
Awake
A Memoir
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Narrated by:
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Jen Hatmaker
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By:
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Jen Hatmaker
About this listen
From Jen Hatmaker—beloved New York Times bestselling author and host of the For the Love podcast—a brutally honest, funny, and revealing memoir about the traumatic end of her twenty-six-year-long marriage, and the beginning of a different kind of love story.
At 2:30 a.m. on July 11th, 2020, Jen Hatmaker woke up to her husband of twenty-six years whispering in his phone to another woman from their bed. It was the end of life as she knew it. In the months that followed, she went from being a shiny, funny, popular leader, to a divorced wreck on antidepressants and anti-anxiety meds parenting five kids alone with no clue about her own bank accounts. Having led millions of women for over a decade—urging them to embrace authenticity, find radical agency, and create healthy relationships—this seemed nothing less than total failure.
In Awake, Jen shares for the first time what happened when she found herself completely lost at sea—and how she made it to shore. In candid, surprisingly funny vignettes spanning forty years of girlhood, marriage, and parenting, Jen lays bare the disorienting upheaval of midlife—the implosion of a marriage, the unraveling of religious and cultural systems, and the grief that accompanies change you didn’t ask for. And, drawing on all her resources—from without and from within—Jen dares to question the systems beneath the whole house of cards, and to reckon with the myths, half-truths, and lies that brought her to this point.
More than one woman’s story, Awake is a critical analysis of the story given to all of us: the story of gender limitations, religious subservience, body shame, self-erasure. With refreshing candor, Jen explores a Midlife Renaissance—grieving what’s lost, cherishing possibility, and entering the second half of life wide awake.
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Overall
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What happens when you look at your life and think, I thought it would be better than this? You know you can’t stay where you are, but have no idea what to do next. When Jessica N. Turner, a mom of three, lost her 16-year-marriage after her husband came out as gay, her life shattered. With grit and determination, she picked up the pieces, chose hope and courageously rebuilt a beautiful next chapter.
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Honest advice
- By Anonymous User on 04-23-25
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Of Mess and Moxie
- Wrangling Delight out of This Wild and Glorious Life
- By: Jen Hatmaker
- Narrated by: Jen Hatmaker
- Length: 7 hrs and 57 mins
- Unabridged
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Jen Hatmaker believes backbone is the birthright of every woman. Women have been demonstrating resiliency and resolve since forever. They have incredibly strong shoulders to bear loss, hope, grief, and vision. But somehow women have gotten the message that pain and failure mean they must be doing things wrong, that they messed up the rules or tricks for a seamless life.
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didnt know it was religious
- By Blythe Cochran on 05-02-19
By: Jen Hatmaker
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This Changes Everything
- A Surprisingly Funny Story About Race, Cancer, Faith, and Other Things We Don't Talk About
- By: Tyler Merritt
- Narrated by: Tyler Merritt, Jerrie Merritt, David Tieche, and others
- Length: 8 hrs and 59 mins
- Unabridged
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When Tyler Merritt was diagnosed with cancer, everything he thought he knew about what mattered in life changed. This Changes Everything is a humorous and optimistic love letter to this beautiful life. Though he made it through a highly invasive surgery and thought he was in the clear, Tyler soon realized that the cancer had other plans. It wasn’t a question of if the tumor would come back for an encore, his doctors told him. It was a question of when.
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Relatable to other surgeries & illnesses
- By Seth Piguet on 05-15-25
By: Tyler Merritt
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Simple and Free
- 7 Experiments Against Excess
- By: Jen Hatmaker
- Narrated by: Jen Hatmaker
- Length: 10 hrs and 15 mins
- Unabridged
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Why do we pursue more when we’d be happier with less? In this updated edition of 7, New York Times best-selling author Jen Hatmaker tells the story of how she and her family tried to combat overindulgence - and what they learned along the way about living a truly meaningful life.
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Food for thought
- By nedmac mama on 04-01-21
By: Jen Hatmaker
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Interrupted
- When Jesus Wrecks Your Comfortable Christianity
- By: Jen Hatmaker
- Narrated by: Rebecca Gallagher
- Length: 6 hrs and 26 mins
- Unabridged
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Are you one of the millions who crave a new direction in the church, fed up with religious games, empty promises, and cultural Christianity? You are not alone. You are not crazy. Maybe Jesus is ready to interrupt your life. Snatching Jen Hatmaker from the grip of her consumer life, God began asking her questions like, "What is really the point of My Church? What have I really asked of you?" Transparent and imperfect, Jen will engage and inspire you to go beyond comfortable and answer for yourself the question she faced.
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If you're ready to be interrupted too...
