James Acaster's Guide to Quitting Social Media
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Narrated by:
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James Acaster
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By:
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James Acaster
About this listen
This is a self-help book like no other. Because you are not helping yourself, James Acaster is helping you.
When James quit all forms of social media in 2019, he felt like he'd been born anew, but he was worried he'd suffer withdrawal and get lured back online to compete in a never-ending popularity contest with only one possible winner (f--king Zuckerberg). He knew that in order to stay clean, he'd have to replace everything social media used to give him with three-dimensional real-life activities.
And so it was that James found ways to anonymously bully strangers, see photos of everyone's dogs, get invited to as many parties as possible, immediately know about all celebrity deaths, get public figures fired, argue with everybody about everything and so much more without even owning a phone (he painted over the screen of his old one to stop himself looking at Instagram).
His life is amazing and yours could be too if you buy James Acaster's Guide to Quitting Social Media, Being the Best You You Can Be and Saving Yourself from Loneliness Vol. 1.
You will also need to do everything the book tells you to. Including helping us promote the book by tweeting about it.
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Three-time New York Times best-selling author and six-time WWE champion Chris Jericho shares 20 of his most valuable lessons for achieving your goals and living the life you want, jam-packed with fantastic stories and the classic off-the-wall, laugh-out-loud Jericho references he's famous for.
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GOAT is also a Four Letter Word
- By VC on 01-01-18
By: Chris Jericho
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Dear Fatty
- By: Dawn French
- Narrated by: Liza Tarbuck
- Length: 6 hrs and 36 mins
- Abridged
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With a sharp eye for comic detail and a wicked ear for the absurdities of life, Dawn French shows just how an RAF girl from the west country with dreams of becoming a ballerina/bridesmaid/thief rose to become one of the best-loved comedy actresses of our time.
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If you like Dawn French - You will love this book!
- By Pamela on 01-22-09
By: Dawn French
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Lose Well
- By: Chris Gethard
- Narrated by: Chris Gethard
- Length: 9 hrs and 30 mins
- Unabridged
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Let’s face it: we all want a seat at the cool table, a great job, and loads of money. But most of us won’t be able to achieve this widely accepted, black-or-white, definition of winning, which makes us feel like failures, that we’re destined to a life of loserdom. That’s the conventional wisdom. It’s also crap, according to comedian and cult hero Chris Gethard, who knows a thing of two about losing. Failing is an art form, he argues; in fact, it’s the only the way we’re ever going to discover who we are, what we really want, and how to live the kind of life we only dreamed about.
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WHAT A LOSER
- By Amazon Customer on 01-26-19
By: Chris Gethard
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Reveal: Robbie Williams
- By: Chris Heath
- Narrated by: Joe Jameson
- Length: 17 hrs and 4 mins
- Unabridged
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An intimate, funny and frank account of the moments behind the music, of the truth behind the headlines and of the fascinatingly complicated man behind the imperious entertainer, Reveal is Robbie Williams as you've never seen him before. Best-selling author Chris Heath has been working closely with Robbie for many years to create a personal and raw account of fame, fortune, family and music - a vivid and detailed story of the real highs and lows as Robbie has found his way forward, that is unprecedented in its intimacy and honesty.
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Absolutely Briliant!
- By L. Elder on 10-01-17
By: Chris Heath
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Stories I'd Tell in Bars
- By: Jen Lancaster
- Narrated by: Jen Lancaster, John Fletcher
- Length: 8 hrs and 27 mins
- Unabridged
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Unfiltered. Unapologetic. Older, but not wiser, Lancaster goes back to basics in this hilarious essay collection about everything from taking community policing classes to accidentally getting high with her waiter after a fancy dinner. These are the tales she'd tell if she met you in a bar... if she weren't too lazy to put on pants and go to a bar. Offering advice ranging from how to remain happily married to a man who refuses to blow his damn nose already to not creating An Incident at the cheese counter during an attempt at Whole30, she's you, only louder.
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self absorbed
- By D D H on 06-15-19
By: Jen Lancaster
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Challenge Accepted!
- 253 Steps to Becoming an Anti-It Girl
- By: Celeste Barber
- Narrated by: Celeste Barber
- Length: 6 hrs and 24 mins
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Part memoir, part comedy routine, part advice manual, Challenge Accepted! is Celeste at her best, revealing her secrets to love, friendship, family, and marriage (oh hai, #hothusband), and how to deal with life’s many challenges - why she checks the bath for sharks, how Nutella quite literally shaped who she is as a woman, and why being famous on Instagram is like being rich in Monopoly. It’s real, like totally, really real.
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Prepare to crack up in the grocery store
- By Chicago_Mama on 05-30-19
By: Celeste Barber
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Emily the Strange
- The Lost Days
- By: Rob Reger
- Narrated by: Angela Goethals
- Length: 5 hrs and 42 mins
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Emily the Strange: 13 years old. Able to leap tall buildings, probably, if she felt like it. More likely to be napping with her four black cats; or cobbling together a particle accelerator out of lint, lentils, and safety pins; or rocking out on drums/ guitar/ saxophone/ zither; or painting a swirling feral sewer mural; or forcing someone to say "swirling feral sewer mural" 13 times fast.... and pointing and laughing.
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Grrrrrrrrrraaattrt!!!
