Slouch Witch
The Lazy Girl's Guide to Magic, Book 1
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Narrated by:
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Tanya Eby
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By:
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Helen Harper
About this listen
Let's get one thing straight - Ivy Wilde is not a heroine. In fact she's probably the last witch in the world you'd call if you needed a magical helping hand, regardless of her actual abilities. If it were down to Ivy, she'd spend all day every day on her sofa, where she could watch TV, munch junk food, and talk to her feline familiar to her heart's content.
However, when a bureaucratic disaster ends up with Ivy as the victim of a case of mistaken identity, she's yanked very unwillingly into Arcane Branch, the investigative department of the Hallowed Order of Magical Enlightenment. Her problems are quadrupled when a valuable object is stolen right from under the Order's noses.
It doesn't exactly help that she's been magically bound to Adeptus Exemptus Raphael Winter. He might have piercing sapphire eyes and a body a cover model would be proud of, but as far as Ivy's concerned, he's a walking advertisement for the joyless perils of too much witch work.
And if he makes her go to the gym again, she's definitely going to turn him into a frog.
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Lily Locke has never believed in witches and wizards, ghosts and magic, shifters and vampires - especially cute blonde vamps with blood-intolerance issues. A rising star at a hotshot marketing agency in Minneapolis, Minnesota, all Lily knows is that she's a PowerPoint guru, an Excel ninja, and a coffee-maker extraordinaire. Not to mention she's next in line for a huge promotion.
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Watered Down Stephanie Plum Plot
- By Teethnclaws on 11-14-16
By: Gina LaManna
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Love, Lies, and Hocus Pocus Cat Magic
- A Lily Singer Adventures Novella (A Lily Singer Cozy Fantasy Novella, Book 0)
- By: Lydia Sherrer
- Narrated by: Amy McFadden
- Length: 2 hrs and 37 mins
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Blessed (or cursed, depending on who you ask) with human intelligence, Sir Edgar Allan Kipling, magical talking cat extraordinaire, spends most of his time keeping his human out of trouble. Of course, having a wizard for a human means that trouble is never far away. When Sir Kipling's human goes away for the weekend and leaves him to guard her magical library, things start out quiet. But he soon discovers witches smelling suspiciously of demon magic snooping about, and quiet goes out the window as chaos looms on the horizon.
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all smile
- By Jim Osmun on 10-14-21
By: Lydia Sherrer
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Rosemary and Rue
- An October Daye Novel, Book 1
- By: Seanan McGuire
- Narrated by: Mary Robinette Kowal
- Length: 11 hrs and 16 mins
- Unabridged
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The world of Faerie never disappeared: it merely went into hiding, continuing to exist parallel to our own. Secrecy is the key to Faerie’s survival—but no secret can be kept forever, and when the fae and mortal worlds collide, changelings are born. Half-human, half-fae, outsiders from birth, these second-class children of Faerie spend their lives fighting for the respect of their immortal relations.
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Missed Matched Pair
- By G Reinhardt on 11-26-11
By: Seanan McGuire
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Dragonblight
- Interim Dragon Series, Book 1
- By: Katie MacAlister
- Narrated by: Hillary Huber
- Length: 6 hrs and 48 mins
- Unabridged
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Seven wyverns, six dragon mates, and a mouthy demon named Jim. When word comes that a demon lord plans to curse all of dragonkin, Aisling, Drake, and the rest of the weyr take immediate action. But before they can find out just who is behind the threat, and why the curse is being cast, the red dragons disappear, leaving behind oddly familiar - but deadly - new foes.
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Very good series start
- By Nana_PEE on 10-08-24
By: Katie MacAlister
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Angel's Ink
- The Asylum Tales, Book 1
- By: Jocelynn Drake
- Narrated by: Michael Urie
- Length: 10 hrs and 49 mins
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Looking for a tattoo - and maybe a little something extra: a burst of good luck, a dollop of true love, or even a hex on an ex? Head to the quiet and mysterious Gage, the best skin artist in town. Using unique potions - a blend of extraordinary ingredients and special inks - to etch the right symbol, he can fulfill any heart's desire. But in a place like Low Town, where elves, faeries, trolls, werewolves, and vampires happily walk among humanity, everything has its price. No one knows that better than Gage.
