STFU
The Power of Keeping Your Mouth Shut in an Endlessly Noisy World
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Narrated by:
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Dan Lyons
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By:
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Dan Lyons
About this listen
This program is read by the author.
"Lyons is an able narrator who brings self-deprecation and humor to parts that may lose their impact in print. His emphatic delivery is dynamic, and listeners may find themselves nodding along in agreement."—Library Journal
New York Times bestselling author Dan Lyons is here to tell you—and don't take this the wrong way—that you really need to shut the f*ck up!
Our noisy world has trained us to think that those who get in the last word win, when in fact it’s those who know how to stay silent who really hold the power. STFU is a book that unlocks this power and will change your life, freeing you to focus on what matters. Lyons combines leading behavioral science with actionable advice on how to communicate with intent, think critically, and open your mind and ears to the world around you.
Talk less, get more. That’s what STFU is all about. Prescriptive, informative, and addictively readable, STFU gives you the tools to become your better self, whether that’s in the office, at home, online, or in your most treasured relationships. Because, after all, what you say is who you are.
So take a deep breath, press play, and quietly change your life.
A Macmillan Audio production from Henry Holt & Company.
PLEASE NOTE: When you purchase this title, the accompanying PDF will be available in your Audible Library along with the audio.
©2023 Dan Lyons (P)2023 Macmillan AudioListeners also enjoyed...
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Critic reviews
“Entertaining, illuminating, and inspiring! More than a book, it’s a public service announcement that we’d all do well to—well, STFU and listen to!”—Sarah Knight, New York Times bestselling author of Calm the F*ck Down
“Read this book--your boss will thank you. Your spouse will thank you. And you'll thank yourself! Good communication is measured not by the speaker, but by the listener. How can you know what's going on in another person's ear? Start by STFU! For most of us, that's easier said than done. Dan Lyons will explain how to do it, and why it will improve your relationships at work and at home.”—Kim Scott, New York Times bestselling author of Radical Candor
“STFU convinced me that, by keeping my big mouth shut, I will be happier and more productive and so will everyone else in my life. Dan Lyons' ridiculously funny gem taught me how to shut up, pay fierce attention to others, stifle my 'manalogues' and so many more antidotes for my talkaholic tendencies. My only problem is that, after reading STFU, I can’t stop talking about how much I love this book!”—Robert I. Sutton, organizational psychologist, Stanford Professor, and New York Times bestselling author of seven books including The No Asshole Rule
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Another outstanding social psychology book!
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By: John Tierney, and others
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Do Nothing
- How to Break Away from Overworking, Overdoing, and Underliving
- By: Celeste Headlee
- Narrated by: Celeste Headlee
- Length: 7 hrs and 41 mins
- Unabridged
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In Do Nothing, award-winning journalist Celeste Headlee illuminates a new path ahead, seeking to institute a global shift in our thinking so we can stop sabotaging our well-being, put work aside, and start living instead of doing. As it turns out, we’re searching for external solutions to an internal problem. We won’t find what we’re searching for in punishing diets, productivity apps, or the latest self-improvement schemes. Yet all is not lost - we just need to learn how to take time for ourselves, without agenda or profit, and redefine what is truly worthwhile.
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I almost never leave reviews
- By keli wolfe on 03-03-22
By: Celeste Headlee
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The Power of Nice
- How to Conquer the Business World with Kindness
- By: Linda Kaplan Thaler, Robin Koval
- Narrated by: Linda Kaplan Thaler, Robin Koval
- Length: 2 hrs and 58 mins
- Unabridged
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Linda Kaplan Thaler and Robin Koval have moved to the top of the advertising industry by following a simple but powerful philosophy: it pays to be nice. While so many companies encourage a dog-eat-dog mentality, The Kaplan Thaler Group has succeeded through chocolate and flowers.
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For selected audiences
- By Coach Brock on 10-15-07
By: Linda Kaplan Thaler, and others
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Surrounded by Idiots
- The Four Types of Human Behavior and How to Effectively Communicate with Each in Business (and in Life)
- By: Thomas Erikson
- Narrated by: David John
- Length: 10 hrs and 47 mins
- Unabridged
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Author Thomas Erikson explains that there are four key behavior types that define how we interact with and perceive the people around us. Understanding someone’s pattern of behavior is the key to successful communication. Erikson breaks down the four kinds of behavior types - Reds who are dominant and commanding, Yellows who are social and optimistic, Greens who are laid-back and friendly, and Blues who are analytical and precise - and explains how to identify and interact with each type of person.
