The Book of Separation
A Memoir
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Narrated by:
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Tova Mirvis
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By:
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Tova Mirvis
About this listen
The memoir of a woman who leaves her faith and her marriage and sets out to navigate the terrifying, liberating terrain of a newly mapless world.
Born and raised in a tight-knit Orthodox Jewish family, Tova Mirvis committed herself to observing the rules and rituals prescribed by this way of life. After all, to observe was to be accepted and to be accepted was to be loved. She married a man from within the fold and quickly began a family.
But over the years, her doubts became noisier than her faith, and at age 40 she could no longer breathe in what had become a suffocating existence. Even though it would mean the loss of her friends, her community, and, possibly, even her family, Tova decides to leave her husband and her faith. After years of trying to silence the voice inside her that said she did not agree, did not fit in, did not believe, she strikes out on her own to discover what she does believe and who she really is. This will mean forging a new way of life not just for herself, but for her children, who are struggling with what the divorce and her new status as "not Orthodox" means for them.
This is a memoir about what it means to decide to heed your inner compass at long last. To free the part of yourself that has been suppressed, even if it means walking away from the only life you've ever known. Honest and courageous, Tova takes us through her first year outside her marriage and community as she learns to silence her fears and seek adventure on her own path to happiness.
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Nora and Theresa Flynn are 21 and 17 when they leave their small village in Ireland and journey to America. Nora is the responsible sister; she's shy and serious and engaged to a man she isn't sure that she loves. Theresa is gregarious; she is thrilled by their new life in Boston and besotted with the fashionable dresses and dance halls on Dudley Street. But when Theresa ends up pregnant, Nora is forced to come up with a plan - a decision with repercussions they are both far too young to understand.
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The narration ruined it
- By Janis Reynolds on 06-12-17
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Between Two Worlds
- Growing Up in the Shadow of Saddam
- By: Zainab Salbi, Laurie Becklund
- Narrated by: Josephine Bailey
- Length: 10 hrs and 28 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Zainab Salbi was 11-years-old when her father was chosen to serve as Saddam Hussein's personal pilot, her family often forced to spend weekends with Saddam where he watched their every move. As a palace insider, Zainab offers a singular glimpse of what it is like to come of age under a dictator and provides an intimate portrait of the man she was taught to call "uncle". She watched as Saddam pitted friends, spouses, and even children against each other to compete for his approval.
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An excellent history lesson
- By Ella on 12-01-09
By: Zainab Salbi, and others
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Bitter in the Mouth
- By: Monique Truong
- Narrated by: Jennifer Ikeda
- Length: 10 hrs and 15 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Story
Growing up in the small town of Boiling Springs, North Carolina, in the 70’s and 80’s, Linda believes that she is profoundly different from everyone else, including the members of her own family. “What I know about you, little girl, would break you in two” are the cruel, mysterious last words that Linda’s grandmother ever says to her.
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"Tasting Words" made this hard to hear!
- By Kate Anderson on 11-06-11
By: Monique Truong
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Stolen Innocence
- My Story of Growing Up in a Polygamous Sect, Becoming a Teenage Bride, and Breaking Free of Warren Jeffs
- By: Elissa Wall, Lisa Pulitzer
- Narrated by: Renée Raudman
- Length: 15 hrs and 50 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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In September 2007, Elissa Wall, the star witness against polygamous sect leader Warren Jeffs, gave captivating testimony of how Jeffs forced her to marry her first cousin at age 14. This harrowing account proved to be the most compelling evidence against Jeffs, showing the harsh realities of this closed community and the lengths to which Jeffs went in order to control the sect's women. Now, in this courageous memoir, Wall tells the incredible story of how she emerged from the confines of the Fundamentalist Church of Latter Day Saints and helped bring one of America's most notorious criminals to justice.
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Chris from Cedar City, UT USA
- By Christine on 06-14-08
By: Elissa Wall, and others
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Saving Alex
- When I Was Fifteen I Told My Mormon Parents I Was Gay, and That's When My Nightmare Began
- By: Alex Cooper
- Narrated by: Luci Christian Bell
- Length: 8 hrs and 48 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Days after Alex Cooper told her parents she was gay, they drove Alex from their home in Southern California to Utah, where they signed over guardianship to fellow Mormons who promised to save Alex from her homosexuality. For eight harrowing months, Alex was held captive in an unlicensed "residential treatment program" modeled on the many "therapeutic" boot camps scattered across Utah.
