Hung Hounds
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Narrated by:
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Blain Kilgore
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By:
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Donald Armfield
About this listen
When Earth is attacked by the hung hounds, ravenous trans-dimensional mutts with huge penises, it’s left to coolheaded Humphrey (who has no idea what’s going on), the super-sexy and feisty Dawn (who does), a retired porno actor, and a monkey in a wedding dress to save the planet.
Only thing is...
Glinda, the mermaid queen who has the key to unlock the mystery isn’t letting go of it, unless...
©12/26/2014 Donald Armfield (P)2018 Donald ArmfieldListeners also enjoyed...
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Enter the Druidverse® and discover a world of magic, mythology, and urban fantasy! This set contains three short story collections and three novellas: Blood Scent (a prequel novella), Druid Blood (a prequel novella), Blood Circus (a short story collection), Blood Ties (a short story collection), Blood Bound (a short story collection), and Colin McCool Saves Christmas (a Christmas novella). The novellas primarily focus on everyone’s favorite down-on-his-luck druid, Colin McCool, while many of the short stories feature supporting characters.
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This was a hard listen
- By Daniels Family on 06-21-24
By: M.D. Massey
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The Unnoticeables: A Novel
- The Vicious Circuit, Book 1
- By: Robert Brockway
- Narrated by: Nick Podehl, Emily Foster, Scott Merriman
- Length: 7 hrs and 49 mins
- Unabridged
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There are angels, and they are not beneficent or loving. But they do watch over us. They watch our lives unfold, analyzing us for repeating patterns and redundancies. When they find them, the angels simplify those patterns and remove the redundancies, and the problem that is "you" gets solved.
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Left wanting
- By Michelle L. Baron on 08-08-15
By: Robert Brockway
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Subterranean
- By: James Rollins
- Narrated by: John Meagher
- Length: 12 hrs
- Unabridged
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Travel to the bottom of the earth...to a place you never dreamed existed. Beneath the ice...a hand-picked team of specialists makes its way toward the center of the world. They are not the first to venture into this magnificient subterranean labyrinth. Those they follow did not return....
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Great story, funny Ausrtalian accent
- By David on 03-18-10
By: James Rollins
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Deadlocked 1
- By: A.R. Wise
- Narrated by: Brian Sutherland
- Length: 2 hrs and 11 mins
- Unabridged
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David was caught in the middle of the city when the zombie outbreak started. His wife and daughters were at home, stranded on the roof as zombies waited below. He would have to fight through hordes of undead, merciless other survivors, and a series of death defying stunts to get home. However, even if he makes it there, how can he be sure they're safe? Deadlocked puts you into David's head as he struggles to get home. Then a final confrontation occurs that could guarantee his family's survival, but at what cost?
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Looks like a great series to follow
- By Tilo on 07-06-14
By: A.R. Wise
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The Pilo Family Circus
- By: Will Elliott
- Narrated by: Mark Stephens
- Length: 11 hrs and 4 mins
- Unabridged
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"You have two days to pass your audition. You better pass it, feller. You’re joining the circus. Ain’t that the best news you ever got?" Delivered by a trio of psychotic clowns, this ultimatum plunges Jamie into the horrific alternate universe that is the centuries-old Pilo Family Circus, a borderline world between Hell and Earth from which humankind’s greatest tragedies have been perpetrated. Yet in this place - peopled by the gruesome, grotesque, and monstrous - where violence and savagery are the norm, Jamie finds that his worst enemy is himself.
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Entertaining but unremarkable bit of the lmacabre
- By David on 05-31-14
By: Will Elliott
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The Door in the Dragon's Throat
- The Cooper Kids Adventure Series, Book 1
- By: Frank E. Peretti
- Narrated by: Frank E. Peretti
- Length: 3 hrs and 2 mins
- Unabridged
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When teenagers Jay and Lila Cooper and their archaeologist father travel to Nepur, an uninviting land of deserts and danger, they must search to uncover the truth behind an ancient legend. Locals claim that inside a dark cavern called the Dragon's Throat is a forbidden Door that brings certain death to anyone who tries to open it. Armed with the knowledge that God is more powerful than any legend or curse, Jay and Lila plunge down into the Dragon's Throat, determined to find out what awaits them on the other side of the Door.
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Fun read with the family!
- By Mark Andrews on 05-11-17
By: Frank E. Peretti
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John Dies at the End
- By: David Wong
- Narrated by: Stephen R. Thorne
- Length: 14 hrs and 17 mins
- Unabridged
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STOP. You should not have touched this flyer with your bare hands. NO, don't put it down. It's too late. They're watching you. My name is David Wong. My best friend is John. Those names are fake. You might want to change yours. You may not want to know about the things you'll read on these pages, about the sauce, about Korrok, about the invasion, and the future. But it's too late. You touched the book. You're in the game. You're under the eye. The only defense is knowledge. You need to read this book, to the end. Even the part with the bratwurst. Why?
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Vulgar Funny. 4.95 Sale Win.
- By C Yohe on 11-19-12
By: David Wong
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Primordia
- In Search of the Lost World
- By: Greig Beck
- Narrated by: Sean Mangan
- Length: 11 hrs and 58 mins
- Unabridged
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A journey into the deepest, darkest jungles of the Venezuelan Amazon...and a primeval place and time that mankind was never meant to exist in. Ben Cartwright, former soldier, home to mourn the loss of his father, stumbles upon cryptic letters from the past between author Arthur Conan Doyle and his great-great-grandfather who vanished while exploring the Amazon jungle in 1908. Amazingly, these letters lead Ben to believe that his ancestor’s expedition was the basis for Doyle’s fantastical tale of a lost world inhabited by long-extinct creatures.