- By Vkatz76 on 05-20-23
By: Rob Reger
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You Gotta Get Bigger Dreams
- My Life in Stories and Pictures
- By: Alan Cumming
- Narrated by: Alan Cumming
- Length: 3 hrs and 19 mins
- Unabridged
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Described by the New York Times as “a bawdy countercultural sprite” and named one of the most fun people in show business by Time magazine, Alan Cumming is a genuine quadruple threat - an internationally acclaimed, award-winning star of stage, television, and film, as well as a New York Times best-selling author whose real-life vivacity, wit, and charm shine through every minute of his third book, You Gotta Get Bigger Dreams.
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We would be friends
- By Peg on 11-28-16
By: Alan Cumming
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David Mitchell: Back Story
- By: David Mitchell
- Narrated by: David Mitchell
- Length: 9 hrs and 25 mins
- Unabridged
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David Mitchell, who you may know for his inappropriate anger on every TV panel show except Never Mind the Buzzcocks, his look of permanent discomfort on C4 sex comedy Peep Show, his online commenter-baiting in The Observer or just for wearing a stick-on moustache in That Mitchell and Webb Look, has written a book about his life.
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One of the Funniest, Clever Brits around
- By Delia on 08-30-13
By: David Mitchell
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Size Matters Not
- The Extraordinary Life and Career of Warwick Davis
- By: Warwick Davis
- Narrated by: Gideon Emery
- Length: 8 hrs and 20 mins
- Unabridged
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You may not recognize my name-or my face for that matter-but it's very likely you've seen me at work. I've managed to cram quite a bit into my thirty-year acting career. In fact I've helped put more bums on cinema seats than Will Smith or Tom Hanks. Who else can say that they've helped destroy a Death Star? Defeated an evil sorceress? Taught magic to Harry Potter? Become a Jedi Master? Reluctantly hitchhiked across the galaxy in search of the answer to the Ultimate Question?
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Sincere and heart-warming
- By Alice on 10-04-15
By: Warwick Davis
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Why I Hate Green Beans
- And Other Confessions About Relationships, Reality TV, and How We See Ourselves
- By: Lincee Ray
- Narrated by: Lincee Ray
- Length: 4 hrs and 57 mins
- Unabridged
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If there is one thing Lincee Ray has learned over the years, it's that the majority of women on the planet struggle with insecurities. Our skinny jeans mock us. Our just-trying-to-help mothers are just driving us crazy. Our social media feeds taunt us with everyone else's picture-perfect lives. It's enough to send you on a gummy-bear bender while binge-watching Friends reruns and not showering for a week. Lincee knows. She's been there. Right there, in fact. Gummy bears and all.
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Perfect in every way!
- By Anonymous User on 10-19-22
By: Lincee Ray
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What listeners say about James Acaster's Guide to Quitting Social Media
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Kennedy
- 07-24-24
Fuckin brilliant!
This man never ceases to amaze me. Live, print and audio, he always tugs at my funny heart bone. I’m on my second listen and just ordered the paperback to mark up. My forever comedian crush because his clever brain is beautiful and he’s easy on my eyes. 🖤
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- Luke L.
- 11-13-22
Hilarious
Audiobook was the way to go with this one. Hearing this book in James Acaster's voice felt like a 6-hour version of his standup.
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- D Car
- 11-01-22
Brilliant
I’m certain he’s a comic genius. His books and comedy just make life better. His narration is also fantastic.
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- lserver362
- 08-22-22
Utterly Absurd!
Huge James Acaster fan here, this book made me laugh aloud and also question why this was made. It really is just made up stories, which after seeing interviews with James I have a better appreciation of the book on the whole. I kinda like that he's in a position to do something like this.
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1 person found this helpful
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- Kindle Customer
- 03-04-23
loved it!
thoroughly enjoyed this audio book! very clever and funny - had me in stitches the entire time.
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- Beth Magne-Watts
- 10-31-22
Ridiculous, brilliant, nonsense
All I could have hoped for and more. So much ridiculousness and so clever. Made me LOL while running, which made people around me LOL in return - spreading the happiness!
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- the dude
- 01-23-24
A+ it worked for me!
Brilliant, informative, and thorough; I was skeptical at first, but stuck it through and the results were amazing. Highly recommend.
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- Bonnie Kennedy
- 10-06-22
Help yourself be helped by his help
Acaster has done it- he's written the Great American Novel.
Finally, a self help book that works instantly! I used to be just like you: absolutely lame. But now, with the advice from this life changing book, I've turned a new leaf! It has everything: dumb babies, smart babies, tar, eels, an older man for a pen pal, balls fully inflated with honey, catering, and much much more! After taking this advice to the face for a solid 7 hours, I finally feel ready to take back control of my life, and to blossom into the best me I can be, privately, where no one can see me or judge me or speak to me or perceive me or speak my name (Rumplestiltskin style).
Thank you, James Acaster. You've changed some lives today.
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- Clare Katz
- 08-20-22
Hilarious and insightful
I love everything James Acaster does and this book was wonderful. Whimsical, absurd, clever and insightful. Perfectly performed. A joy!
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- Frank
- 08-28-22
All the James Acaster I Can Handle
Full disclosure: I think James Acaster is hilarious and when I have the time I watch his comedy on YouTube and NetFlix. The book is all read by Mr. Acaster and that is very fun. It is creative and has genuine messages woven in which made the book more enjoyable for me. However, it is not full of his witty repertoire when he interacts with other comedians and I found that I much prefer that form of his humor. This was an easy listen and I was done with it before I knew it.
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