
This Body I Wore
A Memoir
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Narrated by:
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Diana Goetsch
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By:
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Diana Goetsch
About this listen
Long before Laverne Cox appeared on the cover of Time, far removed from drag and ballroom culture, there were countless trans women living and dying as men, most of whom didn't even know they were trans. Diana Goetsch's This Body I Wore chronicles one woman's long journey to coming out, a path that runs parallel to the emergence of the trans community over the past several decades.
"How can you spend your life face-to-face with an essential truth about yourself and still not see it?" This is a question often asked of trans people, and a question that Goetsch, an award-winning poet and essayist, addresses with the power and complexity of lived reality. She brings us into her childhood, her time as a dynamic and beloved teacher at Stuyvesant High School, and her plunge into the crossdressing subculture of New York in the 1980s and '90s. Under cover of night, crossdressers risked their jobs and their safety to give expression to urges they could neither control nor understand. Many of them would become late transitioners, the Cinderellas of the trans community largely ignored by history.
Goetsch has not written a transition memoir, but rather a full account of a trans life, one both unusually public and closeted. All too often trans lives are reduced to before-and-after photos, but what if that before photo lasted fifty years?
©2022 Diana Goetsch (P)2022 TantorListeners also enjoyed...
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In her younger years, Jillian Lauren was a college dropout, a drug addict, and an international concubine in the Prince of Brunei's harem, an experience she immortalized in her best-selling memoir, Some Girls. In her 30s, Jillian's most radical act is learning the steadying power of love when she and her rock star husband adopt an Ethiopian child with special needs.
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It takes a village
- By Derek Jackson on 12-30-24
By: Jillian Lauren
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A Whisper of Solace
- By: Milena McKay
- Narrated by: Abby Craden
- Length: 11 hrs and 51 mins
- Unabridged
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Neve Blackthorne, head of one of the most successful Studios in Hollywood, is the one to rule them all. Powerful, beautiful, and aloof, she's ruthless, yet irresistible. Above all, she has an unquenchable survival instinct. Surely a fleeting entanglement with one Audrey Avens, a bright, young, rising star in her company, won't bring down the Wicked Queen of Tinseltown. Or will it? Neve's public persona has no chink in the untouchable armor, but when the lights go out and the cameras stop rolling, what becomes of an Ice Queen whose heart is ruled by love and fear?
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Five stars isn't nearly enough!
- By MissLynn on 10-02-22
By: Milena McKay
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In the Dream House
- A Memoir
- By: Carmen Maria Machado
- Narrated by: Carmen Maria Machado
- Length: 5 hrs and 29 mins
- Unabridged
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In the Dream House is Carmen Maria Machado's engrossing and wildly innovative account of a relationship gone bad, and a bold dissection of the mechanisms and cultural representations of psychological abuse. Tracing the full arc of a harrowing relationship with a charismatic but volatile woman, Machado struggles to make sense of how what happened to her shaped the person she was becoming. And it's that struggle that gives the book its original structure: each chapter is driven by its own narrative trope - the haunted house, erotica, the bildungsroman....
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Devastatingly Beautiful
- By SeattleBookLover on 02-04-20
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Uncovered
- How I Left Hasidic Life and Finally Came Home
- By: Leah Lax
- Narrated by: Donna Postel
- Length: 13 hrs and 41 mins
- Unabridged
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In Uncovered, Leah Lax tells her story - beginning as a young teen who left her liberal, secular home for life as a Hasidic Jew and ending as a 40-something woman who has to abandon the only world she's known for 30 years in order to achieve personal freedom.
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Overly long
- By Lynn Metzger on 11-01-20
By: Leah Lax
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Queering the Tarot
- By: Cassandra Snow, Beth Maiden - Foreword by
- Narrated by: Leslie Howard
- Length: 8 hrs and 2 mins
- Unabridged
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Tarot is best used as a tool for self-discovery, healing, growth, empowerment, and liberation. Tarot archetypes provide the reader with a window into present circumstances and future potential. But what if that window only opened up on a world that was white, European, and heterosexual? The interpretations of the tarot that have been passed down through tradition presuppose a commonality and normalcy among humanity. At the root of card meanings are archetypes that we accept without questioning. But at what point do archetypes become stereotypes?
