Showing results by author "John Rushton" in All Categories

Life Bite Series. Happiness is something that we all have within us, it is nowhere else in life. Despite endless books and CD's and such like happiness is well within our control, farming it out or outsourcing it is a stupid thing to do. Thinking that "out there" someone has the key to happiness is like admitting you are already brain dead. Life may not be swimmingly fabulous every day but that doesn't negate the fact that you have to be unhappy either, unless of course you choose to do so.

Life Bite Series. Bereavement is going to hit us all at some point in our lives. It is the one inevtiable thing that's guaranteed. How we think of death is partly due to our religion and the stilted morbid way that we have been taught about it. Yet if you believe in God then death is not that bad. If "love" was in the equation then it still existes even after death (escept in Islam where love is purely conditional).

Forgiveness is essential if we are not to burden our minds with events that have passed. It is not always easy but it is essential. Gandhi said "The weak can never forgive it only comes from the strong," and it is so true. The ignorant, those who worship evil religions, and the stupid can never ever forgive as to them it's a lack of face so they harbour hatred and evil and carry it around with them as a moribund justification. Hence they are great failures in life as they can't move on. Anger within hurts yourself more than anything, it's like drinking poison and expecting others to die, it never works.

It is imperative to keep happy, otherwise you lose the point to your whole existence. It may not be easy and no one presents that it is, after all we are all human beings with emotions that can sway us to and fro just by hearing about circumstances. We do however have a great deal of control in our lives and can override our immediate feelings to say to ourselves: "I can't control the events around me, but I can control how I feel," and thus do just that. Making life a better place from within has a habit of changing events around us and also the attitude of those around us, too.

We all get let down from time to time. Sometimes it is inevitable because of circumstances; other times it is because it is a deliberate action. Either way it is not very nice, although it is even worse when someone lets you down for purely selfish reasons. How we react other than being disappointed is literally down to us. Our thoughts and feelings come from the selfsame place; happiness and sadness come from the same brain. We need to respect ourselves and seek only the positive areas of life. Dwelling on being let down will only hurt you more than necessary.

We end up physically a product of what we eat. Fat, unhealthy, sluggish if we eat too much, etc. Similarly if we feed our mind with negative rubbish that the media spew out then we will subliminally start to dwell on events and situations that are way out of our control and thus lose the directnss of our own focus. We need to have a clear perspective at all times and understand what life is about, otherwise we will fall into a habit of thinking that we are disadvantaged when we don't even try. Life is how we view it, nothing more, hence it can be many things to many people.

A concise look at who we are. We are a "product of ourselves" no other. Despite who we may follow or admire, what we might spire to, it is our decision to do so. so we have to take ownership of the end result. Blame Culture (another topic in the series) is not an option. Regardless of our upbringing we get to a stage where we think for ourselves, unless we choose not to, but that's still our decision. An interesting brief six minutes on who you are and how you can change it - if you want to!

Life Bite Series. You are a product of yourself. What you wear, how you speak, what you eat, what you do, etc., it's all a decision that you have taken and it outwardly shows too. Similarly, life is a product of your decisions and how you interact with the various parameters in life. What fits into your comfort zone or what you do to try things outside of it are still down to you. Your views on life play a considerable part in how you enjoy life (or not) and how you make friends (or not) and what you do in life; no one does this for you.

Our attitude defines us as people, our attitude denotes who we are and what we do and why. Our attitude speaks volumes about our character and how we think and view life and what we hold dear, in fact our attitude is everything. Our attitude is what others latch onto in us and similarly it's others' attitude that we latch onto to make an assessment of what they are like and can, indeed, we trust them in every respect. Those who are thick, stupid, ignorant, egotistical are those who get angry very quickly by because they just can't comprehend much else with their stunted mental growth.

