When Will Jesus Bring the Pork Chops? Audiobook By George Carlin cover art

When Will Jesus Bring the Pork Chops?

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When Will Jesus Bring the Pork Chops?

By: George Carlin
Narrated by: George Carlin
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Following his two New York Times best sellers, Brain Droppings and Napalm & Silly Putty, comes George Carlin's third audiobook, When Will Jesus Bring the Pork Chops?, a riotous journey through the mind of one of America's premiere comic observers.

Ranging from his absurdist side (Message from a Cockroach; TV News: The Death of Humpty Dumpty; Tips for Serial Killers) to his unerring ear for American speech (Politician Talk; Societal Cliches; 13 Sections of Euphemisms) to his unsparing views on America and its values (War, God, Stuff Like That; Zero Tolerance; Tired of the Handi-crap), Carlin's legendary irreverence and iconoclasm are on full display as he vainly scours the American landscape for signs of intelligence.

He also has a silly side:

  • You know what kind of guy you never see anymore? A fop.
  • A good motto to live by: "Always try not to get killed."
  • I've never seen a homeless guy with a bottle of Gatorade.
  • A lot of gay men stay in the closet because they're interested in fashion.
  • I have an impersonal trainer. We meet at the gym, we don't talk, he works out alone, and I go home.
  • Here's something you can't do by yourself: practice shaking hands.
  • When it comes to God's existence, I'm not an atheist and I'm not an agnostic. I'm an acrostic. The whole thing puzzles me.
  • Good news for senior citizens: Death is near!
  • O.J. Simpson has already received the ultimate punishment: For the rest of his life he has to associate with golfers.
    • ©2004 Comedy Concepts, Inc. (P)2004 Hyperion     Entertainment & Celebrities Literary History & Criticism Literature & Fiction Satire United States World Literature Comedy Funny Witty Celebrity War

    Critic reviews

    • Audie Award Finalist, Humor, 2005
    • 2005 Quill Award Nominee
    • Grammy Award Nominee, Best Spoken Word Album, 2005

    "There's no better way to enjoy one of Carlin's books than to hear him read it himself....Carlin has his comic timing down pat. His energetic reading is punctuated by conversational bits and enhanced by his deft vocal variation, making listeners feel as if they've got a front-row seat at one of his comedy shows." (Publishers Weekly)

    All stars
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    deviously funny...George Carlin has a style all his own...I loved his performances, and his books...

    One of the Greatest!

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    George Carlin is one of my heroes. This is mostly about politically correct speech and euphemisms. But it's not funny unless you realize that Carlin has complete contempt for the publisher, the listener, and society at large. It's a big middle finger to whoever insisted he was contracted to write a book. And that's why I love it. By no means Carlin's best, in fact it's kind of over-the-top unfunny. But my theory is that that was his intention. So, keeping that in mind (and I concede I could be wrong), you'll enjoy it more.

    Here's the thing....

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    Carlin at his best, but if you already have "George Carlin Reads To You" you've already heard all the best bits. If you are trying to choose between the two, get this one, but if you have one, you don't need the other.

    Excellent, But Derivitive Of Earlier Works

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    Would you listen to When Will Jesus Bring the Pork Chops? again? Why?

    No, he said it all the first read.

    Who was your favorite character and why?

    George, of course.

    Have you listened to any of George Carlin’s other performances before? How does this one compare?

    Yes. It's as entertaining and thought provoking as all of his work is.

    Was there a moment in the book that particularly moved you?

    Several.

    George at his best

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    You will get exactly what your looking for, if your looking for George Carlin.

    What do you want me to say? Its George Carlin.

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    There are parts of this book that are just hysterical, and other parts that are, quite frankly, a little disturbing. But that's George Carlin. I enjoyed it, but I think I've gotten my fill of him for a while.

    Vintage Carlin

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    Fortunately Mr. Carlin is not running for President, as his perspective is way out of the "mainstream". His cynacism and his almost God-less agnosticism combined with a carefully delivered, gratuitous raunch, can be a challenge to the most open minded of God fearing folks. However, brandishing a super-sharp intellect, and a subtle but real concern for the well being of humanity, George presents insightful alternative points of view, the consideration of which is immensely rewarded with continuous, uncontrolled bouts of liberating laughter.

    Build Your IQ While Laughing

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    this is a book I shoudl have bought and left on my toilet for guests, not to listen to. Though it is cool to hear Carlin read it.

    clips

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    Gotta love George's irreverent look at life. I love his command of the language and how he uses it to demonstrate the woosification of America.

    Typical Carlin

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    It's good we have his books in his voice despite him being gone. I love that some of his best material from his stand up is in here as well as other things I've never heard. If you need a laugh as well as some food for thought, you could do better than George Carlin.

    A Man Sorely Missed

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