I, Partridge: We Need to Talk About Alan
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Narrated by:
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Alan Partridge
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By:
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Alan Partridge
About this listen
Journalist, presenter, broadcaster, husband, father, vigorous all-rounder – Alan Partridge – a man with a fascinating past and an amazing future. Gregarious and popular, yet Alan’s never happier than when relaxing in his own five-bedroom, south-built house with three acres of land and access to a private stream. But who is this mysterious enigma?
Alan Gordon Partridge is the best – and best-loved – radio presenter in the region. Born into a changing world of rationing, Teddy Boys, apes in space and the launch of ITV, Alan’s broadcasting career began as chief DJ of Radio Smile at St. Luke’s Hospital in Norwich. After replacing Peter Flint as the presenter of Scout About, he entered the top 8 of BBC sports presenters.
But Alan’s big break came with his primetime BBC chat show Knowing Me, Knowing You. Sadly, the show battled against poor scheduling, having been put up against News at Ten, then in its heyday. Due to declining ratings, a single catastrophic hitch (the killing of a guest on air) and the dumbing down of network TV, Alan’s show was cancelled. Not to be dissuaded, he embraced this opportunity to wind up his production company, leave London and fulfil a lifelong ambition to return to his roots in local radio.
Now single, Alan is an intensely private man but he opens up, for the second time, in this candid, entertaining, often deeply emotional – and of course compelling – memoir, written entirely in his own words. (Alan quickly dispelled the idea of using a ghost writer. With a grade B English Language O-Level, he knew he was up to the task.)
He speaks touchingly about his tragic Toblerone addiction, and the painful moment when unsold copies of his first autobiography, Bouncing Back, were pulped like ‘word porridge’. He reveals all about his relationship with his ex-Ukrainian girlfriend, Sonja, with whom he had sex at least twice a day, and the truth about the thick people who make key decisions at the BBC.
A literary tour de force, I, Partridge: We Need to Talk About Alan charts the incredible journey of one of our greatest broadcasters.
©2011 Alan Partridge (P)2011 HarperCollinsListeners also enjoyed...
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Editorial reviews
Critic reviews
‘The funniest book of the year and possibly all time.’ *****Heat
‘This book is a genuinely hilarious read’ Shortlist
‘A rare treat… painfully funny in that inimitable Alan way.’ **** Sunday Express
‘As a parody of celebrity autobiography, it’s sound; but as a sustained piece of comic writing, it’s outstanding.’ **** Time Out
‘Brilliantly witty’ The Times
‘This should be nominated for the Booker prize…it’s a really funny book but it’s actually more than that…it blows my post-modern mind’ David Baddiel
'I, Partridge might just be the funniest book I've ever read. Proper laugh out load moment on every page.' Richard Bacon
‘This fictional memoir … could be the antidote to the celeb biographies that clog the Christmas book market. It's as acute a spoof of the publishing sub-genre as the Alan Partridge character is of a whole tranche of crassly opinionated lowbrow broadcasters…brilliantly sustained wit.’ Evening Standard
‘I, Partridge is an indispensable guide to what it’s like to be an all-round media personality in the 21st Century. In this, it compares very well with the finest in the genre.’ **** Mail on Sunday
***** The Telegraph
‘Extremely funny’ Word Magazine
‘Pure comic genius’ The Independent
‘The best book of the year… without peer… I urge people to go out and buy it.’ Danny Baker
‘An acutely observed mock-memoir, touching on the great man's highs (receiving a Burton's Gold Card) and lows (Toblerone addiction) in equally self-regarding manner.’ Independent on Sunday
‘A magnificent comedy creation’; ‘The significant celebrity book this year.’ The Guardian
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If you like Dawn French - You will love this book!
