
The Trouble with Trying to Bag a Blood Witch
Murder Sprees and Mute Decrees, Book 5
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Narrated by:
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Kevin Earlywine
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By:
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Jennifer Cody
About this listen
Elijah
Imagine coming home from an extended stay in a foreign country to find a letter from a house sitter you didn't hire warning you to get a protection order against your ex and informing you that you're a terrible plant dad.
I mean, I am a terrible plant dad, and I probably should get a protection order against Stalker Steve, but that letter isn't the weirdest thing to happen to me today. I think the teleporting alien baby who's decided to make me their perch probably takes the prize for Weirdest Thing in Elijah Penn's Life.
Fortunately, the baby's parents hired a bounty hunter to bring me and my new buddy back. Unfortunately, Darcy Hellspinner might be the sexiest man I've ever met in real life, and if it isn't clear from the fact that I call my ex Stalker Steve, I have terrible taste in men. I have the sneaking suspicion that Darcy's going to be my next big mistake, but that's ok—I'm probably going to be his too.
The Trouble with Trying to Bag a Blood Witch is a paranormal romance with a little bit of sci-fi mixed in, two MCs who think this is just an extended hook-up, and a baby alien with impeccable timing. The Foxily family is growing again. It's Darcy's turn to bring in a mate, but he's lodging an official complaint because this isn't what he signed up for.
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Performance
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I've wanted one thing for as long as I can remember—someone to love, a family, and a happily ever after. I finally found it with the least likely person across the street. Our life together has been dipped in espresso and given a massive jolt forward, but we couldn't be happier. That is, until someone threatens that happiness and I'm forced to respond in order to protect my family that's barely begun. I didn't mean for this relationship to begin bathed in blood, but I will do anything to protect the love I've waited decades for.
By: Crea Reitan
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How to Flirt with a Hellhound
- Hellhounds of Paradise Falls, Book 1
- By: Shannon Mae
- Narrated by: Iggy Toma, Alexander Cendese
- Length: 5 hrs and 51 mins
- Unabridged
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Maybe I have an overactive imagination, but the hot guy next door totally gives off serial killer vibes. Why else would he know how long it takes to bleed out from a wound? Yeah, ok, so I asked, but it was research. Being an author definitely makes for some odd questions (someone had better clear my browser history when I die, that's all I'm saying). It's not like I'm stalking my hot neighbor or anything—there's nothing wrong with watching him out my window. Although I might have my own stalker (and not the cute harmless kind), which is kind of terrifying.
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Silly and fun
- By Jazmine on 02-05-25
By: Shannon Mae
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Touch of Magic
- Mages of Mistvale, Book 1
- By: Stella Rainbow
- Narrated by: Joel Leslie
- Length: 6 hrs and 53 mins
- Unabridged
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I'd lived my whole life with a terminal illness, knowing I'd never be normal. I existed, taking it one day at a time with my dog as my sole, faithful companion. Then one day, Fate intervened and an encounter with a beautiful man gave me something I'd never had before: Hope. Raphael was kind, sweet, and almost...magical. I'd never believed in magic before I met him, but now, I wasn't so sure.
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Embarrassingly immature writing
- By Christopher A. Gordon on 01-11-25
By: Stella Rainbow
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On Circus Lane
- The Wright Brothers, Book 1
- By: Lily Morton
- Narrated by: Joel Leslie
- Length: 7 hrs and 6 mins
- Unabridged
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Story
The first time Bee Bannister met Tom Wright, he couldn’t stand him. Everything about the man aggravated him—his perfect hair and body, his confident arrogance, and the way he looked straight through Bee. Which is why it’s such an unpleasant shock to find that he’ll be sharing space with him while on a Christmas holiday with friends in Scotland.
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Everything you want it to be and more!
- By Avidreader2233 on 06-07-25
By: Lily Morton
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Woods of the Raven
- By: Mary Calmes
- Narrated by: Greg Tremblay
- Length: 7 hrs and 39 mins
- Unabridged
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Xander Corey lives simply, sustainably, on the outskirts of Osprey, a small, quaint town in Upstate New York. He’s a librarian when the town’s budget can afford him, a good friend, kind neighbor, and also, a witch. And while that’s of no concern to anyone around him, there are others, non-humans, who have a vested interest in Xander’s family land. Xander knows something dark and dangerous is brewing. He’s just not quite sure what.
