I'll Be Gone in the Dark
One Woman's Obsessive Search for the Golden State Killer
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About this listen
The basis for the major six-part HBO documentary series.
Number one New York Times best seller.
A best book of the year:
Washington Post | Maureen Corrigan, NPR | Paste | Seattle Times | Entertainment Weekly | Esquire | Slate | Buzzfeed | Jezebel | Philadelphia Inquirer | Publishers Weekly | Kirkus Reviews | Library Journal | Bustle
Winner of the Goodreads Choice Awards for Nonfiction | Anthony Award winner | SCIBA Book Award winner | Finalist for the Edgar Award for Best Fact Crime | Longlisted for the Carnegie Medal for Excellence
The haunting true story of the elusive serial rapist turned murderer who terrorized California during the '70s and '80s, and of the gifted journalist who died tragically while investigating the case - which was solved in April 2018.
Introduction by Gillian Flynn
Afterword by Patton Oswalt
“A brilliant genre-buster.... Propulsive, can’t-stop-now reading.” (Stephen King)
For more than 10 years, a mysterious and violent predator committed 50 sexual assaults in Northern California before moving south, where he perpetrated 10 sadistic murders. Then he disappeared, eluding capture by multiple police forces and some of the best detectives in the area.
Three decades later, Michelle McNamara, a true-crime journalist who created the popular website TrueCrimeDiary.com, was determined to find the violent psychopath she called "the Golden State Killer". Michelle pored over police reports, interviewed victims, and embedded herself in the online communities that were as obsessed with the case as she was.
I’ll Be Gone in the Dark - the masterpiece McNamara was writing at the time of her sudden death - offers an atmospheric snapshot of a moment in American history and a chilling account of a criminal mastermind and the wreckage he left behind. It is also a portrait of a woman’s obsession and her unflagging pursuit of the truth. Utterly original and compelling, it is destined to become a true-crime classic - and may at last unmask the Golden State Killer.
PLEASE NOTE: When you purchase this title, the accompanying PDF will be available in your Audible Library along with the audio.
©2018 Tell Me Productions (P)2018 HarperCollins PublishersListeners also enjoyed...
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"The best true crime books pass on an obsession: they haunt you the way the case haunted the writer. Before Michelle McNamara came along, few besides the most dogged web sleuths and law enforcement knew about the Golden State Killer, a serial predator who stalked, raped, and murdered victims in their own homes in California in the 1970s and ’80s—and then vanished, letting the trail grow cold. Much has been made about whether McNamara’s gorgeously written, obsessively researched book helped catch the suspect who was arrested just two months after its publication. But McNamara herself predicted DNA technology would eventually beat him, though she didn’t live to see it happen. Don’t listen to this book to figure out whether McNamara “solved” the case. Listen to be in the company of her sharp, compassionate, and haunted mind, for which Gabra Zackman’s skillful, subtle narration is the ideal conduit. Listen because this audiobook is, quite simply, on the very short list of masterpieces in the literature of true crime."
—Kat J., Audible Editor
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On a cold night in January 2001, the idyllic community of Dartmouth College was shattered by the discovery that two of its most beloved professors had been hacked to death in their own home. Investigators searched helplessly for clues linking the victims to their murderer or murderers. A few weeks later, across the river, in the town of Chelsea, Vermont, police cars were spotted in front of the house of a high school senior. Soon, the town discovered the incomprehensible reality that two of Chelsea's brightest and most popular sons, were now fugitives, wanted for the murders.
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Terrible
- By Maria on 04-26-20
By: Dick Lehr, and others
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Zodiac
- The Shocking True Story of the Nation's Most Bizarre Mass Murderer
- By: Robert Graysmith
- Narrated by: Stefan Rudnicki
- Length: 10 hrs and 40 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Story
After Jack the Ripper and before Son of Sam there was only one name their equal in terror: the deadly, elusive, and mysterious Zodiac. Beginning in 1968 the hooded mass murderer terrified the city of San Francisco and the Bay Area with a string of brutal killings. A sexual sadist, his pleasure was torture and murder.