- By Pamela on 01-22-09
By: Dawn French
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Divorcing Jack
- By: Colin Bateman
- Narrated by: Adam Moore
- Length: 9 hrs and 3 mins
- Unabridged
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Dan Starkey is a young journalist in Belfast, who shares with his wife, Patricia, a prodigious appetite for drinking and dancing. Then Dan meets a beautiful and apparently impoverished student. And then, terrifyingly, she is murdered. Is it because she was not exactly who she claimed to be? Is it the IRA? A Protestant extremist group? A jealous lover? Before long, Dan is a target himself.…
By: Colin Bateman
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How to Be Famous
- A Novel
- By: Caitlin Moran
- Narrated by: Louise Brealey
- Length: 8 hrs and 46 mins
- Unabridged
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A hilarious, heartfelt sequel to How to Build a Girl, the breakout novel from feminist sensation Caitlin Moran who the New York Times called, "rowdy and fearless... sloppy, big-hearted and alive in all the right ways." You can’t have your best friend be famous if you’re not famous. It doesn’t work. You’re emotional pen-friends. You can send each other letters - but you’re not doing anything together. You live in different countries.
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AMAZING , but not for the faint of heart
- By Knitme23 on 07-23-18
By: Caitlin Moran
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How Did All This Happen?
- By: John Bishop
- Narrated by: John Bishop
- Length: 9 hrs and 20 mins
- Unabridged
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If you're a man of a certain age you'll know there comes a point in life when getting a sports car and over-analysing your contribution to society sounds like a really good idea. With a good job in sales and marketing and a nice house in Manchester that he shared with his wife and kids, John Bishop was no different when he turned the dreaded 4-0. But instead of spanking a load of cash on a car that would have made him look like a senior stylist at Vidal Sassoon, he stumbled onto a pathway that ultimately lead him to become one of the nation's best loved comedians.
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Heartwarming and Funny
- By Nancy Burnett on 12-01-22
By: John Bishop
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Watermelon
- By: Marian Keyes
- Narrated by: Gerri Halligan
- Length: 13 hrs and 46 mins
- Unabridged
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At 29, Claire is full of the joys of life - that is, until her husband leaves her on the day she gives birth to her baby. With a broken heart, a beautiful newly born and an expanding mirror image, she decides to visit her eccentric family in Dublin. There she starts to feel better. So much better, in fact, that James is in for a surprise when he decides to slither back into her life....
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A fun read, every time
- By Audrey Smith on 01-06-23
By: Marian Keyes
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You Had Me at Hello
- By: Mhairi McFarlane
- Narrated by: Julie Hesmondhalgh
- Length: 10 hrs and 25 mins
- Unabridged
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What happens when the one that got away comes back? Find out in this sparkling debut from Mhairi McFarlane. Rachel and Ben. Ben and Rachel. It was them against the world. Until it all fell apart. It’s been a decade since they last spoke, but when Rachel bumps into Ben one rainy day, the years melt away. They’d been partners in crime and the best of friends. But life has moved on: Ben is married. Rachel is not. Yet in that split second, Rachel feels the old friendship return. And along with it, the broken heart she’s never been able to mend.
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Narrator ruins it
- By Sandi P on 09-07-16
By: Mhairi McFarlane
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It's Not Me, It's You
- Impossible perfectionist, 27, seeks very very very tidy woman
- By: Jon Richardson
- Narrated by: Jon Richardson
- Length: 3 hrs and 16 mins
- Abridged
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A control freak looks for love (women who leave wet teaspoons in sugar bowls need not apply). ‘I haven’t woken up with a cup of tea by the bed for seven years. It seems such a small thing but it’s one of a thousand things I miss about having someone around to take care of me. I have spent my entire adult life getting things the way I want them and all I want now is someone to give it all up for.’ Jon Richardson. Is your filing faultless? Your CDs, apostrophes, cutlery all in the right places?
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Different, surprising comedy
- By Vasilia on 05-14-12
By: Jon Richardson
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High Dive
- By: Jonathan Lee
- Narrated by: Doyle Gerard
- Length: 11 hrs and 51 mins
- Unabridged
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Taking us inside one of the 20th century's most ambitious assassination attempts - "making history personal", as one character puts it - High Dive moves between the luxurious hospitality of a British tourist town and the troubled city of Belfast, Northern Ireland, at the height of the armed struggle between the Irish Republican Army and those loyal to the UK government.
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Humor? Not Funny.
- By W Perry Hall on 04-10-16
By: Jonathan Lee
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David Mitchell: Back Story
- By: David Mitchell
- Narrated by: David Mitchell
- Length: 9 hrs and 25 mins
- Unabridged
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David Mitchell, who you may know for his inappropriate anger on every TV panel show except Never Mind the Buzzcocks, his look of permanent discomfort on C4 sex comedy Peep Show, his online commenter-baiting in The Observer or just for wearing a stick-on moustache in That Mitchell and Webb Look, has written a book about his life.