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Worst Narrator for a sorry story
- By Laura C. Brooks on 08-27-13
By: Jocelynn Drake
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Witches of Half Moon Bay Series Box Set: Books 1-3
- A Witch's Call, A Witch's Destiny, A Witch's Fate (Witches of Half Moon Box Set, Book 1)
- By: Heather Hildenbrand
- Narrated by: Kelly Pruner
- Length: 26 hrs and 37 mins
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As a college student, I spend my days in class and my evenings selling sage to PTA moms who do moon rituals to manifest better parking spaces. My best friend is a cat who likes pizza, and a “night out” includes hand delivering mysterious packages to the local “coven” of small business owners who repeatedly invite me to their meetings - clothing optional. My life is weird. But it’s not magic. Magic isn’t real. At least, that’s what I believed - right up until the moment he walks into my store.
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Misleading reviews.
- By J. Maji on 06-07-21
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Omens
- By: Kelley Armstrong
- Narrated by: Carine Montbertrand, Mozhan Marnò
- Length: 14 hrs and 36 mins
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Twenty-four-year-old Olivia Taylor Jones has the perfect life. The only daughter of a wealthy, prominent Chicago family, she has an Ivy League education, pursues volunteerism and philanthropy, and is engaged to a handsome young tech firm CEO with political ambitions. But Olivia’s world is shattered when she learns that she’s adopted. Her real parents? Todd and Pamela Larsen, notorious serial killers serving a life sentence.
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Great start to a new series, but... CRINGE!
- By BookMama on 12-22-13
By: Kelley Armstrong
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Secrets
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- By: Liz Schulte
- Narrated by: Gabriel Vaughan, Piper Goodeve
- Length: 10 hrs and 27 mins
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While Olivia Martin observed life through her camera, the Abyss gazed back at her. She discovers mysterious men follow her around, people close to her are dying, and her dreams are no longer her own as she falls head over heels for a perfect stranger. A chance encounter leads to an obsession that could destroy everything she has ever known or loved. Olivia is about to find out there is a lot she doesn't know and sometimes what you don't know can kill you.
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This is an odd duck.
- By bluestatereader on 07-19-14
By: Liz Schulte
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Spirit Legacy
- The Gateway Trilogy, Book 1
- By: E. E. Holmes
- Narrated by: Lyssa Browne
- Length: 10 hrs and 44 mins
- Unabridged
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Some cryptic words wake college student Jess Ballard from a terrifying dream into an even more terrifying reality. Jess’ life has never been what anyone would call easy; doing damage control in the wake of your nomadic, alcoholic mother doesn't exactly make for a storybook childhood. But now, her world has fallen apart just when it should be coming together: her mother gone—dead under mysterious circumstances; her life uprooted to stay with estranged relatives she’s never met; and there’s something odd about some of the people she’s been meeting at school: They’re dead.
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My mistake
- By KayTee on 06-26-22
By: E. E. Holmes
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Bitten
- The Otherworld Series, Book 1
- By: Kelley Armstrong
- Narrated by: Aasne Vigesaa
- Length: 12 hrs and 54 mins
- Unabridged
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Elena Michaels is the world’s only female werewolf. And she’s tired of it. Tired of a life spent hiding and protecting, a life where her most important job is hunting down rogue werewolves. Tired of a world that not only accepts the worst in her–her temper, her violence—but requires it. Worst of all, she realizes she’s growing content with that life, with being that person.
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Definitely written in the 2000s
- By Kathy Kuwano on 07-16-22
By: Kelley Armstrong
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Red-Headed Stepchild
- By: Jaye Wells
- Narrated by: Cynthia Holloway
- Length: 8 hrs and 53 mins
- Unabridged
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Sabina Kane doesn't really fit in. And being an assassin doesn't help matters. But she's never brought her work home. Until now. Sabina's latest mission is uncomfortably complex and threatens the fragile peace between the vampire and mage races. As she scrambles to figure out which side she's on, she uncovers a tangled political web, some nasty facts about her family, and some unexpected new talents. Any of these things could be worryingly life changing, but together they could be lethal.
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One of the Worst Books I've "Read"
- By BestBooksBestPrice on 09-12-12
By: Jaye Wells
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love this book
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A First
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Young young adult book
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Broken Moon
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Twelve years ago, I was hobbled by my alpha, cast out of my pack, and forced into an unfriendly world without any protection. Despite being unable to shift, I have talents the others don't have. I can see the spirits of dead people, for one. And I have a knack for fighting rogue supernaturals. My ex-alpha will never let me back in, but there's another alpha in the city. Something has been killing his wolves, and he wants me to destroy it before it takes another one. He'll triple my going rate—but that's not the thing that makes me agree to help him. He says he can free my wolf.
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Totally satisfied!