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Should be titled "why I hate reds"
- By Dave on 08-24-20
By: Thomas Erikson
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The Introvert's Way
- Living a Quiet Life in a Noisy World
- By: Sophia Dembling
- Narrated by: Rose Itzcovitz
- Length: 4 hrs and 26 mins
- Unabridged
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This clever and pithy audiobook challenges introverts to take ownership of their personalities...with quiet strength. Sophia Dembling asserts that the introvert’s lifestyle is not "wrong" or lacking, as society or extroverts would have us believe. Through a combination of personal insights and psychology, The Introvert’s Way helps and encourages introverts to embrace their nature, to respect traits they may have been ashamed of and reframe them as assets.
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Common Sense Fluff
- By James on 06-17-15
By: Sophia Dembling
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Your Turn
- How to Be an Adult
- By: Julie Lythcott-Haims
- Narrated by: Julie Lythcott-Haims
- Length: 20 hrs and 21 mins
- Unabridged
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What does it mean to be an adult? In the 20th century, psychologists came up with five markers of adulthood: finish your education, get a job, leave home, marry, and have children. Since then, every generation has been held to those same markers. Yet so much has changed about the world and living in it since that sequence was formulated. All of those markers are choices, and they’re all valid, but any one person’s choices along those lines do not make them more or less an adult.
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Not the book that was advertised
- By M. Rogers on 04-13-21
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Magic Words
- The Science and Secrets Behind Seven Words That Motivate, Engage, and Influence
- By: Tim David
- Narrated by: Walter Dixon
- Length: 3 hrs and 26 mins
- Unabridged
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Years of experience as a magician taught Tim David that real magic is all about words, and the way they influence the minds of the audience. What sets a professional magician apart from an amateur are people skills like communication, influence, and engagement - skills that are also effective in the workplace. By applying seven "magic" words in a business setting, David offers tools for effective and persuasive communication.
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Very essential
- By Gerardo A Dada on 01-21-16
By: Tim David
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Feminist Fight Club
- An Office Survival Manual for a Sexist Workplace
- By: Jessica Bennett
- Narrated by: Jessica Bennett, Bahni Turpin
- Length: 6 hrs and 7 mins
- Unabridged
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Part manual, part manifesto, a humorous yet incisive guide to navigating subtle sexism at work - a Lean In for the Buzzfeed generation that provides real-life career advice and humorous reinforcement for a new generation of professional women. Hard hitting and entertaining, Feminist Fight Club blends personal stories with research, statistics, and no-bullsh*t expert advice.
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Awful in so many ways
- By disudds on 01-21-17
By: Jessica Bennett
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Winging It: Stop Thinking, Start Doing
- Why Action Beats Planning Every Time
- By: Emma Isaacs
- Narrated by: Emma Isaacs
- Length: 6 hrs and 9 mins
- Unabridged
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Women are notorious over-preparers and underestimators when it comes to their own readiness to try something new. But as Emma teaches, what most often holds us back are our own fears, excuses, and doubts. With her revolutionary manifesto, Winging It, Emma shares a rallying cry for all women to “do the things that scare you, build your wealth, make an impact, fail lots, and get up and try again”.
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Good advice
- By Amanda Schmidt on 05-28-21
By: Emma Isaacs
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Crystal Clear Communication
- How to Explain Anything Clearly in Speech or Writing
- By: Gary S Goodman
- Narrated by: Gary S Goodman
- Length: 4 hrs and 18 mins
- Original Recording
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With this program, you'll have the tools, the techniques, and, just as importantly, the unflinching confidence to influence your readers and listeners decisively - both at work and at home.
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Largely Sales-Oriented, and Instantly Usable
- By Troy on 01-26-15
By: Gary S Goodman
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The ADHD Advantage
- What You Thought Was a Diagnosis May Be Your Greatest Strength
- By: Dale Archer MD
- Narrated by: Walter Dixon
- Length: 8 hrs and 46 mins
- Unabridged
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Sharing the stories of highly successful people with ADHD, Dr. Archer offers a vitally important and inspiring new way to recognize ADHD traits in oneself or in one's loved ones, and then leverage them to great advantage - without drugs. As someone who not only has ADHD himself but also has never used medication to treat it, Dr. Archer understands the condition from a unique standpoint.
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This guy doesn't understand ADHD – at all
- By Oliver Nielsen on 02-25-16
By: Dale Archer MD
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Women in Tech
- Take Your Career to the Next Level with Practical Advice and Inspiring Stories
- By: Tarah Wheeler
- Narrated by: Tarah Wheeler
- Length: 7 hrs and 1 min
- Unabridged
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Geared toward women who are considering getting into tech, or those already in a tech job who want to take their career to the next level, this book combines practical career advice and inspiring personal stories from successful female tech professionals Brianna Wu, Angie Chang, Keren Elazari, Katie Cunningham, Miah Johnson, Kristin Toth Smith, and Kamilah Taylor. Written by a female startup CEO and featuring a host of other successful contributors.
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Fantastic, motivating and superb advice!
