Paris for Gullible Tourists
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Narrated by:
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Kelly Rhodes
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By:
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Alun Hill
About this listen
Parody - don't buy if you don't understand humor, please!
Paris - the city of lights and dog shit.
Where the women don't shave their armpits, but they spend millions on perfume.
The most-visited city in the world. The best city for gullible tourists, then.
Learn the scams, learn the places to avoid.
Here's an example for the Eiffel Tower:
Known as the "awful tower" locally.
Locals often go to the top, as that's the only part of Paris where you can't see it.
Long queues.
The exorbitant admission price (designed only for gullible tourists) only gets you to the second floor.
The top is the third floor.
It's narrower up there, windy, crowded - and costs more to go up.
From the top however, you can see all of Paris, if it's a clear day (see weather).
For free, by not going up, you can also see Paris. Better and cheaper.
You were wondering how to get to the first floor?
You pay to go up in the elevator to the second floor, then walk down stairs.
Lots of stairs.
Lots.
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Story
Reunited in love after 35 years and suffering from a serious case of pre-retirement wanderlust, Lynne and Tim Martin made a life-altering decision: They sold their house and possessions and hit the road to live internationally full-time. Now tethered to nothing but their suitcases, each other, and their next exotic location, they've never looked back. From sky-high pyramids in Mexico to monkeys in Marrakech, this delightful, inspiring memoir is a romantic tale of derring-do for grown-ups and a road map for anyone who dreams of turning the idea of life abroad into a reality.
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She makes it sound SO unappealing!
- By Barbara on 05-18-14
By: Lynne Martin
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One Year Off
- Leaving It All Behind for a Round-the-World Journey with Our Children
- By: David Cohen
- Narrated by: Kevin Stillwell
- Length: 8 hrs and 59 mins
- Unabridged
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In One Year Off, you can join the family on a trek up a Costa Rican volcano, cruise the canals of Burgundy by houseboat, and ride ferries through the Greek Islands. Later, as the Cohens wander further off the tourist trail, you can drive through the villages of Rajasthan, traverse the vast Australian Nullarbor, and discover the charms of Cambodia's Angkor Wat and the hidden shangri-las of northern Laos.
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fun filled travellog
- By tarun on 07-22-19
By: David Cohen
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Not Afraid of the Fall
- 114 Days Through 38 Cities in 15 Countries
- By: Kyle James
- Narrated by: Aaron Landon
- Length: 10 hrs and 19 mins
- Unabridged
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After purchasing one-way flights from New York City to Paris, Kyle James and his girlfriend Ashley quit their day jobs, planned futures, and daily paradigms to see as much of the world as they could. In 114 days, they trekked across 15 countries and 38 cities with nothing but their backpacks, their smartphones, and each other. Not Afraid of the Fall is the unvarnished story of their off-the-cuff journey: from cliff-jumping off Croatia's untouched coasts to bathing with rescued elephants in Thailand and far beyond.
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Poorly written, and straight up boring
- By Jon on 06-08-18
By: Kyle James
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Made in Scotland
- My Grand Adventures in a Wee Country
- By: Billy Connolly
- Narrated by: Gordon Kennedy
- Length: 6 hrs and 17 mins
- Unabridged
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Billy Connolly may be a citizen of the world, but in his heart he's never been far from his homeland. Made in Scotland is Billy's unique and intimate portrait of his native Scotland, a love letter to the places and people that made him. It's an adventure inspired by a single incident: the moment Billy received his Knighthood and was asked, 'How does it feel to have achieved all this when you came from nothing?' His response was, 'But I did come from something!'
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I can't believe I wasted a credit on this blather.
- By J. M. Popa on 01-23-20
By: Billy Connolly
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A Newfoundlander in Canada
- Always Going Somewhere, Always Coming Home
- By: Alan Doyle
- Narrated by: Alan Doyle
- Length: 6 hrs and 40 mins
- Unabridged
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Often in a van, sometimes in a bus, occasionally in a car with broken wipers "using Bob's belt and a rope found by Paddy's Pond" to pull them back and forth, Alan and his bandmates charted new territory, and he constantly measured what he saw of the vast country against what his forefathers once called the Daemon Canada. In a period punctuated by triumphant leaps forward for the band, deflating steps backward, and everything in between.
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A Newfoundlander
- By Deedra on 12-28-17
By: Alan Doyle
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Best. State. Ever.
- A Florida Man Defends His Homeland
- By: Dave Barry
- Narrated by: Dick Hill
- Length: 4 hrs and 47 mins
- Unabridged
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We never know what will happen next in Florida. We know only that, any minute now, something will. Every few months, Dave Barry gets a call from some media person wanting to know, "What the hell is wrong with Florida?" Somehow, the state's acquired an image as a subtropical festival of stupid, and as a loyal Floridian, Dave begs to differ. Sure, there was the 2000 election. And people seem to take their pants off for no good reason. And it has flying insects the size of LeBron James. But it is a great state, and Dave is going to tell you why.
