NurtureShock
New Thinking About Children
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Narrated by:
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Po Bronson
About this listen
Audie Award, Personal Development, 2010
In a world of modern, involved, caring parents, why are so many kids aggressive and cruel? Where is intelligence hidden in the brain, and why does that matter? Why do cross-racial friendships decrease in schools that are more integrated? If 98% of kids think lying is morally wrong, then why do 98% of kids lie? What's the single most important thing that helps infants learn language?
NurtureShock is a groundbreaking collaboration between award-winning science journalists Po Bronson and Ashley Merryman. They argue that when it comes to children, we've mistaken good intentions for good ideas. With impeccable storytelling and razor-sharp analysis, they demonstrate that many of modern society's strategies for nurturing children are in fact backfiring - because key twists in the science have been overlooked.
Nothing like a parenting manual, the authors' work is an insightful exploration of themes and issues that transcend children's (and adults') lives.
©2009 Po Bronson (P)2009 HachetteListeners also enjoyed...
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Editorial reviews
Starting with the introduction, in a loving, but firm voice, journalist and author Po Bronson delivers the bad news to parents: everything you know about parenting is wrong.
Bronson and collaborator Ashley Merryman willingly indict themselves, along with all of American society, in that collective "you", as they confront again and again our abundant misconceptions about parenting and the nature of children, when exploring the newest research findings in the science of child development.
Bronson and Merryman do not debate the existence of a biological imperative to nurture. in fact, they wholeheartedly accept that all parents possess the innate instinct to "nurture and protect" their kids, and even report that current research supports the location of this impulse in the brain with physical evidence. instead, the book, and its title, are meant to invoke the shock most new parents experience when they open up their bundles of joy, eager to get started and realize the manual is missing.
As a guilty participant in many of the contemporary parenting practices referred to in the book, it was a pleasure to receive my verbal spanking in Bronson's nebbish and neighborly tone, rather than the authoritative and detached voice of yet another social scientist detailing the 10 new ways i'm failing as a mother.
Perhaps because he himself admits to being "father knows less", rather than best, i was better able to withstand his slaughter of a wide range of our current parenting sacred cows, such as:
- kids are positively powered by praise (then why do so many run out of self-esteem?)
- too much TV makes children fat (actually, it's too-little sleep), but at least today's gentle programming is making them less aggressive (wrong, again!)
- and my child is color-blind when it comes to race (blind maybe, but not deaf or dumb)
Bronson's steady and measured narration moves the serious subject matter along nicely and creates an atmosphere of inclusion and intimacy for the reader not easily achieved with nonfiction. We can share his sincere surprise, evident in his voice, when confronted with the many 360-degree reversals in thinking that the latest research demands.
i do wish Ms. Merryman had shared in the narration of the book, if only for a glimpse into her personal feelings on each topic. But it's easy to believe their assertion that they were moved to change their own parenting and teaching practices inspired by their findings. i've already made subtle changes in dealing with my seven-year old based on Chapter 4, "Why Kids Lie", with remarkable success. Lisa Duggan
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Parenting Beyond Pink & Blue
- How to Raise Your Kids Free of Gender Stereotypes
- By: Christia Spears Brown PhD
- Narrated by: Stina Nielsen
- Length: 8 hrs and 16 mins
- Unabridged
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In this practical guide, developmental psychologist (and mother of two) Christia Spears Brown uses science-based research to show how over-dependence on gender can limit kids, making it harder for them to develop into unique individuals. With a humorous, fresh, and accessible perspective, Parenting Beyond Pink & Blue addresses all the issues that contemporary parents should consider - from gender-segregated birthday parties and schools to sports, sexualization, and emotional intelligence.
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Not a parenting guide but a description of norms.
- By Anonymous User on 08-15-20
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The Marshmallow Test
- Mastering Self-Control
- By: Walter Mischel
- Narrated by: Alan Alda
- Length: 7 hrs and 54 mins
- Unabridged
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In The Marshmallow Test, Mischel explains how self-control can be mastered and applied to challenges in everyday life - from weight control to quitting smoking, overcoming heartbreak, making major decisions, and planning for retirement. With profound implications for the choices we make in parenting, education, public policy and self-care, The Marshmallow Test will change the way you think about who we are and what we can be.
