Modern Romance
An Investigation
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Narrated by:
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Aziz Ansari
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Eric Klinenberg
About this listen
The number one New York Times best seller.
A hilarious, thoughtful, and in-depth exploration of the pleasures and perils of modern romance from Aziz Ansari, the star of Master of None and one of this generation’s sharpest comedic voices.
At some point, every one of us embarks on a journey to find love. We meet people, date, get into and out of relationships, all with the hope of finding someone with whom we share a deep connection. This seems standard now, but it’s wildly different from what people did even just decades ago. Single people today have more romantic options than at any point in human history. With technology, our abilities to connect with and sort through these options are staggering. So why are so many people frustrated?
Some of our problems are unique to our time. “Why did this guy just text me an emoji of a pizza?”, “Should I go out with this girl even though she listed Combos as one of her favorite snack foods? Combos?!”, “My girlfriend just got a message from some dude named Nathan. Who’s Nathan? Did he just send her a photo of his penis? Should I check just to be sure?”.
But the transformation of our romantic lives can’t be explained by technology alone. In a short period of time, the whole culture of finding love has changed dramatically. A few decades ago, people would find a decent person who lived in their neighborhood. Their families would meet and, after deciding neither party seemed like a murderer, they would get married and soon have a kid, all by the time they were 24. Today, people marry later than ever and spend years of their lives on a quest to find the perfect person, a soul mate.
For years, Aziz Ansari has been aiming his comic insight at modern romance, but for Modern Romance, the book, he decided he needed to take things to another level. He teamed up with NYU sociologist Eric Klinenberg and designed a massive research project, including hundreds of interviews and focus groups conducted everywhere from Tokyo to Buenos Aires to Wichita. They analyzed behavioral data and surveys and created their own online research forum on Reddit, which drew thousands of messages. They enlisted the world’s leading social scientists, including Andrew Cherlin, Eli Finkel, Helen Fisher, Sheena Iyengar, Barry Schwartz, Sherry Turkle, and Robb Willer. The result is unlike any social science or humor book we’ve seen before.
In Modern Romance, Ansari combines his irreverent humor with cutting-edge social science to give us an unforgettable tour of our new romantic world.
©2015 Aziz Ansari (P)2015 Penguin AudioListeners also enjoyed...
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Critic reviews
“An engaging look at the often head-scratching, frequently infuriating mating behaviors that shape our love lives.” (Refinery 29)
"With topics like online dating apps to serious social science research, the book is sure to have you laughing if not taking a few notes." (USA Today)
"Entertaining and illuminating." (The Guardian)
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- Narrated by: Kevin Free
- Length: 7 hrs and 6 mins
- Unabridged
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New York Times best-selling, award-winning author, actor, and motivational speaker Hill Harper invites listeners to join the conversation about the breakdown of the African-American family. The black community of past generations found strength in families, but today’s black children have less than a one in three chance of being raised in a two-parent household. Harper’s search for answers to this phenomenon is an enlightening and empowering journey.
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~*AWESOME*~
- By Nevada on 08-13-10
By: Harper Hill
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Was It Something I Said
- The Answer to All Your Dating Dilemmas
- By: Jess McCann
- Narrated by: Julia Farhat
- Length: 7 hrs and 2 mins
- Unabridged
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It's not unusual for Jess McCann to receive a frantic late-night call from one of her clients, asking for advice while out on a date. And every single girl knows the frustration of saying the wrong thing at the wrong time and wishing she could take it back and say something better. Well, now you can get it right the first time around with McCann's indispensable dating survival guide.
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Not as good as "You lost him at hello"
- By Lorenza on 11-23-15
By: Jess McCann
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The Dating Manifesto
- A Drama-Free Plan for Pursuing Marriage with Purpose
- By: Lisa Anderson
- Narrated by: Jaimee Draper
- Length: 5 hrs and 51 mins
- Unabridged
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Face it, your attitudes about marriage and the path to marriage are probably wrong. Some you've inherited, some you've simply bought - hook, line, and sinker - and some you've made up yourself. They have translated into bad action (or no action) in dating and relationships. But it's not too late; you can break the cycle of dating dysfunction and learn to honor marriage, marry well, and live intentionally while you wait.
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Modern and biblical
- By Ian on 08-12-15
By: Lisa Anderson
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Labor of Love
- The Invention of Dating
- By: Moira Weigel
- Narrated by: Kyra Miller
- Length: 8 hrs and 48 mins
- Unabridged
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Weaving together over 100 years of history with scenes from the contemporary landscape, Labor of Love offers a fresh feminist perspective on how we came to date the ways we do. This isn't a guide to "getting the guy". There are no ridiculous "rules" to follow. Instead Weigel helps us understand how looking for love shapes who we are and hopefully leads us closer to the happy ending that dating promises.