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One of the Funniest, Clever Brits around
- By Delia on 08-30-13
By: David Mitchell
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Lie in Wait
- By: G. J. Minett
- Narrated by: Joe Jameson
- Length: 11 hrs and 7 mins
- Unabridged
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Owen Hall drives into a petrol station to let his passenger use the facilities. She never comes back - and what's more, it seems she never even made it inside. When Owen raises a fuss, the police are called - and soon identify Owen himself as a possible culprit, not least because they already have him in the frame for another more sinister crime. Owen's always been a little different, and before long others in the community are baying for his blood. But this is a case where nothing is as it seems - least of all Owen Hall....
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LIE IN WAIT..
- By ZacharyKindle Customer on 08-06-17
By: G. J. Minett
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What Is Not Yours Is Not Yours
- Stories
- By: Helen Oyeyemi
- Narrated by: Ann Marie Gideon, Piter Marek, Bahni Turpin
- Length: 7 hrs and 42 mins
- Unabridged
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In "Books and Roses", one special key opens a library, a garden, and clues to at least two lovers' fates. In "Is Your Blood as Red as This?", an unlikely key opens the heart of a student at a puppeteering school. "'Sorry' Doesn't Sweeten Her Tea" involves a "house of locks", where doors can be closed only with a key - with surprising unobservable developments. And in "If a Book Is Locked There's Probably a Good Reason for That Don't You Think", a key keeps a mystical diary locked (for good reason).
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clever
- By jared rogerson on 03-15-18
By: Helen Oyeyemi
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Us: A Novel
- By: David Nicholls
- Narrated by: David Haig
- Length: 14 hrs and 9 mins
- Unabridged
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Douglas Petersen may be mild-mannered, but behind his reserve lies a sense of humor that seduces beautiful Connie into a second date...and eventually into marriage. Now, almost three decades later, they live more or less happily in the London suburbs with their moody seventeen year-old son, Albie. Then Connie tells him she thinks she wants a divorce. The timing couldn’t be worse. Connie has planned a month-long tour of European capitals, a chance to experience the world’s greatest works of art as a family, and she can’t bring herself to cancel. And maybe going ahead is for the best anyway? Douglas is privately convinced that this landmark trip will rekindle the romance in the marriage, and might even help him to bond with Albie. Narrated from Douglas’s endearingly honest, slyly witty, and at times achingly optimistic point of view, Us is the story of a man trying to rescue his relationship with the woman he loves, and learning how to get closer to a son who’s always felt like a stranger.
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Great novel - my favorite in years
- By Mark on 07-21-15
By: David Nicholls
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Flesh Wounds
- By: Richard Glover
- Narrated by: Richard Glover
- Length: 7 hrs and 12 mins
- Unabridged
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A mother who invented her past, a father who was often absent, a son who wondered if this could really be his family...Richard Glover's favourite dinner-party game is called 'Who's Got the Weirdest Parents?' It's a game he always thinks he'll win. There was his mother, a deluded snob who made up large swathes of her past and who ran away with Richard's English teacher, a Tolkien devotee, nudist and stuffed toy collector.
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Such a Meaningful Reflection
- By Awarenessing on 11-28-15
By: Richard Glover
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Aha! Six BBC Radio 4 episodes featuring the king of chat Alan Partridge (Steve Coogan) in a series of hysterically excruciating encounters with guests played by Rebecca Front, David Schneider, Patrick Marber and Doon Mackichan. Also included are two bonus programmes: a spoof behind-the-scenes feature, Knowing Knowing Me, Knowing You, and In Conversation with Steve Coogan. Duration: 4 hours approx.
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no really an audiobook but still good fun
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Allen Partridge is very entertaining
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In Toast on Toast - part memoir, part "how to act" manual - Steven Toast draws on his vast and varied experiences, providing the reader with an invaluable insight into his journey from school plays to RADA and from "It's a Right Royal Knockout" to the Colony Club. Along the way he reveals the secrets of his success. He discloses how to brush up on and expand your technical and vocal skills, how to nail a professional voiceover, and how to deal with difficult work experience staff in a recording studio....
