
Relinquished
The Politics of Adoption and the Privilege of American Motherhood
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By:
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Gretchen Sisson
About this listen
FINALIST, NONFICTION, NATIONAL BOOK CRITICS CIRCLE AWARDS, 2024
FINALIST, 2024 GODDARD RIVERSIDE STEPHAN RUSSO BOOK PRIZE FOR SOCIAL JUSTICE
"Essential reading."—NPR “Books We Love”
“Dares to imagine a different world where Americans treat adoption like the justice issue it is.”―Washington Post
“Impressively reported…[Sisson] uses her deep well of knowledge to make the case that adoption is no solution for Americans’ reduced access to abortion.”―San Francisco Chronicle
A powerful decade-long study of adoption in the age of Roe, revealing the grief of the American mothers for whom the choice to parent was never real
Adoption has always been viewed as a beloved institution for building families, as well as a mutually agreeable common ground in the abortion debate, but little attention has been paid to the lives of mothers who relinquish infants for private adoption. Relinquished reveals adoption to be a path of constrained choice for those for whom abortion is inaccessible, or for whom parenthood is untenable. The stories of relinquishing mothers are stories about our country's refusal to care for families at the most basic level, and to instead embrace an individual, private solution to a large-scale, social problem.
With the recent decision in Dobbs v. Jackson Women's Health Organization revoking abortion protections, we are in a political moment in which adoption is, increasingly, being revealed as an institution devoted to separating families and policing parenthood under the guise of feel-good family-building. Rooted in a long-term study, Relinquished features the in-depth testimonies of American mothers who placed their children for domestic adoption. The voices of these women are powerful and heartrending; they deserve to be heard.
©2024 Gretchen Sisson (P)2024 Macmillan AudioListeners also enjoyed...
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Critic reviews
“A timely book in the wake of the overturning of Roe v. Wade.”—One of the best nonfiction books of 2024, Paste Magazine
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"Provocative, in-depth, and scholarly. For readers interested in the history of adoption."—Library Journal
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- Length: 7 hrs and 46 mins
- Unabridged
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Adoption is often framed by happy narratives, but the reality is that many adoptees struggle with unaddressed trauma and issues of identity and belonging. Adoptees often spend the majority of their youth without the language to explore the grief related to adoption or the permission to legitimize their conflicting emotions. Adoptee and counselor Cameron Lee Small names the realities of the adoptee's journey, narrating his own and other adoptees' stories in all their complexity.
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A Hopeful Heartbreak
- By bri on 03-11-25
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The Child Catchers
- Rescue, Trafficking, and the New Gospel of Adoption
- By: Kathryn Joyce
- Narrated by: Joyce Feurring
- Length: 17 hrs and 1 min
- Unabridged
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The Child Catchers is a shocking exposé of what the adoption industry has become and how it got there, told through deep investigative reporting and the heartbreaking stories of individuals who became collateral damage in a market driven by profit and, now, pulpit command. Anyone who seeks to adopt - of whatever faith or no faith, and however well-meaning - is affected by the evangelical adoption movement, whether they know it or not. Joyce reveals with great sensitivity and empathy why, if we truly care for children, we need to see more clearly.
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Throw the baby out with the bath water.
- By A. Young on 04-28-16
By: Kathryn Joyce
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Twenty Things Adopted Kids Wish Their Adoptive Parents Knew
- By: Sherrie Eldridge
- Narrated by: Rosemary Benson
- Length: 6 hrs and 58 mins
- Unabridged
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The voices of adopted children are poignant, questioning. And they tell a familiar story of loss, fear, and hope. This extraordinary book, written by a woman who was adopted herself, gives voice to children's unspoken concerns, and shows adoptive parents how to free their kids from feelings of fear, abandonment, and shame. With warmth and candor, Sherrie Eldridge reveals the 20 complex emotional issues you must understand to nurture the child you love.
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The glass is half empty.
- By stephen blackwell on 07-19-24
By: Sherrie Eldridge
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The Adoptive Parents' Handbook
- A Guide to Healing Trauma and Thriving with Your Foster or Adopted Child
- By: Barbara Tantrum, Deborah Gray MPA LICSW - foreword
- Narrated by: Janina Edwards
- Length: 10 hrs and 8 mins
- Unabridged
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Children who have been adopted and/or shuttled through the foster-care system experience trauma at a much higher rate than other kids, which can make it difficult for them to trust, relax, regulate their emotions, and connect with their new families. As a parent, learning how to heal attachment trauma, attune to your child's needs, identify triggers, and create felt safety is essential to providing the loving, supportive, and stable home they need to thrive. Written for parents of adopted and foster kids of all ages, this book offers resources for handling common concerns.