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I'm a Christian straight, divorced man, with 2 kids that lives in the heart of the Bible Belt.... Alabama
- By Ronald on 03-30-16
By: Alex Cooper
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Cartwheels in a Sari
- A Memoir of Growing Up Cult
- By: Jayanti Tamm
- Narrated by: Jayanti Tamm
- Length: 7 hrs and 47 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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In this colorful, eye-opening memoir, Jayanti Tamm offers an unforgettable glimpse into the hidden world of growing up cult in mainstream America. Through Jayanti's fascinating story, the first book to chronicle Sri Chinmoy, she unmasks a leader who convinces thousands of disciples to follow him, scores of nations to dedicate monuments to him, and throngs of celebrities (Sting, Pope John Paul II, Nelson Mandela) to extol him.
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A Must-Listen
- By Lauren on 04-14-10
By: Jayanti Tamm
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If All the Seas Were Ink
- A Memoir
- By: Ilana Kurshan
- Narrated by: Dara Rosenberg
- Length: 9 hrs and 41 mins
- Unabridged
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This memoir is a tale of heartache and humor, of love and loss, of marriage and motherhood, and of learning to put one foot in front of the other by turning page after page. Ilana Kurshan takes us on a deeply accessible and personal guided tour of the Talmud, shedding new light on its stories and offering insights into its arguments - both for those already familiar with the text and for those who have never encountered it. For people of the book - both Jewish and non-Jewish - If All the Seas Were Ink is a celebration of learning how to fall in love once again.
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Started out interesting, but flagged badly
- By Chana Goanna on 01-27-20
By: Ilana Kurshan
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Mother Daughter Me
- A Memoir
- By: Katie Hafner
- Narrated by: Katie Hafner
- Length: 9 hrs and 12 mins
- Unabridged
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The complex, deeply binding relationship between mothers and daughters is brought vividly to life in Katie Hafner's remarkable memoir, an exploration of the year she and her mother, Helen, spent working through, and triumphing over, a lifetime of unresolved emotions. Dreaming of a "year in Provence" with her mother, Katie urges Helen to move to San Francisco to live with her and Zoe, Katie's teenage daughter. Katie and Zoe had become a mother-daughter team, strong enough, Katie thought, to absorb the arrival of a 77-year-old woman set in her ways....
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Listen and be swept away!
- By Barbara Quick on 06-02-22
By: Katie Hafner
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Rare Bird
- A Memoir of Loss and Love
- By: Anna Whiston-Donaldson
- Narrated by: Hillary Huber
- Length: 8 hrs and 13 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
On an ordinary September day, 12-year-old Jack is swept away in a freak neighborhood flood. His parents and younger sister are left to wrestle with the awful questions: How could God let this happen? Can we ever be happy again? They each fall into the abyss of grief in different ways. And in the days and months to come, they each find their faltering way toward peace. In Rare Bird, Anna Whiston-Donaldson unfolds a mother's story of loss that leads, in time, to enduring hope.
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Warning! Tears
- By Madge on 08-16-15
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Everything You Ever Wanted
- A Memoir
- By: Jillian Lauren
- Narrated by: Jillian Lauren
- Length: 8 hrs and 16 mins
- Unabridged
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Story
In her younger years, Jillian Lauren was a college dropout, a drug addict, and an international concubine in the Prince of Brunei's harem, an experience she immortalized in her best-selling memoir, Some Girls. In her 30s, Jillian's most radical act is learning the steadying power of love when she and her rock star husband adopt an Ethiopian child with special needs.
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Great for adoptive families
- By berry bomb on 07-06-22
By: Jillian Lauren
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Native Country of the Heart
- A Memoir
- By: Cherríe Moraga
- Narrated by: Cherríe Moraga
- Length: 7 hrs and 28 mins
- Unabridged
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Native Country of the Heart is the writer and activist Cherrie Moraga's love letter to her "unlettered" mother. It begins with her mother, Elvira Isabel Moraga, who as a child, along with her siblings, was hired out by her own father to pick cotton in California's Imperial Valley. The lives of Cherrie and her mother, and of their people, are woven together in a story of critical reflection and deep personal revelation as Moraga charts her own coming to consciousness alongside the heartbreaking story of her mother's decline.
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a must read for all chicanx
- By Rachel Barnett on 04-28-19
By: Cherríe Moraga
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The Unspeakable
- And Other Subjects of Discussion
- By: Meghan Daum
- Narrated by: Meghan Daum
- Length: 6 hrs and 48 mins
- Unabridged
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Story
It's a report tempered by hard times. In "Matricide", Daum unflinchingly describes a parent's death and the uncomfortable emotions it provokes; and in "Diary of a Coma" she relates her own journey to the twilight of the mind. But Daum also operates in a comic register. With perfect precision, she reveals the absurdities of the marriage-industrial complex, of the New Age dating market, and of the peculiar habits of the young and digital.
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Complaining about her dead mom.
