Preview
  • How to Be a Vigilante: A Diary

  • By: Luke Smitherd
  • Narrated by: Luke Smitherd
  • Length: 7 hrs and 10 mins
  • 4.5 out of 5 stars (111 ratings)

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How to Be a Vigilante: A Diary

By: Luke Smitherd
Narrated by: Luke Smitherd
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Publisher's summary

From the author of the international best-seller The Stone Man, shortlisted for Audible UK's Book of the Year Award 2015.

In the late 1990s, a laptop was found in a service station just outside of Manchester. It contained a digital journal entitled 'TO THE FINDER: OPEN NOW TO CHANGE YOUR LIFE!' Now, for the first time, that infamous diary is being published in its entirety.

It's 1998. The Internet age is still in its infancy. Google has just been founded. Eighteen-year-old supermarket shelf-stacker Nigel Carmelite has decided that he's going to become a vigilante.

There are a few problems: how is he going to even find crime to fight on the streets of Derbyshire? How will he create a superhero costume - and an arsenal of crime-fighting weaponry - on a shoestring budget? And will his history of blackouts and crippling social inadequacy affect his chances? This is Nigel's account of his journey; part diary, part deluded self-help manual, tragically comic and slowly descending into what is arguably Luke Smitherd's darkest and most violent novel.

What do you believe in? And more importantly, should you?

©2016 Luke Smitherd (P)2016 Luke Smitherd
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What listeners say about How to Be a Vigilante: A Diary

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  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars
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    4 out of 5 stars

Another excellent book from Luke

What made the experience of listening to How to Be a Vigilante: A Diary the most enjoyable?

Luke's books are always enjoyable, in his unique dark sort of a way. This is a strangely positive innocent book to start with, but all the time there is a discomfort, and a knowing that things are not quite right. And by the end you know just how wrong they are.

Who was your favorite character and why?

The central character, Nigel. He's a very complicated person, but doesn't realise it. Ever the optimist too.

Have you listened to any of Luke Smitherd’s other performances before? How does this one compare?

I have listened to a number of Luke's other books, all of them are great. This one is a bit different, less sci-fi, but a great listen anyway. Personally I thought this one started a little slower, but I was totally hooked by the end.

If you were to make a film of this book, what would the tag line be?

"Keep your motivation"

Any additional comments?

Luke is a fantastic author, and this, while not his best in my opinion, is still well worth a purchase. Thoroughly enjoyed it.

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1 person found this helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

Brilliant!

Everyone loves a vigilante especially when they are self taught ! Not only is the plot fantastic and Luke captures your attention from the first page, but his voice is the narrator and takes this from a great audiobook to an experience! Highly recommend downloading this and his other works. I promise you won't be disappointed! Captivating, Enthralling, Fast paced, and just downright excellent!

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1 person found this helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

Just fantastic!

What did you love best about How to Be a Vigilante: A Diary?

The narration.

Have you listened to any of Luke Smitherd’s other performances before? How does this one compare?

This would be the first!

Any additional comments?

I'm usually wary of authors who read their own books, but this guy was fantastic!

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3 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

Fantastic story!

Absolutely adored this story. So many laugh out loud moments, it makes you want to share them with someone. At times absolutely hilarious and others so heart wrenching, this was such an engaging and enjoyable story. Can't recommend it highly enough, you won't be disappointed.

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3 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

Luke Smitherd is wonderfully unpredictable

I've read all of LS's books, and (at the risk of sounding like a book blurb) he's one of the most creative, fresh voices in recent fiction....or even distant fiction. I got this book without reading anything but the title so had no expectations what it would be like. I think this is a great way to approach Smitherd's books, since they are so wildly different & different from each other. If you have no preconceived notions, you're guaranteed to be surprised. Or even if you do.

The main character in this book is one of the more problematic characters I've run across in a long time; the guy's basically a socially inept, clueless nutjob with delusions of grandeur, but among laughing (or groaning) at his cluelessness & wincing at his insane ideas, there were times when I felt genuine sympathy for him. He often would then proceed to do something so self-rationalizingly wacko that I'd want to reach into the book & strangle him, but I would never say he's a cardboard character.

I have no serious and few minor gripes with Smitherd's writing; the pace of the book was pretty even, with very few only mildly draggy parts. He is wickedly funny at times. His dialogue is excellent --a very, very rare thing. The only nitpicks are that he seems to use the term "floor" to describe the outdoor substrate sometimes, whether road surface or dirt, which occasionally can be confusing, but maybe that's due to he & I being from different sides of The Pond. He did commit one of my own personal bugbears in this book, which probably won't bother most (normal) folks, but he did actually use that dreadful cliche about pain being almost an old friend. After decades of chronic pain I guarantee that is only said by people who haven't experienced it. Unless they're true, hardcore, long-term masochists, I guess.

Smitherd also does a great job of reading his books (tho it took me a while to stop trying to figure out where he'd messed up & blasted off with extremely hilarious profanity after listening to an 'outtakes reel' on his website.* But the recording was seamless). His pacing & expression is excellent, his voices for characters are recognizable & believable, & his accent is lovely to my ears, as is his voice. He mentions in the afterward of this book that he's got a contract on his next book for pro publishing, which probably means he won't read it; I have very mixed feelings. I'm extremely happy for this terrific emerging writer that he's finally getting attention from pro houses, but I really do like his self-narration.

I continue to look forward to more books by him & really hope he finally gets the major publishing contract he deserves. There are SO many "best-selling" writers out there churning out barely literate, formulaic crap that it's a travesty that someone as interesting & good has had to scramble with self-publishing. Tho I suppose that the publishing houses would have a problem with Smitherd partly because he is so different & almost uncategorizable; they like to slot books & authors into simple, 1- or at most 2-word slots, & he's one of the least slottable writers I've ever run across.


*if you're offended by naughty words, do NOT check this out. If you're not, it's pretty hysterically funny. But then folks who want strictly G-rated language probably don't last long with his books anyway.

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1 person found this helpful

  • Overall
    4 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars
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    4 out of 5 stars

So You Wanna Be a Hero? More to it than you think...

An enjoyable tweeking of the super hero tale... Best laid plans and that are on display w/ some humorous and sobering realism... Unforseen events, unanticipated consequences, and pitfall perils abound... My inner nerd can relate to the socially awkward protagonist, and it's not hard to see things from Nigel's perspective... I like the diary form, and it moved nicely... Narration is superb... Some quick reading mind candy...

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2 people found this helpful

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    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

Great story

This is a great yet brutal story. Can't wait to read more. Check it out.

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  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

This book gave me nightmares.

Holy cow. This book was a visceral and tough listen. Parts of it were so painful I found myself wincing as I drove home. I really enjoyed the narrators work. And it was the kind of story that was a fabulous and bloody train wreck. When you can't stop listening to. Encore!

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1 person found this helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

My favorite Luke Smitherd novel

The first Luke Smitherd novel I stumbled across was Kill Someone, and it was so great that I immediately sought out every other novel and short story he’s written and listened to or read them. This is by far my favorite, I’ve listened to it three or four times now, and I enjoy it every time as much as I did the first time. It’s funny, heartwarming, heartbreaking, shocking, and disturbing. One of my favorite books of all time. Thank you, Luke!

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  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

Interesting and scary

This is a pschological 1st person thriller set in 1998. Pretty brutal but well written. The reader was good.

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