
The Sex Talk You Never Got
Reclaiming the Heart of Masculine Sexuality
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Narrated by:
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Sam Jolman
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John Eldredge
About this listen
Read by the author.
Men today are starved for sexual formation. They've been failed by parents, churches, and culture alike, leading to widespread shame, confusion, and brokenness in the area of sexuality. In The Sex Talk You Never Got, therapist Sam Jolman helps men reconnect their God-given sexuality with innocence, awe, and joy, and shows listeners how to celebrate--instead of struggle against--the gift of sexual desire.
In our sex-saturated world, it might seem surprising that men need more talk about sex. But the reality is that sexuality is one of the most neglected aspects of men's lives. From the woefully inadequate sex talks many young men receive from parents (little more than an anatomy lesson or a purity lecture, if anything at all) to cultural messages that unhelpfully weave both shame and permissiveness into men's understanding of their own sexuality and masculinity, too many boys and men experience sexual desire as an area of struggle, confusion, and brokenness.
But it doesn't need to be this way. God made men to be moved, to live with wonder and awe--and sexual desire must be formed within the context of that design. Sam Jolman, a professional therapist who specializes in men's issues and sexual trauma recovery, shows men the way out of the wilds of sexual struggle.
This timely and incisive book will help listeners:
- learn about the vital link between sexual desire and their identity as worshipers;
- regain a wild and vigorous sexuality within the context of God's design;
- understand how purity culture has needlessly put men in a conflict-ridden relationship with their sexuality;
- see sexual purity not as the goal but as the preparation for becoming fully alive to beauty, awe, and worship; and
- discover how to trade shame and confusion for a sexuality that's filled with innocence and wonder.
In the Bible, Jesus' greatest kindness was often offered to those suffering sexual harm and brokenness. He offers this same kindness today. He does not want men to repent of their sexual desire. Rather, through reconnecting sexuality with innocence and awe, God opens the door for men to experience the wild joy of desire, rightly ordered toward worship and God's good purposes for their life.
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Medieval Myths & Mysteries
- By: Dorsey Armstrong, The Great Courses
- Narrated by: Dorsey Armstrong
- Length: 5 hrs and 6 mins
- Original Recording
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The 10 enlightening (and often humorous) lectures of Medieval Myths and Mysteries will show you how far from the “dark” times of legend these centuries were. Uncover the facts about the Knights Templar. Reveal the truth behind the tales of legendary creatures like the Questing Beast and the unicorn. Trace the events of the Black Death and the ways it altered the world in its wake, and much more. With Professor Armstrong, you will dig deep into the ways that later generations reshaped the narrative of the medieval years and perpetuated the myths.
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Interesting, but centered on Britain
- By Ximena on 04-10-20
By: Dorsey Armstrong, and others
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The Book of Enoch
- By: Unknown
- Narrated by: Christopher Glyn
- Length: 4 hrs and 12 mins
- Unabridged
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The book of Enoch was thought to be lost for over 2,000 years until, in 1773, a traveller brought three copies back from Ethiopia. Whether or not this ancient book was actually authored by Enoch, the father of Methuselah and great-grandfather of Noah, is an ongoing debate among historians and theologians. But all recognise the book of Enoch as one of the most important apocalyptic works outside of the Bible.
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Further Information
- By Timothy on 01-11-20
By: Unknown
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My Big TOE: Awakening
- Book One of a Trilogy Unifying Philosophy, Physics, and Metaphysics
- By: Thomas Campbell
- Narrated by: Thomas Campbell
- Length: 11 hrs and 11 mins
- Unabridged
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My Big TOE: Awakening, written by a nuclear physicist in the language of contemporary culture, unifies science and philosophy, physics and metaphysics, mind and matter, purpose and meaning, the normal and the paranormal. The entirety of human experience (mind, body, and spirit) including both our objective and subjective worlds is brought together under one seamless scientific understanding.
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What a Trip (but to where?)
- By Michael on 11-26-13
By: Thomas Campbell
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Super Attractor
- Methods for Manifesting a Life Beyond Your Wildest Dreams
- By: Gabrielle Bernstein
- Narrated by: Gabrielle Bernstein
- Length: 6 hrs and 25 mins
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Ready to turn what you want into the life that you live? The number-one New York Times best-selling author of The Universe Has Your Back shows you how. In Super Attractor, Gabrielle Bernstein lays out the essential methods for manifesting a life beyond your wildest dreams. This book is a journey of remembering where your true power lies. You'll learn how to co-create the life you want. You'll accept that life can flow, that attracting is fun, and that you don't have to work so hard to get what you want.
