Acts of Desperation
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Narrated by:
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Lauren Coe
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By:
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Megan Nolan
About this listen
This "blistering anti-romance" (Catherine Lacey) paints a riveting, cathartic story about love addiction and what it does to us.
Wouldn’t I do anything to reverse my loss, the absence of him?
In the first scene of this provocative gut-punch of a novel, our unnamed narrator meets a magnetic writer named Ciaran and falls, against her better judgment, completely in his power. After a brief, all-consuming romance, he abruptly rejects her, sending her into a tailspin of jealous obsession and longing. If he ever comes back to her, she resolves to hang onto him and his love at all costs, even if it destroys her....
Part breathless confession, part lucid critique, Acts of Desperation renders a consciousness split between rebellion and submission, between escaping degradation and eroticizing it, between loving and being lovable. With unsettling, electric precision, Nolan dissects one of life’s most elusive mysteries: Why do we want what we want, and how do we want it?
Combining the intellectual excitement of Rachel Cusk with the emotional rawness of Elena Ferrante, Acts of Desperation interrogates the nature of desire, power, and toxic relationships, challenging us to reckon honestly with our own insatiability.
©2021 Megan Nolan (P)2021 Little, Brown & CompanyListeners also enjoyed...
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Critic reviews
“Megan Nolan is a huge literary talent, and her first novel, Acts of Desperation, is a love story like no other. The writing is intense and honest, with a rare access to real life, but it is also reflective and full of insights, and with this combination the novel manages to separate the idea of love and the experience of it, and take the reader to the place where it comes into being.”—KARL OVE KNAUSGAARD
“Megan Nolan writes with piercing vulnerability and precision. Her debut novel, Acts of Desperation is a blistering anti-romance about the seductive destruction of trying to find self-worth in the gaze of another.”—CATHERINE LACEY, author of PEW and THE ANSWERS
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When Rachel Meyer, a 30-something foodie from New York, agrees to move to Mumbai with her Indian-born husband, Dhruv, she knows some culture shock is inevitable. Blessed with a curious mind and an independent spirit, Rachel is determined to learn her way around the hot, noisy, seemingly infinite metropolis she now calls home. But the expat American’s sense of adventure is sorely tested when her mother-in-law, Swati, suddenly arrives from Kolkata - 1,000 miles away - alone, with an even more shocking announcement: She’s left her husband of more than 40 years and moving in with them.
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This could have been so good...
- By Amazon Customer on 09-01-20
By: Leah Franqui
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Who's That Girl?
- By: Mhairi McFarlane
- Narrated by: Cassie Bradley
- Length: 14 hrs and 1 min
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
An achingly funny story from the author of the best-selling You Had Me at Hello. When Edie is caught in a compromising position at her colleagues' wedding, all the blame falls on her - turns out that personal popularity in the office is not that different from your school days. Shamed online and ostracised by everyone she knows, Edie's forced to take an extended sabbatical - ghostwriting an autobiography for hot new acting talent, Elliot Owen. Easy, right? Wrong.
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Very frustrating heroine, disappointing ending
- By Jennie L. Stumm on 09-23-20
By: Mhairi McFarlane
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Kiss
- By: Jill Mansell
- Narrated by: Gabrielle Baker
- Length: 16 hrs and 1 min
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
When aspiring musician Izzy is knocked off her motorbike, she doesn't just lose her dignity - she loses both long-term boyfriends, her job, and her beautiful apartment. Gina, who caused the accident, has more important things to worry about: Her husband has just deserted her for his pregnant mistress. Why should she care about Izzy? Yet, somehow, Gina finds herself opening her home to Izzy and her spirited teenage daughter.
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The story went on and on and on…
- By Karen S on 07-30-23
By: Jill Mansell
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The Nine Lives of Rose Napolitano
- A Novel
- By: Donna Freitas
- Narrated by: Kristen Sieh
- Length: 9 hrs and 7 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Rose Napolitano is fighting with her husband, Luke, about prenatal vitamins. She promised she’d take them, but didn’t. He promised before they got married that he’d never want children, but now he’s changed his mind. Their marriage has come to rest on this one question: Can Rose find it in herself to become a mother? Rose is a successful professor and academic. She's never wanted to have a child. The fight ends, and with it their marriage.