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Don't waste your time
- By Franz on 12-19-19
By: Cassandra Snow, and others
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Transformed
- 8 Book Magic Feminization Bundle
- By: Kenzie McKay
- Narrated by: Virtual Voice
- Length: 10 hrs and 34 mins
- Unabridged
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8 MAGICAL FEMINIZATION books that have never been published in any other collection! The men in these stories never knew that magic was real. And they certainly never imagined how it could change their lives forever. This collection includes: Wrong Cabin Her New Daughter Homecoming Mother of the Revolution Candy A Respectable Lady The Girlfriend Ring Almost Perfect
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that they found themselves
- By Richard R. on 11-12-24
By: Kenzie McKay
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In the Shadow of the Past
- Shadow Series, Book 1
- By: J.E. Leak
- Narrated by: Abby Craden
- Length: 11 hrs and 9 mins
- Unabridged
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In the shadowy world of 1940s New York City, a sultry spy falls for the one woman she shouldn't. When reporter Jenny Ryan’s father is murdered, her burning need for justice drives her to take on a ruthless tycoon. But her plan goes awry when she falls for the criminal’s alluring mistress, OSS agent Kathryn Hammond. Kathryn is more than just a popular nightclub singer with a glamorous façade. She’s an undercover spy, trapped stateside in a dead-end assignment while the war rages on in Europe.
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Hurry with part 2 & 3!!!
- By AmandaB on 05-09-22
By: J.E. Leak
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The Best of Us
- A Memoir
- By: Joyce Maynard
- Narrated by: Joyce Maynard
- Length: 12 hrs and 36 mins
- Unabridged
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In 2011, when she was in her late 50s, beloved author and journalist Joyce Maynard met the first true partner she had ever known. Jim wore a rakish hat over a good head of hair; he asked real questions and gave real answers; he loved to see Joyce shine, both in and out of the spotlight; and he didn't mind the mess she made in the kitchen. He was not the husband Joyce imagined, but he quickly became the partner she had always dreamed of. Then, just after their one-year wedding anniversary, her new husband was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer.
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I love Joyce Maynard- I'm a longtime fan
- By Susie Q on 11-06-17
By: Joyce Maynard
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Before We Were Trans
- A New History of Gender
- By: Dr. Kit Heyam Ph.D
- Narrated by: Dr. Kit Heyam Ph.D
- Length: 8 hrs and 2 mins
- Unabridged
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Before We Were Trans illuminates the stories of people across the globe, from antiquity to the present, whose experiences of gender have defied binary categories. Blending historical analysis with sharp cultural criticism, trans historian and activist Kit Heyam offers a new, radically inclusive trans history, chronicling expressions of trans experience that are often overlooked, like gender-nonconforming fashion and wartime stage performance. Heyam looks to the past to uncover new horizons for possible trans futures.
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The history we need right now
- By Daniel Hebert on 04-11-23
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By Way of Sorrow
- By: Robyn Gigl
- Narrated by: Marguerite Gavin
- Length: 10 hrs and 11 mins
- Unabridged
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Erin McCabe has been referred the biggest case of her career. Four months ago, William E. Townsend, Jr., son of a New Jersey state senator, was found fatally stabbed in a rundown motel near Atlantic City. Sharise Barnes, a 19-year-old transgender prostitute, is in custody, and given the evidence against her, there seems little doubt of a guilty verdict. Erin knows that defending Sharise will blow her own private life wide open, and doubtless deepen her estrangement from her family. Yet as a trans woman, she feels uniquely qualified to help Sharise.
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An amazing book, and excellent performance
- By Vimily on 04-16-25
By: Robyn Gigl
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No Strings Attached
- Pink Bean Series, Book 1
- By: Harper Bliss
- Narrated by: Angela Dawe
- Length: 6 hrs
- Unabridged
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Micky Ferro has lived her entire life according to other people's expectations. She married a man, had two children, and became a dutiful stay-at-home mom in suburban Sydney. Until she realized, with a little help from her best friend, that her picture-perfect life wasn't making her happy. On the first anniversary of her divorce, Micky decides it's time for the next step in her journey and gets a job at her neighborhood coffee shop, The Pink Bean.
