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The Harder I Fight the More I Love You
A Memoir
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Narrated by:
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Neko Case
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By:
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Neko Case
About this listen
From a beloved Grammy-nominated musician, a "heartbreaking and funny" memoir of a poverty-stricken childhood, obsessive desires, and indispensable friendships that reflects on the way art and music and a deep connection to nature guided her journey towards stardom (Maggie Smith, NYT bestselling author of You Could Make This Place Beautiful).
Neko Case has long been revered as one of music’s most influential artists, whose authenticity, lyrical storytelling, and sly wit have endeared her to a legion of critics, musicians, and lifelong fans. In THE HARDER I FIGHT THE MORE I LOVE YOU, Case brings her trademark candor and precision to a memoir that traces her evolution from an invisible girl “raised by two dogs and a space heater” in rural Washington state to her improbable emergence as an internationally acclaimed talent.
In luminous, sharp-edged prose, Case shows listeners what it’s like to be left alone for hours and hours as a child, to take refuge in the woods around her home, and to channel the monotony and loneliness and joy that comes from music, camaraderie, and shared experience into art.
THE HARDER I FIGHT THE MORE I LOVE YOU is a rebellious meditation on identity and corruption, and a manifesto on how to make space for ourselves in this world, despite the obstacles we face.
©2025 Neko Case (P)2025 Grand Central PublishingListeners also enjoyed...
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Critic reviews
“Reader, I really want to hand this book to you personally and tell you, in one excited rush, how much it moved me. THE HARDER I FIGHT THE MORE I LOVE YOU is a hell of an origin story: heartbreaking and funny, brave and weird, hard to swallow and impossible to put down. Neko Case has been my favorite singer-songwriter for many years, hands down, and now she’s written one of my favorite memoirs.”—Maggie Smith, New York Times bestselling author of You Could Make This Place Beautiful
"This is a fierce, funny, moving memoir that will break your heart and patch it back up. Case's writing is as piercing and beautiful as her gorgeous singing, and will carry you away completely."—New York Times bestselling author Susan Orlean
"A vivid, exuberant, heartrending coming-of-age story that demonstrates the saving power of art. This book captured me the way Case's songs do: with their ache and beauty and promise that the only way through this life is to feel it all."—Melissa Febos, author of Girlhood, winner of the National Book Critics Circle Award in Criticism
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One day, Lori Gottlieb is a therapist who helps patients in her Los Angeles practice. The next, a crisis causes her world to come crashing down. Enter Wendell, the quirky but seasoned therapist in whose office she suddenly lands. With his balding head, cardigan, and khakis, he seems to have come straight from Therapist Central Casting. Yet he will turn out to be anything but.
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It was like a hallmark movie being waterboarded into my ears for 15 hours
- By Amazon Customer on 10-01-19
By: Lori Gottlieb
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Genghis Khan and the Making of the Modern World
- By: Jack Weatherford
- Narrated by: Jonathan Davis, Jack Weatherford
- Length: 14 hrs and 20 mins
- Unabridged
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The Mongol army led by Genghis Khan subjugated more lands and people in 25 years than the Romans did in 400. In nearly every country the Mongols conquered, they brought an unprecedented rise in cultural communication, expanded trade, and a blossoming of civilization.
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Golden Horde/Platinum Listen
- By Cynthia on 12-11-13
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The Autobiography of Malcolm X
- As Told to Alex Haley
- By: Malcolm X, Alex Haley
- Narrated by: Laurence Fishburne
- Length: 16 hrs and 52 mins
- Unabridged
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Experience a bold take on this classic autobiography as it’s performed by Oscar-nominated Laurence Fishburne. In this searing classic autobiography, originally published in 1965, Malcolm X, the Muslim leader, firebrand, and Black empowerment activist, tells the extraordinary story of his life and the growth of the Human Rights movement. His fascinating perspective on the lies and limitations of the American dream and the inherent racism in a society that denies its non-White citizens the opportunity to dream, gives extraordinary insight into the most urgent issues of our own time.
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it's Nearly perfect
- By Kerry on 09-16-20
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The Book of Murder
- A Prosecutor's Journey Through Love and Death
- By: Matt Murphy
- Narrated by: Matt Murphy
- Length: 9 hrs and 59 mins
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Examining murder from an insider’s perspective, Matt Murphy—a former senior deputy district attorney and current ABC News legal analyst—discusses cases from his career, how they strained his personal life, and how he found peace seeking justice for victims and their families. Part taxonomy of murder, part prosecutor’s handbook, and part personal memoir, The Book of Murder goes through a dozen cases and his recollections of his 26 years in the Orange County DA’s office (17 in the Homicide Unit).