- By Erik Hermansen on 11-23-14
By: Meghan Daum
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Happy Wives Club
- One Woman's Worldwide Search for the Secrets of a Great Marriage
- By: Fawn Weaver
- Narrated by: Fawn Weaver
- Length: 6 hrs and 27 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Everywhere she looked, Fawn Weaver saw negative portrayals of marriage dominating the airwaves and dooming everyone to failure. Looking at Keith, the love of her life, she knew that wasn't true. Happy Wives Club is Fawn's journey across the world to meet her friends and discover what makes their marriages great. Join her on this exciting, exotic trip across six continents and through more than 18 cities.
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beautiful
- By Amazon Customer on 07-13-18
By: Fawn Weaver
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The Imam's Daughter
- My Desperate Flight to Freedom
- By: Hannah Shah
- Narrated by: Christine Rendel
- Length: 6 hrs and 52 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Hannah Shah is an Imam's daughter. She lived the life of a devout Muslim in a family of Pakistani Muslims in England, but behind the front door, she was a caged butterfly. For many years, her father abused her in the cellar of their home. At 16, she discovered a plan to send her to Pakistan for an arranged marriage, and she gathered the courage to run away. Relentlessly hunted by her angry father and brothers, who were intent on executing an "honor" killing, she moved from house to house in perpetual fear to escape them.
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only half of the story is in Audible!
- By ellen on 02-09-11
By: Hannah Shah
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Do you ever wonder how you woke up one day with all the responsibilities of a grown-up who secretly enjoys buying groceries in bulk, can no longer recognize the tween celebrities on the magazines at checkout, but is still surprised when a Starbucks barista calls you “ma’am” - because your inside self is frozen in time to about 20 years ago? So does Lisa-Jo Baker.
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Not for me
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Sharp
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Dorothy Parker, Rebecca West, Hannah Arendt, Mary McCarthy, Susan Sontag, Pauline Kael, Joan Didion, Nora Ephron, Renata Adler, and Janet Malcolm - these brilliant women are the central figures of Sharp. Their lives intertwine as they cut through the cultural and intellectual history of America in the 20th century, arguing as fervently with each other as they did with the sexist attitudes of the men who often undervalued their work as critics and essayists.These women are united by what Dean terms as "sharpness", the ability to cut to the quick with precision of thought and wit, a claiming of power through writing rather than position.
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The best narration I've heard in a long time.
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Ever since she was a child, every aspect of Julia Haart’s life—what she wore, what she ate, what she thought—was controlled by the dictates of ultra-Orthodox Judaism. At 19, after a lifetime spent caring for her seven younger siblings, she was married off to a man she barely knew. For the next 23 years, her marriage would rule her life. Eventually, when Haart’s younger daughter, Miriam, started to innocently question why she wasn’t allowed to sing in public, run in shorts, or ride a bike without being covered from neck to knee, Haart reached a breaking point.
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Missing key points
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What Becomes a Legend Most
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In his acclaimed portraits, Richard Avedon captured the iconic figures of the twentieth century in his starkly bold, intimately minimal, and forensic visual style. What Becomes a Legend Most is the first definitive biography of this luminary—an intensely driven man who endured personal and professional prejudice, struggled with deep insecurities, and mounted an existential lifelong battle to be recognized as an artist. Philip Gefter builds on archival research and exclusive interviews with those closest to Avedon to chronicle his story.
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Poor pronunciation :(
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My Thoughts Exactly
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So, this is me. Lily Allen. I am a woman. I am a mother. I was a wife. I drink. I have taken drugs. I have loved and been let down. I am a success and a failure. I am a songwriter. I am a singer. I am all these things and more. When women share their stories, loudly and clearly and honestly, things begin to change - for the better. This is my story.
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Deeply Emotional
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A Brilliant Life
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As Mira is nearing the end of her life, her daughter Rachelle wants to find out how her mother had lived through four concentration camps, including Auschwitz, and a Death March. There was a mystery to her survival, it seemed—which perhaps had something to do with the strange things that always happened around her. And, incredibly, when giving testimony later in life, she says that it was during this time—despite witnessing the depths of man’s cruelty—that she learned about “the goodness of people.”
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Beautiful
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I've Seen the Future and I'm Not Going
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Brilliantly funny, frank, and shattering, this is the bittersweet memoir by Peter McGough of his life with artist David McDermott. Set in New York’s Lower East Side of the 1980s and mid-1990s, it is also a devastatingly candid look at the extreme naiveté and dysfunction that would destroy both their lives.
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Funny, endearing, and soul-baringly frank
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What listeners say about The Book of Separation
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- Factual
- 06-03-18
Good book
A good read; however, she is too simplistic about her assessment of Orthodox Jews and Judaism.
Personally, I don’t think she was ever really into it
Also, she now claims everything is so great.