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Great narration
- By MEIRAV C on 11-18-17
By: Harper Bliss
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Found in Transition
- A Mother's Evolution During Her Child's Gender Change
- By: Paria Hassouri MD
- Narrated by: Siiri Scott
- Length: 8 hrs and 33 mins
- Unabridged
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What do you do when, just before Thanksgiving at your mother's, your 14-year-old son asks you to iron the dress he recently purchased and plans to wear? Listeners learn the answer and much more in this wonderfully frank, loving, and practical account of parenting a transgender teen. Hassouri chronicles what amounts to a dual transition: as her child transitions from male to female, she navigates through anger, denial, and grief to eventual acceptance. Despite her experience advising other parents in her work as a pediatrician, she was blindsided by her child's gender identity.
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Truthful
- By Tasha N. Sena on 03-11-21
What listeners say about This Body I Wore
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Reviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- LB
- 10-16-22
Stunning
Beautiful personal story. From growing up on Long Island, to the 80s and 90s in NYC. Hearing about Diana’s fulfillment of her female-self from her own voice was moving and beautiful. I will miss having her in my ear.
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- Jessica
- 08-04-22
Perfect
This book is like feeling around in the dark for a light switch, and then finding it and turning it on, letting your eyes adjust. Totally engrossing, complicated and wise, beautifully narrated. I loved it.
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- Iaah L
- 06-07-24
A unique perspective, but frustratingly organized by every gf she ever had
This told a very unique perspective from a trans woman who came out later in life, not just to others but also herself. The perspective is unique and interesting but most of the memoir is organized by each successive girlfriend she ever had. It’s still varied and interesting for most of it but grows redundant after a while and I began to wonder when she was going to get to the point.
One thing I was uncomfortable with and that I think is important to note here- The author, a white woman, repeatedly quotes some of her Black students, using the n-word several times. It was very uncomfortable to listen to and I had to take a break from the book for a bit after about the 4th n-word out of her mouth. It isn’t like this is an old audiobook so it’s surreal to me that Audible allowed it and that the author didn’t appear to receive or heed any guidance around not saying the word. It wouldn’t have been difficult to have Audible insert bleeps instead of having her say the word.
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- A williams
- 01-30-25
Love the details
I was impressed with this story. Loved the way she did not leave out the details of growing up in a dysfunctional family. The second guessing your self and denial trans people go through was good to read about.
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- Sarah C
- 06-17-22
Beautiful, Tender, Fierce
This book touched me very deeply. I am humbled by the complexity of the human experience.
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- Micah Hoffman
- 07-15-22
A giant leap in human history coming to learn more about itself
This book is a vital submission to the historical record of trans experience. The gifted author walks the reader alongside her journey, cataloging, and drawing intimate meaning from her life's relationships, stories, truiumphs, and bewilderments. With poetic artistry, you find that as she grows, you grow alongside her. Goetsch's writing style is sharp, clever, and entertaining while also being intimate and tender. Somehow, each page is like the slow expert turning of a key to her experience and wisdom, each passage being revealed as the reader became ready to receive it. By the time the novel is complete, I felt that I knew not only knew Goetsch, but my society and my own life and authenticity better.
This book is for readers interested in trans experience, love, sex, and US society. In particular, it shares the story of a person born and labeled male in the 60s but who can't figure out what isn't clicking for this label. Why can't they have successful relationships, love, and confidence in their sexuality and identity? Why do they feel immense pleasure and resonances wearing, and even just thinking about women's clothes? With limited community, culture, and understanding, matched with no uncertain antipathy from the broader society, she explores the margins of cross-dressing in a largely unsympathetic and insensitive LGB and straight world. But community does arise, clarity is found, and authenticity realized. But then what?... This isn't just a memoir, but a meditation on authenticity and the courage required to be a sexual being in the world.
I gave it five stars because it is smartly written and crafted, entertaining, and full of important wisdom and knowledge presented in a fresh and unexpected way.
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- Joanne
- 08-05-24
Read beautifully! Amazing, smart and endearing individual.
The struggles of childhood is tough to read. Unfortunately, most people have hurtful memories. Author’s wonderful voice helps to acknowledge the sad times.
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- Katherine
- 08-27-22
Brave but too much score settling
This was very effectively narrated by the author. It’s a compelling memoir but I thought she used her story to settle too many scores against her by those who had wronged him.
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- JG Crim
- 01-05-24
The struggle for and the affirmation of self.
Goetsch is a great storyteller and educator. Describing her journey in understandable and human terms, makes this a compelling & transformative book.
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- eightball
- 01-02-25
The depth in which the story was told!
I loved the honesty in the thoughts and feelings in all aspects of the story!
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