Mr Unavailable and the Fallback Girl
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Narrated by:
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Lucy Price-Lewis
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By:
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Natalie Lue
About this listen
Are you the Fallback Girl? If you've ever found yourself in a relationship that feels and seemingly looks like one, but you're struggling with commitment, or you've been in the ambiguous territory of a "casual relationship", you've likely tried to change them, wondered what you did to cause this, what you can do to win their love and commitment, or even whether you're going crazy.
Mr Unavailable and the Fallback Girl is the definitive guide to understanding the relationship between emotionally unavailable men and the women who love them. From explaining how and why they blow hot and cold to where that future they promised went to, how you've ended up being a booty call, why you've been together for a gazillion years but aren't going anywhere, and more importantly how and why you're involved with them in the first place, all of the answers are here.
You know you're dealing with unavailability when you ask stuff like: What happened to that great guy from the beginning? Why won't he break up or stay away if he doesn't want to commit? What the hell did I do to make him disappear? Is he going to leave her for me? It's because he's shy/busy/scared of his feelings, isn't it? Inspired by the real-life adventures in unavailability of Natalie Lue and the readers of her site, BaggageReclaim.com.
Mr Unavailable and the Fallback Girl is an empowering, entertaining, and inspiring read that will wise you up to pitfalls such as men who aren't over their exes, Future Fakers, guys who have more baggage than a Heathrow terminal, and reappearing childhood sweethearts. If you want to understand your own availability and why commitment in a healthy relationship is eluding you, Mr Unavailable and the Fallback Girl is your guide to being available and attracted to healthy, available partners.
Back in the summer of 2005, Natalie Lue was a single advertising executive wondering out loud on her blog why she had a penchant for unavailable men. Using her site, BaggageReclaim.com, to answer that question while transforming her life, her blog has become a go-to source for understanding emotional unavailability, commitment, dating, relationships and self-esteem while inspiring many thousands of people to change their own relationship habits.
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The Wait
- A Powerful Practice for Finding the Love of Your Life and the Life You Love
- By: DeVon Franklin, Meagan Good
- Narrated by: JD Jackson, Allyson Johnson
- Length: 6 hrs and 12 mins
- Unabridged
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President/CEO of Franklin Entertainment and former Sony Pictures executive DeVon Franklin and award-winning actress Meagan Good have learned sometimes all we can do is wait for "the one" to come into our lives. They spent years crossing paths, but it wasn't until they were thrown together while working on the film Jumping the Broom that their storybook romance began.
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The Wait Caused Me To Change
- By Bernard on 05-02-17
By: DeVon Franklin, and others
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Love Lost, Love Found
- A Woman's Guide to Letting Go of the Past and Finding New Love
- By: Tatiana Jerome
- Narrated by: Margaret Jewell West
- Length: 4 hrs and 28 mins
- Unabridged
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Blindsided by a breakup, and asking herself the usual why, how, what questions, Tatiana Jerome went online. She used social media as a way to uplift and empower herself by venting but also working through her own part in the relationship's demise. Her posts struck a chord with thousands and then hundreds of thousands of readers - no surprise since most relationships (approximately 85 percent) end.
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Nice
- By Ms. Keisha on 11-13-17
By: Tatiana Jerome
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Living with the Passive-Aggressive Man
- Coping with Hidden Aggression - From the Bedroom to the Boardroom
- By: Scott Wetzler Ph.D.
- Narrated by: Matthew Josdal
- Length: 6 hrs and 54 mins
- Unabridged
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Do you know one of these men? The catch-me-if-you-can lover...Phil's romantic and passionate one minute, distant and cold the next. The deviously manipulative coworker or boss...Jack denies resenting Nora's rapid rise in the company, but when they're assigned to work together on a project, he undermines her. The obstructionist, procrastinating husband...Bob keeps telling his wife he'll finish the painting job he began years ago, but he never seems to get around to it. These are all classic examples of the passive aggressive man.