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Highly Recommend!!!
- By Alexandra Borman on 11-16-21
By: Barbara Tantrum, and others
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The Connected Child
- Bring Hope and Healing to Your Adoptive Family
- By: Karyn B. Purvis, David R. Cross, Wendy Lyons Sunshine
- Narrated by: Anna Crowe
- Length: 6 hrs and 49 mins
- Unabridged
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The adoption of a child is always a joyous moment in the life of a family. Some adoptions, though, present unique challenges. Welcoming these children into your family - and addressing their special needs - requires care, consideration, and compassion.
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Incredibly helpful
- By Amazon Customer on 08-12-21
By: Karyn B. Purvis, and others
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Confessions of an Adoptive Parent
- Hope and Help from the Trenches of Foster Care and Adoption
- By: Mike Berry
- Narrated by: Lloyd James
- Length: 5 hrs and 47 mins
- Unabridged
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Adopting or fostering a child brings its own unique set of challenges only another parent facing the same uphill climb could possibly understand. From parenting children with traumatic pasts, to dealing with attachment issues, to raising a children with special needs, it can sometimes be a struggle just getting through the day. Mike Berry knows the loneliness and isolation you can easily feel in your particular parenting role - because he's been there.
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This book is total garbage; Would not recommend.
- By Kevin on 02-22-19
By: Mike Berry
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Cloistered
- My Years as a Nun
- By: Catherine Coldstream
- Narrated by: Catherine Coldstream
- Length: 11 hrs and 23 mins
- Unabridged
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Cloistered takes the listener deep into the hidden world of a traditional Carmelite monastery as it approaches the third Millennium and tells the story of an intense personal journey into and out of an enclosed life of poverty, chastity, and obedience. Finding an apparently perfect world at Akenside Priory, in Northumberland, Catherine trusts herself to a group of twenty silent women, believing she is trusting herself to God. As the beauty and mystery of an ancient way of life enfold her, she surrenders herself wholly to its power, quite unaware of the complexity and dangers that lie ahead.
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Poignant tale
- By sk arthur on 04-25-25
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Broken
- Transforming Child Protective Services—Notes of a Former Caseworker
- By: Jessica Pryce
- Narrated by: Deanna Anthony
- Length: 8 hrs and 10 mins
- Unabridged
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Joining the ranks of Evicted and The New Jim Crow, a former caseworker’s searing, clear-eyed investigation of the child welfare system—from foster care to incarceration—that exposes the deep-rooted biases shaping the system, witnessed through the lives of several Black families.
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Loved This Book, I Finished It Within 24 Hours.
- By Dez on 01-18-25
By: Jessica Pryce
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What White Parents Should Know About Transracial Adoption
- An Adoptee's Perspective on Its History, Nuances, and Practices
- By: Melissa Guida-Richards, Paula Guida - foreword
- Narrated by: Stacy Gonzalez
- Length: 6 hrs and 39 mins
- Unabridged
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If you're the White parent of a transracially or internationally adopted child, you may have been told that if you try your best and work your hardest, good intentions and a whole lot of love will be enough to give your child the security, attachment, and nurturing family life they need to thrive. The only problem? It's not true. What White Parents Need to Know About Transracial Adoption breaks down the dynamics that frequently fly under the radar of the whitewashed, happily-ever-after adoption stories we hear so often.
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This is a rant. Not an informative book.
- By Chris on 07-10-22
By: Melissa Guida-Richards, and others
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You Could Make This Place Beautiful
- A Memoir
- By: Maggie Smith
- Narrated by: Maggie Smith
- Length: 7 hrs and 48 mins
- Unabridged
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In her memoir You Could Make This Place Beautiful, poet Maggie Smith explores the disintegration of her marriage and her renewed commitment to herself in lyrical vignettes that shine, hard and clear as jewels. The book begins with one woman’s personal, particular heartbreak, but its circles widen into a reckoning with contemporary womanhood, traditional gender roles, and the power dynamics that persist even in many progressive homes.