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Interesting
- By Z on 05-19-06
By: Robert Graysmith
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Bind, Torture, Kill
- The Inside Story of BTK, the Serial Killer Next Door
- By: Roy Wenzl, Tim Potter, L. Kelly, and others
- Narrated by: Keith Sellon-Wright
- Length: 11 hrs and 7 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
For 31 years, a monster terrorized the residents of Wichita, Kansas. A bloodthirsty serial killer, self-named "BTK" - for "bind them, torture them, kill them" - he slaughtered men, women, and children alike, eluding the police for decades while bragging of his grisly exploits to the media. The nation was shocked when the fiend who was finally apprehended turned out to be Dennis Rader - a friendly neighbor...a devoted husband...a helpful Boy Scout dad...the respected president of his church. Written by four award-winning crime reporters who covered the story for more than 20 years, Bind, Torture, Kill is the most intimate and complete account of the BTK nightmare
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Stomach churning
- By 6catz on 02-19-18
By: Roy Wenzl, and others
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The Case of the Vanishing Blonde
- And Other True Crime Stories
- By: Mark Bowden
- Narrated by: Patrick Garrett
- Length: 6 hrs and 59 mins
- Unabridged
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Story
The number-one best-selling “master of narrative journalism” (New York Times) and author of Black Hawk Down presents a compelling collection of true crime stories.
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Excellent!
- By JBT3 on 08-24-20
By: Mark Bowden
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The Chestnut Man
- A Novel
- By: Soren Sveistrup
- Narrated by: Peter Noble
- Length: 15 hrs and 9 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
A psychopath is terrorizing Copenhagen. His calling card is a “chestnut man” - a handmade doll made of matchsticks and two chestnuts - which he leaves at each bloody crime scene. Examining the dolls, forensics makes a shocking discovery - a fingerprint belonging to a young girl, a government minister’s daughter who had been kidnapped and murdered a year ago. A tragic coincidence - or something more twisted? To save innocent lives, a pair of detectives must put aside their differences to piece together the Chestnut Man’s gruesome clues.
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Good until it is wasn’t
- By chitty chitty bang bang on 10-09-19
By: Soren Sveistrup
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All the Pretty Girls
- Taylor Jackson, Book 1
- By: J. T. Ellison
- Narrated by: Joyce Bean
- Length: 10 hrs and 58 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
When a local girl falls prey to a sadistic serial killer, Nashville homicide lieutenant Taylor Jackson and her lover, FBI profiler Dr. John Baldwin, find themselves in a joint investigation pursuing a vicious murderer. The Southern Strangler is slaughtering his way through the Southeast, leaving a gruesome memento at each crime scene – the prior victim’s severed hand.
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Distracting subplot and uninteresting characters
- By Ed on 05-13-10
By: J. T. Ellison
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Legally Dead
- A Father and Son Bound by Murder
- By: Kevin Flynn, Rebecca Lavoie
- Narrated by: Aven Shore
- Length: 8 hrs and 48 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Attorney Seth Bader and his wife, Vicki, moved to New Hampshire in 1992. Three tumultuous years later, their marriage ended and left Vicki a broken woman, driven to the edge as Seth seduced their teenage son, Joey, into a violent plot to kill her in cold blood. What followed was one of the most bizarre and harrowing crime stories in New Hampshire history.
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Everyone is good at something…
- By Vickijeanne on 06-06-21
By: Kevin Flynn, and others
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A Tangled Web
- A Cyberstalker, a Deadly Obsession, and the Twisting Path to Justice
- By: Leslie Rule
- Narrated by: Tanya Eby
- Length: 11 hrs and 4 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
It was a bleak November in 2012 when Cari Lea Farver vanished from Omaha, Nebraska. Cari, 37, was a devoted mother, reliable employee, and loyal friend - not the type to shirk responsibilities, abandon her son, and run off on an adventure while her dying father took his last breaths. Yet, the many texts from her phone indicated she had done just that. While Cari's boyfriend, Dave Kroupa, and her supervisor were bewildered by her abrupt disappearance, they accepted the texts at face value. Her mother, Nancy Raney, however, was alarmed and reported Cari missing.