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Not a huge fan
- By Pamela H on 09-30-19
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The Qur'an
- A New Translation by M. A. S. Abdel Haleem
- By: M. A. S. Abdel Haleem - translator
- Narrated by: Ayman Haleem
- Length: 19 hrs and 15 mins
- Unabridged
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The Qur'an, believed by Muslims to be the word of God, was revealed to the Prophet Muhammad 1,400 years ago. It is the supreme authority in Islam and the living source of all Islamic teaching; it is a sacred text and a book of guidance that sets out the creed, rituals, ethics, and laws of the Islamic religion. It has been one of the most influential books in the history of literature. Recognized as the greatest literary masterpiece in Arabic, it has nevertheless remained difficult to understand in its English translations.
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Missing chapter 44
- By Anonymous User on 05-29-19
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The Wisdom of the Shamans:
- What the Ancient Masters Can Teach Us About Love and Life
- By: Don Jose Ruiz
- Narrated by: Charlie Varon
- Length: 3 hrs and 9 mins
- Unabridged
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In The Wisdom of the Shamans: What the Ancient Masters Can Teach Us about Love and Life, Toltec shaman and master storyteller Don Jose Ruiz shares some of the most popular stories from his family's oral tradition and offers corresponding lessons that illustrate the larger ideas within each story. According to Ruiz, their teachings are not primitive or reserved for a chosen few initiates but are instead a powerful series of lessons on love and life that are available us all.
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Wooowzers
- By nicole tillman on 07-28-18
By: Don Jose Ruiz
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Change Your Mind
- Deprogram Your Subconscious Mind, Rewire the Brain, and Balance Your Energy
- By: RJ Spina
- Narrated by: RJ Spina
- Length: 7 hrs and 5 mins
- Unabridged
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Change Your Mind uses revolutionary teachings to help rewire your subconscious mind and bring balance to your energy. Through a fourteen-day journaling exercise, you’ll uncover the mental programming already affecting you, and then apply specialized activities to counteract it. RJ guides you every step of the way, providing meditations, mindfulness practices, and more. He demonstrates how to not only meet the real you, but also maintain and express it through numerous activities you can easily integrate into your daily life.
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OMG! What a shock!
- By Suzie Schuder on 08-24-23
By: RJ Spina
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Dr.CM separates the good aspects of the culture of purity from the twisted "purity culture" = "Not damaged goods"
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This book changed me 27 years ago
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The author's empathy is empowering to the faith based abused women.
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Reading the Gospels without knowing the personality of Jesus is like watching television with the sound turned off. The result is a dry, two dimensional person doing strange, undecipherable things.
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John Eldredge calls men back to a simple and reassuring truth: God is our father. In life's trials and triumphs, God is initiating boys and men through the stages of manhood from beloved son to cowboy to warrior to lover to king to sage. Fathered by God maps out the path of manhood - not more rules, not another list of principles, not formulas, but a sure path men have followed for centuries before us.
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great reading
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Get Your Life Back
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In Get Your Life Back, New York Times best-selling author John Eldredge provides a practical, simple, and refreshing guide to taking your life back. By practicing a few wonderfully simple practices - or what John calls “graces” - you can begin to recover your soul, disentangle from the tragedies of this broken world, and discover the restorative power of beauty.
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For Such A Time As This
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Reclaim your joy and thrive through the storms of life when you find your strength in God. The human soul has a built-in yearning for joy and beauty and all good things. But that craving for life is so easily lost in the pace and demands of modern life. Join New York Times bestselling author John Eldredge as he gives you the tools you need to follow Jesus' path of supernatural resilience. Between false promises of ease and comfort on one side and the sheer busyness and stress of daily life on the other, people today are facing a shortage of peace, happiness, and strength.
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Good for my soul
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We all need to believe that our lives can be better, our relationships can be smoother, and our futures, both in this life and the next, are bright. This 365-day devotional by New York Times best-selling author John Eldredge will guide you on a year of restoration. Each devotion features a Bible verse, a devotion, and a closing prayer or inspiring challenge that will equip you to pursue lasting transformation in your life and relationships.
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Amazing!
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Sex, God, and the Conservative Church
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As a psychotherapist and professor of marriage and family therapy and sexuality at a Christian University, Tina Schermer Sellers, PhD, has spent a career listening deeply to the often untold, most tightly held, shame-filled stories of people’s lives. Over the last 30 years in particular, these stories have revealed the devastating effects of abstinence education, the purity movement of the evangelical church, and the simultaneous removal of media regulations that allowed for an influx of sexual violence against women to enter all forms of commercial media beginning in the 1980s.
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Great book and Topic (Audio needs some work)
- By Valerie M. on 01-18-25
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The Soul of Shame
- Retelling the Stories We Believe About Ourselves
- By: Curt Thompson
- Narrated by: Jim Seybert
- Length: 8 hrs and 2 mins
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We're all infected with a spiritual disease. Its name is shame. Whether we realize it or not, shame affects every aspect of our personal lives and vocational endeavors. It seeks to destroy our identity in Christ, replacing it with a damaged version of ourselves that results in unhealed pain and brokenness. But God is telling a different story for your life. Psychiatrist Curt Thompson unpacks the soul of shame, revealing its ubiquitous nature and neurobiological roots. He also provides the theological and practical tools necessary to dismantle shame.