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Amateurish and Frustrating Book
- By Nerd on 06-04-21
By: Donna Freitas
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Blind Bet
- By: Tracey Richardson
- Narrated by: Sophie Daniels
- Length: 9 hrs and 3 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Ellen Turcotte's messy divorce forces her to take a break from her life. She'll go back, after some rest and relaxation. When her best friend suggests a diversion, she's quickly smitten with the allure of cards and the intriguing stranger who never seems to lose a hand. Surely she can play with dangerous temptation, just this once. Courtney Langford's favorite date is with Lady Luck. Ever since she missed a connection and avoided a deadly plane crash, she always comes up aces. Cards, women . . . seduction is just another way to win. Why should the lovely Ellen be any different?
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Good book
- By Sab on 11-10-22
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The Stuff that Never Happened
- A Novel
- By: Maddie Dawson
- Narrated by: Teri Clark Linden
- Length: 11 hrs and 20 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Annabelle McKay knows she shouldn’t have any complaints. She’s been in a stable marriage that’s lasted almost three decades and has provided her with two wonderful children and thousands of family dinners around a sturdy oak table. Other wives envy the fact that Grant is not the type of man who would ever cheat on her or leave her for a younger woman. The trouble is Annabelle isn’t sure she wants to be married to Grant anymore. The trouble is she’s still in love with someone else.
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Don’t pass this one up.
- By Lauren on 03-10-20
By: Maddie Dawson
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The Other Side of the Door
- A Novel
- By: Nicci French
- Narrated by: Imogen Church
- Length: 11 hrs and 57 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
When Bonnie Graham arrives at her boyfriend’s apartment in London, she is horrified to discover a dead body in a pool of blood on the floor. But she doesn’t call the police. Bonnie hides the corpse and then carefully wipes away any evidence she was ever there. Bonnie is a music teacher who spent a long, hot summer in London rehearsing with a band to play at a friend’s wedding. It was supposed to be fun, but the band members find the complicated knots of their friendships - some old, some new - unraveling as the days themselves unwind.
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Pass
- By Jessica Tenorio on 04-29-21
By: Nicci French
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Might have been an ok read...
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For every woman who’s been told to be the good wife
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Ten-year-old Jas lives with her strictly religious parents and her siblings on a dairy farm where waste and frivolity are akin to sin. Despite the dreary routine of their days, Jas has a unique way of experiencing her world: her face soft like cheese under her mother’s hands; the texture of green warts, like capers, on migrating toads in the village; the sound of “blush words” that aren’t in the Bible. One icy morning, the disciplined rhythm of her family’s life is ruptured by a tragic accident, and Jas is convinced she is to blame.
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While on her daily walk with her dog in a secluded woods, a woman comes across a note, handwritten and carefully pinned to the ground by stones. "Her name was Magda. Nobody will ever know who killed her. It wasn't me. Here is her dead body." But there is no dead body. Our narrator is deeply shaken; she has no idea what to make of this. She is new to this area, alone after the death of her husband, and she knows no one. Becoming obsessed with solving this mystery, our narrator imagines who Magda was and how she met her fate.
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Omg get ON with it
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Twenty-four-year-old British painter Cleo has escaped from England to New York and is still finding her place in the sleepless city when, a few months before her student visa ends, she meets Frank. Twenty years older and a self-made success, Frank’s life is full of all the excesses Cleo’s lacks. He offers her the chance to be happy, the freedom to paint and the opportunity to apply for a green card. But their impulsive marriage irreversibly changes both their lives and the lives of those close to them, in ways they never could’ve predicted.
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Refreshing
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In Falls Landing, Florida—a place built of theme parks, swampy lakes, and scorched bougainvillea flowers—something sinister lurks in the deep. A gang of thirteen-year-old girls obsessively orbit around the local preacher's daughter, Sammy. She is mesmerizing, older, and in love with Eddie. But suddenly, Sammy goes missing. Where is she? Watching from a distance, they edge ever closer to discovering a dark secret about their fame-hungry town and the cruel cost of a ticket out. What they see will continue to haunt them for the rest of their lives.
