
He/She/They
How We Talk About Gender and Why It Matters
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Narrated by:
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Schuyler Bailar
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By:
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Schuyler Bailar
About this listen
From a trans rights activist and athlete, an urgent guide that changes the conversation about gender identity.
Anti-transgender legislation is being introduced in state governments around the United States in record-breaking numbers. Trans people are under attack in sports, healthcare, school curriculum, bathrooms, bars, and nearly every walk of life. He/She/They compassionately addresses fundamental topics, from why being transgender is not a choice and why pronouns are important, to more complex issues including how gender-affirming healthcare can be lifesaving.
With a relatable narrative rooted in science, and history, Schuyler helps restore common sense and humanity to a discussion that continues to be divisively coopted and deceptively politicized. He/She/They is more than a book on allyship; it also speaks to trans folks directly, celebrating radical trans joy.
National Bestseller
Winner, 2023 Porchlight Business Book Awards
Longlisted, 2024 Carnegie Medals for Excellence in Nonfiction
Forbes 30 Under 30
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- By Grant Vargas on 06-01-24
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The T Guide
- Our Trans Experiences and a Celebration of Gender Expression—Man, Woman, Nonbinary, and Beyond
- By: Gigi Gorgeous, Gottmik (a.k.a Kade Gottlieb), Swan Huntley
- Narrated by: Gigi Gorgeous, Gottmik (a.k.a Kade Gottlieb)
- Length: 4 hrs and 1 min
- Unabridged
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In this fabulous, fashion-forward guide, transgender icons Gigi Gorgeous and Gottmik discuss the ins and outs of being transgender with their honest, hilarious, and GORGEOUS tales of what it means to be true to oneself—and they've picked up a few friends along the way. Whether you're embarking on your own transgender journey or seeking the knowledge to be the best ally you can be, there is something to be learned from every story they tell.
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Very Interesting
- By sccergirl22 on 12-06-24
By: Gigi Gorgeous, and others
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Gay Bar
- Why We Went Out
- By: Jeremy Atherton Lin
- Narrated by: Jeremy Atherton Lin
- Length: 7 hrs and 52 mins
- Unabridged
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In the era of Grindr and same-sex marriage, gay bars are closing down at an alarming rate. What, then, was the gay bar? Set between Los Angeles, San Francisco, and London, Gay Bar takes us on a time-traveling, transatlantic bar hop through pulsing nightclubs, after-work dives, hardcore leather bars, gay cafes, and saunas, asking what these places meant to their original clientele, what they meant to the author as a younger man, and what they mean now.
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Gay Bar : A Review
- By Anonymous User on 05-17-21
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Free to Be
- Understanding Kids & Gender Identity
- By: Jack Turban MD
- Narrated by: Sean Patrick Hopkins, Jack Turban MD
- Length: 7 hrs and 20 mins
- Unabridged
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Kids today are more gender fluent and expansive than ever before. In America, around two percent of teenagers (over 700,000) openly identify as transgender. As it becomes increasingly common for us to encounter and know transgender kids, as well as kids with more expansive notions of gender than past generations, it is vital that we have the tools we need in order to truly see and support them. Free to Be is an authoritative deep dive by internationally renowned child and adolescent psychiatrist Dr. Jack Turban into the science, medicine, and politics of gender identity.
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A book that actually centers trans voices
- By Emil Cucksee on 06-11-24
By: Jack Turban MD
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Love That Story
- Observations from a Gorgeously Queer Life
- By: Jonathan Van Ness
- Narrated by: Jonathan Van Ness
- Length: 5 hrs and 44 mins
- Unabridged
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The Emmy-nominated host of Netflix’s Queer Eye follows up his New York Times-bestselling memoir, Over The Top, with this collection of thought-provoking essays on grief and healing, cannabis reform, LGBTQIA+ rights, imposter syndrome, personal style, the HIV safety net, and of, course, how to make your hairdresser love you.
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Thank you!