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Great book
- By Last Lemming on 10-04-24
By: Matt Murphy
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Into the Madness
- A Killer’s Game, a Woman’s Obsession, a Dark Conspiracy
- By: Trevor Aaronson
- Narrated by: Trevor Aaronson
- Length: 4 hrs and 31 mins
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On July 4, 2022, a shooter climbed onto a rooftop in Highland Park, Illinois, and opened fire on a Fourth of July parade below, killing seven people and wounding dozens more. Prosecutors charged Robert “Bobby” Crimo III with the mass shooting. But this attack was part of something even more insidious. Bobby had created an elaborate game—complete with cryptic videos, a book of numbers, and an eerie online presence—designed to seed a conspiracy theory about the massacre.
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Left with a depressing reality
- By Susan Howes on 02-22-25
By: Trevor Aaronson
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My Mom's Murder
- By: AYR Media
- Narrated by: Lauren Malloy
- Length: 6 hrs and 35 mins
- Original Recording
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When a mysterious stranger unveils a long-hidden truth, Lauren Malloy’s life is thrown into chaos. For years, Lauren believed her mother, Lori, died of natural causes, but the shocking reality is that her loving mother was brutally murdered when Lauren was just an infant. Now, 30 years later, Lauren is on a relentless quest for justice. Over the past four years, she’s embarked on an emotional journey filled with unexpected twists, recording hundreds of hours of interviews with law enforcement, family, friends, and even potential suspects.
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Gripping
- By Emily Palmer on 10-12-24
By: AYR Media
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Elvis and Me
- By: Priscilla Beaulieu Presley
- Narrated by: Priscilla Beaulieu Presley
- Length: 7 hrs and 30 mins
- Unabridged
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The inspiration for the major motion picture Priscilla directed by Sofia Coppola, this New York Times best seller reveals the intimate story of Elvis Presley and Priscilla Presley, told by the woman who lived it.
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What a story!
- By Pen Name on 08-28-22
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The Wonder of Stevie
- By: Wesley Morris
- Narrated by: Wesley Morris, Michelle Obama, Barack Obama, and others
- Length: 6 hrs and 10 mins
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The year 1972 saw the beginning of a five-year span in which Stevie Wonder released five groundbreaking, critically acclaimed albums, garnering him more than half a dozen Grammys and more than 10 million albums sold, securing his place as one of the most important American musicians and songwriters in history. For the first time, uncover the untold story of an extraordinary artistic journey that shaped the greatest creative era in popular music history.
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Good but not great
- By Anonymous User on 09-14-24
By: Wesley Morris
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The Madman's Hotel
- By: Niall Breslin
- Narrated by: Niall Breslin
- Length: 4 hrs and 4 mins
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In the heart of the rolling green hills of Ireland a huge abandoned psychiatric asylum looms large and holds its secrets close, until one family fights to find the truth about their long lost great grandmother. Presented by Irish celebrity and mental health advocate Niall Breslin - this is the untold story of the quest to find patient Julia Leonard, alongside many others, who came to die in St Loman’s Hospital near Dublin. Why was Julia in St Loman’s? And what happened to her and other patients who found themselves within its walls?
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Heart felt Remembrance
- By RosaInGlousta on 11-05-24
By: Niall Breslin
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James Baldwin: The Man and His Work
- By: Rafael Walker, The Great Courses
- Narrated by: Rafael Walker
- Length: 2 hrs and 56 mins
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Artist. Public intellectual. Political activist. James Baldwin was all of these and more. Raised in the slums of Depression-era Harlem in New York City, Baldwin would become an author and activist of international renown—one whose legacy has continued long beyond his death in 1987. Who was James Baldwin? How did he become the master of multiple literary genres and a champion for some of the era’s most notable political and social causes? And how is his influence still being felt today?
By: Rafael Walker, and others
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Ali in Me
- By: Mercury Studios, Treefort Media
- Narrated by: Lonnie Ali, John Ramsey
- Length: 3 hrs and 31 mins
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Muhammad Ali, never afraid to express himself loudly and boldly, stays true to form in Ali in Me, an eight-part audio series that explores his life and legacy, guided by his own words through never-before-heard audio recordings. Hosted by Muhammad’s widow, Lonnie Ali, and his close friend, award-winning broadcaster John Ramsey, Ali in Me goes beyond the boxing ring to delve deeply into the extraordinary life and lasting contributions The Champ made to individuals around the world.
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He went hard on everything, especially love
- By 🔥 Phx17 🔥 on 01-31-25
By: Mercury Studios, and others
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Helter Skelter
- The True Story of the Manson Murders
- By: Vincent Bugliosi, Curt Gentry
- Narrated by: Scott Brick
- Length: 26 hrs and 29 mins
- Unabridged
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Prosecuting attorney in the Manson trial Vincent Bugliosi held a unique insider's position in one of the most baffling and horrifying cases of the 20th century: the cold-blooded Tate-LaBianca murders carried out by Charles Manson and four of his followers. What motivated Manson in his seemingly mindless selection of victims, and what was his hold over the young women who obeyed his orders? Now available for the first time in unabridged audio, the gripping story of this famous and haunting crime is brought to life by acclaimed narrator Scott Brick.
