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Gay dating can be messy. From hookup culture and emotional avoidance to Grindr’s racial hierarchy, we’re diving into the chaos with guests Darynel Weekly and Mango Lassi. We’re unpacking the trauma, the body standards, the “no fats no femmes,” and giving you tools to heal, find real connection, and maybe even enjoy the apps without losing your soul.

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00:00 Intro
00:02:57 First time with a man
00:07:46 History of hookup culture
00:12:11 DL gays
00:19:57 Seeking validation in sex
00:28:21 Finding long term love
00:36:10 Is the gay community racist?
00:48:48 fetishization in gay community
00:54:46 Is it a personal preference?
01:04:22 Gay body standards
01:07:28 Best advice for dating

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Think all lesbians are women? Think again. We're queering the label with trans and non-binary lesbians who are redefining what it means to love, resist, and rebel. From gender euphoria to TERF drama to navigating dating apps as a gender outlaw, this episode dives into the messy, sexy, revolutionary legacy of lesbianism. Featuring archival hot takes, community tension, and maybe even a little dyke drama.

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00:00:00 intro
00:02:34 What is a lesbian?
00:10:18 Being NB and Trans
00:16:29 Finding Gender Identity
00:25:58 Why identify as a lesbian?
00:31:41 What is a woman?
00:37:12 Queer phenomenology
00:51:29 Gender identity vs survival strategy
01:01:41 Who gets to be a lesbian?
01:18:48 Lesbian sentiment towards trans & NB
01:26:28 Dating and intimacy
01:37:36 Envy vs attraction to women
01:41:08 Advice for dating

If you've ever been called “exotic,” or told you're one of the “good minorities” this one’s for you. We’re unpacking the fetishization of Asian bodies, the myth of the model minority, and the tension between queerness and cultural belonging. With personal stories from two badass artists, Charlotte and Ky, we explore femme fetish tropes, family pressure, and the art of de-centering whiteness, while staying hot and radical.

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You were told sex is binary, XX or XY, case closed. But what if we told you that’s just redhead math? We’re unpacking the intersex experience with two brilliant guests: Noise (the intersex karaoke witch) and Bailey (trans, intersex, and hot). We’re diving into the science, the history, the surgeries, the shame and why “normal” is a scam. Expect gay giggles, medical rage, and radical joy.

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00:00 intro
03:10 Finding out you're intersex
17:05 History of medicalization of intersex
26:41 Experiencing diagnosis
33:39 Existing in a binary world
41:24 Navigating dating
51:03 Advice for younger self

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Queer. Muslim. Rockstar. Activist. Urvah Khan is all of the above, and she’s here to spill the tea on holding identities the world says don’t mix. We’re talking queerness, faith, feminism, and the fight for liberation, plus why the West needs to stop acting like all Muslim women are oppressed. Urvah breaks down her personal journey, the power of community, and how she’s reclaiming the Azaan with a mic in one hand and a middle finger in the other. It’s raw, rebellious, and deeply queer. Let’s get into it.

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00:00 intro
01:58 Queer and raised Muslim
12:12 Coming out to a Muslim family
19:17 Coming back to Islam as a queer person
28:16 Why continue to choose Islam?
35:30 Wearing the hijab
39:39 Finding queer Muslim community
45:39 Advice for queer Muslims
47:31 Queer Muslim joy

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Losing your sapphic v-card? Terrified you’ll fumble the bag? We got you. This episode is your survival guide to sapphic sex, confidence, flirting, and ahem hands-on skills included. We’re joined by queer sex-ed pro Eva Bloom and sapphic dating expert Zhané to break down the do’s and don’ts of queer intimacy. From navigating your first time to mastering the art of the flirt, this one’s packed with hot tips (literally). Plus, we wrap things up with a round of Sapphic Smutty Mad Libs because education should always come with a little filth.

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00:00 intro
01:48 first time with a woman
14:54 ways to confirm your queerness
16:21 being a newbie means no one wants you?
18:21 Queer vs straight flirting
22:49 Sapphic vs straight sex
30:27 how to flirt with Sapphics
38:54 having Sapphic sex
47:59 Strapping advice
55:35 Top or bottom?
58:40 Trans femmes & neurodivergents
59:58 Sexy Sapphic Smutt

So, you wanna open up your relationship but don’t wanna crash and burn in a fiery mess of jealousy and regret? We got you. We’re joined by three queer, non-monogamous therapists from the Polyamory Therapy Collective to give you the ultimate survival guide to ENM—how to start the convo, avoid rookie mistakes, and actually enjoy the ride. We’re unpacking couples’ privilege, imposter syndrome, and why your gut is doing backflips every time your partner even mentions someone new. Whether you're non-monogamy-curious or in the trenches, this one's essential.

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00:00 Intro
02:11 What are open relationships?
07:24 Is ENM for you?
11:29 Is it ethical?
16:08 How to ask your partner to open up
23:57 What to discuss before opening up
29:38 What if it doesn't feel good for you?
33:13 Dealing with imposter syndrome
41:49 Is ENM NOT for you?
43:00 Don't make these mistakes
46:53 How to forgive those who hurt you
50:17 Couple's privilege
56:00 Staying in touch with an ex
01:01:16 If you feel distant from this conversation

What does it really mean to be a lesbian? Is it a vibe? A gender? A political stance? We’re diving headfirst into the evolution of lesbian identity—breaking down butch and femme history, masculinity, queerness, and what it truly means to de-center men (spoiler: it’s liberating). With three wildly different lesbians at the table - Haviah, Pkat, and Karbon - we’re serving history, academic drama, and personal hot takes. It’s intellectual, it’s unhinged, and it’s very, very gay. Buckle up, baby dykes.

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Email: queer.collective.to@gmail.com

00:00 intro
05:18 the lesbian identity
12:17 the masculine/feminine dilemma
24:52 discovery of lesbianism
38:02 the lesbian sub-identities
50:48 white vs bipoc lesbians
01:05:46 is lesbian a queer identity?
01:13:37 femmes don't get enough credit
01:25:11 do mascs get more dates?