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A good review of the PA type man
- By Dew on 12-29-17
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Super You
- Release Your Inner Superhero
- By: Emily Gordon
- Narrated by: Emily Gordon
- Length: 7 hrs and 37 mins
- Unabridged
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Superheroes don't start from glorious beginnings. Their origins are almost always marked by traumatic events that leave them helpless and scared. Batman witnessed his parents' murder. Superman was sent away from his dying planet with no one to guide him as he grew up. Orphaned Catwoman was forced to steal food to survive on the streets of Gotham. What makes these superheroes super is their determination to not be defined by helplessness. They embrace their origins, their flaws, and their mistakes and strive every day to become the best versions of themselves.
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A wonderful book filled with empathy and humanity.
- By Vincent on 10-06-15
By: Emily Gordon
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The Breakup Bible
- The Smart Woman's Guide to Healing from a Breakup or Divorce
- By: Rachel Sussman
- Narrated by: Susan Boyce
- Length: 12 hrs and 6 mins
- Unabridged
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Psychotherapist and breakup expert Rachel A. Sussman, LCSW, reveals the secrets every woman needs to get her life back on track. Drawing on hundreds of counseling sessions she's conducted with women at all stages of recovery, Sussman developed a proven three-phase process for healing from a breakup.
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lifesaver!
- By Dawson on 11-30-17
By: Rachel Sussman
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The Undervalued Self
- By: Elaine N. Aron
- Narrated by: Marguerite Gavin
- Length: 7 hrs and 54 mins
- Unabridged
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Elaine Aron follows up her best sellers on the highly sensitive person with a groundbreaking new book on the undervalued self. She explains that self-esteem results from having a healthy balance of love and power in our lives. Readers will learn to incorporate love into situations that seem to require power and deal with power struggles that mask themselves as issues of love.
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Life Changing!
- By Salon Finished Dawn on 09-20-15
By: Elaine N. Aron
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10 Stupid Things Couples Do To Mess Up Their Relationships
- By: Dr. Laura Schlessinger
- Narrated by: Dr. Laura Schlessinger
- Length: 2 hrs and 37 mins
- Abridged
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In Ten Stupid Things Couples Do to Mess Up Their Relationships, Dr. Laura Schlessinger calls for a return to traditional courtship. Courtship allows couples and their families to get acquainted with each other over a longer period of time, and provides structure and guidelines for that important process.
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No brainer ideas that we can forget
- By Ali0531 on 07-06-15
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When Good People Have Affairs
- Inside the Hearts & Minds of People in Two Relationships
- By: Mira Kirshenbaum
- Narrated by: Callie Beaulieu
- Length: 6 hrs and 28 mins
- Unabridged
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A world-renowned therapist, Mira Kirshenbaum has treated thousands of people caught in the powerful drama over what to do when an affair rocks their emotional lives. Now, in When Good People Have Affairs, Kirshenbaum puts her unsurpassed experience into one clear, calming place. She leads listeners through six easy-to-navigate steps that will take anyone from anxiety to clarity, and identifies 17 types of affairs, helping listeners figure out which type they're in and what it means.
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This book condones affairs
- By Summer Phillips on 06-18-18
By: Mira Kirshenbaum
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How to Get Over a Boy
- By: Chidera Eggerue
- Narrated by: Chidera Eggerue
- Length: 3 hrs and 36 mins
- Unabridged
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In How to Get Over a Boy, Chidera Eggerue will show you, once and for all, how to reframe the stale goal of finding a man. She will equip you with tangible and applicable solutions for every part of your dating life, helping you recognise that men hold as much power in our romantic lives as we grant them. In the past, dating books tend to lean more into the territory of 'how to make him find you hot!', 'how to make him jealous!', 'how to get him to propose!'. But these how-tos are placing men on a pedestal of being 'the prize'. Men are never the prize. You are.
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Touching
- By Erika Soler on 04-21-20
By: Chidera Eggerue
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Codependent No More
- How to Stop Controlling Others and Start Caring for Yourself
- By: Melody Beattie
- Narrated by: Melody Beattie
- Length: 8 hrs and 42 mins
- Unabridged
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Is someone else's problem your problem? If, like so many others, you've lost sight of your own life in the drama of tending to a loved one’s self-destructive behavior, you may be codependent—and you may find yourself in this book. With personal reflections, exercises, and instructive stories drawn from Beattie’s own life and the lives of those she’s counseled, Codependent No More helps you break old patterns and maintain healthy boundaries, and offers a clear and achievable path to healing, hope, freedom, and happiness.