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Excellent
- By Karri on 06-24-23
By: Mary Calmes
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Miz Dusty Le Frey
- MM Paranormal Romance & Dark Comedy (Crawshanks Guide to the Recently Departed: Dead Serious, Case 1)
- By: Vawn Cassidy
- Narrated by: Joel Leslie
- Length: 9 hrs and 40 mins
- Unabridged
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Tristan Everett has always preferred the company of the dead because they usually don't talk back. Being a somewhat awkward introvert working as a pathologist at the Hackney Public Mortuary suits him just fine. That is, until a freak accident with a rogue ice cube and suddenly he can see ghosts. Just when he thought his life couldn't get any weirder, sassy drag queen, Dusty Le Frey, is wheeled in with a toe tag and she's not prepared to go quietly into the light.
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Sooo good!
- By BKTSTORM on 08-14-24
By: Vawn Cassidy
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Hurt Me Not
- By: Davidson King
- Narrated by: Simon Dornet, Curtis Michael Holland
- Length: 6 hrs and 1 min
- Unabridged
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As a lieutenant at the Fool's Pass Fire Department and a single father, Easton Kooper's life revolves around his children. When he receives an urgent call from his son's doctor, it upends Easton's world. With no idea of what to do or where to turn, he's never felt more lost. And then in walks the answer he didn't know he needed: a gorgeous fae with an angelic smile, bearing grand promises to turn the Kooper family's life right side up again.
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Meh. I’m actually disappointed.
- By Beth Doesn’t Write Enough Reviews on 06-07-25
By: Davidson King
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Death Eternal
- Necromancer Rising, Book 1
- By: Richard Amos
- Narrated by: Cooper North
- Length: 8 hrs and 24 mins
- Unabridged
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On my first day in the town, I get caught up in a strange murder case, and Death saves my life. Yes, the Death. The delectable, mysterious Death. Goodness, he is hotness personified. But what happened to make him walk away from his responsibilities? And why is he so deliciously tempting, my desire a raging inferno every time he looks at me with those incredible eyes? I shouldn't be thinking of an immortal being like this, but with every passing hour I can't stop myself from falling deeper into infatuation.
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Great story. Great narration.
- By Aethena Drake on 12-21-24
By: Richard Amos
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The Insanity of Reincarnated Mages and Amorous Vampires
- Spellbound, Book 1
- By: AJ Sherwood, Devon Vesper
- Narrated by: Max Meyers, Derek Prince
- Length: 9 hrs and 54 mins
- Unabridged
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Hi, I'm Kit. Immortal vampire and technomage extraordinaire. You know how it goes. For the record, I am absolutely not stalking my reincarnated husband. Okay, I am, but it's for his own good. And mine. Er, assuming I can somehow figure out how to tell him he's reincarnated and a mage, and we all live in a sentient library. Any thoughts on that? I'm currently taking suggestions. One thing's for sure. He's not dying on me again. Never again.
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Love this author!
- By Toni L.C.B. on 08-21-24
By: AJ Sherwood, and others
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The Traitor's Curse
- Twilight Mages, Book 3
- By: Eliot Grayson
- Narrated by: Kirt Graves
- Length: 9 hrs and 33 mins
- Unabridged
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Since the sudden, suspicious, and unlamented death of his father, only one man stands between Lucian and the grudging acceptance of his subjects: Benedict, a powerful dusk mage, a military hero, the favorite of the ducal council… and Lucian's stepbrother. Not that Benedict wants a shackle disguised as a crown. He'd rather start a new, anonymous life a thousand miles away and leave that beautiful, icy, sneering little cretin Lucian to whatever grim fate awaits him.
By: Eliot Grayson
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Dragon's Dawn
- To Kill a King, Book 1
- By: Sam Burns, W.M. Fawkes
- Narrated by: Kirt Graves, Darcy Stark
- Length: 10 hrs and 54 mins
- Unabridged
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For nineteen years, I have carved myself into a dutiful son, a courtier of unimpeachable wit, and a genuine delight at a tea party. Now that my success in society has planted me in the path of Mikhail Vasiliev, it's clear I'd have been better off keeping my head down. Prince Mikhail is the second son of a traitor. Third in line to the throne, he has a reputation for violence, debauchery, and being a thorn in the side of his cousin, King Dmitri. That is until the king decides to get him out of the way—by marrying him off. To me.
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Aaaaaaah!
- By Shinashi on 02-10-24
By: Sam Burns, and others