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Glorious performance from Matt Ber-Ray.
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What listeners say about I, Partridge: We Need to Talk About Alan
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Anonymous User
- 11-18-18
Brilliant
Hilarious writing, great delivery by Coogan. Subversive satire, similar in tone to Stephen Colbert’s I Am America (And So Can You!), having fun with a ridiculous character while painting a picture of East Anglia and its surrounds that will be all the funnier if you’re already familiar with British institutions, culture, etc. Highly recommended.
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- Brian Kennan
- 11-23-19
Health warning: you will laugh aloud as you listen
I loved most of this book - a few chapters dragged - but overall a great laugh - a tonic. Such amazing imagination, satire, and sometimes just plain silliness. I listened as I took my daily walks and found that I was walking along the street laughing out loud, causing folks to look at me as if I had a screw loose.
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- Lachlen
- 05-10-15
aha
aha aha aha aha aha aha aha aha aha aha aha aha aha aha aha ahhaa ahhaa is very good and shit
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2 people found this helpful
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- Pete
- 08-28-18
Literally laughing out loud during my commute.
I honestly thought this would be a serious biography of Steve Coogan. Up to now I mainly listen to biographies of comedians or musicians and a bit of fiction. I'm only 6 chapters in of 30+ but this really is hilarious if you're a fan of Alan Partridge. Highly recommended.
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2 people found this helpful
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- Lindsay Thomas
- 05-04-22
loved it
no other book has made me laugh out loud as much as this did. highly recommend!
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- Mike
- 06-15-12
Even Better Than "Bouncing Back!"
Would you listen to I, Partridge: We Need to Talk About Alan again? Why?
Yes, until Alan gets his much deserved second series, this is the best way to enjoy more Partridge.
What was one of the most memorable moments of I, Partridge: We Need to Talk About Alan?
Learning about Alan's heroic return after his crippling addiction to Toblerones.
Have you listened to any of Alan Partridge’s other performances before? How does this one compare?
Refreshing to hear Alan's version of his life, instead of that impostor Steve Coogan's.
Did you have an extreme reaction to this book? Did it make you laugh or cry?
I laughed so hard that the other train riders thought I was a sexual deviant.
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3 people found this helpful
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- micha
- 12-05-11
Finali a kindred spirit!
Would you listen to I, Partridge: We Need to Talk About Alan again? Why?
Yes, It is verry insightful. Alan is a delightful broadcaster and has a story worth telling
What did you like best about this story?
The personal stile and his abilaty to shift from past to present tence
What about Alan Partridge’s performance did you like?
he has the x factor.
Was this a book you wanted to listen to all in one sitting?
Yes
Any additional comments?
I myself am also in broadcasting And it would be wonderful to have Alan on my show.thank you, Ivo Niehe, Amsterdam
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- Gun Magnet
- 08-17-24
Alan Partridge a double life.
This story is excellent, but there must be more. Is it all just a clever cover? There is more than a pretty face to judge this book of a man's life by. His well known radio persona 'Alan' has lived a full life, from the origin story of his birth, to his assent to radio stardom. What I'd like to know more about is not this alter ego, but of his secret identity Steve Coogan. What is this double life, my bet mi5 super spy. Outwardly 'Alan' plays the fool as did emperor Claudius, Only much like Clark Kent is discarded to reveal Super Man, careful study of every word in this radio biography reveals that Steve is Super...man. What tales of international intrigue could he tell, if only the whole world had security clearance. Until such time as his Super work is declassified, we will have to be satisfied with the smoke and mirrors which is Alan Partridge. I for one am entertained by this work of 'Alan', more so grateful for the secret workings of Steve keeping the world safe. My biggest boy scout salute goes out to both men...which are one super man.
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- scott brisky
- 08-21-12
Everything you wanted to know about Alan.
Steve really did a great job covering the whole Alan story. Extremely funny, dry and consistent with the Alan character. Will listen to this again at some point.
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2 people found this helpful
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- Nicholas L
- 01-12-18
Ruddy Coogan only goes and does it again
Avid Partridge fans won’t be disappointed with Alan’s hysterical ramblings of fortunes and woes.
I am Certainly looking forward to the next chapter in AP’s life.
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