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great book with unbearable reader
- By Nielah on 09-01-22
By: Melody Beattie
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It's Not My Fault
- The No-Excuse Plan to Put You in Charge of Your Life
- By: Henry Cloud, John Townsend
- Narrated by: Henry Cloud, John Townsend
- Length: 6 hrs and 18 mins
- Unabridged
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Using eight principles, a variety of true stories and their years of experience as professional psychologists, Cloud and Townsend enlighten readers on how to make empowering choices-and how to build the life they want to live. It may seem impossible but it's true: taking personal responsibility is not only liberating, it is the best-and perhaps the only-way for a person to get what they really want out of life.
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TOP BOOK of 2009
- By David on 03-14-11
By: Henry Cloud, and others
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Loving People
- How to Love and Be Loved
- By: John Townsend
- Narrated by: Matthew Josdal
- Length: 7 hrs and 34 mins
- Unabridged
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Best-selling author Dr. John Townsend teaches you that love can actually be learned and gives you the steps and tools to become skilled in love. Using his trademark stories to flesh out the important principles, Dr. Townsend covers receiving love, connecting love, healing love, confronting love, romantic love, and surrendering love. Through his teaching, listeners will discover - and start enjoying - the words, actions, and experiences of authentic love.
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Very insightful
- By Amazon Customer on 05-17-19
By: John Townsend
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Frientimacy
- How to Deepen Friendships for Lifelong Health and Happiness
- By: Shasta Nelson
- Narrated by: Robin Eller
- Length: 8 hrs and 31 mins
- Unabridged
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In Frientimacy, award-winning speaker Shasta Nelson shows how anyone can form stronger, more meaningful friendships, marked by a level of trust she calls "frientimacy". Shasta explores the most common complaints and conflicts facing female friendships today, and lays out strategies for overcoming these pitfalls to create deeper, supportive relationships that last for the long-term.
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I didn't finish it, but I still recommend it
- By Emily on 10-21-17
By: Shasta Nelson
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Time and again, some women fall for someone who for one reason or another will never return their feelings. The object of their affection may be emotionally unavailable, married, or even pathologically cruel. The woman who routinely finds herself in this situation suffers mightily, feeling rejected, unloved, undesirable. With empathy and compassion, Dr. Marni Feuerman helps women see their situations clearly, understand the historical, emotional, and psychological reasons behind their actions, and most importantly, make better choices for themselves.
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A guy who rejects or breaks up with you should no longer exist in your life. Contacting him or allowing him to stay in touch with you will make you work harder and harder to convince him that you’re worth his love and attention, and it will compel you to play that ugly and unwinnable game called Chase-a-Man. The best way to avoid this ugly game and break his spell over you is to cut the guy off (cease all communications and interactions) for a set period of time, or in some cases, keep him cut off out of your life indefinitely.
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Ghosted and Breadcrumbed
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Great title but
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Bitch Up! Expect More, Get More
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Unpretentious, upfront advice for perpetual man-pleasers who want to stop repeating the same mistakes over and over but don't know how. Have you ever cried, begged, and bargained for a man to take you back after a breakup? Have you been called the crazy ex? Have you ever had a breakdown after a breakup? If so, Bitch Up! Expect More, Get More is a must-listen to help you through a breakup to get you ready for a future relationship better than you could ever imagine.
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Misleading title- Do not waste your time reading
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Getting Past Your Breakup
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It’s over - and it really hurts. But as unbelievable as it may seem when you are in the throes of heartache, you can move past your breakup. Forget about trying to win your ex back. Forget about losing yourself and trying to make this person love you. Forget it! Starting today, this breakup is the best time to change your life for the better, inside and out. Getting Past Your Breakup is a proven road map for overcoming the painful end of any romantic relationship, even divorce.
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Wow...