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Great performance, but lacking in content
- By Hilary - San Francisco on 09-27-14
By: Walter Mischel
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WHY Do They Act That Way?
- A Survival Guide to the Adolescent Brain for You and Your Teen
- By: David Walsh, Nat Bennett
- Narrated by: Kaleo Griffith
- Length: 9 hrs and 2 mins
- Unabridged
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Even smart kids do stupid things. It's a simple fact of life. No one makes it through the teenage years unscathed - not the teens and not their parents. But now there's expert help for both generations in this groundbreaking new guide for surviving the drama of adolescence. In WHY Do They Act That Way? nationally renowned, award-winning psychologist Dr. David Walsh explains exactly what happens to the human brain on the path from childhood into adolescence and adulthood.
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LOVE!!
- By Amazon Customer on 05-11-23
By: David Walsh, and others
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Age of Opportunity
- Lessons from the New Science of Adolescence
- By: Laurence Steinberg Ph.D.
- Narrated by: Malcolm Hillgartner
- Length: 8 hrs and 49 mins
- Unabridged
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Adolescence now lasts longer than ever before. And as world-renowned expert on adolescent psychology Dr. Laurence Steinberg argues, this makes these years the key period in determining individuals’ life outcomes, demanding that we change the way we parent, educate, and understand young people.
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if you think you know, think again
- By Dk on 12-11-14
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The Dolphin Way
- A Parent's Guide to Raising Healthy, Happy, and Motivated Kids - without Turning into a Tiger
- By: Shimi Kang
- Narrated by: Karen Saltus
- Length: 9 hrs and 26 mins
- Unabridged
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The Dolphin Way walks readers through Dr. Kang’s four-part method for cultivating self-motivation. The audiobook makes a powerful case that we are not forced to choose between being permissive or controlling. The third option—the option that will prepare our kids for success in a future that will require adaptability - is the dolphin way.
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Very easy way to understand complicated subject
- By Nhat on 11-05-18
By: Shimi Kang
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Attack of the Teenage Brain
- Understanding and Supporting the Weird and Wonderful Adolescent Learner
- By: John Medina
- Narrated by: John Medina
- Length: 6 hrs and 16 mins
- Unabridged
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In accessible language and with periodic references to Star Trek, motorcycle daredevils, and near-classic movies of the '80s, developmental molecular biologist John Medina explores the neurological and evolutionary factors that drive teenage behavior and can affect both achievement and engagement. Then he proposes a research-supported counterattack: a bold redesign of educational practices and learning environments to deliberately develop teens' cognitive capacity to manage their emotions, plan, prioritize, and focus.
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Wish I knew years ago
- By John Wernecke on 05-30-18
By: John Medina
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It's OK to Go up the Slide
- Renegade Rules for Raising Confident and Creative Kids
- By: Heather Shumaker
- Narrated by: Laurel Lefkow
- Length: 9 hrs and 52 mins
- Unabridged
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Heather Shumaker has sparked much discussion with her "renegade rules for raising competent and compassionate kids". In this follow-up book, she takes on new hot-button issues like banning homework, technology use, and skipping kindergarten. Shumaker offers broader guidance on how parents can control their own anger and move from an overscheduled life to one of more free play.
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Amazing resource for parents and teachers
- By Ahmed on 05-11-16
By: Heather Shumaker
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The Gentle Sleep Book
- For Calm Babies, Toddlers and Pre-Schoolers
- By: Sarah Ockwell-Smith
- Narrated by: Katy Sobey
- Length: 8 hrs and 45 mins
- Unabridged
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The Gentle Sleep Book offers gentle, no-tears sleep solutions for exhausted parents of newborns to five-year-olds. A large percentage of parents find their young children's sleep - or lack of - challenging. This new audiobook from Sarah Ockwell-Smith, founder of BabyCalm, will be an indispensable guide for parents, whatever challenges they are facing with their child's sleep - from the day they bring their newborn home until their child is settled in at school.