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Everything I remembered about the case was wrong..
- By karen on 06-22-12
By: Vincent Bugliosi, and others
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The Demon Next Door
- By: Bryan Burrough
- Narrated by: Steve White
- Length: 2 hrs and 45 mins
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Best-selling author Bryan Burrough recently made a shocking discovery: The small town of Temple, Texas, where he had grown up, had harbored a dark secret. One of his high school classmates, Danny Corwin, was a vicious serial killer. In this chilling tale, Burrough raises important questions of whether serial killers can be recognized before they kill or rehabilitated after they do. It is also a story of Texas politics and power that led the good citizens of the town of Temple to enable a demon who was their worst nightmare.
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Odd narration choice
- By Amanda Fredericks on 03-08-19
By: Bryan Burrough
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Evil Has a Name
- The Untold Story of the Golden State Killer Investigation
- By: Paul Holes, Jim Clemente, Peter McDonnell
- Narrated by: Paul Holes, Jim Clemente
- Length: 6 hrs and 13 mins
- Original Recording
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For his victims, for their families and for the investigators tasked with finding him, the senselessness and brutality of the Golden State Killer's acts were matched only by the powerlessness they felt at failing to uncover his identity. Then, on April 24, 2018, authorities arrested 72-year-old Joseph James DeAngelo at his home in Citrus Heights, Calif., based on DNA evidence linked to the crimes. Amazingly, it seemed, evil finally had a name. Please note: This work contains descriptions of violent crime and sexual assault and may not be suitable for all listeners.
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Audible Raises The Bar On True Crime Genre
- By R. Squyres on 11-16-18
By: Paul Holes, and others
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Published in the US for the first time, Fearless and Free is the memoir of the fabulous, rule-breaking, one-of-a-kind Josephine Baker, the iconic dancer, singer, spy, and Civil Rights activist. After stealing the spotlight as a teenaged Broadway performer during the height of the Harlem Renaissance, Josephine then took Paris by storm, dazzling audiences across the Roaring Twenties. In her famous banana skirt, she enraptured royalty and countless fans—Ernest Hemingway and Pablo Picasso among them.
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A incongruous mess
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What listeners say about The Harder I Fight the More I Love You
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- TXHillCo
- 01-31-25
Wonderful reading by the Author.
I love Neko’s telling of her story. It’s not always easy to tell her truth.
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- Leana Stormont
- 02-04-25
The More I Love Her
Case is authentic, humble, and fierce as a momma bear in her memoir. Her humanity is on full display without pretense and she lights the reader’s way with the same wonder that lights the stars.
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- corinne
- 01-30-25
The richest prose
I guess it’s not shocking that a songwriter should be able to so richly tell a story but her astounding memory bloomed forgotten visions of my own childhood. Magical thoughts swimming around a snow globe. Nemo Case knows how to unleash them.
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- Amazon Customer
- 02-06-25
Neko Case is a feminist icon!
Absolutely loved Neko’s writing and storytelling— you can feel the pain, the hunger, the dirty clubs, the struggling musician lifestyle in such a raw and visceral way. As a huge fan, I just wish she had talked more about her process through each album!
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- Jennifer Phares
- 01-31-25
Memories of a dirty 70’s kid
Thank you for this gift down memory lane and your cool irreverent writing style. I thought I lost my kid memories but your memoir brought them all back. I’ll be giving this a second listen for sure.
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- L. Taylor
- 02-05-25
If you ever wondered ...
What is Neko Case about? here is your opportunity. I have been riveted
by her voice and music for quite some time. This was a great memior.
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- Candace D.
- 02-11-25
The pleasure of having read by the author
I recognize so many similarities to my upbringing - parents who were totally unable to form an attachment to a baby and both carrying a shitload of epigenetic trauma, extreme social isolation and loneliness, a trickster alcoholic mother, etc., etc.
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- Laurel Waterson
- 02-12-25
A diamond of a mind rendered in full
A generous memoir that allowed me to reconnect my own childhood and youth. Neko Case’s accounting of modern American and music history is very relevant today. Themes and symbolism carried me down the forest path of this hero’s story.
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- Kate
- 02-09-25
Vivid, heartfelt storytelling
Wonderful memoir that takes us through an atmospheric, Pacific Northwest, chasing the fault lines of a childhood fractured by traumatized parents who lie and leave. We walk with an incredible artist, through the life experiences that could have destroyed her, but that she weathered enough to be able to blossom into a force of creativity who loves horses, songwriting and connection. Readers unfamiliar with the artist may wonder if they’ll be captivated either way. I think the answer is yes. Excellent audiobook.
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- amy rauch
- 01-31-25
Raw emotion for one of our modern day poets!
I am a fan of Neko Case, full disclosure, but I don’t think I ever really was able to capture the true beauty of her words. This book will make you laugh and cry and for me, proud to be one of the tribe.
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