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The King of Average
- Narrated by: Gary Schwartz
- Length: 5 hrs and 49 mins
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Publisher's summary
Named one of Kirkus Reviews best books of 2016, Gary Schwartz's heartfelt, hilarious, pun-filled middle grade novel tells of an 11-year old's quest for love and self-acceptance in a land where psychological states are actual places.
James isn't the world's greatest kid, but he's not the worst, either: he's average!
When he decides to become the most average kid who ever lived, James is transported to another world where he meets Mayor Culpa, a well-dressed talking Scapegoat who recruits him to become the new King of Average. He is joined on his quest by a professional Optimist and his grouchy companion, an equally professional Pessimist. Together, they set out on a journey of self-discovery that leads them all the way from the Sea of Doubt to Mount Impossible, the highest peak in the Unattainable Mountains. There, James stumbles into a Shangri-La called Epiphany, he uncovers the secret of who he really is. Follow James on his hilarious, adventure-packed journey to find self-worth in this heartfelt middle grade novel by debut author Gary Schwartz.
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A plucky farm boy will find more than he's bargained for on his quest to awaken the sleeping princess in her cursed tower. First there's the Dark Lord, who wishes for the boy's untimely death...and also very fine cheese. Then there's a bard without a song in her heart but with a very adorable and fuzzy tail, an assassin who fears not the night but is terrified of chickens, and a mighty fighter more frightened of her sword than of her chain-mail bikini. This journey will lead to sinister umlauts, a trash-talking goat, and the Dread Necromancer Steve....
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Disappointing
- By Bruce D. Parker on 07-18-18
By: Kevin Hearne, and others
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The Dragons of Chiril
- A Novel
- By: Donita K. Paul
- Narrated by: Tanya Eby
- Length: 12 hrs and 8 mins
- Unabridged
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Tipper has been caring for her family’s estate for years now, ever since her father disappeared, making a living by selling off his famous artwork. Then she learns that three statues she sold were carved from an ancient foundation stone, and the fabric of her reality is crumbling. She must free her father and save the world. But she can’t do it alone....
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Wish they would keep the same narrator
- By Amanda Bagley on 12-11-20
By: Donita K. Paul
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Second Star to the Right
- By: Mary Alice Monroe
- Narrated by: Mary Alice Monroe
- Length: 11 hrs and 54 mins
- Unabridged
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Practical, smart, and desperate to escape a shadowy past, Faye takes a job at a top advertising firm in London where she hopes she and her children can find a fresh start. When she finds the beautiful two-story flat for rent in a stately old Victorian complete with a neglected but tumbling English garden, she can scarcely believe her good fortune. But it isn't long before Faye realizes not everything in the old home may be as peaceful as it seems.
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what a beautiful love story! it's a must read.
- By Amazon Customer on 04-03-15
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Bestiary - The Complete Trilogy
- A Slice of Life Adventure
- By: Kirk Mason
- Narrated by: Tom North, Faye Bishop
- Length: 26 hrs and 41 mins
- Unabridged
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One minute I’m in a tree, pointing my camera at a tiger, the next I’m on my back in a medieval fantasy world, while a skittish blonde hovers over me, hoping I’m not dead. I’ve never felt more alive.
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I couldn't stand the asshole main character
- By Brett R. Green on 01-02-23
By: Kirk Mason
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DragonSpell
- DragonKeeper Chronicles, Book 1
- By: Donita K. Paul
- Narrated by: Ellen Grafton
- Length: 11 hrs and 11 mins
- Unabridged
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Once a slave girl in the village of River Away, Kale is freed when she discovers a dragon's egg. She is given the unexpected opportunity to journey to the great walled city of Vendala to become a servant to Paladin. Yet this young girl has much to learn about the difference between slavery and service.
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I'm Enthralled by Donita K. Paul & Audible Books!
- By Sharri Lorraine on 09-21-11
By: Donita K. Paul
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Oz Reimagined
- New Tales from the Emerald City and Beyond
- By: Douglas Cohen - editor, John Joseph Adams - editor
- Narrated by: Nick Podehl, Tanya Eby
- Length: 10 hrs and 30 mins
- Unabridged
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When L. Frank Baum introduced Dorothy and friends to the American public in 1900, The Wonderful Wizard of Oz became an instant, best-selling hit. Today the whimsical tale remains a cultural phenomenon that continues to spawn wildly popular books, movies, and musicals. Now, editors John Joseph Adams and Douglas Cohen have brought together leading fantasy writers such as Orson Scott Card and Jane Yolen to create the ultimate anthology for Oz fans.