- By Tamara Shope on 10-08-15
By: Jen Hatmaker
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Held Together
- A Shared Memoir of Motherhood, Medicine, and Imperfect Love
- By: Rebecca N. Thompson
- Narrated by: Courtney Patterson
- Length: 14 hrs and 53 mins
- Unabridged
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Seventeen years ago, when Rebecca Thompson endured a string of life-threatening pregnancy losses and rare medical conditions, her training as a physician didn’t protect her from feeling isolated and overwhelmed. What she longed for was a community of women—or even one encouraging story—to reassure her that she wasn’t alone. Deciding to create the community she couldn’t find in her own time of need, Dr. Thompson reached out to friends, patients, and medical colleagues and asked them to share the stories of their personal journeys to parenthood.
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A Clean Mess
- A Memoir of Sobriety After a Lifetime of Being Numb
- By: Tiffany Jenkins
- Narrated by: Tiffany Jenkins
- Length: 7 hrs and 3 mins
- Unabridged
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Told with humor and honesty, A Clean Mess is Tiffany Jenkins’s story of how she learned to live and feel for the first time without numbing herself with drugs—and how she discovered inner reserves of strength she didn’t know she had. From her tentative first days of sobriety, to seeing two pink lines on a pregnancy test weeks later, to navigating anxiety, a new marriage, and motherhood at the same time, to surviving betrayal and divorce, Jenkins shows how she got through it all when her crutches and Band-Aids were taken away from her.
By: Tiffany Jenkins
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Good Soil
- The Education of an Accidental Farmhand
- By: Jeff Chu
- Narrated by: Jeff Chu
- Length: 9 hrs and 11 mins
- Unabridged
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In his late thirties, Jeff Chu left his job as a magazine writer and found himself at Princeton Theological Seminary’s “Farminary”—a twenty-one-acre working farm where students learn to cultivate the earth while examining life’s biggest questions. Now, he unpacks what he learned about creating “good soil,” both literally and figuratively, drawing lessons from the rhythms of growth, decay, and regeneration that define life on the land. In gorgeous, transporting reflections, Chu introduces us to the cast of characters, human and not, who became his teachers.
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Beautiful
- By Ehom on 05-07-25
By: Jeff Chu
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We Did Ok, Kid
- A Memoir
- By: Sir Anthony Hopkins
- Narrated by: Sir Anthony Hopkins
- Length: 13 hrs and 30 mins
- Unabridged
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Born and raised in Port Talbot—a small Welsh steelworks town—amid war and depression, Sir Anthony Hopkins grew up around men who were tough, to say the least, and eschewed all forms of emotional vulnerability in favor of alcoholism and brutality. A struggling student in school, he was deemed by his peers, his parents, and other adults as a failure with no future ahead of him. But, on a fateful Saturday night, the disregarded Welsh boy watched the 1948 adaptation of Hamlet, sparking a passion for acting that would lead him on a path that no one could have predicted.
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A Modern Girl’s Guide to Bible Study: A Refreshingly Unique Look at God’s Word
- Modern Girl's Bible Study, Book 1
- By: Jen Hatmaker
- Narrated by: Monique Makena
- Length: 6 hrs and 8 mins
- Unabridged
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Written specifically for today's busy women, this book offers user-friendly advice on how to get the most from personal Bible study time. Transform the academic nature of Bible study into a fresh, simple format that will radically change the way you interact with scripture forever. This great leader's resource can be used with the Modern Girl's Bible Study series or as a tool for discipleship ministry.
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Not into being called "Girl!" every other page.
- By Josi on 05-15-19
By: Jen Hatmaker
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The Book of Alchemy
- A Creative Practice for an Inspired Life
- By: Suleika Jaouad
- Narrated by: Suleika Jaouad, Vidish Athavale, Fabian Cook Jr., and others
- Length: 9 hrs and 19 mins
- Unabridged
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From the time she was young, Suleika Jaouad has kept a journal. She’s used it to mark life's biggest occasions and to weather its most ferocious storms. Journaling has buoyed her through illness, heartbreak, and the deepest uncertainty. And she is not alone: for so many people, keeping a journal is an essential tool for navigating both the personal peaks and valleys and the collective challenges of modern life. More than ever, we need a space for puzzling through.
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Suleika is a gift
- By Amazon Customer on 05-17-25
By: Suleika Jaouad
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Mental Health & Murder
- Understanding the Darkness That Consumed My Sister
- By: Joe Hastings
- Narrated by: Patrick Shannon
- Length: 4 hrs and 50 mins
- Unabridged
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With those chilling words, the author’s world was shattered. What began as an unimaginable tragedy unraveled into a devastating story of mental illness, family bonds, and the fragile line between love and fear. In this gripping true crime memoir, the author takes listeners inside the courtroom where shocking revelations exposed the depth of his sister’s mental unraveling. Through raw and unflinching honesty, he reflects on the haunting events that led to that fateful day and the lasting impact on those left behind.
By: Joe Hastings