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Avoidant
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People in relationships with avoidants struggle with their lack of responsiveness and inability to tolerate real intimacy. Relationships between an avoidant and a partner of another attachment type are the largest group of unhappy relationships, and people who love their partners and who may have started families and had children with an avoidant will work very hard to try to make their relationships work better, out of love for their partner and children as well as their own happiness.
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Derogatory towards woman/outdated/ female shaming
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Breakup Bootcamp
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In Breakup Bootcamp, Amy Chan directs her experience as a relationship columnist and as the creator of Renew Breakup Bootcamp into a practical, thoughtful guide to turning broken hearts into an opportunity to break out of complacency and destructive habits. Dubbed "the Chief Heart Hacker," Amy Chan grounds her practical advice and tried and tested methods rooted in cutting-edge psychology and research, helping first her bootcamp attendees and now her listeners most effectively heal and reclaim their self-love.
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yeah... because men don't suffer
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Win Your Breakup
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You picked up this book because your breakup has been reduced to something that you feel you must “win” to emotionally survive and move on. This reduction can only take place if you were involved with a toxic person. Toxic people are selfish, empathetically bankrupt, and have a limited relationship with reality. Anyone who feels validated by exploiting your hunger for theirs is toxic - to your peace, your life, and your mental health.
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It’s like a bad gossip girl episode
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Red Flags
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Learn secrets about men and the dishonest games they play that most women will never know. Most women are very surprised when a man becomes distant, when they find out he wasn't as interested as he seemed, or worse, when everything he said turns out to be a blatant lie. It's time to use the secrets of the men who "play" games with women.
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Matter of fact
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By: Brian Keephimattracted, and others
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Calling in "The One" (Revised and Expanded)
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Love-seekers today have to deal with a precarious terrain of dating and partnering that seems to encourage a lack of commitment and clarity. Calling in “The One” will empower you to have a radically different experience by shifting your painful patterns in love from the inside out, graduating you from unsatisfying relationships and unleashing your power to manifest the happy, healthy love you desire.
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Get Ready for self acceptance and change!
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Women Who Love Too Much
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Is having 'somebody to love' the most important thing in your life? Do you constantly believe that with 'the right man' you would no longer feel depressed or lonely? Are you bored with 'nice guys' who are open, honest, and dependable? If being in love means being in pain, this book was written for you. Therapist Robin Norwood describes loving too much as a pattern of thoughts and behavior, which certain women develop as a response to problems from childhood.
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Offers recovery steps.
- By sasha on 04-21-15
By: Robin Norwood
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Love Unfu*ked
- Getting Your Relationship Sh!t Together
- By: Gary John Bishop
- Narrated by: Gary John Bishop
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No matter how much advice we get or how much work we do on our “stuff,” nothing ever seems to make the difference. The truth of it is, you’re woefully ill-equipped for one of the most life-defining things you will ever take on—being in a committed relationship. Whether you’re currently in one, want to be in one, half in–half out, getting over one, married, single, separated, divorced, or just overwhelmed with the whole thing, let’s cut through the morass of relationship schtick and put you back in charge.
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A candid kick in the a$$ about your relationships
- By Tranquility38 on 01-18-22
By: Gary John Bishop
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Becoming the Narcissist's Nightmare
- How to Devalue and Discard the Narcissist While Supplying Yourself
- By: Shahida Arabi
- Narrated by: Julie McKay
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- Unabridged
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Although clinical research has been conducted on narcissism as a disorder, less is known about its effects on victims who are in toxic relationships with partners with Narcissistic Personality Disorder. Individuals with this disorder engage in chronic devaluation and manipulation of their partners, a psychological and emotional phenomenon known as "narcissistic abuse". Unfortunately, the full extent of what narcissistic abuse entails is not taught in any psychology class or diagnostic manual.
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Finally
- By zero on 12-08-16
By: Shahida Arabi
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Communicate Your Feelings (Without Starting a Fight)
- What to Say and What Not to Say to Your Partner
- By: Nic Saluppo
- Narrated by: Colin Kibler
- Length: 2 hrs and 20 mins
- Unabridged
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Being in a relationship without knowing how to share your feelings and receive your partner’s feelings in useful ways is like jumping into a pool without knowing how to swim. You can flail around all you want, but it’s not going to keep you afloat for very long—you need to be able to move in any direction at will. Like swimming, knowing how to share your feelings and respond to your partner's feelings will move your relationship in the direction you want: toward more intimacy, closeness, connection, and trust.