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The Many Faces of Dorothy or Dot
- By Jim "The Impatient" on 07-19-14
By: Douglas Cohen - editor, and others
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The Hum and the Shiver
- The Tufa Novels, Book 1
- By: Alex Bledsoe
- Narrated by: Emily Janice Card, Stefan Rudnicki
- Length: 9 hrs and 43 mins
- Unabridged
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No one knows where the Tufa came from or how they ended up in the mountains of east Tennessee. When the first Europeans came to the Smoky Mountains, the Tufa were already there. Dark-haired and enigmatic, they live quietly in the hills and valleys of Cloud County, their origins lost to history. But there are clues in their music, hidden in the songs they have passed down for generations.
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Excellent story that combines music and folklore
- By T. L. Walker on 10-01-15
By: Alex Bledsoe
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Jeremy Thatcher, Dragon Hatcher
- By: Bruce Coville
- Narrated by: Bruce Coville
- Length: 2 hrs and 35 mins
- Unabridged
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If Howard Morton and Freddie the Frog Killer were trying to hold you down so that Mary Lou Hutton could kiss you, you might run as fast as Jeremy Thatcher did the day he stumbled into Mr. Elives' Magic Shop. And if you stumbled into that strange shop, you, too, might be asked to make a choice. What would you buy? The Chinese rings? The Skull of Truth? Or the dragon's egg?
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love this book as a kid
- By Jamie wool on 11-16-17
By: Bruce Coville
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Flunked
- By: Jen Calonita
- Narrated by: Kristin Condon
- Length: 5 hrs and 17 mins
- Unabridged
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Gilly wouldn't call herself wicked, exactly... but when you have five little brothers and sisters and live in a run-down boot, you have to get creative to make ends meet. Gilly's a pretty good thief (if she does say so herself). Until she gets caught.
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Fun fairytale retelling
- By Kira on 10-30-15
By: Jen Calonita
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The Gorgon Bride
- By: Galen Surlak-Ramsey
- Narrated by: Natasha Soudek
- Length: 10 hrs and 7 mins
- Unabridged
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Alexander Weiss inadvertently insults Athena, goddess of wisdom, and she casts him away on a forgotten isle filled with statues. Being marooned is bad enough, but the fact that the island is also the home of Euryale, elder sister to Medusa, makes the situation a touch worse. The only thing keeping Alex from being petrified is the fact that Euryale has taken a liking to the blundering mortal. For now.
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This book is AWESOME... MORE please!!!
- By Annie Armstrong on 11-02-18
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Christopher Robin
- The Novelization
- By: Disney Press, Elizabeth Rudnick
- Narrated by: Steven Crossley
- Length: 5 hrs and 27 mins
- Unabridged
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Once upon a time, there was a boy named Christopher Robin, who had many friends in the Hundred Acre Wood. As time passed, the boy grew up, and he lost track of his friends. Then one day, a silly old bear with a love for honey decided to leave the wood and go looking for his friend Christopher Robin. From the streets of London to the grassy banks of the Hundred Acre Wood, Winnie the Pooh and Christopher Robin will journey to find each other and remember the magical elements of friendship and play.
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Excellent narration
- By M. S. Swing on 12-28-18
By: Disney Press, and others
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Another Fine Myth
- Myth Adventures, Book 1
- By: Robert Asprin
- Narrated by: Noah Michael Levine
- Length: 5 hrs and 47 mins
- Unabridged
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Skeeve is a magician’s apprentice (and a wanna-be thief) until an assassin’s bolt kills his master, Garkin. Along with Aahz, the green-scaled, purple-tongued demon and master magician summoned by Garkin, he sets out on a quest to get even. The road to vengeance is bound to prove rocky, however, because Skeeve can barely light a candle with his beginning magic, and Aahz has lost his own considerable magical abilities as a consequence of Garkin’s summoning spell.
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Funnier in print
- By Kimberly Mason on 07-09-22
By: Robert Asprin
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The Sword-Edged Blonde
- By: Alex Bledsoe
- Narrated by: Stefan Rudnicki
- Length: 8 hrs and 28 mins
- Unabridged
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It should have been a case like any other: a missing princess, a king willing to pay in gold for her return. But before he realizes it, private investigator Eddie LaCrosse, a slightly shopworn sword jockey with a talent for discretion and detection, is swept up in a web of mystery and deceit involving a brutally murdered royal heir, a queen accused of an unspeakable crime, and the tragic past he thought he'd left behind.
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No Redeeming Qualities
- By MightyMite68 on 09-27-20
By: Alex Bledsoe
What listeners say about The King of Average
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Mary Karowski
- 05-11-17
Reminds me of labrynth
Great average story. Many memorable characters that will remind
You of the labrynth, Alice in wonderland, etc. a great way to teach kids about emotions, states of mind, types of behaviors etc. a very fun and imaginative story for any and all ages. Really loved it. I was voluntarily provided this free review copy audiobook by the author, narrator, or publisher.