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Unbelievable and impossible but sadly all true.
- By maggie mae on 05-12-20
By: Leslie Rule
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One Day
- The Extraordinary Story of an Ordinary 24 Hours in America
- By: Gene Weingarten
- Narrated by: Johnathan McClain
- Length: 11 hrs and 50 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
On New Year’s Day 2013, two-time Pulitzer Prize-winner Gene Weingarten asked three strangers to, literally, pluck a day, month, and year from a hat. That day - chosen completely at random - was Sunday, December 28, 1986, by any conventional measure a most ordinary day. Weingarten spent the next six years proving that there is no such thing. That Sunday between Christmas and New Year’s turned out to be filled with comedy, tragedy, implausible irony, cosmic comeuppances, kindness, cruelty, heroism, cowardice, genius, idiocy, and much more....
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I'm giving this book more credit for its concept
- By J. F. Boyd on 12-24-19
By: Gene Weingarten
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Killer Triggers
- By: Joe Kenda
- Narrated by: Joe Kenda
- Length: 8 hrs and 30 mins
- Unabridged
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Story
The most common triggers for homicide are fear, rage, revenge, money, lust, and, more rarely, sheer madness. This isn’t an exact science, of course. Any given murder can have multiple triggers. Sex and revenge seem to be common partners in crime. This book offers my memories of homicide cases that I investigated or oversaw. In each case, I examine the trigger that led to death. I chose this theme for the book because even though the why of a murder case may not be critical in an investigation, it can sometimes lead us to the killer.
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Joe Kenda is always fun.
- By Jackson Theofore Keys on 03-10-21
By: Joe Kenda
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Inherit the Bones
- A Detective Gemma Monroe Mystery, Book 1
- By: Emily Littlejohn
- Narrated by: Harper Landry
- Length: 11 hrs and 27 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Story
Secrets and lies can’t stay buried forever in Cedar Valley. In the summer, hikers and campers pack the small Colorado town’s meadows and fields. And in the winter, skiers and snowboarders take over the mountains. Season by season, year after year, time passes, and the lies, like the aspens and evergreens that surround the town, take root and spread deep. Now, someone has uncovered the lies, and it is his murder that continues a chain of events that began almost 40 years ago.
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intriguing
- By Anonymous User on 06-26-19
By: Emily Littlejohn
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The Skeleton Crew
- How Amateur Sleuths Are Solving America's Coldest Cases
- By: Deborah Halber
- Narrated by: Laural Merlington
- Length: 10 hrs and 15 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Story
The Skeleton Crew provides an entree into the gritty and tumultuous world of Sherlock Holmes-wannabes who race to beat out law enforcement-and one another - at matching missing persons with unidentified remains. In America today, upwards of forty thousand people are dead and unaccounted for. These murder, suicide, and accident victims, separated from their names, are being adopted by the bizarre online world of amateur sleuths.
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I Don't Understand
- By Hannah Wallner on 08-07-18
By: Deborah Halber
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Fatal Friends, Deadly Neighbors: And Other True Cases
- Ann Rule's Crime Files, Book 16
- By: Ann Rule
- Narrated by: Laural Merlington
- Length: 13 hrs and 20 mins
- Unabridged
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Story
It’s a chilling reality that homicide investigators know all too well: The last face most murder victims see is not that of a stranger, but of someone familiar. Whether only an acquaintance or a trusted intimate, such killers share a common trait that triggers the downward spiral toward death for someone close to them: They are masters at hiding who they really are. Their clever masks let them appear safe, kind, and truthful. They are anything but - and almost no one can detect the murderous impulses buried deep in their psyches.
