: 6 hrs and 50 mins
- Unabridged
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At thirty-six, Naomi Watts had just completed filming King Kong and was trying to start a family when she was told that she was on the brink of menopause. It is estimated that seventy-five million women in the United States are currently dealing with menopause symptoms (dry itchy skin, raging hormones, night sweats), and yet the very word “menopause” continues to be associated with stigma and confusion. With so little information, many women feel unprepared, ashamed, and deeply alone when the time comes. This is the book Naomi Watts wishes she had when she first started experiencing symptoms.
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Very informative!
- By Shelindria on 04-21-25
By: Naomi Watts, and others
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From These Roots
- My Fight with Harvard to Reclaim My Legacy
- By: Tamara Lanier
- Narrated by: Shonrael Lanier
- Length: 9 hrs and 58 mins
- Unabridged
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Tamara Lanier grew up listening to her mother’s stories about her ancestors. As Black Americans descended from enslaved people brought to America, they knew all too well how fragile the tapestry of a lineage could be. As her mother’s health declined, she pushed her daughter to dig into those stories. "Tell them about Papa Renty," she would say. It was her mother’s last wish. Thus begins one woman’s remarkable commitment to document that story.
By: Tamara Lanier
What listeners say about The Harder I Fight the More I Love You
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- Andrea L.
- 02-27-25
Tremendous!
This book is absolutely tremendous, I loved it and the imagery in Neko Case’s songwriting transforms stunningly to the book. As a visual thinker myself, I was deeply moved. I appreciate Neko Case’s commitment to standing up for women, that made me feel safe and filled me with admiration and relief. I grew up in the same area as her, so many things resonated and Neko Case is beloved here.
Thank you for saying all of it.
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- Holly Hearts
- 02-23-25
Thank you Neko
Neko Case merges raw honesty, poetic prose, and deep introspection to deliver a powerful narrative on childhood, loneliness, and found family.
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- Lost Outpost
- 03-20-25
Loved it! Powerful!
Listen all the way to the end!
Her honest voice throws down a clear message of endurance & hope, a force to embrace!
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- corinne
- 01-30-25
The richest prose
I guess it’s not shocking that a songwriter should be able to so richly tell a story but her astounding memory bloomed forgotten visions of my own childhood. Magical thoughts swimming around a snow globe. Nemo Case knows how to unleash them.
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- Amazon Customer
- 02-06-25
Neko Case is a feminist icon!
Absolutely loved Neko’s writing and storytelling— you can feel the pain, the hunger, the dirty clubs, the struggling musician lifestyle in such a raw and visceral way. As a huge fan, I just wish she had talked more about her process through each album!
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- Jennifer Phares
- 01-31-25
Memories of a dirty 70’s kid
Thank you for this gift down memory lane and your cool irreverent writing style. I thought I lost my kid memories but your memoir brought them all back. I’ll be giving this a second listen for sure.
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- L. Taylor
- 02-05-25
If you ever wondered ...
What is Neko Case about? here is your opportunity. I have been riveted
by her voice and music for quite some time. This was a great memior.
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- Candace D.
- 02-11-25
The pleasure of having read by the author
I recognize so many similarities to my upbringing - parents who were totally unable to form an attachment to a baby and both carrying a shitload of epigenetic trauma, extreme social isolation and loneliness, a trickster alcoholic mother, etc., etc.
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- bdbrinker
- 03-16-25
Nothing short of honest
Love how it’s written. Much like her songs. I’m about the same age as Neko Case and related to so much. So much. I’m glad she read the audio version.
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- jeanne
- 02-21-25
Horse Sister riding through sound waves
I’m so happy she created a family of friends, fellow travelers in music, and the natural world. That her horses are her teachers and brothers is beautiful. My sons and I share her love of cats and their singular medicine, they’re also funny as all get out. I can hear the stories of her life in the shimmering heatwaves of her voice and guitar and stories. That she sees the arc of history through women and horses is part of what makes her like no other. I had to go take a walk in the woods after listening to it.
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