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No idea what was happening at any time
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Luster
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Edie is stumbling her way through her 20s - sharing a subpar apartment in Bushwick, clocking in and out of her admin job, making a series of inappropriate sexual choices. She is also haltingly, fitfully giving heat and air to the art that simmers inside her. And then she meets Eric, a digital archivist with a family in New Jersey, including an autopsist wife who has agreed to an open marriage - with rules.
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Spellbinding
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My Year of Rest and Relaxation
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Overall
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Our narrator should be happy, shouldn't she? She's young, thin, pretty, a recent Columbia graduate; she works an easy job at a hip art gallery and lives in an apartment on the Upper East Side of Manhattan paid for, like the rest of her needs, by her inheritance. But there is a dark and vacuous hole in her heart, and it isn't just the loss of her parents, or the way her Wall Street boyfriend treats her, or her sadomasochistic relationship with her best friend, Reva. It's the year 2000 in a city aglitter with wealth and possibility; what could be so terribly wrong?
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I love it...
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What listeners say about Acts of Desperation
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Mia
- 05-07-22
Not what I expected
I was suggested this book based on my listening history. It was a poor suggestion by audible. Probably an interesting story if you’re looking for something about anxious attachment styles
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- Sharlotte
- 06-07-22
Eerily Relatable
I have lived this voice, not in sequence necessarily, but in totality. It is uncanny, intense, and the culmination of the most tragic and desperate vignettes of my long life.
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- A Lynn
- 12-29-21
Gorgeous, tragic
A sad yet rich portrait of what it looks like to be a young adult who is being taken advantage of while battling the world's larger forces — Nolan does an excellent job of taking us into her mind and what the thought patterns of a co-dependent, abusive relationship look like. I thoroughly enjoyed it, but if the subject matter makes you uncomfortable, you probably should look elsewhere.
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- Prescilla
- 07-11-23
Raw
A very raw and honest take on a toxic relationship, it was easy to appreciate.
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- Jessica
- 07-16-22
Raw & Real
I love this book & how relatable and honest the character is. The writing and narration was top tier. I look forward to more from this author
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- Suzanna
- 09-04-23
Pretty Good
This was a decent book, not great but not bad. It was well written but a bit morose. If you like happy endings and likable characters, this is not the book for you. Both of the main characters seemed to have personality disorders, mutually abusive and self-destructive in their own ways.
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- julia
- 11-26-21
very heartbreaking
This book was very very heartbreaking. The name of the narrator was never given, so it remains anonymous. The poor girl did anything to feel "loved" and to feel "validated". She went through so much bs and was still treated horribly by everyone. If you want to feel sad this book is the way to go.
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2 people found this helpful
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- Aharrington03
- 08-19-21
A Work of Art
I found myself saying "wow" out loud, in swooning sort of way, all throughout the story. It read like one long beautiful poem. Her mind felt incredibly familiar, real, and relatable. I went out to buy a bottle of wine after it finished, and cried about how amazing and terrible it all was. I loved it, I hated it, I will never forget it.
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3 people found this helpful
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- Kanissia
- 01-03-23
Real and Raw
This book had my attention and it explores dark themes! An extremely toxic relationship ending.
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1 person found this helpful
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- Dr Sophie Henshaw
- 05-01-21
Wonderful and tortured
This is a wonderful book about the profound exploration of a young woman's sexual and emotional experience with a cold, emotionally abusive and critical but handsome man, Ciaran. It's in the genre of My Dark Vanessa by Kate Elizabeth Russell, My Year of Rest and Relaxation by Ottessa Moshfegh and Elena Ferrante's Neapolitan Novels. I loved this so much because it has psychological depth and I'm bored by anything else (yes, I'm a psychologist).
There are those who will attempt this book and think it's too self absorbed - so stay away from this if the deep, rich, inner life of women doesn't interest you. Probably most men won't like this. But if you liked the other books I mentioned, you'll love this too, I'm sure.
Now I've just got to find more of equal quality!
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11 people found this helpful