Hold On to Your Kids Audiobook By Gordon Neufeld, Gabor Maté MD cover art

Hold On to Your Kids

Why Parents Need to Matter More than Peers

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Hold On to Your Kids

By: Gordon Neufeld, Gabor Maté MD
Narrated by: Gabor Maté MD, Daniel Maté
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About this listen

This parenting classic on one of the most disturbing and misunderstood trends of our time—peers replacing parents in the lives of children—is now more relevant than ever. The latest edition includes new material on how social media and video game culture are affecting our children, and what parents can do.

In Hold On to Your Kids, Dr. Neufeld and Dr. Maté explore the phenomenon of peer orientation: the troubling tendency of children and youth to look to their peers for direction—for a sense of right and wrong, for values, identity and codes of behavior. But peer orientation undermines family cohesion, poisons the school atmosphere, and fosters an aggressively hostile and sexualized youth culture. It provides a powerful explanation for schoolyard bullying and youth violence; it is an escalating trend that has never been adequately described or contested until Hold On to Your Kids. Once understood, it becomes self-evident—as do the solutions.

©2008 Gabor Maté (P)2018 Vintage Canada
Child Psychology Developmental Psychology Parenting & Families Psychology Relationships Teenagers Young Adult Inspiring Thought-Provoking Mental Health Kids Development

Critic reviews

Hold on to Your Kids blows in from Canada like a Blue Northern, bringing us genuinely new ideas and fresh perspectives on parenting. The authors integrate psychology, anthropology, neurology and their own personal and professional experiences as they examine the 'context' of parenting today. This is a worthy book with practical implications for mom and dad.”—Dr. Mary Pipher, author of Reviving Ophelia and The Shelter of Each Other

“With the benefit of 30 years of research and experience, Neufeld has crafted a coherent, compelling theory of child development that will cause an immediate frisson of recognition and acceptance in its readers. His approach has the power to change, if not save, the lives of our children.”National Post

Hold on to Your Kids is visionary book that goes beyond the usual explanations to illuminate a crisis of unrecognized proportions. The authors show us how we are losing contact with our children and how this loss undermines their development and threatens the very fabric of society. Most importantly they offer, through concrete examples and clear suggestions, practical help for parents to fulfill their instinctual roles. A brilliant and well written book, one to be taken seriously, very seriously.”—Peter A. Levine Ph.D., International teacher and author of the bestselling books: Waking the Tiger, Healing Trauma and It Won’t Hurt Forever: Guiding Your Child through Trauma

What listeners say about Hold On to Your Kids

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Insightful Parenting Advice Practical Parenting Tips Steady Narration Valuable Attachment Concepts
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Vital

It's probably one of the most important books I've read. Not only does it explain why our culture is headed the direction it is, but it also gives us a way out of the course it's taking us in.

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I wish I had this book with my first child

I wish I had this book with my first child. I love the content of this book as it makes total sense. We as a culture can stand to approach our children in this relationship-oriented manner...we would create a better future for our children and the world. I have already recommended this to my friends and family. I am working hard to put this into practice with my own family. Great narration as well, which is a great bonus!

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One of the most crucial parenting books of our time.

A fire hose of information on the importance of a child having a stable relationship with his/her parents vs peers to be able to flourish. With screens and tech, the message of this book is even more desperately needed.

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much needed info to hear

I recommend this book STRONGLY!! I needed to hear everything spoke and deep down knew - but was lost as someone that grew up without and then slightly with and just wasn't sure if it was my own fear of the unknown causing concern.... please listen - please reach out to your other parents to assist in the village. I for one am contacting all of my pear parents to adjust and assist in creating the new age of "village". thank you!

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Would help even those without children

Amazing work. The first 8 chapters are about the signs of peer- oriented children and the risks of that. Finally, chapter 9 onward answers the question of What can we do about it?

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Hitchhiker’s guide to your kids!

As with everything, take it with a grain of salt. This has been very helpful and insightful in many ways to me. I have a 12yr old active boy, who’s very much in the digital world but also in many sport leagues - his choice. He’s a good kid overall, though it has been tough to get more 1:1 time with him, lately, during dinner time and bed time mainly. I make it a mission to go out at least once a week for us to bond over lunch or dinner at a restaurant. I’ll definitely practice and exercise all the learning on this book. Great guide and reference.

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I highly recommended this book

So much insight. Wish I could of listen to this book sooner. I recommend it for any age group of child and parent in need of some insight..

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Reconnect

This gave me so many insights on how to connect with my kids. It has inspired me to start my own "village".

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A must read for parents

If there's such a thing as a "how to" guide to raising kids and avoiding a lot of the accepted challenges that come with it, this is it!

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For every parent…. For everyone adult!!!

This is the single best parenting book out there. Every adult, not only parents, should be required to read this. It would solve so many of our issues today. Thank you for writing such an insightful book! It gives me such encouragement to be what my kids need me to be and give them what they truly need.

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