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Marriage saving!
- By J Keegan on 02-07-23
By: Nic Saluppo
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The Overthinking in Relationships Fix
- Toxic Thoughts That Can Destroy Your Relationship and How to Fix Them
- By: Rodney Noble
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If constant overthinking is turning your happy relationship into a battlefield, you're not alone. This book will be your lifeline. It dives deep into the toxic thoughts that can creep into any relationship, whispering doubts and insecurities. You'll learn how these overactive mental gymnastics can sabotage your connection and leave you feeling anxious and drained. But fear not! This guide is packed with practical strategies to help you break free from these negative thought patterns.
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Good description of a problem
- By Lara Bryant on 01-11-22
By: Rodney Noble
What listeners say about Mr Unavailable and the Fallback Girl
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- Tobhiyah
- 08-10-15
100% Yes.
If you're even looking at this review, answer is yes, definitely buy the book. It is fantastic! More amazingness than I can even begin to tell you.
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- Mel
- 12-29-17
Mandatory
I wish I encountered something like this decades ago. Sage, practical wisdom for anyone with less than healthy relationships. Truly a life saver!
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- Marilyn
- 09-16-17
LOVED the entertaining lecture :-)
Wonderfully narrated... not only extremely funny, but also gave me tremendous strength and insight into my own unavailability. Today is the first day of the rest of my life.
p.s. I may even listen to it again...
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- Greta
- 02-14-20
great 4 the girl confused
2 yrs ive been in a fallback girl relationship with an unavailable man. this book was eye opening.
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- Amanda Lynn
- 07-08-24
Perfect read for anyone who feels a little stuck
I have reread this book many times now. This really helped me after my divorce to learn more about myself before making the same mistakes all my other divorced friends made by jumping into the next relationship to soon. I love that she’s honest and the stories are relatable. She covers every kind of relationship I have ever had. Thank for sharing your stories and reminding me that I can have more if I don’t settle.
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- B. BROUSSARD
- 08-06-17
I think I need the follow up book
I came to this book with pretty good knowledge that I was a fall back girl and it was my own responsibility and in order to move to healthy relationships I needed more information. This book definitely helped me erase any of my inner flip-flopping or desire to distract myself from the reality of things by trying to fix others or buffer or be buffered. I need to go back through it one more time and peel out the reconstruction of life parts. The descriptions over-layered for me and my experiences and that was reassuring creating a readiness to deepen my self esteem and use my fix-it energies in healthy ways that don't include relationship. I'm sure a healthy relationship is work of it's own but I can imagine with two people having the same goal and skills it's got to be easier and less drama and chaos filled than what I've done so far.
The performance was good I just took a while to acclimate to the accent and I wish I'd known the cultural references weren't American. It's all good, it just takes an inner moment of conversion and with so much covered that effects me deeply I feel I'll need to go through it again and take notes.
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6 people found this helpful
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- Kindle Customer
- 07-25-21
Great book
Great narration! I have listened to this twice now and will definitely listen to it again. Something about hearing a voice saying it that makes it stick.
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- Amazon Customer
- 07-22-22
Great listen
I throughly enjoyed this book, because I have found myself committed to a mr. Unavailable as of recently and he and the relationship checked off MANY boxes. With me already being on my journey of cutting ties for good this book has been an additional guide along with professional counseling. I will no longer allow myself to be ANYONE’S fallback girl.
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- E. Calero
- 02-05-18
Amazing Advice Book
Insightful and valuable advice on regaining your self respect. Natalie Lue does a better job than most therapists in understanding the mindset of unavailable men and women. I highly recommend reading the book several times due to the high volume of important information provided. A great self improvement guide!
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- Anonymous User
- 07-31-18
Very helpful
The author explores the complex dynamics of unavailable relationships in a way that is direct, concrete and digestible. Great narration, she really brings it to life.
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