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Living out Loud

By: Christina Lee, Nyrae Dawn
Narrated by: Wyatt Kelley, Max T. Mitchell
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Publisher's summary

Ben Emerson has lived by his minister father's rules most of his life. Born into an ultraconservative church community, he's finally brave enough to break free and move to San Francisco. Distancing himself certainly helps create a new mind-set, but living as an openly gay man takes some getting used to. When he reaches out to Xavier, a childhood friend who lives in the city, Ben isn't sure how he'll respond given their thorny history. Ben hopes the familiar connection will help him right some wrongs as well as provide the solace he's been craving.

Xavier Ramos is who he is, and he doesn't give a damn what anyone thinks. Whether it's eyeliner, nail polish, tattoos, or his love of hooking up, he uses his body as a form of self-expression but doesn't let anyone get too close. When Ben reenters his life, Xavier helps him experience the city and feel comfortable in his own skin. Seeing the world through Ben's eyes, he begins to wonder if he's also not living as freely as he thought.

When Xavier challenges Ben's beliefs about sex, it becomes explosive - for both of them. Xavier breaks apart Ben's sheltered world and shows him what it's like to live out loud. The more time they spend together, the more Xavier begins to long for Ben in a different way - one that both surprises and scares him. But real life doesn't fade into the background, so when Ben's past comes knocking, old habits are hard to break. Testing the foundation of their deepening connection will take a trust that will either bind them...or tear them apart.

Riley Hart writing as Nyrae Dawn

©2017 Christina Lee and Nyrae Dawn (P)2018 Audible, Inc.
  • Unabridged Audiobook
  • Categories: LGBTQ+
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What listeners say about Living out Loud

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  • Overall
    4 out of 5 stars
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    4 out of 5 stars

Second Chances

I loved this story. Xavier and Ben’s second chance at romance was sweet. They each had their own hang ups and obstacles that the needed to overcome, but together, they were able to support each other. Their love was precious, and the growth of their relationship was wonderful. The book was well written and flowed smoothly. I enjoyed it.

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1 person found this helpful

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    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

Outstanding !!! Best of the series

This was such a sweet story I truly enjoyed it. The others in the series are all good too this just may be my favorite. Have read other or Nyrae’s other books and loved them too. Really liked both narrators too. Highly highly recommend this audiobook !!!!!!

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  • Overall
    4 out of 5 stars
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    4 out of 5 stars

Everyone deserves to live out loud!

Living Out Loud is a wonderful story about friendship, finding yourself, and second chances. I adored Ben and Xavier. They both had pretty rough childhoods, with parents who left a lot to be desired. It really colored Ben's outlook on life. I wanted to reach in and wrap him up and tell him he was good and worthy and there was nothing wrong with him! And I wanted to tell Xavier he was so deserving of being loved.

It's no secret second-chance romances are one of my favorite tropes. And when you add in childhood friends, it makes my little heart so happy. When Ben and Xavier reconnected it wasn't with the expectation of anything more than just 2 friends getting a chance to clear the air and maybe start over again. But when Xavier shows Ben everything he's been missing in life the lines between them start to blur. Ben still has a lot of unresolved feelings and issues stemming from his upbringing and I loved that Xavier was there for him, to help him see it was more than okay to be his true self.

The narrators were terrific! They fit the characters so well, and both did a fantastic job bringing Ben and Xavier to life. I have to give a shout-out to the one who voiced Ben, though. (I wish Audible noted who narrated which character in m/m stories when it's dual narration.) He did an outstanding job showcasing Ben's vulnerabilty.
I'll definitely be looking for more books narrated by both Wyatt and Max.

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  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
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    4 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

So good

Couldn't put it down. I could feel Ben's pain as if it was my own. Truly beautiful writing.

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  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

oh my.heart!

What a beautiful love story ❤ with depth and honesty about the complexities of life and love. This novel has everything..... an intimate look into learning to love and accept ourselves, truth to lies ...hot intimate love scenes, characters that come to life...I literally cried but never lost hope for B and Z's happily ever after.

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    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

Put on some nail polish and express yourself

I LOVE this story, it is very soft in it's intensity and really shows the struggles Ben faced with discovering himself but also celebrates the freedom he discovers in the life he slowly builds for himself. The renewal of his friendship with Xavier is the perfect setting for him to allow what has always been inside him blossom.
I love Xavier as a character, because he is not a cookie cutter character although he could easily have fallen into the cliche' of the emo tattooed guy. Both men have a very interesting personality, and I feel they show a divers queer character as well in a genre that is not always that inclusive.
I feel like they both explore their sexuality and discover new things about each other, the buildup is sensual and erotic but also full of friendship and pure fun. Xavier is always focused of making sure Ben experiences anything he finds interesting and doesn't let him hold himself back. Together they rise above the fears and insecurities and become better.
The love and support in this book are truly amazing to read about and it was a great romance.