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- Deborah
- 04-28-17
Good listen
This book and the narration were excellent. It was a Wizard of OZ type story with talking animals and odd characters. At first I thought that maybe my young teen grandson would enjoy it but I believe that he wouldn't catch all the play on words that is a big part of the books world. I think it will be best appreciated by adults or very bright, well read youngsters.
I was voluntarily provided this free review copy audiobook by the author, narrator, or publisher.
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- Rhonda
- 04-26-17
Very clever way to present the information here!
If you could sum up The King of Average in three words, what would they be?
Clever, funny and thought-provoking
What did you like best about this story?
It took me a little bit to get into this book but the more I listened, the more I liked it
Did you have an extreme reaction to this book? Did it make you laugh or cry?
No extreme reaction but it did make me think, laugh a little and sometimes even shake my head at some of the characters.
Any additional comments?
I love psychology so I found this book to be wonderful. It was written in a way that teaches about behaviors and personalities but also makes it fun to listen to. Not only is this a well written book but his narration is excellent. I would recommend this book to anyone who is considering it as I am very happy I was given the opportunity to listen to it. I was voluntarily provided this free review copy audiobook by the author, narrator, or publisher.
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- Fox
- 04-06-17
I adored this book!
Would you recommend this audiobook to a friend? If so, why?
I can’t praise this book enough. It is a sweet and witty middle grade novel, that both kids and adults (hey, I am an adult!) would love, and I highly recommend you pick the audiobook version. Those six hours flew by very quickly.
What was one of the most memorable moments of The King of Average?
Imaginary world and word play for both the places and the names of characters. Loveable characters and curious adventures - what more can you ask for!
Which scene was your favorite?
When Monsieur Roget was introduced. He is my favourite!
If you were to make a film of this book, what would the tag line be?
The Realm of Possibilities for the most average kid ever!
Any additional comments?
I believe that any reader will be able to find a character they can relate to in this book. This audiobook brought up the long forgotten feeling of a childhood story well-told - something that I often find missing in contemporary middle grade fiction. I think that the fact that Gary is a professional voice actor, undoubtedly, adds to the story. His narration is so perfect, I kept forgetting that I was listening to one person doing all of those voices.
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- chris miller
- 05-15-17
Fun for kids and adults alike!
If you could sum up The King of Average in three words, what would they be?
Relatable, imaginative, fun
What about Gary Schwartz’s performance did you like?
Narrator's Voice sounded down to earth and was a really good fit
Did you have an extreme reaction to this book? Did it make you laugh or cry?
Laughed a lot, but struck a cord along the way with some real life issues, especially from a from an adolescent's perspective
Any additional comments?
This audiobook was given by the author, at no cost in exchange for an unbiased review via Audiobook Boom
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- Athena
- 06-04-17
Good kind of crazy
If you could sum up The King of Average in three words, what would they be?
Fun,interesting unique
Which scene was your favorite?
Not sure
Did you have an extreme reaction to this book? Did it make you laugh or cry?
it was funny and has a lot of things that interested me
Any additional comments?
I was given this free copy, in return for my unbiased review
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- TinkerMel
- 04-26-17
such a good book! good for all ages!
This book was awesome. It's extremely whimsical.
This is the first time i've heard a book from this writer, and I loved it. Its so imaginative and so very creative. I fell in love with all of the characters. I think everyone of all ages would enjoy this book.
The narration was spot on, he did an excellent job
I do recommend this book.
I was voluntarily provided this free review copy audiobook by the author, narrator, or publisher.
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- cutelilinikika
- 05-11-17
Clever and imaginative middle grade story
Would you listen to The King of Average again? Why?
I would probably listen to this again with my nieces and nephews, who would probably enjoy it. It is well performed and the ideas are very clever. It would be fun to hear their thoughts and discuss the story with someone in the target audience, to see how it comes across to them.
What about Gary Schwartz’s performance did you like?
I really enjoyed the various voices used for the characters. Sometimes in audio this can either be over the top or lacking, but here I think it was just about right. There were some characters with very distinct voices (because of accents) and they were handled really well.
Any additional comments?
This was a really fun and clever story. The ending was a bit abrupt, but overall it was really enjoyable. It was nice to see Jame confront some of his demons and how he was able to handle them. There were some difficult lessons to be learned through the story. *An audio copy of this was provided upon request. All opinions expressed in this review are my own.*
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Overall
- La La in the Library
- 08-01-18
If this had not been a review book I would hsve DNFed.
This book was so ridiculous at first I thought it was an Adult Fiction parody mash-up of Baum, Lewis, and Jeff Kinney; but it is not. The writing is poor and the content will be of very little interest to Middle Grade aged readers, if at all.
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