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Not Meant To Be Useful, But Quite Fun
- By Gillian on 02-14-17
By: Moira Weigel
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Unhooked
- How Young Women Pursue Sex, Delay Love, and Lose at Both
- By: Laura Sessions Stepp
- Narrated by: Ellen Archer
- Length: 9 hrs and 9 mins
- Unabridged
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Here's an eye-opening examination of the "hookup" culture, seen through the experiences of high-school- and college-age women who confront the hard lessons of dating, love, and sex. Stepp follows three groups of young women and comes away with some disturbing insights. Relationships and romance are seen as messy and time-consuming, and love is postponed or, worse, seen as impossible. Many young women can't handle this, and they're being battered physically and emotionally by the new dating landscape.
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Essential Reading for Parents
- By Elton on 04-19-07
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The Secret Lives of Introverts
- Inside Our Hidden World
- By: Jenn Granneman
- Narrated by: Susie Berneis
- Length: 7 hrs and 51 mins
- Unabridged
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Is there a hidden part of you that no one else sees? Do you have a vivid inner world of thoughts and emotions that your peers and loved ones can't seem to access? Have you ever been told you're too quiet, shy, boring, or awkward? Are your habits and comfort zones questioned by a society that doesn't seem to get you? If so, you might be an introvert. On behalf of those who have long been misunderstood, rejected, or ignored, fellow introvert Jenn Granneman writes a compassionate vindication.
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Unnecessary voices
- By Adrienne Warg on 09-13-19
By: Jenn Granneman
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You Lost Him at Hello
- From Dating to 'I Do': Secret Strategies from One of America’s Top Dating Coaches
- By: Jess McCann
- Narrated by: Julia Farhat
- Length: 7 hrs and 35 mins
- Unabridged
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She used to make the same mistakes we've all made with men - until she realized that the winning formula to attracting the right guy lay in skills she already had. As a successful saleswoman, Jess has practiced the techniques in promoting a product, finding the right approach, making the pitch, and closing deal after deal. Once she started to apply these same techniques to the dating scene, her love life made a complete 180, and she found herself with more interested men than she knew what to do with.
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great book
- By Barbara on 04-24-13
By: Jess McCann
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The Natural
- How to Effortlessly Attract the Women You Want
- By: Richard La Ruina
- Narrated by: Steve West
- Length: 5 hrs and 34 mins
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Whether you're looking to play the field or meet that one special girl, world-renowned pickup artist Richard La Ruina has got you covered. In The Natural, he reveals his blueprint for attracting and keeping the kinds of women most men only dream of. It doesn't matter what you look like or how much you make; when you use these methods, it's a whole new game - and you have the unfair advantage.
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mystery method or the game for dummies.
- By Anonymous User on 06-17-18
By: Richard La Ruina
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For Men Only (Revised and Updated Edition)
- A Straightforward Guide to the Inner Lives of Women
- By: Shaunti Feldhahn, Jeff Feldhahn
- Narrated by: Jeff Feldhahn
- Length: 3 hrs and 22 mins
- Unabridged
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Finally, you can understand her! If you're like most men, you've burned up lots of energy trying to figure out what a woman wants, what makes her tick, and how to make her happy. The good news: success is simpler than you thought. In their groundbreaking classic, For Men Only, Shaunti and Jeff Feldhahn reveal the eye opening truths and simple acts that will radically improve your relationship with the woman you love.
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Really helpfull!
- By kristie bento on 03-18-15
By: Shaunti Feldhahn, and others
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Love Understood
- The Science of Who, How and Why We Love
- By: Laura Mucha
- Narrated by: Laura Mucha
- Length: 10 hrs and 35 mins
- Unabridged
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Poets, philosophers and artists have been trying to explain romantic love for centuries, but it remains one of the most complex and intimidating terrains to navigate. Most people are afraid to be open and honest about their relationships...until now. For Love Understood, Laura Mucha has interviewed hundreds of strangers, from the ages of 8 to 95 in more than 40 countries, asking them to share their most personal stories, feelings and insights about love.
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Insightful, informative, and thought provoking
- By James on 03-05-19
By: Laura Mucha
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For Young Men Only
- A Guys Guide to the Alien Gender
- By: Jeff Feldhahn, Eric Rice
- Narrated by: Kelly Ryan Dolan
- Length: 3 hrs and 42 mins
- Unabridged
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Based on a national survey of hundreds of teenage girls, Jeff Feldhahn and Eric Rice give young men insight into the hearts and minds of teen girls while opening the way to healthier relationships between guys and girls, both now and in their future.