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Beautiful, relatable, profound
- By Betty Blue on 04-16-23
By: Maggie Smith
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Invisible Rulers
- The People Who Turn Lies into Reality
- By: Renee DiResta
- Narrated by: Anna Caputo
- Length: 15 hrs
- Unabridged
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Renée DiResta’s powerful, original investigation into the way power and influence have been profoundly transformed reveals how a virtual rumor mill of niche propagandists increasingly shapes public opinion. While propagandists position themselves as trustworthy Davids, their reach, influence, and economics make them classic Goliaths—invisible rulers who create bespoke realities to revolutionize politics, culture, and society. Their work is driven by a simple maxim: if you make it trend, you make it true.
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the more things change...
- By Gina S. on 07-01-24
By: Renee DiResta
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Adoption Healing
- ...A Path to Recovery
- By: Joe Soll
- Narrated by: Elan O'Connor
- Length: 7 hrs and 43 mins
- Unabridged
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In this unique book, the reader is provided with a description of the unfolding of the adoptee's personality from birth, detailing each developmental milestone along the way, followed by different methods of healing the adoptee's wounds, including inner child work, visualizations, healing affirmations, and anger management. Every chapter includes a Myths and Realities of adoption section, a summary of the chapter and exercises to do one's own.
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Great book
- By April on 09-20-16
By: Joe Soll
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The Connected Parent
- Real-Life Strategies for Building Trust and Attachment
- By: Lisa Qualls, Karyn Purvis PhD
- Narrated by: Lisa Qualls
- Length: 4 hrs and 42 mins
- Unabridged
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Renowned child-development expert Dr. Karyn Purvis gives you practical advice and powerful tools you can use to encourage secure attachment in your family. You will benefit from Karyn’s decades of clinical research and real-world experience. Coauthor Lisa Qualls demonstrates how you can successfully implement these strategies in your home, just as she did in hers. You will learn how to simplify your approach using scripts, nurture your child, combat chronic fear, teach respect, and develop other valuable tools to facilitate a healing connection with your child.
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An holistic approach to relational health
- By K & J on 02-11-23
By: Lisa Qualls, and others
What listeners say about Relinquished
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Kelly B.
- 11-13-24
different take on adoption
very thoughtful and well articulated. definitely gave me a new perspective on adoption as a whole
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- Alysa B.
- 04-02-24
Wish I would have just bought a hard copy
As a birth mother, I was so excited about this book as it touches on some pretty weighty topics, some quite sensitive to me as my child that I placed is now in his 20's. But I really don't like the way this book is read!! I feel like her opinion comes through in her tone and frankly, if you know any birth mothers personally, placing a child for adoption can be VERY coerced and manipulated because of people's opinions. I just wanted a book that I could listen to, gather my own thoughts and opinions, and gain insight into myself and others affected by adoption. Probably going to just buy the book because I am enjoying the books content, just not the reader.
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- Ande Scott
- 03-25-24
Important information presented in an easy to understand manner
Nice to finally hear such a well researched longitudinal study of the modern treatment of pregnant people in crisis by a predatory industry.
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- John Carroll
- 05-16-24
Relinquished
I liked the the actual portrayal of birth mothers. They don't get enough press.
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- NV
- 04-17-24
Relatable
I am a 2010 first mom, and WOW… this validated me in so many ways. Knowing I was not the only one who had an adoption go down like my daughters. Very healing to read. Though sometimes triggering. Reality can be a hard thing ti accept.
Grateful for the work Gretchen has put in to give accurate information to the world.
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- Loren
- 12-04-24
Where are the narratives from adopted people?
Plenty of perspectives on birth parents but little to no discussion on the impact of open adoptions on adopted people
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- Ted
- 03-14-24
Women’s Experiences
Excellent critical analysis of the adoption industry’s impact on women. As well as how it intersects with women’s choices or lack of choices in the US. I found it very timely and useful as an adoptee, birth mother and adoption professional. I learned from this and also felt very validated in my own conflicts and concerns about adoption.
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- tessa raphael
- 06-20-24
Deeply moving and well researched
Thank you Gretchen for your work. So Illuminating, intellectually challenging, and heartfelt. Should be required reading in modern feminist courses
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- Elie G
- 04-16-25
A Real Look at the Impacts of Adoption in America
The statistics/data, testimonials, both sides of the story and the obvious lean towards the downfalls if adoption even with the positives.
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