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The Evil People Do
- By Dianne on 02-14-13
By: Ann Rule
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Lust Killer
- By: Ann Rule, Andy Stack
- Narrated by: Callie Beaulieu
- Length: 7 hrs and 34 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
When young women begin mysteriously disappearing in Oregon, Police Lieutenant James Stovall leads a relentless search for a killer. With little evidence available, and the public screaming for answers, he must find a remorseless, brutal killer whose identity will shock them all....
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Great book on Brudos!
- By Ms.Bliss on 01-06-18
By: Ann Rule, and others
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Under the Cold Bright Lights
- By: Garry Disher
- Narrated by: Douglas Hansell
- Length: 8 hrs and 25 mins
- Unabridged
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Detective Alan Auhl does things his own way - and gets results. He works cold cases now. Like the death of John Elphick - his daughters are still convinced he was murdered, the coroner not so sure. Or the skeleton that’s just been found under a concrete slab. Or the doctor who killed two wives and a girlfriend and left no evidence at all....
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The unique main character
- By Sarah on 06-25-24
By: Garry Disher
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Our Little Secret
- The True Story of a Teenage Killer and the Silence of a Small New England Town
- By: Kevin Flynn, Rebecca Lavoie
- Narrated by: Aven Shore
- Length: 9 hrs and 3 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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For 20 years Daniel Paquette's murder in New Hampshire went unsolved. It remained a secret between two high school friends until Eric Windhurst's arrest in 2005. What was revealed was a crime born of adolescent passion between Eric and Daniel's stepdaughter, Melanie - redefining the meaning of loyalty, justice, and revenge.
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A
- By Diana Hart 33 on 04-28-21
By: Kevin Flynn, and others
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Worshippers stream out of an Midwestern synagogue after sabbath services, unaware that only a hundred yards away, an expert marksman and avowed racist, antisemite and member of the Ku Klux Klan, patiently awaits, his hunting rifle at the ready. A riveting, cautionary tale rooted in history that continues to echo today, The Killer's Shadow is a terrifying and essential exploration of the criminal personality in the vile grip of extremism and what happens when rage-filled speech evolves into deadly action and hatred of the “other" is allowed full reign.
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A relevant and important read.
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This Ultimate True Crime Case Collection contains disturbing accounts of some of the most brutal and bizarre true crime stories in history. Often told from the killer’s perspective, Green’s riveting narratives draw the listener into the real-life horror experienced by the victims with all the elements of a classic thriller. This collection includes the stories of Harold Shipman, Fred and Rose West, the Kurim case, the Mockingbird Hill massacre, the Truro Murders, Herb Baumeister, Katherine Knight, Henry Lee Lucas, and Nannie Doss.
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With books like Serial Killers, Female Serial Killers and Sons of Cain, Peter Vronsky has established himself as the foremost expert on the history of serial killers. In this first definitive history of the "Golden Age" of American serial murder, when the number and body count of serial killers exploded, Vronsky tells the stories of the most unusual and prominent serial killings from the 1950s to the early 21st century. From Ted Bundy to the Golden State Killer, our fascination with these classic serial killers seems to grow by the day.
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In Chase Darkness with Me, you’ll ride shotgun as journalist Billy Jensen identifies the Halloween Mask Murderer, finds a missing girl in the California Redwoods, and investigates the only other murder in New York City on 9/11. You’ll hear intimate details of the hunts for two of the most terrifying serial killers in history: his friend Michelle’s pursuit of the Golden State Killer which is chronicled in I’ll Be Gone In The Dark which Billy helped finish after Michelle’s passing, and his own quest to find the murderer of the Allenstown 4 family.
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After more than a decade, when sisters Nikki, Sami, and Tori Knotek hear the word mom, it claws like an eagle’s talons, triggering memories that have been their secret since childhood. Until now. For years, behind the closed doors of their farmhouse in Raymond, Washington, their sadistic mother, Shelly, subjected her girls to unimaginable abuse, degradation, torture, and psychic terrors. Through it all, Nikki, Sami, and Tori developed a defiant bond that made them far less vulnerable than Shelly imagined.