We need to steer our course in life because if we don't then life will by default takes us where it is going, often to a place where we didn't want to be. Life doesn't hold any favourites nor does it take prisoners; it goes its own way regardless. What we do in life is down to us regardless of circumstances and conditions - those we can rarely control. What we can control even if we are somewhat timid in personality is how we think and what we do and how we react to everything.

Our relationship with ourselves (are we happy about who we are), others, and life is holistic; if it gets out of kilter then we become discordant and uneasy and then a whole manner of silly things happen which makes matters even worse. It's important that we understand this because any relationship, if it is to be sound, must have some firm foundations because nothing in life lives in isolation - everything has a part in something else.

We need to stand firm in life even if we are cajoled or bullied by loud and bombastic people or organizations that want you to do what they want for their purposes. Never ever be frightened to complain; do it in style as high as you can go and copy others in the correspondence so that everyone knows. Never ever be blackmailed by family, friends, or those who use "emotional blackmail" in trying to get their way above yours.

If we can't communicate we can't express our love, our upset, our thoughts, our feelings, our aspirations, our creativity, in fact if we don't express ourselves we are making ourselves redundant in life and falling very short of who we are. Yes, there are despots and dictators and evil religions that supress communications and the messages they deliver, but the irony of all of that is that they poach from the societies that allow communications because they haven't themelves the guts or brain power to effectively use it.

As a race of people the human race has survived because of its need to foster love and friendship among itself. Yes there have been wars and evil religious content because of negative people, brainwashing, and sheer lack of worldly aspects of endemic groups of people. By and large, however, people and communities exist because of a need to feel both needed and to need others, too. Both are different in approach but both stem from the self-same place within.

Love is the essential ingredient in life that makes it worth living, it seeps into every corner of our lives, and where love is - evil isn't. Where love has the upper hand devious and cruel existences can't survive.You can see that the societies that have "love" within them prosper and create whereas those that have conditional love have unjust and repressive societies that control and kill and are barbaric in nature. Love allows us to be happy, be comfortable, to prosper not only in wealth but the quality of our lives and our health. Love nurtures and cares and gives unlimited options to move forward without hindrance.

We should be comfortable with the choices we make for the right reasons. Granted not all choices offer a simple solution and degrees of compromise come into play unless you are a dictator or a despot. Assuming you are neither then there is a very wide range of choices you can make which can seriously affect your life to make it better or not so good.

Self-created barriers are those that we have created within our own mind - for whatever reason, then we start to work within them. Often such barriers have no real relationship with what needs to be done but sometimes they form a series of parameters that subliminally stops one from doing something or taking risks or not venturing forward, so it creates a pseudo "safe haven", which it is not at all. Our thoughts and perceptions are important to us as we view life from such ideological places and thus if they are wrong or incorrect we lose out, often big time.

People will view us, judge us, accept us, or reject us based upon our attitude. Our initial concerns come from seeing someone else's attitude, which gets modified down the line the more we know of them. But if we have one inital meeting we can be a success or a failure in an instant. Our attitude is part of our "Shop Window" so if it looks shoddy or unkempt then that's how others see you. Of course everything in situ whether you are at work or at play you dress appropriately, but your character still remains relatively constant so a great assessment needs to take into account all mitigating circumstances.

Love is one of the most complex yet simple aspects of our lives. We can't do without it. We don't have to analyse it nor deeply scrutinise it, either, it is an inherent feeling we have. Love gives us the feeling of knowing what is right and what is wrong and many of the so called "bad people" in life have either been badly betrayed or allowed evil and negative thoughts to overcome their inherent feelings. Everything in life is a choice, if we do bad it is because we have chosen to do so, it just doesn't happen.

It is important that we feel fulfilled in life. Being fulfilled is not the same as everything being okay. Being fulfilled is that feeling we have that has an overall purpose, whether it's making your business grow, doing voluntary work, being a mum or a dad, creating something, whatever it is to you that provides that overall purpose. It's different things to different people. Many of today's mental problems stem from a lack of purpose, when this happens we crave all sorts of things to fill that "void" within.