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A must read for every young man
- By Jens W. Skov on 12-11-19
By: Jeff Feldhahn, and others
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For Young Women Only
- What You Need to Know About How Guys Think
- By: Shaunti Feldhahn, Lisa Author Rice
- Narrated by: Shaunti Feldhahn
- Length: 3 hrs and 17 mins
- Unabridged
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Why are guys so weird? Unravel the mystery. A national scientific survey and in-depth personal interviews give you an unprecedented look inside the teenage male mind. Discover how: He'd be perfectly fine if he was loved by few and hated by many as long as he was respected by all. His ego is the size of Africa (but so are his insecurities). He hides his real feelings under a tough exterior.
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For Christians
- By R. Burdick on 07-18-09
By: Shaunti Feldhahn, and others
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The Game of Desire
- 5 Surprising Secrets to Dating with Dominance - and Getting What You Want
- By: Shannon Boodram
- Narrated by: Shannon Boodram
- Length: 7 hrs and 50 mins
- Unabridged
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For younger generations, dating is a complicated mystery. Apps like Tinder and Bumble are supposed to foster connection but instead serve as a reminder of how painfully single we are. Certified sexologist and intimacy coach Shan Boodram - the most sought-after sex educator on the internet - is about to change all that. In this essential how-to guide, she addresses the realities of life today - when the rules of love and attraction are fluid - and teaches a group of young women how to become master daters in just 60 days.
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Hey it’s me...you
- By Shan Boody on 09-25-19
By: Shannon Boodram
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The End of Men
- And the Rise of Women
- By: Hanna Rosin
- Narrated by: Laural Merlington
- Length: 9 hrs and 1 min
- Unabridged
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Men have been the dominant sex since - well, the dawn of mankind. And yet, as journalist Hanna Rosin discovered, that long-held truth is no longer true. At this unprecedented moment, women are no longer merely gaining on men; they have pulled decisively ahead by almost every measure. Already "the end of men" - the phrase Rosin coined - has entered the lexicon as indelibly as Simone de Beauvoir’s "second sex", Betty Friedan’s "feminine mystique", Susan Faludi’s "backlash", and Naomi Wolf’s "beauty myth" have.
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Great book, don't care for the reader's style
- By Darren on 12-05-12
By: Hanna Rosin
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What listeners say about Modern Romance
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- Anthony
- 08-18-15
Brilliant Audiobook.....
This is not just a bio of Aziz, but a wonderful book about Modern Romance in today's culture!!!
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2 people found this helpful
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- Amazon Customer
- 09-24-19
Insightful and Educational
I found this book to be really helpful and have a witty commentary regarding dating in the age of social media. I enjoyed that it was co written with a sociologist and stated statistics.
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1 person found this helpful
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- maddlibs
- 02-28-19
very good insight #tacos
I really enjoy the brown man's voice and comedy. this is a book I would not listen to normally. but I like Aziz is comedy so I looked to see if you had a book this will popped up. did not give me much hope for the future of my sex life being married for 15 years. But it is interesting to me to see how young dudes now a days are kinda pusses when it comes to dating. Well have fun with it.
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- Amazon Customer
- 09-27-18
Huge help for class assignment!!!!
This book I have to read for a Sociology class. It was taking me too long to read so a huge thanks to Audible for making this title available!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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- Brockton
- 01-04-19
Grateful I read it
Aziz was great. Before I read this book and as a young single trying to date in this digital world, I put the blame of troubled dating on everyone but myself. Though much of it is out my control, his insight and experiments made me realize all the things I do that impede relationships from developing. Refreshing and funny. Personal and real.
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- Brandon Smith
- 12-22-16
Interesting and Entertaining
If you're like me and you don't understand how people could ask each other out and break up over text message, then you'll find this book interesting. It explores some of the generational, technological, and cultural differences of dating and relationships. Lots of interesting facts and I love how Aziz reads his book in a casual and entertaining manner. The audiobook version has exclusive parts that aren't in the other formats, like how he calls us listeners lazy for not even reading the book. Good stuff!
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- cjraulli
- 08-28-17
Amazing
Aziz Ansari does an amazing job explaining how modern romance works is this technological age. it was well written and insightful and it is worth every second of reading and/or listening.
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- AGreatTrik
- 07-14-15
An intellectual Stand Up Performance
If you love Aziz's stand up you will love this audible. Even if you do not love his stand up you will still find this very enjoyable.
Very inciteful with Aziz's charisma and humor. He does take the topic seriously however. Think of his stand up as ice cream. The jokes are the actual ice cream and with interesting facts being sprinkled on. However the audiobook is the exact opposite with the interesting facts being the primary focus and the jokes sprinkled
In.
Very well done
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- Cristina
- 08-20-15
Well written and narrated
This book was amazingly insightful and funny! Aziz's narration could not have been better. It's easy to tell that he put some serious time and effort into writing this book and I highly recommend it to anyone.
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- Peabodywork
- 02-08-16
Mind opening, funny, enlightening
I understand why and what I have to do to win at this game. They did a great job at how modern day romance is conducted. Insight on both male and female prospective was very helpful and much more.
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