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Before Alex Marzano-Lesnevich begins a summer job at a law firm in Louisiana, working to help defend men accused of murder, they think their position is clear. The child of two lawyers, Alex is staunchly anti-death penalty. But the moment convicted murderer Ricky Langley’s face flashes on the screen as Alex reviews old tapes—the moment they hear him speak of his crimes—they are overcome with the feeling of wanting him to die. Shocked by their reaction, Alex digs deeper and deeper into the case.
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Deviant
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From "America's principal chronicler of its greatest psychopathic killers" ( Boston Book Review) comes the definitive account of Ed Gein, a mild-mannered Wisconsin farmhand who stunned an unsuspecting nation - and redefined the meaning of the word psycho.
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Has its Moments but Overly Salacious
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Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil
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Shots rang out in Savannah's grandest mansion in the misty,early morning hours of May 2, 1981. Was it murder or self-defense? For nearly a decade, the shooting and its aftermath reverberated throughout this hauntingly beautiful city of moss-hung oaks and shaded squares. John Berendt's sharply observed, suspenseful, and witty narrative flows like a thoroughly engrossing novel, and yet it is a work of nonfiction.
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LOVED IT!!!
- By Heidi on 07-11-10
By: John Berendt
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The Teacher's Pet
- By: Hedley Thomas
- Narrated by: Full Cast, Hedley Thomas
- Length: 18 hrs and 20 mins
- Unabridged
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If you thought you knew the story of The Teacher's Pet, get ready to be shocked. Hedley Thomas takes you behind the scenes with a blow-by-blow account of one of the most intriguing and enduring murder mysteries of our time - the crime, the podcast investigation, the sexual exploitation of teenage students, the courtroom drama - and how justice was finally delivered.
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Too much not needed details, especially about author!
- By Chris on 04-05-24
By: Hedley Thomas
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The Devil in the White City
- Murder, Magic, and Madness at the Fair That Changed America
- By: Erik Larson
- Narrated by: Scott Brick
- Length: 14 hrs and 58 mins
- Unabridged
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Two men, each handsome and unusually adept at his chosen work, embodied an element of the great dynamic that characterized America’s rush toward the twentieth century. The architect was Daniel Hudson Burnham, the fair’s brilliant director of works and the builder of many of the country’s most important structures, including the Flatiron Building in New York and Union Station in Washington, D.C. The murderer was Henry H. Holmes, a young doctor who, in a malign parody of the White City, built his “World’s Fair Hotel” just west of the fairgrounds.
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A Rich Read!
- By D on 09-18-03
By: Erik Larson
What listeners say about I'll Be Gone in the Dark
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Alette
- 03-27-18
loved it!
I really enjoyed this audiobook! the narrator is amazing, and the story itself is very interesting. it’s written in a clever way that gives you the facts, but in a way you’ll remember them and actually enjoy hearing about them, rather than lists of things for you to remember
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28 people found this helpful
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- Rebecca
- 03-10-18
MICHELLLLLEEE!!!
Girl, your work lives on and when they no doubt catch this coward your work will have played an critical role.
in your life you inspired so many inquisitive minds and in your death you leave behind and incredible legacy showing what shear determination and will can accomplish.
I'm sorry you were not living to see your work published. What we as readers (and listeners) are left with is a testament to not just your incredible dedication towards finding an elusive killer but the impact you had on the lives of those around you.
For anyone who is looking to enter the world of True Crime know that this book and Michelle's prose is unlike any I've ever listened to before. she treats victims with respect. She does not dwell on unnecessary lurid details but rather on the strength of the victims and their families and the incredible determination of the cases lead detectives even decades on.
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7 people found this helpful
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- Jessica Roque
- 04-13-18
Incredible and Haunting
What did you love best about I'll Be Gone in the Dark?