- By cathrine ramson on 04-16-22
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Eat, Poop, Die
- How Animals Make Our World
- By: Joe Roman PhD
- Narrated by: Claire Christie
- Length: 8 hrs and 52 mins
- Unabridged
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If forests are the lungs of the planet, then animals migrating across oceans, streams, and mountains—eating, pooping, and dying along the way—are its heart and arteries, pumping nitrogen and phosphorus from deep-sea gorges up to mountain peaks, from the Arctic to the Caribbean. Without this conveyor belt of crucial, life-sustaining nutrients, the world would look very different.
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Excellent!
- By Lee on 07-20-24
By: Joe Roman PhD
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Furia
- By: Yamile Saied Méndez
- Narrated by: Sol Madariaga
- Length: 8 hrs and 52 mins
- Unabridged
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In Rosario, Argentina, Camila Hassan lives a double life. At home, she is a careful daughter, living within her mother’s narrow expectations, in her rising-soccer-star brother’s shadow, and under the abusive rule of her short-tempered father. On the field, she is La Furia, a powerhouse of skill and talent. When her team qualifies for the South American tournament, Camila gets the chance to see just how far those talents can take her. In her wildest dreams, she’d get an athletic scholarship to a North American university.
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The title
- By Tanya Montoya on 04-22-25
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The Sons of El Rey
- By: Alex Espinoza
- Narrated by: Gisela Chípe, Tony Chiroldes, Lee Osorio, and others
- Length: 10 hrs and 21 mins
- Unabridged
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Ernesto Vega has lived many lives, from pig farmer to construction worker to famed luchador El Rey Coyote, yet he has always worn a mask. He was discovered by a local lucha libre trainer at a time when luchadores—Mexican wrestlers donning flamboyant masks and capes—were treated as daredevils or rock stars. Ernesto found fame, rapidly gaining name recognition across Mexico, but at great expense, nearly costing him his marriage to his wife Elena.
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Engaging and Emotional
- By Carlo Manuel on 01-25-25
By: Alex Espinoza
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The Hidden World of the Fox
- By: Adele Brand
- Narrated by: Jane McDowell
- Length: 5 hrs and 10 mins
- Unabridged
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The fox. For thousands of years, myth and folklore have celebrated its cunning intelligence. Today, the red fox is the nature’s most populous carnivore, its dancing orange tail a common sight in backyards. Yet, who is this wild neighbor, truly? How do we negotiate this uneasy new chapter of an ancient relationship? Join British ecologist Adele Brand on a journey to discover the surprising secrets of the fabled fox, the familiar yet enigmatic creature that has adapted to the human world with astonishing - some say, unsettling - success.
By: Adele Brand
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Aftermath
- By: LeVar Burton
- Narrated by: LeVar Burton
- Length: 9 hrs and 59 mins
- Unabridged
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America today is teetering on the edge of the alarming vision presented in LeVar Burton’s debut novel, written more than two decades ago. In 2012, the first African American president is assassinated by a White extremist - just four days after he is elected. The horrific tragedy leads to riots, financial collapse, and ultimately, a full-on civil war. In its aftermath, millions are left homeless as famine and disease spread throughout the country. But from Chicago, a mysterious voice cries out.
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Scary, frightful, and engaging.
- By Micheal on 07-23-21
By: LeVar Burton
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Ask
- Tap Into the Hidden Wisdom of People Around You for Unexpected Breakthroughs In Leadership and Life
- By: Jeff Wetzler, Amy Edmondson
- Narrated by: Gary Tiedemann
- Length: 8 hrs and 29 mins
- Unabridged
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Globally recognized expert on learning and leadership, Jeff Wetzler offers a hands-on, surprisingly effective way to find out what others really think, know, and feel. Ask leads to smarter decisions, more creative solutions, and deeper relationships.
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Thought provoking examples and relevance
- By Holly on 06-24-24
By: Jeff Wetzler, and others
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Pritty
- By: Keith F. Miller Jr.