The narrators are both new to me but I liked they way each of them rendered the characters, especially Ben's narrator. They put all the emotions into their voice and brought this story to life.

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  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

Way better

This seems to be a spinoff from the Freefall series. I was incredibly disappointed with the first book in that series and couldn’t even finish it. Which was weird because I have liked everything else from these authors. This one was back up to par and highly enjoyable! Don’t know what went wrong with the first Freefall book but maybe I will give the second and third ones a chance.

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  • Overall
    3 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    2 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    3 out of 5 stars

the book version is better

I have read all the books within the series and when I saw some of them were on audible I was excited. The first story (Tobias and Levi) was phenomenal.The narrator Sean C. did a wonderful job so I had high expectations for this book; that was not the case.
The narrator of the story in particular the young man who does Ben's voice sounds like he is auditioning for a high school play and the only role he actually gets is handing out the tickets. The young man who did Xavier voice wasn't too bad but if you listen to Hundred Thousand Words you have an expectation of how you expect Xavier to sound and he doesn't in this book.
Also there is a huge mistake towards the end of the book where Ben calls Xavier, Javier ( I know they're essentially the same name just spelled differently but he pronounces them completely different) a nd he doesn't in the actual book so I don't know why they didn't pick up on this mistake when they were recording the audible version.
I know it seems a bit harsh and I'm nitpicking but you paid good money for all your books and you expect them to be quality productions and this was not the case.
Just get stick with the book for this version

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  • Overall
    3 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars
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    2 out of 5 stars

Finally finished. Starts strong, goes flat.

Initially, I gave up out of boredom with just over an hour to go. Since I spent a credit, I have gone back and finished.

This is a pairing I expected to do better. A solid premise and a good start quickly turns into non stop sex with bits of story in between. Where there could be some angst and struggle there is virtually none. Xavier is left very one note - always clenching his fists and jaw over Ben’s past treatment by his parents. Ben is always having flashbacks, yet nothing ever shuts him down.

The narrators do a good job, the blend is ok, Ben who is more active and outdoorsy is voiced as the softer of the pair which feels odd. Ben's narrator has an amazing turn when he voices a group of the church ladies and it is downright delicious.

While the story starts out as a desire to break free of the shackles of his past and sexually empower Ben, it loses any impact when Ben has zero problem doing anything Xavier wants him to do. And many of things they do, Ben did with a prior BF. The fact that he immediately joins in what is suggested feels like there’s more an issue that he needed someone to help finesse, rather than break through. Ben has had one real romantic relationship before that ended very badly. His past connection to Xavier and feelings he has harbored for him makes the premise weaker, Ben has long wanted Xavier, Xavier has never forgetten Ben, so the direction of their relationship isn't a surprise.

I enjoyed Lee’s Love Me Louder and Kick Flip, definitely angsty stories of men with things to overcome. Dawn is more complicated as she is also Riley Hart. Dawn’s 100,000 Words is my main exposure to her work under that name, I went back and checked my review, and I hovered between a three and four star rating on that book and opted for the four star because this genre needs broader representation - but I had a lot of issues with it.

Where I am confused is that Riley Hart can really dish out the gut punch moments and resolve the story beautifully. Her book Risk The Fall comes to mind. What doesn't happen in this book is something that causes strife or acknowledges trauma in a meaningful way. We learn almost immediately that Xavier is cool with threesomes, and early in the book there is an opportunity for Ben to be a part of a group with Xavier that is quickly turned down. This seems a prime lesson that Xavier could have encouraged, a couple he enjoyed and trusted should be safe waters for Ben. That would have been a great turning point moment in any number of ways for the story. But no chances like this are taken.

Instead, the writing duo lean into the "things I won't say" trope where neither guy will tell the other what they are thinking/feeling for the other in the moment. The big issue that leads to the end of the story again had such potential that was left to meander. The authors are also very repetitive in character action. I mentioned before how Xavier clenches his jaw, balls his fists in anger, they also both let their mind wander and have to be called out for it - often by the other guy saying something like, don't go there, or where have you gone. The lack of creativity and repetition of actions leaves this story wanting. No excuse for this pair to lean so heavily into sex, without bothering for actual breakthrough sex. I feel that a lot of these authors crank out so many titles that they simply don't care what words end up on the page. They certainly didn't try very hard here. Both authors are now on my hesitant to buy list. Dawn, aka Riley Hart has had a streak of absolute crap as of late, Lee has been hit or miss. I don't recommend this title.

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