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Charlotte Illes Is Not a Teacher
Not a Detective
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Narrated by:
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Katie Siegel
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By:
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Katie Siegel
About this listen
Former child detective Charlotte “Lottie” Illes is all grown up and going back to school in this fresh, delightfully modern mystery in the Not a Detective series, based on the much-loved TikTok web series.
Mention “returning to the scene of a crime,” and people don’t usually picture a middle school. But that’s where kid detective Lottie Illes enjoyed some of her greatest successes, solving mysteries and winning acclaim—before the world of adult responsibilities came crashing in …
Twentysomething Charlotte is now back in the classroom, this time as a substitute teacher. However, as much as she’s tried to escape the shadow of her younger self, others haven’t forgotten about Lottie. In fact, a fellow teacher is hoping for help discovering the culprit behind anonymous threats being sent to her and her aunt, who’s running for reelection to the Board of Education.
At first, Charlotte assumes the messages are a harmless prank. But maybe it’s a good thing she left a detective kit hidden in the band room storage closet all those years ago—just in case. Because the threats are escalating, and it’s clear that untangling mysteries isn’t child’s play anymore …
“Charlotte Illes may not be a detective, or a teacher, but she is an absolute delight.”—Kemper Donovan, author of The Busy Body
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Overall
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Jazz Bashara is a criminal. Well, sort of. Life on Artemis, the first and only city on the moon, is tough if you're not a rich tourist or an eccentric billionaire. So smuggling in the occasional harmless bit of contraband barely counts, right? Not when you've got debts to pay and your job as a porter barely covers the rent. Everything changes when Jazz sees the chance to commit the perfect crime, with a reward too lucrative to turn down.
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A ferrari with no motor
- By will on 11-18-17
By: Andy Weir
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The Ex
- By: Freida McFadden
- Narrated by: Nicol Zanzarella
- Length: 8 hrs and 33 mins
- Unabridged
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Cassie thinks she has met the perfect man. Joel is sweet, handsome, romantic, and best of all, he’s crazy about Cassie. She thinks she’s found the guy she’ll spend the rest of her life with. Have children with. Grow old with. Yes, she knows about his perfect ex-girlfriend, Francesca. The beautiful, brilliant chef, beloved by all his friends. But she thinks Francesca is out of the picture. She thinks Francesca is gone for good. Think again, Cassie.
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Too bizarre for someone who loves bizarre
- By G. C. Webster on 07-01-22
By: Freida McFadden
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Say No More
- By: Caroline Overington
- Narrated by: Anna Skellern
- Length: 5 hrs and 47 mins
- Original Recording
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Who is Audrey Hoedemaker? It's a question her sister Maureen has heard more times than she can count, and she doesn't know what the short answer would be. Little sister, troubled teen, backpacker, musical theatre coach, con artist, childcare worker. Murderer. A tragic, traumatic childhood casts a long shadow on the Hoedemaker sisters. Maureen has worked hard to move beyond the violence of the past and build a good, honest life for herself. Audrey, however, just can't seem to do the same, careening from one state of chaos to another.
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Seriously, that was the ending?
- By alicia in athens on 02-13-25
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10 Rules for the Perfect Murder
- By: James Patterson, Chris Tebbetts
- Narrated by: Reid Scott, Cobie Smulders, full cast
- Length: 3 hrs and 2 mins
- Original Recording
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After the killing of a prominent mob lawyer, NYPD homicide detectives Jacob Jackson and Caitlin Grimes start receive chilling, written “rules” for how to commit the perfect murder. "Rule number one for the perfect murder: Evidence is your enemy. Leave none behind." Jackson (Reid Scott) and Grimes (Cobie Smulders) race to find the killer, setting them on a collision course with the city’s crime underbelly, and a perpetrator who seems happy to toy with them. “Rule number two. No crimes of passion. The perfect murder is always business, never pleasure.”
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Tricky
- By Robert Scott Read on 10-30-24
By: James Patterson, and others
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7 Hours to Die
- By: James Patterson, Duane Swierczynski
- Narrated by: Sarah Paulson, Patina Miller, Mel Rodriguez, and others
- Length: 2 hrs and 25 mins
- Original Recording
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Kidnappers grabbed Jenna in broad daylight, right in front of her children and their horrified classmates. Her family was issued an insane ransom demand: $25 million in cash and jewels, payable by the end of the school day, otherwise they’ll never see her again. As Jenna’s mother scrambles to gather the money, detectives Mo Butler and George Ortega follow the trail of the kidnappers, which will lead them through a sordid landscape of jealous lovers, broken dreamers, and twisted schemers. But every second counts, and there’s one thing Jenna Wade doesn’t have: very much time.
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This was such a fun Quick listen
- By Mdc on 10-08-24
By: James Patterson, and others
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Fahrenheit 451
- By: Ray Bradbury
- Narrated by: Tim Robbins
- Length: 5 hrs and 1 min
- Unabridged
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Guy Montag is a fireman. In his world, where television rules and literature is on the brink of extinction, firemen start fires rather than put them out. His job is to destroy the most illegal of commodities, the printed book, along with the houses in which they are hidden. Montag never questions the destruction and ruin his actions produce, returning each day to his bland life and wife, Mildred, who spends all day with her television "family."
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Wish I Hadn't Cliff Noted This in High School
- By Joel on 03-27-17
By: Ray Bradbury
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Sherlock Holmes: The Definitive Collection
- By: Arthur Conan Doyle, Stephen Fry - introductions
- Narrated by: Stephen Fry
- Length: 71 hrs and 57 mins
- Unabridged
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Ever since he made his first appearance in A Study In Scarlet, Sherlock Holmes has enthralled and delighted millions of fans throughout the world. Now Audible is proud to present Arthur Conan Doyle's Sherlock Holmes, read by Stephen Fry. A lifelong fan of Doyle's detective fiction, Fry has narrated the definitive collection of Sherlock Holmes - four novels and four collections of short stories. And, exclusively for Audible, Stephen has written and narrated eight insightful introductions, one for each title.
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Chapter Guide!
- By Katya Rice on 05-25-18
By: Arthur Conan Doyle, and others
What listeners say about Charlotte Illes Is Not a Teacher
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- qnofrogs
- 09-08-24
Cannot wait to hear what else Charlotte Illes is not
I’ve enjoyed both Charlotte Illes books and I hope there are many more in the pipeline! All of the characters have flaws that are entirely relatable and just like IRL they struggle to identify their flaws and then deal with them. What I enjoy most about the characters is how much they love and respect each other regardless of, or maybe even because of, the flaws. I especially appreciate the matter of fact acknowledgment of various ethnicities and gender identities.
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- orlandoawilliams
- 08-02-24
Charlotte working her way through being a grown-up
I think this is an excellent 2nd installment to the series. I feel like I've gotten more insight into a generation and demographic of people I don't get to interact with. I'm not sure what to think about learning that many of the issues faced by people in their mid twenties today are the same as we had four decades ago. We should have done better by them. But I'm sure Charlotte and company will persevere!
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