Virtual Voice Sample

Access a growing selection of included Audible Originals, audiobooks, and podcasts.
You will get an email reminder before your trial ends.
Audible Plus auto-renews for $7.95/mo after 30 days. Upgrade or cancel anytime.

Still a Nice Guy

By: Phil Torcivia
Narrated by: Virtual Voice
Try for $0.00

$7.95 a month after 30 days. Cancel anytime.

Buy for $3.99

Buy for $3.99

Pay using card ending in
By confirming your purchase, you agree to Audible's Conditions of Use and Amazon's Privacy Notice. Taxes where applicable.

Publisher's summary

Preparing My "F*ck It" List

Is it any wonder that I’m still single? Will there ever come an evening where I’ll quietly sip fine wine, watch Sportscenter, and engage in casual conversation with bartenders and patrons without leaving with writing material? Fortunately, that’s unlikely. I enjoy the freedom that comes with single life, even as I approach fifty. I frequently hear, “Don’t you want to have someone to grow old with?” That’s not high on my bucket list. Like any honest male, I seek and desire fine wine, espresso, and sex—in any order, thank you very much. I don’t fantasize about holding hands with the love of my life in a resting home while I drool on myself, waiting to die. I do fantasize about waking up next to a sexually exhausted female specimen that can stimulate me physically and mentally, even after she leaves. “Don’t you want to get married again, Phil?” Similar to teenage acne, I think I can do without an encore. “What about children? Don’t you want to pass on your genes?” I’d rather slip off your jeans. “Don’t you get lonely?” No, and the last time I checked, I had almost 150 million reasons why in this country alone. “Don’t you want to have regular, dependable, and safe sex?” To me, that sounds like the exact opposite of marriage. Hence, I remain content in my sun-drenched confines with my two silly felines and hangovers designed with red wine. Please keep up the wackiness, San Diego. I’m proud to be a huge fan of your dysfunctions and one of your major contributors.

This title uses virtual voice narration

Virtual voice is computer-generated narration for audiobooks.
activate_Holiday_promo_in_buybox_DT_T2

What listeners say about Still a Nice Guy

Average customer ratings

Reviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.