- Narrated by: Landon Woodson, Eric B. Anthony
- Length: 11 hrs and 4 mins
- Unabridged
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On the verge of summer before his senior year, Jay is a soft soul in a world of concrete. While his older brother is everything people expect a man to be—tough, athletic, and in charge—Jay simply blends into the background to everyone, except when it comes to Leroy. Unsure of what he could have possibly done to catch the eye of the boy who could easily have anyone he wants, Jay isn’t about to ignore the surprising but welcome attention.
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great
- By William Nolen on 05-04-25
What listeners say about He/She/They
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- Jackie in aurora IL
- 03-17-25
Educational and vulnerable
Both educational and vulnerable. Of all the books I’ve read I recommend this is a first read for anyone looking to answer questions they have about gender.
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- Paul
- 10-24-23
Phenomenal book!
This is a wonderful book! I just finished listening to it, and also purchased a book to highlight several parts where the wording, ideas and stories touched my heart. Thank you thank you thank you for putting your heart into this amazing resource for allies, parents and the world. 🏳️⚧️
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2 people found this helpful
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- DK
- 03-16-24
Deeply insightful and illuminating
Helped me learn so much about both one person’s experience of being trans and the challenges that society presents to people who aren’t cis/het. Generously written and narrated. Highly recommend.
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1 person found this helpful
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- Kathleen
- 07-23-24
A very comprehensive book about what it is to be transgender by a very articulate transgender man
Now over 80 years of age, I purchased this book because I wanted to learn more about transgender issues, which seem to be increasingly in the news. I was also curious about why everyone seems to be putting their pronouns after their names, as well as what those pronouns mean about the person.
In this book, Schuyler addresses anything anyone might wonder about transgender issues. It is immensely readable, human, and comprehensive. I highly recommend reading it to anyone who has any questions about what it is to be transgender and why anyone would change one’s gender. Schuyler describes how and why a transgender person might or might not choose to alter their external sexual characteristics, including their genitals. One of the first sections of the book discusses the assignment of gender at birth, often despite ambiguous genitalia, and before the full expression of sex hormones can occur. There is a large section about transgender athletes, which I found particularly illuminating. Lia Thomas’ journey was addressed in this book and anyone who wonders why she, a transgender woman, has been permitted to compete as a woman swimmer at the highest level of competition should read this book
The book concludes with how one might become a transgender ally; This may be the only way to stop the trend of harmful recent legislation against related issues, such as forcing people to use the bathroom corresponding to their gender at birth, and other issues the patriarchy seems intent upon.
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- harperlee
- 02-23-24
The writer’s balance
Liked it all. Very helpful read. Thank you, your book was informative and helpful. I want to read more.
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1 person found this helpful
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- C
- 11-30-24
Informative
Great book. Very informative. Good story telling. Disappointed book does not include the PDF attachment for additional information as stated.
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- Lindsay
- 01-10-24
Truly Outstanding
Schuyler is unbelievably insightful and thoughtful, and I found his way of explaining each topic so inclusive and kind. As the mother of a trans child I was already an ally, but now I can be an even better one because Schuyler chose to let us in and share his experiences.
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1 person found this helpful
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- Emily Alford
- 03-19-24
So beautiful and educational
What a joy to listen to as you smile, cry, laugh and shout along the way. Wonderfully educational for the ally who strives to understand in order to help protect and support.
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1 person found this helpful
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- Alexis Hall
- 10-22-23
Amazing take on trans existence!
As a Latino trans man beginning my gender affirmation journey, I really appreciated the intersectional scope Schuyler provided. He’s such an inspiration to our community and I love seeing trans content that isn’t made by a white person. Such an educational reas for cis and trans folk❤️🏳️⚧️
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- Wave
- 11-29-23
Honest, compassionate, loving, encouraging and educated
Schuyler did an amazing job with this book using honesty, compassion, love, and encouragement to embrace everyone who is brave enough to open his book regardless of their gender or sexuality. The use of personal experiences with educational material make this book inspiring, empowering and an enjoyable read.
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