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It's fine but not much about 2-4 years
- By Patrick on 02-12-18
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Smarter
- The New Science of Building Brain Power
- By: Dan Hurley
- Narrated by: Erik Synnestvedt
- Length: 8 hrs and 12 mins
- Unabridged
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Expanding upon one of the most-read New York Times Magazine features of 2012, Smarter penetrates the hot new field of intelligence research to reveal what researchers call a revolution in human intellectual abilities. Shattering decades of dogma, scientists began publishing studies in 2008 showing that "fluid intelligence" - the ability to learn, solve novel problems, and get to the heart of things - can be increased through training. But is it all just hype?
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People Who Like This Sort of Thing....
- By W Perry Hall on 10-10-15
By: Dan Hurley
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The New Dare to Discipline
- By: James C. Dobson
- Narrated by: Mike Trout
- Length: 2 hrs and 57 mins
- Abridged
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Why are boundaries so important? Do children really want limits set on their behavior? Is it okay to spank my child, or will it lead him to hit others and become a violent person? Join the millions of caring parents who have found much-needed answers to their questions in the wisdom of parenting expert and family counselor Dr. James Dobson.
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Well written, and very easy to listen to!
- By jeff lukasik on 01-12-18
By: James C. Dobson
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Choke
- What the Secrets of the Brain Reveal About Getting It Right When You Have To
- By: Sian Beilock
- Narrated by: Suzanne Toren
- Length: 11 hrs and 13 mins
- Unabridged
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Beilock examines how attention and working memory guide human performance, how experience and practice and brain development interact to create our abilities, and how stress affects all these factors.
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Buzz Word Festival
- By andrew on 10-04-10
By: Sian Beilock
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Brain Rules (Updated and Expanded)
- 12 Principles for Surviving and Thriving at Work, Home, and School
- By: John Medina
- Narrated by: John Medina
- Length: 8 hrs
- Unabridged
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In the New York Times bestseller Brain Rules, Dr. John Medina, a molecular biologist, shares his lifelong interest in how the brain sciences might influence the way we teach our children and the way we work. In each chapter, he describes a brain rule - what scientists know for sure about how our brains work - and then offers transformative ideas for our daily lives. Medina’s fascinating stories and infectious sense of humor breathe life into brain science.
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Dear Publishers . . .
- By Bekah on 04-06-17
By: John Medina
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Whatever It Takes
- Geoffrey Canada's Quest to Change Harlem and America
- By: Paul Tough
- Narrated by: Ax Norman
- Length: 10 hrs and 19 mins
- Unabridged
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What would it take?That was the question that Geoffrey Canada found himself asking. What would it take to change the lives of poor children, not one by one, through heroic interventions and occasional miracles, but in big numbers, and in a way that could be replicated nationwide? The question led him to create the Harlem Children's Zone, a 97-block laboratory in central Harlem where he is testing new and sometimes controversial ideas about poverty in America.
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Aboslutely terrific!
- By Anthony on 09-21-10
By: Paul Tough
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The Formula
- Unlocking the Secrets to Raising Highly Successful Children
- By: Ronald F. Ferguson, Tatsha Robertson
- Narrated by: Cynthia Farrell
- Length: 10 hrs and 4 mins
- Unabridged
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In The Formula: Unlocking the Secrets to Raising Highly Successful Children, Harvard economist Ronald Ferguson, named in a New York Times profile as the foremost expert on the US educational "achievement gap," along with award-winning journalist Tatsha Robertson, reveal an intriguing blueprint for helping children from all types of backgrounds become successful adults.
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would recommend
- By Marcia on 02-25-20
By: Ronald F. Ferguson, and others
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Okay read. Won’t read a second time
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Terrible narration
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How Children Succeed
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The story we usually tell about childhood and success is the one about intelligence: success comes to those who score highest on tests, from preschool admissions to SATs. But in How Children Succeed, Paul Tough argues that the qualities that matter most have more to do with character: skills like perseverance, curiosity, conscientiousness, optimism, and self-control. How Children Succeed introduces us to a new generation of researchers and educators who, for the first time, are using the tools of science to peel back the mysteries of character.