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Best book I’ve read in years
- By Webb on 02-24-19
By: Curt Thompson
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Wild at Heart
- Discovering the Secret of a Man's Soul
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Every man was once a boy. And every little boy has dreams, big dreams: dreams of being the hero, of beating the bad guys, of doing daring feats and rescuing the damsel in distress. Every little girl has dreams, too: of being rescued by her prince and swept up into a great adventure, knowing that she is the beauty.
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Healing & Understanding
- By Michael on 07-05-04
By: John Eldredge
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Killing Lions
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Join the conversation as a father and son talk about pursuing beauty, dealing with money, getting married, chasing dreams, knowing something real with God, and how to find a life you can call your own. Killing Lions is more than fatherly advice. It is an invitation into a journey: either to be the son who receives fathering or the father who learns what must be spoken. Most important, these conversations speak to a searching generation: "You are not alone. Its not all up to you. You are going to find your way."
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Perfect for Dads of Young Men
- By S. Wilson on 12-19-16
By: John Eldredge, and others
What listeners say about The Sex Talk You Never Got
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- John Scoggins
- 10-17-24
This book (albeit unfortunately) should be mandatory reading for men for are truly seeking to connect to their spouses.
The stories shared within this book are guaranteed to reach you in some way. I was nearly moved to tears in the later chapters as Sam expressed many of the feelings/emotions I have buried deep down inside and had no idea how to deal with.
This book is a phenomenal resource in this current day and age where father’s are doing a very poor job of educating their sons about their masculinity and sex. I highly recommend listening to this book.
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- shopsmart
- 06-24-24
A must read!
Sam brings new light and meaning to healthy male sexuality in The Church and beyond. Men have been stunted by The Church’s doomsday messages regarding male sexuality and insatiable lust & desire. These messages often are like a self-fulfilling prophecy. The damaging messages most Christian sex books for men are inundated with, Sam kindly sets right.
With Sam’s careful and thoughtful reintroduction into a man’s true lover heart, he gives hope for present and future generations of men to delve into their stories and reclaim innocence. With this book and hopefully others like it to come, we can begin to turn the tide and see men rise up to what God created them to be in their sexuality.
As a mother of two boys, it has been my heart to relearn what healthy sexuality is for men. My husband and I decided to read this book together and it has been so insightful and stirred up many good conversations. We were the product of purity culture and only in the last few years have figured out that purity culture and all we were taught and read was really at the root of some of our deepest struggles in marriage. We desperately want better for our boys as they grow and become men and know that we cannot pass on what we do not hold ourselves. It is in this process of relearning that Sam’s book came out. What a blessing!
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- Amazon Customer
- 09-22-24
Such a pivotal book, one for the ages!
To say that I loved this book is an understatement. It’s truly one for the ages because it helps us to understand the deepest dive about humanity and the ways we have both desired and hurt our sexual bonds, plus it offers many great tips for those of us raising kids also. Love the concept of many smaller and more grace-filled talks about sex with our kids and teens versus one half-talk that’s awkward and lacking.
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- Roland D Snider
- 07-01-24
A golden book with a redeeming message
There's three books on sexuality from a Christian perspective that I put at the top of my list of such books, Surfing for God, by Michael Cusick Unwanted by Jay Stringer, and this book by Sam Jolman. Why these three? Because they all address how shame drives our behavior and they all avoid emphasizing tips and techniques to merely stop doing something instead of discovering how God frees a heart that longs to live well. I appreciate men who write from their good heart that God has given them.
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- Anonymous User
- 07-18-24
I have the most beautiful books I’ve read in a long time!
I like all it seems the inspiration all of it is really wonderful And I wish everybody would read it.
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- Terri S.
- 08-08-24
Genuine healing for male masculinity!
Sam is very genuine and very real. Regaining your innocence and awe and virility are things I never thought were possible! But they are! Jesus makes all things new and Sam has helped us men so much further along the journey!
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- D. Barry
- 12-12-24
Deeply healing
This is a deep and profound vision for male sexuality. Very thoughtful and heartfelt and healthy. Vast improvement over the toxic advice that comes out of the evangelical world over the last few decades.
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- Lisa A. Barber
- 12-14-24
This book fills a much needed deficit in our culture
It is refreshing to hear sexuality discussed with such authenticity and emotional maturity in a biblically sound and scientifically correct manner. This book fills a gaping hole in the Christian ecosphere. I highly recommend this book. Mark Barber DO -Board Certified in Family Medicine.
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- Amazon Customer
- 01-15-25
Healing After Purity Culture
This book is fantastic. I highly recommend it. I will be giving away many copies.
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- Denzel Bridges
- 08-10-24
Absolute, edifying blessing
I found this book in my recommendations when I felt in my heart of hearts that something was off, if not missing. This book helped me explore many of those feelings and I feel my heart beat stronger for it. Will absolutely revisit it real soon! Thank you Sam Jolman and God bless!
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