
Love in a F*cked-Up World
How to Build Relationships, Hook Up, and Raise Hell, Together
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Narrated by:
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Dean Spade
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By:
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Dean Spade
About this listen
In this inspiring self-help handbook, a trans activist dares us to be the change we want to see—both out in the world, and amongst our closest connections.
Lifelong activist and educator Dean Spade dares us to decide that our interpersonal actions are not separate from our politics of liberation and resistance. Many activist projects and resistance groups fall apart because people treat each other poorly, trying desperately to live out the cultural myths about dating and relationships that we are fed from an early age.
How do we divest from the idea that one romantic partner will be the solution to all our problems? How do we bring our best thinking about freedom and justice into step with our desires for healing and connection?
Love in a F*cked-Up World is a resounding call to action and a practical manifesto for how to combat cultural scripts and take our relationships into our own hands, preparing us for the work of changing the world.
PLEASE NOTE: When you purchase this title, the accompanying PDF will be available in your Audible Library along with the audio.
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Critic reviews
"Compassionate, clarifying, and profoundly wise, Love in a F*cked Up World is radical leftist thought leader Dean Spade's latest gift to anyone interested in the intersection of love and justice... In this clear and highly practical book, Spade offers an enormously helpful map for creating relationships—whether friendly, sexual, and/or romantic—that feed and strengthen not only the individuals involved, but their communities and social commitments as well... This is the book I desperately needed when I first joined social justice movements as a teenager, and I am so very grateful that activists of all ages may read it now."—Kai Cheng Thom, author of Falling Back in Love with Being Human: Letters to Lost Souls
“Dean Spade has written a pragmatic, timely book to help us navigate our most intimate relationships with a collective mindset; release romance myths and approach love as a practice; and cultivate discernment and freedom where we are trained towards judgement and ownership. He teaches us with gentle, relatable clarity and questions that allow us to reflect on how we are loving each other in this f--ked up gorgeous world, and how to hold on to each other as the changes come.”—adrienne maree brown, author of Loving Corrections, Pleasure Activism, and Emergent Strategy
"Spade outlines how the systems we currently have in place are not set up to meet people’s needs—as we’ve seen highlighted by last year’s major global disruption."—Maria Ricapito, Marie Claire
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Story
Systemic Shame is the socially engineered self-loathing that says we are solely to blame for our circumstances. It teaches that our consumption is moral and personal choice is our only tool of change. Systemic Shame tells us that poverty is remedied by hard-working people pulling themselves up by their bootstraps, that marginalized people are responsible for their own oppression, and that massive global crises like climate change can be solved by switching to paper straws. When we inevitably blame ourselves for failing to do enough to combat structural injustices, we feel Systemic Shame.
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not about shame
- By Anonymous User on 06-15-24
By: Devon Price PhD
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Stag Dance
- A Novel & Stories
- By: Torrey Peters
- Narrated by: Lee Osorio, Briggon Snow, Eileen Noonan, and others
- Length: 9 hrs and 6 mins
- Unabridged
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In Stag Dance, the titular novel, a group of restless lumberjacks working in an illegal winter logging outfit plan a dance that some of them will volunteer to attend as women. When the broadest, strongest, plainest of the axmen announces his intention to dance as a woman, he finds himself caught in a strange rivalry with a pretty young jack, provoking a cascade of obsession, jealousy, and betrayal that will culminate on the big night in an astonishing vision of gender and transition.
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Cringy and Beautiful
- By Stella G. Schwartz on 04-23-25
By: Torrey Peters
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White Noise
- By: Audible Sleep
- Narrated by: Audible Sleep
- Length: 12 hrs
- Original Recording
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Tune out the world and unwind at the end of a long day with white noise. White noise can promote relaxation and improve sleep quality by blocking external noise, and this 12-hour track is designed to support your sleep overnight.
By: Audible Sleep
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Never Chase Men Again
- 38 Dating Secrets to Get the Guy, Keep Him Interested, and Prevent Dead-End Relationships
- By: Bruce Bryans
- Narrated by: Dan Culhane
- Length: 2 hrs and 9 mins
- Unabridged
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If a man doesn't take you seriously, he may feel compelled to have a good time with you. Unfortunately this good time will last until you finally realize you're being taken for a ride or until Mr. Time Waster ultimately moves on to a woman he REALLY wants. In cases like this, what a woman really requires are two things: a healthy amount of self-respect and a set of "player-proof" dating rules that will allow her to make wise dating decisions.
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Definitely eyeopening
- By C.DUB on 09-04-15
By: Bruce Bryans
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Matters of the Heart
- Healing Your Relationship with Yourself and Those You Love
- By: Thema Bryant PhD
- Narrated by: Thema Bryant PhD
- Length: 8 hrs and 9 mins
- Unabridged
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As a psychologist and minister with more than twenty years of experience, Dr. Thema understands how challenging it can be to create and cultivate healthy relationships—and how critical it is for our well-being. Matters of the Heart draws on the wisdom of science, sacredness, and lived experience to help listeners tend to the garden of their hearts and build their best relational lives.
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All Aspects of the Heart
- By Ashley61410 on 04-29-25
By: Thema Bryant PhD
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The Serviceberry
- By: Robin Wall Kimmerer
- Narrated by: Robin Wall Kimmerer
- Length: 1 hr and 56 mins
- Unabridged
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As Indigenous scientist and author of Braiding Sweetgrass Robin Wall Kimmerer harvests serviceberries alongside the birds, she considers the ethic of reciprocity that lies at the heart of the gift economy. How, she asks, can we learn from Indigenous wisdom and the plant world to reimagine what we value most? Our economy is rooted in scarcity, competition, and the hoarding of resources, and we have surrendered our values to a system that actively harms what we love. Meanwhile, the serviceberry’s relationship with the natural world is an embodiment of reciprocity.
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Engaging and optimistic
- By Steve on 12-18-24
very good!
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Great book
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