Michelle is such an amazing writer and storyteller. I was actually driving through Oak Park, IL when she was talking about it. It was such a wild coincidence that I was actually driving through the town she was describing and it was like she was sitting next to me describing the streets I was on.
The greatest tragedy is that Michelle will not see this investigation all the way to the close. It seems that they are so close to catching, I hope she will be forever remember for her contribution to not only this case but to true crime overall.
The world lost an incredible woman when it lost Michelle McNamara, but her legacy lives on forever in this book.
What about the narrators’s performance did you like?
Good
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2 people found this helpful
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- Denise T.
- 03-16-18
If only Michelle could see how much her work inspires
This book was wonderful from start to finish. I had a pang I’d hurt every time I’d hear parts were taken from Michelle’s notes. I’ve fallen for her writing style, her determination to find someone that has eluded so many for so long. I only wish Michelle had lived long enough to see just how great her work is in these pages.
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2 people found this helpful
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- Ben Marlin
- 03-11-18
Dark and engrossing
Michelle McNamara's unfinished opus on the East Area Rapist is more artful than most true crime books. Instead of merely listing the nuts and bolts of the crimes, she paints a vivid picture of where they occurred and how they forever changed those involved. She also describes in sad detail the effect of her obsession with the case on her life and health.
The presentation of the book is somewhat disjointed, understandably as it had to be finished posthumously by her husband and research assistants. But each individual section is mesmerizing and even soulful. When McNamara passed away, her loved ones lost the most, but fans of true crime lost the great books she would certainly have written after this.
Gabra Zackman reads McNamara's words with clarity and appropriate gravitas. I would happily listen to other books she has narrated.
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2 people found this helpful
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- questhaven
- 04-13-18
This book is like crack for me
What made the experience of listening to I'll Be Gone in the Dark the most enjoyable?
Michelle McNamara's writing style is beautiful. You can feel her passion for this project in every single word. It's heartbreaking that she passed before EARONS was found.
What other book might you compare I'll Be Gone in the Dark to and why?
No other books compare
Which character – as performed by the narrators – was your favorite?
The narrator as whole did a beautiful job - this is by far the most well narrated book I have listened to.
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1 person found this helpful
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- Shannon L.
- 05-11-18
Amazingly written
Wow! Just Wow! Her writing is amazing and takes you right there along with her on the journey to find the GSK. I just wish she was here to see all of her hard work pay off and that evil man go to jail! Thank you Patton for allowing her to follow her obsession of crime and this cold case! This is a MUST for any true crime fans!
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1 person found this helpful
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- Carolyn K
- 07-29-18
Thought I knew everything there was to know about
GSK, but I was wrong!
This book is not a book of gory factual crime scene details (which is what I was afraid of, having already read all of those), Michelle McNamara is somehow able to make a book about a serial killer into more of a story... vs a crime scene report. She gives persepctive and context to the crimes, detailing what the victims may have been doing before their attacks and how they were perceived by their families. She really focused so much more on the victims and the mystery of it all vs. the killer and his dark sadistic ways. It was not creepy or boring in the least. At one point I started googling Eichler houses and going down the rabbit hole envisioning what the GSK might do while hiding in the bushes watching his victims in their beautiful mid-century mod house.
With that said, there was a change in pace and style once Michelle passed away. This abrupt change is not a negative, but makes you realize just how good Michelle was at writing and making a story out of a bunch of facts/clues/old cold case files. She was brilliant.
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1 person found this helpful
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- tamsin
- 05-11-18
love loved loved it
I always listen to my audible books during my many hours in the car. This was riveting and so well pieces together. I found myself staying in my car longer so I could hear more!
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1 person found this helpful
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- Bonnie D.
- 01-09-19
Must read.
This book gives you a professional look at the dark world of the Golden State Killer. This writer investigated and shared with us the inside....the questions....the answers....
When I was finished with this book I felt like I had been privy to the crime scenes and background information. One of the best books I’ve read and Michelle McNamara was a very talented and extremely passionate woman. I hope she can see this.
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1 person found this helpful