Let’s see what she says in ten years.
She’ll probably be divorced again- and never happy.
Too bad for Toba.
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- simplysarah
- 11-23-19
There are many ways to be
It's hard for me to put into words how this book made me feel. Essentially, less alone. <3
I was also raised in an orthodox religion (though not Jewish), I also spent my young adulthood trying to piece together the puzzle of being a strong, educated feminist in a patriarchal faith community -- convinced that I could. And, ultimately, I also left. But of course leaving is not that simple. As Tova says -- you leave again, and again.
I love the way Tova captures the pain and challenge and excitement of straddling two worlds and two selves in the journey towards authenticity.
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3 people found this helpful
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- Beth
- 02-08-18
An honest memoir
I liked the honesty and insight into orthodox belief . I was raised reformed Jewish and never knew much about Orthodox Judaism .
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- Michelle Redo
- 09-30-24
A wonderful listen!
Nothing like hearing a memoirist brave both the writing and reading of her story. Now I need to buy the book!
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- Loreal Lavigna
- 10-31-17
Simply amazing!!!
This book was fantastic start to finish! I cannot say enough how incredible Tova mirvis is as an author, and in this case, as a narrator. This was the 1st of her books that I have read, and it is her story 1st and foremost. The audible performance is simply incredible to listen to, and as you listen you are drawn in not just by the words that are narrated but by the over all Passion with which she tells her story. You're brought into a world that you may not know anything about to start with, as I was, having had little experience in my own personal life. I had family who were Jewish but by the time I came along, those family members were either about to pass on or had already passed on. Therefore, I didn't have the opportunity to learn about the Jewish heritage in my family. I heard stories growing up from my mother, but as she was not practicing in the faith, nor were her parents and siblings, all they were to me were stories of my great grandparents and their beliefs. I never got to hear them firsthand. Listening to this book transforms a story that I had simply heard over the years as I grew up into so much more for me. I learned more about the faith, practices, and this author's struggle When she chose to no longer remain orthodox. The way in which she tells her story you feel like you are right there with her every step of the way, and for me at least, feeling much of what she felt just in listening to her tell her story in her own words.
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4 people found this helpful
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- Kindle Customer
- 12-15-18
Beautifully written
Tova Was able to dig deep into her soul and so eloquently share her deepest feelings. I was so grateful for all she shared about how hard it is to leave something that has so long been a part of you, so you can stay true to your heart and feelings. I felt so many parallels to her story of leaving orthodox Judaism and my leaving Mormonism. You feel a tug from both ends. These are things that as you try to separate from you have to reconcile that there are pieces that will always be a part of you. I loved how she compared leaving orthodoxy to leaving your childhood home. Although you will continue to go back and always have strong memories that is no longer where you live. Thank you for Sharing such a personal experience so that I can gain strength and learn I am not alone.
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1 person found this helpful
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- SG
- 02-04-18
Tova's Writing Skill Shines <br />with Happy Ending
Tova is a Modern Orthodox Jewish woman married at 22 to observant young husband who is satisfied with following the intricate rules of their religion. Tova questions their religious practices, many of which are sexist & burdensome for wives, and she pulls away as her career as novelist & writer begins to take off. She describes her emotional struggle to separate from her religious husband but maintain her relationship with her 3 kids, each of whom have different perspectives on their religious practices. Tova is a woman of privilege so her journey to leave Orthodoxy is more of a social change, her former community rejects her but she shares her kids with ex-husband & finds a new non-religious husband even as she divorces the first one. Her description of the divorce process both from husband & community is well-written. Her life as religious wife has changed, she grew up & out & finds happiness in her new world of independence & choice. Sympathy comes from her emotional path but she's ok financially, romantically & professionally. Interesting to learn about the restrictive Orthodox practices that seem so archaic & abusive to me as a non-religious Jew.
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- Cortney
- 01-05-18
So many parallels
I am a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, a Mormon. I have recently decided to step away from the church. As I listened to the words read by Tova I was struck by how many similarities there are between her experience and mine. different religions, different rituals, different customs yet so many of her words hit home to my heart.
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10 people found this helpful
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- Anne Cloward
- 03-11-19
Such Great Writing!!
I have been a fan of Tova's writing for many years. This was no exception!
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- Libya
- 09-08-18
this book could have ended in 7 chapters.
pros: view of modern orthodox Judaism in many variations and the challenges facing both women and men.
cons: so many cathartic moments that they eventually felt snooze-worthy. oh she realizes that marriage at 23 was a mistake. "yup." she sees her sister get married and wishes she could talk to her 23 y.o. self. "yup." she throws the ring she's worn since 23y.o. in a lake (quote: "the water will know what to do with it. " "yup."
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