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Article based on interviews
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Raising an Emotionally Intelligent Child
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Based on 20 years of research at the University of Washington studying parent-child interactions, award-winning research psychologist John Gottman and his team have developed Emotion Coaching - a technique parents can use to teach their children self-awareness and self-control and to foster good emotional development. This proven technique has demonstrated a positive effect on children's physical health, academic achievement, and emotional well-being.
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My parenting philosophy, in writing!
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Just Ok
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It’s time to change the way we see babies. Drawing on principles developed by the educator Dr Maria Montessori, The Montessori Baby shows how to raise your baby from birth to age one with love, respect, insight, and a surprising sense of calm. Cowritten by Simone Davies, author of the bestselling The Montessori Toddler, and Junnifa Uzodike, it’s a book filled with hundreds of practical ideas for understanding what is actually happening with your baby, and how you can mindfully assist in their learning and development.
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Fantastic but better in book or Kindle form
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Positive Discipline
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For 25 years, Positive Discipline has been the gold standard reference for grown-ups working with children. Now Jane Nelsen, distinguished psychologist, educator, and mother of seven, has written a revised and expanded edition. The key to positive discipline is not punishment, she tells us, but mutual respect. Nelsen coaches parents and teachers to be both firm and kind, so that any child - from a three-year-old toddler to a rebellious teenager - can learn creative cooperation and self-discipline with no loss of dignity.
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Terrible audio
- By Qwerty123456789 on 11-15-18
By: Jane Nelsen EdD
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Dumbing Us Down (25th Anniversary Edition)
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Throw off the shackles of formal schooling and embark upon a rich journey of self-directed, life-long learning After over 100 years of mandatory schooling in the U.S., literacy rates have dropped, families are fragmented, learning "disabilities" are skyrocketing, and children and youth are increasingly disaffected. Thirty years of teaching in the public school system led John Taylor Gatto to the sad conclusion that compulsory governmental schooling is to blame, accomplishing little but to teach young people to follow orders like cogs in an industrial machine.
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Book content
- By sandswoodward on 07-15-24
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How to Talk So Little Kids Will Listen
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- By: Joanna Faber, Julie King
- Narrated by: Heather Alicia Simms, Michele Pawk, Candace Thaxton, and others
- Length: 10 hrs and 8 mins
- Unabridged
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What do you do with a little kid who...won't brush her teeth...screams in his car seat...pinches the baby...refuses to eat vegetables...runs rampant in the supermarket? Organized according to common challenges and conflicts, this book is an essential emergency first-aid manual of communication strategies, including a chapter that addresses the special needs of children with sensory processing and autism spectrum disorders.
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The message is great but the narration and writing style cringey
- By Elliott Family on 07-23-19
By: Joanna Faber, and others
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The Danish Way of Parenting
- What the Happiest People in the World Know About Raising Confident, Capable Kids
- By: Jessica Joelle Alexander, Dissing Sandahl
- Narrated by: Kim Mai Guest
- Length: 3 hrs and 28 mins
- Unabridged
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What makes Denmark the happiest country in the world - and how do Danish parents raise happy, confident, successful kids, year after year? This upbeat and practical book presents six essential principles, which spell out P-A-R-E-N-T. With illuminating examples and simple yet powerful advice, The Danish Way of Parenting will help parents from all walks of life raise the happiest, most well-adjusted kids in the world.
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Obvious parenting tips unrelated to Danes
- By Rachel H. on 09-24-16
By: Jessica Joelle Alexander, and others
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Brainstorm
- The Power and Purpose of the Teenage Brain
- By: Daniel J. Siegel M.D.
- Narrated by: Daniel J. Siegel M.D.
- Length: 10 hrs and 48 mins
- Unabridged
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Between the ages of twelve and twenty-four, the brain changes in important and, at times, challenging ways. In Brainstorm, the renowned psychiatrist and bestselling author of Parenting from the Inside Out, The Whole-Brain Child, and Mindsight, Daniel Siegel busts a number of commonly held myths about adolescence — for example, that it is merely a stage of “immaturity” filled with often “crazy” behavior — to reveal how it is in fact a vital time in our lives in terms of charting the course for the adults we ultimately become.
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Narration for kindergarteners...