- By EuropeanCaliGRL on 12-29-17
By: Tarah Wheeler
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Influencer, Second Edition
- The New Science of Leading Change
- By: Joseph Grenny, Kerry Patterson, David Maxfield, and others
- Narrated by: Joseph Grenny
- Length: 8 hrs and 10 mins
- Unabridged
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From the best-selling authors who taught the world how to have Crucial Conversations comes the new edition of Influencer, a thought-provoking book that combines the remarkable insights of behavioral scientists and business leaders with the astonishing stories of high-powered influencers from all walks of life. You'll be taught each and every step of the influence process - including robust strategies for making change inevitable in your personal life, your business, and your world.
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Very enlightening
- By Bryan Rael on 08-23-24
By: Joseph Grenny, and others
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How we fight predicts the future of our relationships. Most of us blunder into conflict without knowing what we are really fighting about and then quickly become overwhelmed by physiological responses we can’t control and emotions we don’t anticipate. The truth is the happiest and most successful couples fight—all the time. Conflict is human, and necessary.
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Healthy boundaries. We all know we should have them - in order to achieve work/life balance, cope with toxic people, and enjoy rewarding relationships with partners, friends, and family. But what do "healthy boundaries" really mean - and how can we successfully express our needs, say "no", and be assertive without offending others? Licensed counselor, sought-after relationship expert, and one of the most influential therapists on Instagram Nedra Glover Tawwab demystifies this complex topic for today's world.
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What listeners say about STFU
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Beverly
- 10-07-23
Extremely helpful
Thank you so very much. This information applied will change my life for the better. It already has. I had bought the idea of having a snappy comeback was the answer but only in a smarter way.
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- Koukla
- 09-01-24
easy to follow
necessary book for better relationships and for our inner growth and more importantly our peace
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- Trevor Mark
- 04-03-23
Interesting concept
Worth a listen with interesting points and a fascinating take on communication. Good presentation from the author. Too many woke political references.
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- TMT
- 09-04-24
How Did You Know Me (LOL)
I believe this may be a learned behavior. Nevertheless, I'm doing my best to UNLEARN it and just S.T.F.U.! My husband, friends, and I thank you for saying what should have been said in a funny but necessary way a long time ago. It would have saved me a lot of drama a long time ago. Although well intentioned, my comments are just not the point. S.T.F.U!!!!!!
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- James L. Hamilton
- 07-17-23
Listening deserves this book
Debra Hamilton
As a mediator of conflicts between people over animals every page of this book provided me with incredible tools to be a better active listener. Dan I love you. ❤️🐕🦜🐈🐎
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- Mom in MI
- 07-08-23
This book was incredibly helpful to me
I hesitated on listening to this book because of many of the reviews. This is the only book I've been able to find on overtalking. I found the author relatable and the information incredibly helpful.
Where others pointed out his flaws in drifting into politics and "mansplaining" what mansplaining was, I saw his humanity. He struggles with overtalking and has written on the topic with openness, vulnerability, and honesty. As a woman, I thought the information on how men and women communicate differently was useful.
This book was exactly what I was looking for. I will likely listen to it again. His tips were useful, and I will be applying them to my own life. If you struggle with talking too much, nervous talking, or interrupting, I think you will find this book helpful. Use the tips and let go of the sections that talked about politics.
I think his editor should have weeded that out, but I still found this book to be helpful and worth listening to.
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- Hitch Source
- 04-18-23
A comprehensive dive into how silence brings power
While I’m personally a relatively quiet person, I’ve been on the other end of over-talking many times. Dan did a great job of describing the headwinds that over-talking creates and provides ideas for people on both ends of the spectrum to manage it. The book is very insightful and backed by researchers and thought leaders in the subject. I found his section on parenting and the link between boredom and creativity especially interesting, Between games, social media, and over parenting, our kids simply don’t have a chance to be bored and that is taking a toll on them. That is something I look forward to applying to my kids.
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- Dave
- 03-29-23
some good, some not so good
the author has some good points and strategies. the author's political bias' come out several times which diminish the point he tries to make.
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- Amazon Customer
- 03-10-24
Saving my sanity
This is my first audio book. I’m hooked! Each chapter had something in it for everyone. I scored a 50 on the talkoholic test. The changes I have made in one week have left me feeling happy and so less stressed. My husband, daughter, and bosses have noticed a positive change. I can honestly say that this book may have saved my job. Thank you!
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- MaryAnn Mertz
- 04-30-24
Just alright
There were parts of this book I enjoyed and too many that I didn’t enjoy. You can tell this author leans a certain direction politically and that’s fine but it didn’t contribute to the book in my opinion. It was like he wanted to put his views in and they didn’t really benefit my learning on how to not over talk. My takeaway is to really listen and focus on what others are saying.
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