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When my magic manifested at puberty, my parents sold me to the Illuminati. The Order of the Illuminati trained me as an assassin, spy, and thief. But when they sent me to steal a magical artifact that reveals Truth in all things, I discovered that I was working for the Dark and not the Light. The Illuminati trained me well, and paid the ultimate price for their deception.
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No spoilers
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Remember that old line about how the only way out of the organization is in a pine box? Well, Rue Hollis spent 10 years thinking she had escaped the Black Hat Bureau, no coffin required. Then her former partner had to go and shatter the illusion by showing up on her doorstep with grim tidings.
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A new, fun story!
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How to Save an Undead Life
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Grier Woolworth spends her nights weaving spooky tales of lost souls and tragedies for tourists on the streets of downtown Savannah. Hoop skirt and parasol aside, it's not a bad gig. The pay is crap, but the tips keep the lights on in her personal haunted mansion and her pantry stocked with ramen. Life is about as normal as it gets for an ex-necromancer hiding among humans - until the society that excommunicated Grier offers her a second chance at being more than ordinary. Too bad no one warned her the trouble with being extraordinary is it can get you killed.
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Kindle’s text-to-speech voice is better narrator!
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The Dreamweaver Series: Books One to Three
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Zoe Lydon is afraid. She's not left her house in almost two year, and she has an almost suffocating fear of strangers, not to mention the outside world. What she's about to realize, however, is that she can escape her reality through her dreams. Unfortunately, it's quite possible that her nightmares are only just beginning....
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Another winner from Helen Harper!
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Bo Blackman
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Bo Blackman is forced to live with her newfound status as a celebrity. She's still determined, however, to solve the mystery of Tobias Renfrew, the daemon billionaire who disappeared over fifty years ago.
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Corrigan
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Corrigan wasn't always the Lord Alpha of the Brethren. And he wasn't always in love with Mackenzie Smith, an alleged werehamster with anger management problems. But he has always been a powerful shapeshifter who faces trouble head-on, no matter what shifter politics or supernatural machinations get in his way. Now his world isn't just filled with magic and mayhem. There's also a considerable amount of fire.
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The other perspective
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What listeners say about Slouch Witch
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- musical.treble
- 01-21-18
A very enjoyable read/listen
I loved this book and an re-listening to the whole series. I enjoyed every minute.
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- Steph Dawning
- 03-16-18
terrific match of character voice and reader
I liked this story quite a bit, it was a fun mystery. the characters were even better. and the reader perfectly captured the laconic voice I read into the heroine.
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Overall
- Elizabeth Wakefield
- 09-04-17
curious, but enjoyable
can't understand why a book that clearly is set in Britain is narrated by American. enjoyable, but the UK slang was distracting in an American accent.
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- Leah
- 01-05-18
Good story, confusing narration
It was quite confusing that a British woman was narrated in an American accent. It took me a while to get used to that. The story was good though and I will continue to listen to the series.
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- IloveYAbooks
- 08-16-18
Looooove
I'll keep this simple: Favorite. UF. Comedy. Series. Everrrrr. The romance, characters, world, the cat . . . everything, just everything
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- Qiong Yi Yang
- 08-23-17
Great story, funny characters.
Finished the book in one day, couldn't wait for the mystery to be solved. Loved all the characters. The narrator wasn't so bad as other have said. I thought she did a good job on the female character's attitudes. Downloading the 2nd book. Hope the 3rd will be out soon.
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- Beckett Family
- 07-17-22
Ivy is incredible!
Ivy was expelled from the order for something she did do. She enjoys driving a taxi as little as she could to support her lifestyle, which is insolence magnified. By a mistake she is bound for over a year to the most arrogant almost OCD yet skilled witch. Their interactions make the book! It is humorous to watch them as they are confronted with multiple murders and thefts. The narrator, Tanya Eby, does a great job with Helen Harper's story!
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- Kindle Customer
- 03-20-24
Fun, well written witchy whodunnit
Really enjoyed the world building, characters and mystery element. Excited to listen to rest of the series.
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- Skye Spoon
- 05-06-24
awesome 💯 both the book and the narrator!:)
Great book. about to listen to book 2,!!:) even liked the narrator. Great for a paranormal thriller.
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- Stephanie R
- 10-06-17
Arg!
I absolutely loved this book, but how are you gonna leave us with an ending like that Mrs Harper!? 😳😬 killing me! Can’t wait to read/listen to book 2! Mrs Eby made all the different peoples voice recognizable as different and fun!
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1 person found this helpful