- By Kalutha on 03-28-14
What listeners say about NurtureShock
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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Overall
- Heather
- 08-16-11
Excellent Book, Not a Great Audiobook
I am a fan of Po Bronson's writing; turns out his reading... not so much. Still, if you're not going to read this book, you should at least listen to it, especially if you are a parent or teacher. The problem with Bronson's reading, and this may not bother other people, is that every single sentence has at least one word on which he puts great emphasis. Every single sentence. After ten or fifteen minutes, this cadence becomes a little annoying. And this book is eight hours long...
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8 people found this helpful
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- Jeremy
- 06-13-13
Yeah, I kind of knew that already..
As a new parent, I felt like reading about children even though I find the general purpose of this unclear given that knowing what to do is the easier, but doing it is a different story.
NurtureShock is sold off as "new thinking" but, to be honest, there's nothing very new about anything there and I was telling a friend about what the book said and that person wasn't surprised. Certainly, praising a child's intelligence might increase the fear of failing. Sure, indifference can be worse than fight. And, yes, it's good to interact/speak with baby.
This is not so much new thinking, as mainly everybody knows what is there, but a question of whether parents are really willing to do it; as I said, knowing something does not mean you would like to do it. Most parents might want their kid to feel good about themselves, not maximize intellectual prowess, or do not want to be facing constant fights between siblings, or do not want to be constantly exchanging with baby. I am not saying that that these are good things, but that presenting these as grand insights are like teaching that eating burgers every day is probably not the best diet choice.
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- Jason
- 06-09-18
Great stats and studies!
Although some of the studies and the delivery of their results takes a little while, they are totally worthwhile!
Great insights and understanding of tots to teens, and some of it I'll definitely use in my future as a Father. loved the studies and the fact that the results are not what you'd expect, and at times counter intuitive. Helps me realise that as a society we are not all correct all the time and we Can get caught up in fads that will fade out.
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- Pamela
- 10-31-09
Nurture Shock is enlightening
The book openned up the readers mind to look at child rearing differently and also blew open some of the myths that have captured our culture. I feel as if what feels natural is what works...and so much of what we have done really was unnatural and did not work as we would have exprected. Good read if you are a parent ....
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- Craig
- 10-01-10
Helps to expand our minds and well worth my time
I'm always looking for a better way help my family and I know I dont have all the answers. This helped expand my mind a little more. I try to get at least one lesson from a book. I now praise my kids in a better way.
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- Amazon Customer
- 12-31-16
great
Nurture Shock was full of new and valuable info both as a parent and a human.
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- arox
- 04-17-16
Thought-provoking, but needed a pro narrator
Would you say that listening to this book was time well-spent? Why or why not?
There are a lot of ideas in here that I thought were spot-on. Some examples are the inverse power of praise, that children are significantly affected by a lack of sleep, etc. It is a very worthwhile read for parents and teachers. I have read some legitimate criticisms of this book, but I would take those with a grain of salt. Some reviewers have said that it lacks scientific support for the conclusions it draws, but I don't think this book claims to be an airtight meta-analysis. A book like this is meant to be thought-provoking, and it should not be taken as child-rearing Gospel. Nor should any other parenting book out there. For what it's worth, this book references way more decent studies than do most parenting books.
How did the narrator detract from the book?
Po Bronson is clearly dedicated to the material he is presenting, but I think he did this book a disservice by not hiring a professional reader. His cadence is off-putting, and I swear that it sounds like he is baby-talking the listener half the time. Had I not been really, really interested in the content, I would not have finished listening to this. I would strongly recommend reading this book, not listening to it.
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- Grams
- 05-06-12
Why didn't I have this book sooner?
Parenthood carries a load of guilt--for all the things we did wrong--and this book doesn't help. But I loved it anyway. I bought it for 4 of my friends immediately. It is non-fiction, but a page-turner all the same.
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- Tom
- 02-01-10
Very different look at parenting
i enjoyed the different perspective on parenting
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- Anne
- 04-23-11
Fascinating and Highly Recommended
If you are a parent, I recommend this book very highly. The section around sleep and it's connection to grades and depression was especially important. "Tools for the Mind" was a fascinating look at early childhood learning. This book has influenced my perspectives on parenting greatly. If you like Gladwell's books or the Freakonomics books, this will be right up your alley.
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