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Most. Annoying. Narration. Ever.
- By Triple A on 06-21-17
By: Dave Barry
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A Russian Journal
- By: John Steinbeck
- Narrated by: Richard Poe
- Length: 7 hrs and 1 min
- Unabridged
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Steinbeck and Capa's account of their journey through Cold War Russia is a classic piece of reportage and travel writing.Just after the Iron Curtain fell on Eastern Europe, Pulitzer Prize-winning author John Steinbeck and acclaimed war photographer Robert Capa ventured into the Soviet Union to report for the New York Herald Tribune.
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Extremely Interesting
- By Jean on 12-04-14
By: John Steinbeck
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Travels in Siberia
- By: Ian Frazier
- Narrated by: Ian Frazier
- Length: 20 hrs and 26 mins
- Unabridged
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Ian Frazier trains his eye for unforgettable detail on Siberia, that vast expanse of Asiatic Russia. He explores many aspects of this storied, often grim region. He writes about the geography, the resources, the native peoples, the history, the 40-below midwinter afternoons, the bugs. The book brims with Mongols, half-crazed Orthodox archpriests, fur seekers, ambassadors of the czar bound for Peking, tea caravans, German scientists, American prospectors, intrepid English nurses, and prisoners and exiles of every kind....
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I Loved This Book
- By Sara on 01-05-14
By: Ian Frazier
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Roadshow
- Landscape with Drums: A Concert Tour by Motorcycle
- By: Neil Peart
- Narrated by: Brian Sutherland
- Length: 15 hrs and 46 mins
- Unabridged
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For 30 years, drummer, author, and songwriter Neil Peart had wanted to write a book about "the biggest journey of all in my restless existence: the life of a touring musician." Finally, the right time, and the right tour. In the summer of 2004, after three decades, 20 gold albums, and thousands of performances, the band Rush embarked on a 30th Anniversary World Tour. The "R30" tour traveled to nine countries, where the band performed 57 shows for more than half a million fans. Uniquely, Peart chose to do his between-show traveling by motorcycle, riding 21,000 miles of back roads.
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Enjoyable, even for a non-fan of Rush
- By Jim In Texas! on 10-04-14
By: Neil Peart
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Road Dog
- Life and Reflections from the Road as a Stand-up Comic
- By: Dov Davidoff
- Narrated by: Dov Davidoff
- Length: 5 hrs and 31 mins
- Unabridged
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Road Dog is comedian, actor, and writer, Dov Davidoff's unflinching memoir told through reflections of twelve months on the road. Davidoff travels across the country from college campuses to local theaters doing stand-up comedy and telling it like it is. He's been known to wax poetic about everything from encounters with large fake breasts, to people who have too many kids, to magnum condoms the size of CD cases. He is hilarious and relatable and will have you laughing at yourself in no time.
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dark, real, & exceptional
- By Luis F Rodriguez on 11-22-17
By: Dov Davidoff
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Surviving Ireland
- By: Colm Tobin
- Narrated by: Colm Tobin
- Length: 4 hrs and 53 mins
- Unabridged
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It's exhausting being Irish. The constant self-flagellation is enough to put anybody off their breakfast. Why are we so hard on ourselves? Is it the postcolonial overhang following centuries of oppression at the hands of a litany of foreign invaders? Or is it collective guilt for sending Westlife out into the wider world? In Surviving Ireland, acclaimed comedy writer Colm Tobin takes the listener by the hand for a satirical romp through modern Irish life.
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very fun
- By Rick on 06-12-19
By: Colm Tobin
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Schadenfreude, a Love Story
- Me, the Germans, and 20 Years of Attempted Transformations, Unfortunate Miscommunications, and Humiliating Situations That Only They Have Words For
- By: Rebecca Schuman
- Narrated by: Christa Lewis
- Length: 8 hrs and 57 mins
- Unabridged
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Schadenfreude is the story of a teenage Jewish intellectual who falls in love - in love with a boy (who breaks her heart), a language (that's nearly impossible to master), a culture (that's nihilistic but punctual), and a landscape (that's breathtaking when there's not a wall in the way). Rebecca is an everyday, misunderstood '90s teenager with a passion for Pearl Jam and Ethan Hawke circa Reality Bites until two men walk into her high school civics class: Dylan Gellner and Franz Kafka, hitching a ride in Dylan's backpack.
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A humorous, delectable read
- By Amazon Customer on 07-13-17
By: Rebecca Schuman
What listeners say about Paris for Gullible Tourists
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Schopper
- 03-06-19
Approximately 9 minutes of sarcastic info.
This could’ve been a decent little bit of information, but it is so short it is not worth the time. I didn’t mind the sarcasm as it started, I mean I wanted to hear all the ways tourists are taken advantage of, that’s why I bought it. As I drive to work, which is a ten minute drive, it played the whole thing! It is so short that my third grades could have written this.
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