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Return to the Lost World
- By Richard S. Swol on 07-14-18
By: Greig Beck
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Smoke Eaters
- By: Sean Grigsby
- Narrated by: T. Ryder Smith
- Length: 9 hrs and 3 mins
- Unabridged
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When dragons rise from the earth, firefighters are humanity's last line of defense, in this wild near-future fantasy. Firefighter Cole Brannigan is on the verge of retirement after 30 years on the job, and a decade fighting dragons. But during his final fire call, he discovers he's immune to dragon smoke. It's such a rare power that he's immediately conscripted into the elite dragon-fighting force known as the Smoke Eaters. Retirement cancelled, Brannigan is re-assigned as a lowly rookie.
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Highly Enjoyable!
- By Logan on 04-07-18
By: Sean Grigsby
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Apocalypse Now Now
- By: Charlie Human
- Narrated by: David Atlas, Fiona Hardingham
- Length: 10 hrs and 38 mins
- Unabridged
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Baxter Zevcenko's life is pretty sweet. He's making a name for himself as the kingpin of his smut-peddling high school syndicate, the other gangs are staying out of his business, and he's dating the girl of his dreams, Esme. But when Esme gets kidnapped, things start to get seriously weird, and the only man drunk enough to help is a bearded, booze-soaked, supernatural bounty hunter who goes by the name of Jackson "Jackie" Ronin.
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WTF
- By Adam on 11-14-17
By: Charlie Human
What listeners say about Hung Hounds
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- LITRPG Audiobook Reviews
- 05-28-18
Harried Hound's Bite bigger than you'd expect
The premise of this story is pretty simple, someone has opened a dimensional rift that allows giant canines who are endowed with "members" that make them look like elephantine porno stars on steroids. The yrun around humping everything they can, and biting off the faces of those they can't (actually, I think they still bite your face off after they have their way with you. Ther hero of the story hooks up with various weirdos along the way, in an attempt to put things back to the way they were before the dogs start the humpocalypse.
The book is filled with characters like warty midgets, a gay transvestite monkey, a pair of highly aroused twins, and a fella who might just be partially responsible for the whole mess. The book certainly veers south of the twilight zone and bounces into strange territories. The biggest issue I have is that there are characters, but no real characterization. You have an ex-porn star but not his motivation for his going along for the ride. He basically just meets the protagonist, and is suddenly a part of the troop heading off to save the world. It is like this for most characters; so there is not a lot of depth, but then we are talking about a book with well hung dogs that hump people to death.
The story is most assuredly strange, and plays out like a satire, but I don't know what it is commenting on if it is; I just think this was written to entertain and fill the world with weird. It does both things in equal measure. The narration is decent. I'm not sue if he couldn't do an accent, but when the MC meets the Russian fellow he should have been using a Russian accent, even if the guy wasn't really Russian, he said he was so there you go. Most of the voices blended together too, so, while you can easily follow and understand everything that Kilgore says easily he doesn't up the game enough to make me give him 5 stars. Same goes for Armfield's writing, there is a lot of sanity shattering concepts, strange and weird things going on, but not a lot of depth to the characters. So, the story or the "quest" has to carry the plot forward, and if you don't care about the characters there is a slight slip that makes it hard to gain traction.
The concept and execution are worthy of a listen, I love weird things, and this fed that need. Even though I did receive a promo code for this review it in no way influenced my considerations of the material, and in fact, inspired me to be more honest. In fact, getting a code generally makes me harsher as a reviewer as I am more often concerned what someone like Me will decide based on my review.
If this review helped, please press the YES below. Thank you immensely!!!
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2 people found this helpful
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- William Armstrong
- 05-28-18
Crude and Hilarious
Beware! This is not for the feint of heart! This is a great short listen if you are a fan of dark and dirty humor. And I must say this is an original story. I have never read about alien dogs with giant wieners! I'd like to see what the author comes up with next!
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- Spooky Mike
- 05-27-18
What will you do if a glory hole opens up for you?
So you can’t look at this book cover and read the publisher’s summary without having a certain expectation of this story. This is a combined tale of save the world and a coming of age story for people who are already grownup and stuck in their ways. Erotic, disgusting, immature, and childhood ruining are just a few words that I would use to describe this. I also would use the words, awesome, bizarre, and funtastic to describe this. A completely unlikely group of people go forth to save the world. Who would imagine that they could attempt it? If you like B movies that are full of T&A and make barely any sense, this is something you would like.
The entire story is straight out of the mind of a twelve-year-old, but something that completely works for people like me. Things got a little confusing because it is all nonsensical, but this took a hell of an imagination and the ability to write it all down. You never know what is coming up next and just when you think you have heard it all, something else happens that flips everything up-end. Seriously, this was an epic story and I’m not sure there is much above for this type. I take my hat off to this author. It was not only crazy but enjoyable and I look forward to more from this him and hopes he stays with his style.
Blain Kilgore does a fantastic job. Only he can read stories like this, bring them to life, and do it with a straight face. BK does great character voices for stories like these type and I’m glad he does. Look forward to hearing more of his narration on stories like these. Glad someone will.
I was voluntarily provided this free review copy audiobook by the author, narrator, or publisher.
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3 people found this helpful
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- Manuel R. Tapia
- 05-11-19
A hilarious horror short!!
Thanks to Hung Hounds I will never step foot inside a bar ever again. Also, I have an unnatural fear of big dicked canine creatures. I would like to find myself a monkey and name it Dookie, only I will force it to wear a fanny pack with speakers blaring out Green Day’s album of the same name. This was a fun ride with laughs and horror.
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