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Dog Poems for Kids: Rhyming Books for Children
- Dog & Unicorn Jerks: 2 in 1 Compilation (Just Really Big Jerks Series)
- Narrated by: Chelsea Lee Rock
- Length: 20 mins
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Publisher's summary
You and your kids will laugh out loud at funny sound effects of these Jerk Unicorn Jokes, Jerk Dog Jokes, and these funny Dog Pee Jerk Jokes. That's twice the fun!
Dog and Unicorn lovers will laugh out loud at the jerkiness of their rainbow color striped and furry friends with these curious and humorous unicorn and dog poems and rhymes. In this hilarious Funny Poem Book for Kids compilation of tongue-twisting and rhyming poetry, Timmie watches dogs and unicorns while they think nobody watches them and unlocks the poet in him.
Powered by his creative potentia,l Timmie Guzzmann, the author of "Dogs Are Just Really Big Jerks!" and "Unicorns Are Just Really Big Jerks!" explains the jerky and weird behavior and ignorance of dogs and unicorns.
The poem collection in the book perfectly captures the inner workings of the jerk unicorn and dog psyche.
The book includes funny, hilarious, and whimsical illustrations that reveal one horned horses and doggies at their jerkiest moments.
Timmie opens the window of truth to shed light onto the most humorous and most daring jerk moments lived by these sparkly, rainbow colored, lazy, fickle, perky, and pesky animals as they are going on about their day in a truly jerky way.
Timmie exposes true jerk personality and exposes some secrets that have never been told before.
Timmie takes a very refreshing approach (and you will laugh out loud!) and tells his rhyming story that is chock full of jerk personality, a jerkiness that really is out of this world (ootwjr AKA out of this world jerk reality!)
Let yourself be wowed and dive into a totally new genre of dog and unicorn jerkiness because you won't believe how these jerks are acting when they think nobody is watching them...
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Story
Fired from his longtime job as captain of the Coal Patrol, two-foot-three-inch, 1,300-year-old elf Gumdrop Coal is angry. He's one of Santa's original elves, inspired by the fat man's vision to bring joy to children on that one special day each year. But somewhere along the way, things went sour for Gumdrop. Maybe it was delivering one too many lumps of coal for the Naughty List. Maybe it's the conspiracy against Christmas that he's starting to sense down every chimney.
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Fantastic Holiday Listen
- By PastorJim on 12-17-10
By: Ken Harmon
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Christmas Camp
- A Novel
- By: Karen Schaler
- Narrated by: Ann Marie Gideon
- Length: 8 hrs and 32 mins
- Unabridged
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Haley Hanson’s idea of the perfect Christmas is escaping to the Caribbean to work so she can avoid all the traditional Christmas distractions. Over the years, she’s sacrificed her personal life to climb the corporate ladder at a prestigious Boston advertising agency. Now she just needs to land a coveted Christmas toy company account to make partner. But first, her boss, Larry, thinks she needs a holiday attitude adjustment, so he ships her off to a Christmas Camp at Holly Peak Inn to help her find her Christmas spirit.
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A completely satisfying Christmas romance.
- By Jhirst on 11-25-18
By: Karen Schaler
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The Secret Diary of Laura Palmer (Twin Peaks)
- By: Jennifer Lynch
- Narrated by: Sheryl Lee
- Length: 6 hrs and 42 mins
- Unabridged
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Lifeless and wrapped in plastic. This is how Sheryl Lee was first introduced as "Laura Palmer" in the cult television classic, Twin Peaks. Now, Sheryl returns to voice Laura's darkest secrets in the audiobook event that fans of the show have long awaited.
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Wrapped in plastic
- By Phillip Frangules on 05-08-17
By: Jennifer Lynch
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In Search of Cleo
- How I Found My Pussy and Lost My Mind
- By: Gina Gershon
- Narrated by: Gina Gershon
- Length: 3 hrs and 12 mins
- Unabridged
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In Search of Cleo follows Gina’s desperation and despair when her assistant loses her beloved cat, Cleo. Gina spends two months roaming the back streets of Los Angeles at all hours of the night, searching for Cleo and meeting several quirky and outrageous characters who help or hinder her in different ways, including Ellen DeGeneres, who searches with Gina and recommends her pet psychic, Sonia; Arthur, the newspaper delivery man who gives her advice; and the mysterious fortune-teller....
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Loved it!!!
- By Kathryn Prusick Gould on 03-15-16
By: Gina Gershon
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Familyhood
- By: Paul Reiser
- Narrated by: Paul Reiser
- Length: 5 hrs and 18 mins
- Unabridged
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In Familyhood, Reiser shares his observations on parenting, marriage, and mid-life with the wit, warmth, and humor that he’s so well-known for. From the first experience of sending his two boys off to summer camp to maneuvering the minefield of bad words learned at school, this hilarious new book captures the spirit of familyhood, the logical next frontier for Reiser’s trademark perspective on the universal truths of life, love, and relationships.
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Witty and warm, a pleasurable read
- By Frank on 06-03-11
By: Paul Reiser
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Emily the Strange
- The Lost Days
- By: Rob Reger
- Narrated by: Angela Goethals
- Length: 5 hrs and 42 mins
- Unabridged
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Emily the Strange: 13 years old. Able to leap tall buildings, probably, if she felt like it. More likely to be napping with her four black cats; or cobbling together a particle accelerator out of lint, lentils, and safety pins; or rocking out on drums/ guitar/ saxophone/ zither; or painting a swirling feral sewer mural; or forcing someone to say "swirling feral sewer mural" 13 times fast.... and pointing and laughing.
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Grrrrrrrrrraaattrt!!!
- By Vkatz76 on 05-20-23
By: Rob Reger
What listeners say about Dog Poems for Kids: Rhyming Books for Children
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- JenniferF
- 12-15-14
Silly stories...
What made the experience of listening to Dog Poems for Kids: Rhyming Books for Children the most enjoyable?
Coming at these stories from the idea that these animals are jerks is pretty funny!
Have you listened to any of Chelsea Lee Rock’s other performances before? How does this one compare?
I liked Chelsea's reading on this one...it came really natural for her :)
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